What We Let Pass By
Ch. 5
There
On our way back to Balamb I studied Squall. I couldn't tell if he was angry or sad, hurt or jealous. I used to wonder why he acted the way he did. Now I knew, things like this always happened to him. Whenever he was somewhere close to happiness it was taken away from him.
I stood next to the brooding Squall. I would never leave him, how come he doesn't realize that?
The Ragonark pulled up to Balamb. Without a word to any of us Squall stomps off.
* * * * *
I hated it, I couldn't stand it, I despised it when I couldn't control my emotions and at the moment they where about to boil over.
I stepped off the Ragonark and stormed to the garden. I didn't want any of my friends to see me right now. When I walked into the garden I discovered that I had entered some sort of convention, in the entrance to the garden where hundreds of SeeDs and students. At the top of the stairs speaking was Xu.
"Until general Quistis comes back there nothing that I can do," Xu informed the crowd.
"Those Galbadian basterds deserve to pay!" I heard someone shout from the crowd.
"I agree," Xu said "but we"- she was cut off from another shout.
"My best friend was killed!"
"We just have to wait till," Xu was cut off again, but this time by Quistis.
"Xu, I'm here. I'll handle this," the crowd made a path for Quistis to walk through everyone watched as she joined Xu at the top of the steps.
"Balamb," Quistis addressed the crowd. "Galbadia has for the last time misused our trust. Believe when I say those basterds will pay." I listened as the crowd roared with emotion at Quistis' words, Quistis motions for the crowd to quiet which they obeyed immediately. From there she continues "I will fight, but I only will be able to lead you so far. This is my fight, but it's not my war. There can only be one true leader for this battle and that leader is Squall Lionheart." I watched as everyone turns to me. What was Quistis talking about? My war since when, I barely counted myself a SeeD. Quistis walks down the stairs and stands next to me.
"I'm resigning from general," Quistis told the crowd only giving them a few seconds to react. "As my last act as general I'm promoting Squall as our new general." Everyone completely shocked looked at Quistis, including myself. Quistis gently put her hand on my shoulder staring only at me she says.
"This isn't my war Squall, it never was and you know it." I nod understanding. I looked at the path that the crowd made for me just like the one that they made for Quistis. Slowly I began to walk through, hesitating only once to throw a look back at Quistis who nodded. I then continued my way till I was on top of the stairs next to Xu who pats me on the back.
"It's all yours general," she told me.
I looked around the crowd and now standing in front was Quistis, Zell, Selphie and Irvine supporting me like they always have. At that moment I knew this was where I was suppose to be and even though a big piece was still missing in my heart I had never felt so whole. Taking a deep breathe I began speaking to the crowd.
"We tried to unite with Galbadia, right? After all where all SeeD's," I said that last part sarcastically. "Well to hell with that!" The crowd roars the same way it did with Quistis. "Officially right now Balamb Garden has declared war on Galbadia!" Leaving it at that I stepped down that stairs where I joined my friends. They all gave me encouraging smiles and pats on the back.
"Now what do we do?" Zell asked.
Sternly I tell him "Prepare for war."
* * * * *
Seifer had just left with Rajiin and Fujin to take care of some "business." We hadn't had a chance to talk since I left my fathers. I told him I really needed to be with someone right now, but he just disregarded my feelings in his Seifer way.
"Rinoa, we have to take care of some business. I promise we'll talk when I get back."
"What do you have to take care of thats suddenly so important?"
"Something Rinoa, okay?"
"No, please Seifer," I grabbed his arm. Looking like he was deciding something he suddenly shakes my hands off his arm. "We'll be back soon." With that he left. He always be there, the irony of Seifer's departure was funny to me. In my palace I sat around knowing that Seifer's "Business" had something to do with Balamb garden and Squall, because neither would let Seifer and his Galbadian garden get away with what they did.
I was sitting in my office contemplating when I heard a knock on my door. It was my father, telling him to come in I adjusted myself in my seat feeling a little uncomfortable by his presents. He came in and sat down in the chair across from my desk where I was sitting. There was silence between the two of us.
I never understood my father's motives with Seifer. I guess I simply never cared enough to ask. Now that it was just the two of us with really nothing more to talk about I didn't let the opportunity pass me by.
"Why do you want me to be with Seifer so bad? What political scam do you have up your sleeve?" Whatever answer I was expecting from him it was far from the one he gave me.
