Carlos sat in the leather armchair. He was settling in for his normal night of depression. He brought the bottle of jack Daniel's to his lips and drank. The liquid burned his throat as it went down. He stared at the TV screen. Nothing was on. Ty walked in and stared at his partner.
"What's going on with you?" He asked. Carlos put the bottle down.
"I regret it everyday." He slurred. Ty shook his head. Carlos had certainly had too much to drink.
"Come on, Man." He helped him to his feet.
"I just want to hold her again." Carlos groaned stumbling to his room.
"You can tomorrow." Ty said. Carlos shook his head as he fell upon the bed.
"I can't." He moaned, "I can never hold her again, Ty. I love her so much."
"You love them all don't you?" Ty asked taking his roommates shoes off.
"She has such gorgeous eyes…So big." He said. Ty nodded putting the blanket over him. "Her hair was so silky and her skin was so smooth. Her smile, Ty, oh man her smile was so beautiful."
"Right." Ty said, "Sleep this off, Carlos."
* * *
The sun spilled over Carlos' eyes. He groaned loudly. His head felt like it had been hit with a sledgehammer several times. He pulled himself out of the bed and shuffled to the kitchen.
"Hey." Ty chuckled pouring him a mug of coffee, "Good morning."
"Yeah." Carlos grunted taking the coffee.
"She must have been something to have done that to you?" Ty said.
"What?" Carlos looked at him confused.
"Last night you were going on an don about this girl." Ty said, "You seemed pretty upset about her leaving."
"Oh." Carlos started to remember, "Yeah, well she was great." Ty nodded.
"Well, you can always find another one. Woman stick to you as if you're fly paper." He said. Carlos smiled softly as he sipped the strong coffee.
"Yeah I suppose." He said.
"Do you even remember her?" Ty asked.
"Yeah I do and I don't wish to discuss it." Carlos said slugging down the coffee as fast as he could. Ty threw up his hands.
"All right. Just keep it bottled up and drink yourself into another drunken stupor."
"Sounds fine to me." Carlos said.
* * *
The cool crisp autumn air swirled around Carlos as he walked down Main Street. The brown leaves crunched beneath his feet. He shoved his hand into his pockets. He didn't know why he was feeling like this. He didn't know why he was walking down this street. He should just turn around, but he couldn't.
Carlos stopped in front of a house. He could hear children laughing in the back yard. He looked to the back and saw two girls. A giant smile broke out on his face. Kylie. Her hair was getting long, but it was still curly and brown. She was getting big. She was walking. She was playing with a large red ball. Carlos' heart thumped in his chest. There was his baby girl.
She was wearing a red sweater that was keeping her warm from the cool air. Her little cheeks had a rosy tint to them. Her laughter hit Carlos like a ton of bricks. She had the most gorgeous laugh.
"Carlos?" He looked up to see Mrs. Kennedy stepping out onto the porch.
"I um...w-was just walking by and...Saw her." He said. She smiled softly.
"Would you like to come in for a few minutes?" She asked. Carlos stared at her. She was asking him in. She was letting him see his baby girl. Carlos nodded slowly. "Come on in then." Carlos nervously walked up the stairs and into their perfect home. Pictures of "their" children were everywhere. He sighed deeply.
Carlos steeped outside. He watched Kylie kick a ball. Her wobbly legs kicked it far. He smiled softly and sat down on the steps. Her large brown eyes turned to Carlos. His heart thumped in his chest.
"Kylie, come here." Mrs. Kennedy took the baby's hand and slowly walked her over to Carlos; "This is your biological daddy. I'm sure you remember him huh?" Kylie giggled at Carlos.
"Hi." Carlos said running his hand over the baby's head. She grinned revealing a new tooth. "Do you remember me?"
"Kit." Kylie said showing Carlos a stuffed cat toy.
"Yeah. It's a kitty." He smiled at her. She put it on his lap and started to meow. Carlos laughed. "That's right. Kitty's go meow." He couldn't believe how big she had gotten these past months. She was walking and talking.
"We tell her about you." Mrs. Kennedy said.
"You do?" He asked. She nodded.
"She knows, well she knows as much as a one year old can about you and that she was adopted. We don't hide it from her." She said. Carlos smiled gratefully.
"That means a lot to me." He said.
"You gave her to us, but you are still her biological father." She said.
"Thank you." Carlos whispered pushing Kylie's curls away from her face. "She's getting so beautiful."
"Yeah she is." She smiled. Carlos watched at Kylie ran away to finish playing. His heart pounded in his chest he just wanted to take that child and run. That was HIS daughter. No one else's. It took so much for him to say 'You gave the Kennedy's a gift. You did the right thing.' There were so many regrets he had for doing this. He knew this was the best life for Kylie but he couldn't help to think that she would learn the value of a dollar, she would have known good things come after hard work if she lived with him. Carlos stood up with a sigh.
"I should get going." He mumbled softly.
"Are you sure?" She asked.
"Yes. I have work soon." Carlos walked back through the house and to the front porch. "Thanks for letting me see her."
"No problem." She smiled softly. Carlos smiled at her. "Take care, Carlos."
"Yeah. Bye." Carlos waved and walked away. Once again, he was leaving his baby girl with them instead of taking her with him. Carlos sighed deeply. He couldn't turn back now. Could he?