Disclaimer: I disclaim this.
Author's Note: First and foremost, Woman, you may not continue this. Secondly, this doesn't really fall under the heading of romance. It's a friendship fic between Bulma and Vegeta.
I hate mornings. I hate winter. The two together are Hell.
I was sleeping peacefully after the day of training I'd had the day before. That is, until I was hit by a noise louder than a billion voices crying out in pain.
Believe me. I know. I've heard a billion voices crying out in pain.
It knocked me out of my bed. Dumbly, I looked around the room until I realised exactly what it was. The Woman was wailing about something. And breakfast was done.
This was the deciding factor in my examining the noise. She sat at the table, head in her arms, sobbing like a child. "What the Hell are you whining about, Woman?"
She lifted her head up long enough to glare at me through tear filled eyes, then put her head back down. "Yamcha… he…" The rest was lost in another wave of sobbing. As if I cared.
I sat down across from her, helping myself to eggs, bacon, cereal, toast, Pop Tarts, bagels, donuts, sausage, oatmeal, milk, and orange juice. It was a light breakfast.
As I ate, I looked at the Woman again, who was still sobbing, though more softly at this point. She's in no condition to work on the gravity room, I thought. Wait, why did I think that? It was just that her mind wasn't able to focus on the tiny details, that was it.
Against my better judgement, I again asked her, "What is wrong with you?"
This time, she was able to answer me, sniffing occasionally. "Yamcha was going to take me ice skating today, and he cancelled on me! He's probably with some bimbo," she added angrily.
For some reason, I felt the need to reassure her. Maybe she would be able to work on my gravity room after all. "Woman, consider getting yourself a decent mate. There must be something on this mudball that would do better than your Weakling." For some reason, this sent her back into sobbing. Last time I try to help.
This is why I hate winter. The Weakling and all his pathetic attempts at romance with the Woman, which usually end up either failing or hurting my eardrums. This one was doing both. "What is wrong now, Woman?"
She smacked my chest weakly. "You. He's… not… stupid…" she sobbed.
"I didn't say he was." With that, she stopped crying, though she was sniffing.
"Stupid Yamcha," she spat. I raised an eyebrow. "You're right, he is stupid," she added.
"Woman, I never said he—" I tried to object, but she would hear none of it.
"I'm not going to let him ruin my plans!" she exclaimed. Her tirade was rather entertaining, so I let her continue as I munched on a piece of toast. The Weakling was in for a lot of pain. "I'll go skating! I'll build a snowman! If he doesn't realise that he has a beautiful woman to take care of, he can just go straight to Hell!"
"Lovely for you, Woman," I said without emotion. She turned her head to me, as if just realising I was still there. Her eyes grew large, and I knew she was planning something.
"Would you come with me?" she asked softly, which was rather out of character for her. Normally, she did something to the effect of grabbing me by the ear and yelling "You're coming with me or you'll never eat again!"
"You've got to be kidding, Woman," I smirked. "I don't do snow."
"Please, Vegeta?" she practically begged. "I don't want to go alone, and it's too cold for you to train, and you can't spar with Goku since he's out with Chi-Chi today… please?"
I don't know what came over me. To this day I don't know why I said it. Maybe it was pity, maybe it was my light breakfast, maybe it was the fact that I couldn't train anyway, but the next two words I said came of their own accord. "Fine, Woman."
She smiled wider than I would have expected, even for a chance outing with the Prince of all Saiyans. I don't think she expected me to say yes. For that matter, neither did I.
~*~
Planet Vegeta was very rarely cold. Neither was Frieza's ship, for that matter. He always kept it at the same temperature. Some of the planets I've attacked have been cold, but they were heated quickly enough with the burning buildings and the destruction and chaos and whatnot. The point is, I was never anywhere long enough to be cold.
I hate cold. Winter is cold. Therefore, I hate winter. And I was going out into it with a loud, hyper, and very excited woman.
"Isn't it beautiful, Vegeta?" the Woman asked rhetorically as she danced in the snow on the way to the "skating rink". As she explained it, humans attach very sharp blades to their feet and move as fast as they can on a frictionless and freezing sheet of ice.