"Rinoa, I'm getting old," I gave him a queer look as he continued. "I just want to know that someone will be here to take care of you when I'm gone." I looked at him with my mouth hanging open. I wasn't even capable at the moment to responding to him.
"I know that Almansy isn't your prince charming, but he will be here with you."
"Do you really want me to be with someone like Seifer?" I managed to ask. He took a moment before responding.
"That Lionheart isn't who I imagined you with and it worries me that he's a SeeD." My father was referring to what SeeD's true purpose was, destroy the sorceress. I listened to my father continue. "Your so vive rant and alive just like your mother Lionheart, however, he's.he's."
"Like you," I finished his sentence for him watching my father nod.
"He is in some ways like you," I told him walking over so I was standing next to his chair "But yet your completely opposites. Squall needed me and I needed him. You and Seifer aren't needy people, but Squall as much as he tried to deny it was. It's that need that made me love him."
"You make love sound pass tense."
"I kinda have to now," He looks at me and with a deep sigh he says.
"You know Rinoa he did come for you." I looked at my father.
"Three years ago, just a couple days after you returned to Deling City Lionheart came to the mansion asking for a pass to see you. I didn't want to give it to him you had just came back and I was afraid he was going to take you away again, but he was so determined to see you I thought it was futile to try so I gave him the pass."
I took everything my father said in, once thinking it over I asked. "But if he did come how was it that I never saw him?"
"Seifer saw him first," was my fathers answer.
"What would that matter?"
"I'm not sure what words where exchanged between the two, but whatever Seifer said it was enough to make Lionheart leave."
I swallowed it all in disbelief. So he did come. I watched as my father got up from his seat and stood next to me putting his hand on my shoulder.
"I should have told you."
"It's alright," I consoled.
With one last sigh the old general said to me. "Go get him."
"What?"
"Go get your prince charming."
I got up and flung my arms around him "Oh daddy!" I wailed as I gave him a big kiss on the forehead. With a smile I left him..
The old general watched as his daughter left him happily. So this Squall was who made his daughter happy he thought to himself. He suddenly felt a wave of guilt splash over him for keeping that happiness away from hi daughter for so many years.
* * * * *
I was told to report to the headmaster's office. This time I actually did. He was alone in his office when I came in. I didn't take a seat, but stood there before him waiting for the headmaster to address me.
"So you the new general," it was more a statement then a question.
"Yes sir."
The headmaster smiles "I'm glad. Don't you get me wrong Quistis made a fine general, but she's right this is your war."
I didn't react to the headmasters words merely stood there. The headmaster chuckled.
"Squall when are you going to realize that you can't always take things so seriously?" Irritated by the headmasters comments I say to him.
"Were about to go into war, sir, this isn't something that should be taken lightly."
"Very true, but remember why we fight in the first place?"
With actual curiosity I asked. "Why do we fight sir?"
"I thought you of all people would have learned that by know Squall," I shamefully shake my head. "Why to protect those we love." He told me.
"Then why have SeeD? Why disperse us around the country to fight other people's problems? That's not protecting the people we love."
The headmaster took my questions very seriously when he answered "SeeD are two-faced. We have our good side and our bad. It be hypercritical to preach against wars when often were the one's creating them."
"Then why?"
"Because bottom line when things get rough were there."
Without another word the headmaster dismissed me. Despite having left his office his final words stuck to me, were there, it was funny because that was the very thing that Rinoa accused me of not being, "There."
Leaving Cid's I ran into Zell who was looking for me.
"Hey Squall; Quistis wants you at the loudspeaker."
"Thanks," I said changing my direction to the loudspeaker. Zell was still with me.
"Squall?" he asked.
"Yes."
"Were friends right?"
I stopped the question caught me off-guard. Looking back at Zell I asked him "Why would you ask that?"
"Err.it's just you always seem annoyed by me. I don't know I feel stupid even askin, but." he stopped there. I felt bad; here Zell thought I didn't like him when it was the exact opposite.
"Zell, you are one of my best friends you always have been. I'm just sorry I've never told you before." I gave him an unaccustomed pat on the back which made Zell beam.
"Really Squall? You're like my best friend too."
As corny as it all may have sounded it felt good to get it out. I reminded myself to tell Quistis, Selphie and Irvine what I told Zell.
Zell and I made it to the loudspeaker where Quistis was waiting along with Selphie and Irvine.
"Your SeeD's are waiting." Quistis told me. I didn't like it that she called them "my" SeeD's, nevertheless, I turned the loudspeaker on.
"Balamb this is Squall. I suppose there's a lot that could be said, but I'm going to leave it unsaid. Everyone's fighting for their own reasons, but we all have the same bottom line and that is when things get rough were all there for each other. So I guess what I really want to say to all of you is good luck everyone fight hard, fight strong, but please don't forget what you're fighting for." I clicked off the loudspeaker."
"That's good stuff Squall," Irvine smiled.
"It sounds like you never stop being general," Quistis told me.
"Maybe in my heart I never did," I told her. I then turned to Nida, the Balamb pilot, who was standing there waiting. "Set course for the Galbadia garden." I commanded.
* * * * *
The garden was set for defense and even though Balamb had yet to show any signs of attacking I knew it be best if we where ready. The Galbadian garden was displeased with me for attacking Balamb in the first place. My political status was going down fast. The only comforting thought I had at the moment was knowing that Rinoa was at the palace waiting for me.
Through my own thoughts I heard my pilot yell.
"There coming!"
I quickly clicked on the loudspeaker. "Battle stations everyone!" I shouted over the loudspeaker before turning it off. I hung on to a rail as Balamb garden collided with us.
* * * * *
We crashed directly into Galbadia "Again!" I yelled to Nida, who did just that. This time the collision left an opening in the Galbadian garden.
"Come on!" I yelled to my friends waving my gunblade, with them following we charged to the Galbadian garden. Gaining crowds of Balamb SeeD's as we ran.
Through the Galbadian's we went with our resentment and determination leading the way.
When we arrived in their garden Irvine joked "Haven't we done this before?"
Ignoring Irvine's comment we moved further into the garden managing the Galbadians that dared go cross our path. I didn't know what the others where looking for, but there was only one destination for me, Seifer. It wasn't long before I met that destination.
"Oh it's so heart warming to see you all together again.wait a minute. no I lied it really isn't all that heart warming." We had met Seifer and he looked just as resentful and determined as us.
"This is where your guy's reunion is going to end," Seifer says as he lifts up his gunblade releasing it with full force towards my head. With a clash his gunblade collided with mine.
As everyone gathered around Seifer with their weapons out Seifer snarls.
"What don't have enough balls to take me on alone Squall?"
I waved with my hand for everyone to back off, which they all did. Turning to Seifer I say.
"Hope you're ready to dance Seifer?"
"The only dancing I'm going to be doing is dancing away with Rinoa." At Seifer's reply I go for the strike which Seifer easily defended.
"Squall did you honestly think Rinoa was going to pick you?" Not saying anything I striked again.
"Squall you old-boy, why would you want to be with Rinoa? You're not exactly a people person and you're nothing alike." I striked again several more times before I answered.
"Because I love her," Seifer stared at me and I stared back as Seifer was catching his breathe.
"How dare you." Seifer finally said going on a rampage against me. Strike after strike all in which I defended. When Seifer stopped to catch his breathe I asked.
"Do you love her Seifer?"
Seifer glaring at me says "I'm not answering to you Squall." At Seifer's last words I threw down my gunblade. Everyone, including Seifer looks at me with disbelief.
"What the hell do you think your doing?" Seifer asked to astonished to strike.
"Seifer, I'm realizing that what it comes down to for me is I just want her to be happy." Seifer takes a moment before answering.
"She's not going to be happy with me. I was never who she wanted to be with, but I really don't give a damn about what she wants. I know what I want and the only thing getting in the way of what I want is you!" Seifer goes for another strike for what I thought would be my final blow when Zell jumps up taking in the stomach Seifer's gunblade.
"NOOOO!!!" I yelled catching Zell as he was falling to the ground. Seifer pulled back his gunblade watching the blood drip from it. I looked down at Zell who was trying to keep his eyes open. Desperately I say to Zell.
"Hang on buddy we'll get you back to the garden and everything will be alright."
"Squall," I felt Zell grab my arm with all his remaining strength "I'm glad you came back." After that I watch as Zell's eyes flutter open and close until they where just closed...