"Beautiful?" I sneered. Tiny frozen bits of rain: that's snow was to me. "It's dangerous and cold."
"Oh, come on, Vegeta," she said cheerfully. "Lighten up."
"The Prince of all Saiyans does not 'lighten up,'" I informed her. "I will accompany you, I will 'skate', and I will no doubt detest it." She merely rolled her eyes at me.
We arrived at this "rink" rather quickly, considering the Woman was dancing the whole way there. "Come on, Vegeta, we need to get skates," she said, grabbing my arm and dragging me to a booth near the ice.
"We'd like to rent some skates, please," she told the human behind the counter. "Size six for me."
"Okay then. What about you, sir?" he asked me.
"What about me?" I snapped. This human annoyed me.
"What's your shoe size?" he asked again, oblivious to the fact that he was on thin ice. No pun intended.
"My what? Here," I said, placing my boot on the counter. "Just give me some of those size."
He eyed it, then me, then turned around and grabbed a pair from a shelf marked "13". "Here you are, sir, and have fun!" he said cheerily. I glared at him and snorted.
The Woman already had her skates on when I sat next to her. She explained to me the laces, as if I wouldn't have had them on without any trouble.
Soon we were on the ice. I watched as the humans went around and around pointlessly while I stood there motionless. "I'm not moving, Woman," I said. "That weakling gave me inferior skates. I will destroy him." I started to hover so I could get off of the ice, but the Woman stopped me.
"You don't just slide on them, Vegeta," she stated calmly. "You have to skate."
I glared at her. "That's really helpful," I said sarcastically.
"Well I don't know how else to describe it!" she snapped. "Now, do like me." With those words, she moved effortlessly around me. I repeated the motions she'd done as best I could, and I was soon moving, though somewhat awkwardly.
"This is idiotic!" I spat. "There's no point to it. I'm leaving."
"Fine, Vegeta," she replied. "If you can't do it, you can go."
"I can do it!" I retorted. How dare she insinuate that I couldn't do something any human could do? "I can do it better and faster than you ever could!"
"Of course you can, Vegeta," she said patronisingly.
"I can!" I nearly yelled. I'll show her, I thought. The Prince of all Saiyans will not be defeated at anything by some pathetic humans.
I mimicked the moves the Woman was doing exactly. I was able to do it on my own soon enough, quicker than the rest. I barely heard the song that was playing as I rushed around the rink. Suddenly, I realised something. "Woman! How do you stop?!" I cried. Before she could answer, the wall answered for her.
I hate winter.
~*~
"I'm sorry, Vegeta!" the Woman told me again as we walked back to the Capsule Corporation. It was almost lunchtime, and my stomach was roaring.
"Whatever, Woman, I don't care," I repeated for the fifth time since leaving the rink. "I'll just get stronger from it." As the dome shaped building came into view, I walked a little bit ahead of her. That is, until I felt something wet and cold on the back of my head.
"Woman, what was—" Turning around, my face collided with a large ball of snow. "What are you doing?!" I yelled.
"Throwing snowballs," the Woman answered simply. She threw another at me, which I dodged. Though curious how she got past my guard twice, I wasn't about to let myself be defeated in this too.
"Kiss your ass goodbye, Woman," I said, grinning. I ducked down and scooped up a handful of snow before she could blink, and soon her own face was covered in the icy fluff.
~*~
I don't use this work a lot outside of combat, but our "snowball fight", as the Woman called it, was fun. I won, of course, but she put up a good fight.
For a human.
It was the first time that I missed a meal without having been fighting all day, though I more than made up for it at dinner.
"Vegeta, dear, you seem hungrier than usual," the older woman told me. I merely nodded and kept on eating. I think it was cow. "So do you, Bulma," she said to the Woman.
"Vegeta and I had a lot of fun today, didn't we, Vegeta?" the Woman said, taking another bite of her food. I stopped eating long enough to reply, "Indeed."
Maybe the Woman's not as bad as she makes herself out to be, I thought. One thing was clear now, though.
I love winter.