"Zell...Zell buddy, come on." Zell wasn't responding he wasn't dead, but just barely hanging on. I hear Selphie's crying and looked to see the tears rolling down Quistis and Irvine's faces they where the tears of almost losing a friend. I then shot a look at Seifer. I didn't know what I was expecting remorse, tears, angry., but never even from Seifer did I expect what I saw. Seifer was smiling. Seifer catching my stare locked his eyes on mine and with a laugh said.
"Looks like the chicken-wuss met the ends I always knew he would.death by my blade." At Seifer's words at once Quistis, Selphie and Irvine all lounged for Seifer, but I caught them all. Picking back up my gunblade I said to them.
"This is my war let me finish it!" They all dutifully back off, but I missed my chance by now Galbadian SeeDs where gathering. Seifer begins to walk away shouting back at us.
"I'll be catchin you guys later!" I ran after him only to have dozens of Galbadians pushing me back. We fought through them, but it was too late Seifer was no where to be found.
"Dammit!!!" I yelled and punched the wall. I began to shake uncontrollable. I was suppressed with so many emotions at the moment that I couldn't control it any longer. It took Quistis' guiding hand on my shoulder to control my madness.
"Squall, come on lets go home."
"But, but Seifer he"- I started, but was cut off by Quistis.
"Seifer will be taken care of, but now there's other things to take care of, like Zell." I throw my head down and nod.
"Let's take care of that," I said running back to Zell.
* * * * *
Upon arriving at Balamb I had a terrible feeling which only worsened as I drew closer to the garden. I walked in the garden to find it in suddle turmoil. It wasn't chaos, but everyone that I had seen seemed to be lost. Right away I knew what must have happened, but I still hoped that it wasn't the case.
Walking a little further I literally ran into Quistis. She also had that lost look on her face, but she also seemed to be carrying a level of anger and sadness that all the people around her where not. With us both stopped in front of each other I asked.
"Quistis what's wrong?"
There's something about you Rinoa Heartilly," was Quistis' reply.
I gave her a queer look "What are you talking about Quistis?"
"Things just sort of happen to you and you just shrug it off not caring about who you might actually be shrugging off."
"Quistis please," I was confused and a little hurt by what she was saying. Quistis loosing it yells at me.
"What the hell are you even doing here Rinoa!?" You don't belong here?"
Stepping back from her I gain enough composure to ask "Do you know where I can find Squall?" Quistis giving me a sharp glare tells me.
"He's probably in the infirmary."
Her words terrified me "Infirmary?" I asked "What happened, is he alright?" I was holding my breathe waiting for Quistis' answer.
"Oh come off it Rinoa you know it doesn't matter one way or another to you." I gave Quistis a pained look. Why was she saying these things? Unmercifully Quistis continued to talk "Just get the hell out of my face!"
Without another thought towards Quistis I ran to the infirmary with my heart in my throat, if anything happened to Squall.The thought was simply unbearable.
In entering the infirmary I let out a breathe of relief, there Squall was leaning over a bed, he was alright. Stepping closer he still hadn't noticed me, but I did notice who was in the bed.it was Zell. I gasped causing Squall to turn around towards me. I thought Quistis looked lost, angry and sad, but Squall looked all those things ten times over.
"Squall," I cried but he turned away from me "Squall," I repeated on the verge of tears.
"What are you doing here Rinoa?" Squall asked all the tenderness that usually filled his voice was gone.
"Squall, I had to see you,"
"Me.? Me.?" My words seemed to bring him to a form of hysteria "Look at Zell!" he demanded "I don't matter."
"But you do Squall that's the whole point." I ran over to him kneeling down "Squall I came here to tell you I need you. I can't keep going anymore without you." I looked hopefully up at his grayish blue eyes.
"Don't be ridiculous Rinoa," was all Squall said. His words made my heart clench.
"Ridiculous? How can you say our love is Ridiculous?" I cried appalled. Squall stood there silently looking at Zell.
"Well say something dammit!" I cried once again not able to take his silence any longer.
Squall looking directly at me says "The most ridiculous thing that you ever said was calling what we had love. How can love bring so much pain?"
I couldn't believe what he was saying. "You can't mean that?" I asked tears where starting to roll down my cheeks, but I didn't care. Squall merely stood there.
"Squall," I begged, now almost drowning in my own tears.
"Rinoa, I think you better go."
"I guess I should!" I cried storming out of the infirmary. I ran and ran after that. I ran from Squall, I ran from the garden and I ran from the pain. I ran to Seifer.
On our way back to Balamb I studied Squall. I couldn't tell if he was angry or sad, hurt or jealous. I used to wonder why he acted the way he did. Now I knew, things like this always happened to him. Whenever he was somewhere close to happiness it was taken away from him.
I stood next to the brooding Squall. I would never leave him, how come he doesn't realize that?
The Ragonark pulled up to Balamb. Without a word to any of us Squall stomps off.
* * * * *
I hated it, I couldn't stand it, I despised it when I couldn't control my emotions and at the moment they where about to boil over.
I stepped off the Ragonark and stormed to the garden. I didn't want any of my friends to see me right now. When I walked into the garden I discovered that I had entered some sort of convention, in the entrance to the garden where hundreds of SeeDs and students. At the top of the stairs speaking was Xu.
"Until general Quistis comes back there nothing that I can do," Xu informed the crowd.
"Those Galbadian basterds deserve to pay!" I heard someone shout from the crowd.
"I agree," Xu said "but we"- she was cut off from another shout.
"My best friend was killed!"
"We just have to wait till," Xu was cut off again, but this time by Quistis.
"Xu, I'm here. I'll handle this," the crowd made a path for Quistis to walk through everyone watched as she joined Xu at the top of the steps.
"Balamb," Quistis addressed the crowd. "Galbadia has for the last time misused our trust. Believe when I say those basterds will pay." I listened as the crowd roared with emotion at Quistis' words, Quistis motions for the crowd to quiet which they obeyed immediately. From there she continues "I will fight, but I only will be able to lead you so far. This is my fight, but it's not my war. There can only be one true leader for this battle and that leader is Squall Lionheart." I watched as everyone turns to me. What was Quistis talking about? My war since when, I barely counted myself a SeeD. Quistis walks down the stairs and stands next to me.
"I'm resigning from general," Quistis told the crowd only giving them a few seconds to react. "As my last act as general I'm promoting Squall as our new general." Everyone completely shocked looked at Quistis, including myself. Quistis gently put her hand on my shoulder staring only at me she says.
"This isn't my war Squall, it never was and you know it." I nod understanding. I looked at the path that the crowd made for me just like the one that they made for Quistis. Slowly I began to walk through, hesitating only once to throw a look back at Quistis who nodded. I then continued my way till I was on top of the stairs next to Xu who pats me on the back.
"It's all yours general," she told me.
I looked around the crowd and now standing in front was Quistis, Zell, Selphie and Irvine supporting me like they always have. At that moment I knew this was where I was suppose to be and even though a big piece was still missing in my heart I had never felt so whole. Taking a deep breathe I began speaking to the crowd.
"We tried to unite with Galbadia, right? After all where all SeeD's," I said that last part sarcastically. "Well to hell with that!" The crowd roars the same way it did with Quistis. "Officially right now Balamb Garden has declared war on Galbadia!" Leaving it at that I stepped down that stairs where I joined my friends. They all gave me encouraging smiles and pats on the back.
"Now what do we do?" Zell asked.
Sternly I tell him "Prepare for war."
* * * * *
Seifer had just left with Rajiin and Fujin to take care of some "business." We hadn't had a chance to talk since I left my fathers. I told him I really needed to be with someone right now, but he just disregarded my feelings in his Seifer way.
"Rinoa, we have to take care of some business. I promise we'll talk when I get back."
"What do you have to take care of thats suddenly so important?"
"Something Rinoa, okay?"
"No, please Seifer," I grabbed his arm. Looking like he was deciding something he suddenly shakes my hands off his arm. "We'll be back soon." With that he left. He always be there, the irony of Seifer's departure was funny to me. In my palace I sat around knowing that Seifer's "Business" had something to do with Balamb garden and Squall, because neither would let Seifer and his Galbadian garden get away with what they did.
I was sitting in my office contemplating when I heard a knock on my door. It was my father, telling him to come in I adjusted myself in my seat feeling a little uncomfortable by his presents. He came in and sat down in the chair across from my desk where I was sitting. There was silence between the two of us.
I never understood my father's motives with Seifer. I guess I simply never cared enough to ask. Now that it was just the two of us with really nothing more to talk about I didn't let the opportunity pass me by.
"Why do you want me to be with Seifer so bad? What political scam do you have up your sleeve?" Whatever answer I was expecting from him it was far from the one he gave me.
"Rinoa, I'm getting old," I gave him a queer look as he continued. "I just want to know that someone will be here to take care of you when I'm gone." I looked at him with my mouth hanging open. I wasn't even capable at the moment to responding to him.
"I know that Almansy isn't your prince charming, but he will be here with you."
"Do you really want me to be with someone like Seifer?" I managed to ask. He took a moment before responding.
"That Lionheart isn't who I imagined you with and it worries me that he's a SeeD." My father was referring to what SeeD's true purpose was, destroy the sorceress. I listened to my father continue. "Your so vive rant and alive just like your mother Lionheart, however, he's.he's."
"Like you," I finished his sentence for him watching my father nod.
"He is in some ways like you," I told him walking over so I was standing next to his chair "But yet your completely opposites. Squall needed me and I needed him. You and Seifer aren't needy people, but Squall as much as he tried to deny it was. It's that need that made me love him."
"You make love sound pass tense."
"I kinda have to now," He looks at me and with a deep sigh he says.
"You know Rinoa he did come for you." I looked at my father.
"Three years ago, just a couple days after you returned to Deling City Lionheart came to the mansion asking for a pass to see you. I didn't want to give it to him you had just came back and I was afraid he was going to take you away again, but he was so determined to see you I thought it was futile to try so I gave him the pass."
I took everything my father said in, once thinking it over I asked. "But if he did come how was it that I never saw him?"
"Seifer saw him first," was my fathers answer.
"What would that matter?"
"I'm not sure what words where exchanged between the two, but whatever Seifer said it was enough to make Lionheart leave."
I swallowed it all in disbelief. So he did come. I watched as my father got up from his seat and stood next to me putting his hand on my shoulder.
"I should have told you."
"It's alright," I consoled.
With one last sigh the old general said to me. "Go get him."
"What?"
"Go get your prince charming."
I got up and flung my arms around him "Oh daddy!" I wailed as I gave him a big kiss on the forehead. With a smile I left him..
The old general watched as his daughter left him happily. So this Squall was who made his daughter happy he thought to himself. He suddenly felt a wave of guilt splash over him for keeping that happiness away from hi daughter for so many years.
* * * * *
I was told to report to the headmaster's office. This time I actually did. He was alone in his office when I came in. I didn't take a seat, but stood there before him waiting for the headmaster to address me.
"So you the new general," it was more a statement then a question.
"Yes sir."
The headmaster smiles "I'm glad. Don't you get me wrong Quistis made a fine general, but she's right this is your war."
I didn't react to the headmasters words merely stood there. The headmaster chuckled.
"Squall when are you going to realize that you can't always take things so seriously?" Irritated by the headmasters comments I say to him.
"Were about to go into war, sir, this isn't something that should be taken lightly."
"Very true, but remember why we fight in the first place?"
With actual curiosity I asked. "Why do we fight sir?"
"I thought you of all people would have learned that by know Squall," I shamefully shake my head. "Why to protect those we love." He told me.
"Then why have SeeD? Why disperse us around the country to fight other people's problems? That's not protecting the people we love."
The headmaster took my questions very seriously when he answered "SeeD are two-faced. We have our good side and our bad. It be hypercritical to preach against wars when often were the one's creating them."
"Then why?"
"Because bottom line when things get rough were there."
Without another word the headmaster dismissed me. Despite having left his office his final words stuck to me, were there, it was funny because that was the very thing that Rinoa accused me of not being, "There."
Leaving Cid's I ran into Zell who was looking for me.
"Hey Squall; Quistis wants you at the loudspeaker."
"Thanks," I said changing my direction to the loudspeaker. Zell was still with me.
"Squall?" he asked.
"Yes."
"Were friends right?"
I stopped the question caught me off-guard. Looking back at Zell I asked him "Why would you ask that?"
"Err.it's just you always seem annoyed by me. I don't know I feel stupid even askin, but." he stopped there. I felt bad; here Zell thought I didn't like him when it was the exact opposite.
"Zell, you are one of my best friends you always have been. I'm just sorry I've never told you before." I gave him an unaccustomed pat on the back which made Zell beam.
"Really Squall? You're like my best friend too."
As corny as it all may have sounded it felt good to get it out. I reminded myself to tell Quistis, Selphie and Irvine what I told Zell.
Zell and I made it to the loudspeaker where Quistis was waiting along with Selphie and Irvine.
"Your SeeD's are waiting." Quistis told me. I didn't like it that she called them "my" SeeD's, nevertheless, I turned the loudspeaker on.
"Balamb this is Squall. I suppose there's a lot that could be said, but I'm going to leave it unsaid. Everyone's fighting for their own reasons, but we all have the same bottom line and that is when things get rough were all there for each other. So I guess what I really want to say to all of you is good luck everyone fight hard, fight strong, but please don't forget what you're fighting for." I clicked off the loudspeaker."
"That's good stuff Squall," Irvine smiled.
"It sounds like you never stop being general," Quistis told me.
"Maybe in my heart I never did," I told her. I then turned to Nida, the Balamb pilot, who was standing there waiting. "Set course for the Galbadia garden." I commanded.
* * * * *
The garden was set for defense and even though Balamb had yet to show any signs of attacking I knew it be best if we where ready. The Galbadian garden was displeased with me for attacking Balamb in the first place. My political status was going down fast. The only comforting thought I had at the moment was knowing that Rinoa was at the palace waiting for me.
Through my own thoughts I heard my pilot yell.
"There coming!"
I quickly clicked on the loudspeaker. "Battle stations everyone!" I shouted over the loudspeaker before turning it off. I hung on to a rail as Balamb garden collided with us.
* * * * *
We crashed directly into Galbadia "Again!" I yelled to Nida, who did just that. This time the collision left an opening in the Galbadian garden.
"Come on!" I yelled to my friends waving my gunblade, with them following we charged to the Galbadian garden. Gaining crowds of Balamb SeeD's as we ran.
Through the Galbadian's we went with our resentment and determination leading the way.
When we arrived in their garden Irvine joked "Haven't we done this before?"
Ignoring Irvine's comment we moved further into the garden managing the Galbadians that dared go cross our path. I didn't know what the others where looking for, but there was only one destination for me, Seifer. It wasn't long before I met that destination.
"Oh it's so heart warming to see you all together again.wait a minute. no I lied it really isn't all that heart warming." We had met Seifer and he looked just as resentful and determined as us.
"This is where your guy's reunion is going to end," Seifer says as he lifts up his gunblade releasing it with full force towards my head. With a clash his gunblade collided with mine.
As everyone gathered around Seifer with their weapons out Seifer snarls.
"What don't have enough balls to take me on alone Squall?"
I waved with my hand for everyone to back off, which they all did. Turning to Seifer I say.
"Hope you're ready to dance Seifer?"
"The only dancing I'm going to be doing is dancing away with Rinoa." At Seifer's reply I go for the strike which Seifer easily defended.
"Squall did you honestly think Rinoa was going to pick you?" Not saying anything I striked again.
"Squall you old-boy, why would you want to be with Rinoa? You're not exactly a people person and you're nothing alike." I striked again several more times before I answered.
"Because I love her," Seifer stared at me and I stared back as Seifer was catching his breathe.
"How dare you." Seifer finally said going on a rampage against me. Strike after strike all in which I defended. When Seifer stopped to catch his breathe I asked.
"Do you love her Seifer?"
Seifer glaring at me says "I'm not answering to you Squall." At Seifer's last words I threw down my gunblade. Everyone, including Seifer looks at me with disbelief.
"What the hell do you think your doing?" Seifer asked to astonished to strike.
"Seifer, I'm realizing that what it comes down to for me is I just want her to be happy." Seifer takes a moment before answering.
"She's not going to be happy with me. I was never who she wanted to be with, but I really don't give a damn about what she wants. I know what I want and the only thing getting in the way of what I want is you!" Seifer goes for another strike for what I thought would be my final blow when Zell jumps up taking in the stomach Seifer's gunblade.
"NOOOO!!!" I yelled catching Zell as he was falling to the ground. Seifer pulled back his gunblade watching the blood drip from it. I looked down at Zell who was trying to keep his eyes open. Desperately I say to Zell.
"Hang on buddy we'll get you back to the garden and everything will be alright."
"Squall," I felt Zell grab my arm with all his remaining strength "I'm glad you came back." After that I watch as Zell's eyes flutter open and close until they where just closed...
"Zell...Zell buddy, come on." Zell wasn't responding he wasn't dead, but just barely hanging on. I hear Selphie's crying and looked to see the tears rolling down Quistis and Irvine's faces they where the tears of almost losing a friend. I then shot a look at Seifer. I didn't know what I was expecting remorse, tears, angry., but never even from Seifer did I expect what I saw. Seifer was smiling. Seifer catching my stare locked his eyes on mine and with a laugh said.
"Looks like the chicken-wuss met the ends I always knew he would.death by my blade." At Seifer's words at once Quistis, Selphie and Irvine all lounged for Seifer, but I caught them all. Picking back up my gunblade I said to them.
"This is my war let me finish it!" They all dutifully back off, but I missed my chance by now Galbadian SeeDs where gathering. Seifer begins to walk away shouting back at us.
"I'll be catchin you guys later!" I ran after him only to have dozens of Galbadians pushing me back. We fought through them, but it was too late Seifer was no where to be found.
"Dammit!!!" I yelled and punched the wall. I began to shake uncontrollable. I was suppressed with so many emotions at the moment that I couldn't control it any longer. It took Quistis' guiding hand on my shoulder to control my madness.
"Squall, come on lets go home."
"But, but Seifer he"- I started, but was cut off by Quistis.
"Seifer will be taken care of, but now there's other things to take care of, like Zell." I throw my head down and nod.
"Let's take care of that," I said running back to Zell.
* * * * *
Upon arriving at Balamb I had a terrible feeling which only worsened as I drew closer to the garden. I walked in the garden to find it in suddle turmoil. It wasn't chaos, but everyone that I had seen seemed to be lost. Right away I knew what must have happened, but I still hoped that it wasn't the case.
Walking a little further I literally ran into Quistis. She also had that lost look on her face, but she also seemed to be carrying a level of anger and sadness that all the people around her where not. With us both stopped in front of each other I asked.
"Quistis what's wrong?"
There's something about you Rinoa Heartilly," was Quistis' reply.
I gave her a queer look "What are you talking about Quistis?"
"Things just sort of happen to you and you just shrug it off not caring about who you might actually be shrugging off."
"Quistis please," I was confused and a little hurt by what she was saying. Quistis loosing it yells at me.
"What the hell are you even doing here Rinoa!?" You don't belong here?"
Stepping back from her I gain enough composure to ask "Do you know where I can find Squall?" Quistis giving me a sharp glare tells me.
"He's probably in the infirmary."
Her words terrified me "Infirmary?" I asked "What happened, is he alright?" I was holding my breathe waiting for Quistis' answer.
"Oh come off it Rinoa you know it doesn't matter one way or another to you." I gave Quistis a pained look. Why was she saying these things? Unmercifully Quistis continued to talk "Just get the hell out of my face!"
Without another thought towards Quistis I ran to the infirmary with my heart in my throat, if anything happened to Squall.The thought was simply unbearable.
In entering the infirmary I let out a breathe of relief, there Squall was leaning over a bed, he was alright. Stepping closer he still hadn't noticed me, but I did notice who was in the bed.it was Zell. I gasped causing Squall to turn around towards me. I thought Quistis looked lost, angry and sad, but Squall looked all those things ten times over.
"Squall," I cried but he turned away from me "Squall," I repeated on the verge of tears.
"What are you doing here Rinoa?" Squall asked all the tenderness that usually filled his voice was gone.
"Squall, I had to see you,"
"Me.? Me.?" My words seemed to bring him to a form of hysteria "Look at Zell!" he demanded "I don't matter."
"But you do Squall that's the whole point." I ran over to him kneeling down "Squall I came here to tell you I need you. I can't keep going anymore without you." I looked hopefully up at his grayish blue eyes.
"Don't be ridiculous Rinoa," was all Squall said. His words made my heart clench.
"Ridiculous? How can you say our love is Ridiculous?" I cried appalled. Squall stood there silently looking at Zell.
"Well say something dammit!" I cried once again not able to take his silence any longer.
Squall looking directly at me says "The most ridiculous thing that you ever said was calling what we had love. How can love bring so much pain?"
I couldn't believe what he was saying. "You can't mean that?" I asked tears where starting to roll down my cheeks, but I didn't care. Squall merely stood there.
"Squall," I begged, now almost drowning in my own tears.
"Rinoa, I think you better go."
"I guess I should!" I cried storming out of the infirmary. I ran and ran after that. I ran from Squall, I ran from the garden and I ran from the pain. I ran to Seifer.