*A/N* I'm on a Pink kick, and I realize I haven't used songs in a while
sooooo...The songs Just Like a Pill, Numb, Eventually and Lonely Girl are
by Pink. (there's a first... I know the song titles...)
Out of the Darkness... You're Here With Me
The duke was forgotten for the rest of that morning. Or so Christian thought.
Satine kissed him passionately and they sunk onto the bed. He began leaving a trail of kisses from her ear to her collarbone, and she gasped, in what Christian assumed was pleasure. His hand climbed up her leg and under her robe. She stiffened, screamed and rolled off the bed.
Christian sat himself up, dazed, and his passion immediately forgotten. She never had any problems before... Even after she returned from the duke. She was the one who re-initiated their sexual relationship!
Satine curled herself up in a tight ball and rocked herself back and forth. Puppy-like whimpers emitted from her shaking body. Christian couldn't understand why.
"Please don't hurt me... I'm sorry... Please don't..."
She thought he was going to hurt her? Christian felt a pang of betrayal in their trust. But she hadn't acted this way before... What was going on?
"No sleep, no sex, for you from you ex-girlfriend
I was too deep, can't let you come and just jump in.
At times I would, push my feelings aside to let you feel.
I'm novacaine,
I'm numb and nothings real...
Like the coldest winter
I am frozen from you..." Satine whispered-sang from her fetal position on the floor.
She wasn't ready, Christian suddenly realized. But she started it... so she did it for him? He didn't understand.
"I lay there quiet
And watched you have your way with me.
I might have cried
But the tears were silent inside you see..."
Christian felt like a bucket of ice water was dumped on his head. She hadn't fought back for the duke, why would she for him? She wasn't ready, and he took advantage of it... She felt like he raped her.
Tiny beetles began crawling up his arms, under his skin, filling his body with black mucus. He felt sick. His ears were ringing painfully; he was dizzy. Like a far away echo, he heard Satine's voice again.
"I was weak before
Now you've made me so numb I can't feel much for you anymore..."
"She hates me..." he thought, disgusted with himself. He tried to scratch the beetles off. They didn't budge, but instead clouded his vision. He felt himself fall to the ground. "What have I done?"
He had to find a way to make Satine understand that he didn't know... "I didn't know..." he heard himself say. His voice sounded strange to his ears.
Christian's hand reached a round, metallic button; his typewriter. She needed to know. He couldn't speak. He typed a few scrambled letters. He couldn't see; the bugs were crawling all over his eyes. He couldn't hear her sing; the bugs were crawling out of his ears.
"Where I can run..." he tentatively tried to type. His heard hurt too much to think clearly. "To the fastest I can, to the middle of nowhere, to the middle of my frustrated fears..."
"I'm crying here, what have you done? I thought it would be fun..." he heard Satine sing. Black tears rolled down his cheeks.
"I didn't know the price," he typed. "So what good am I to you?" The words were coming faster and faster. His fingers could barely keep up. "Staring at the cracks in the wall, 'cause I'm waiting for it all, to come to an end. Nothing is ever enough... Ooh baby it ain't enough..."
When was it all going to end? Christian was at the end of his ropes. He didn't know what to do anymore, or what she wanted him to do. He didn't realize he was still typing. His fingers were burning. He slid off the chair he didn't realize he was on. Satine was still crying in a corner. It was more than he could take.
Christian imitated her position and held his head in his hands. The tears he was holding in fell like rain from the sky. They both cried themselves to sleep.
*A/N* This is for Mariclaire, who reminded me of an extra chapter I wanted to write but got lazy (basically, this one). So thanks! And hopefully this will make more sense to everyone.
Out of the Darkness... You're Here With Me
The duke was forgotten for the rest of that morning. Or so Christian thought.
Satine kissed him passionately and they sunk onto the bed. He began leaving a trail of kisses from her ear to her collarbone, and she gasped, in what Christian assumed was pleasure. His hand climbed up her leg and under her robe. She stiffened, screamed and rolled off the bed.
Christian sat himself up, dazed, and his passion immediately forgotten. She never had any problems before... Even after she returned from the duke. She was the one who re-initiated their sexual relationship!
Satine curled herself up in a tight ball and rocked herself back and forth. Puppy-like whimpers emitted from her shaking body. Christian couldn't understand why.
"Please don't hurt me... I'm sorry... Please don't..."
She thought he was going to hurt her? Christian felt a pang of betrayal in their trust. But she hadn't acted this way before... What was going on?
"No sleep, no sex, for you from you ex-girlfriend
I was too deep, can't let you come and just jump in.
At times I would, push my feelings aside to let you feel.
I'm novacaine,
I'm numb and nothings real...
Like the coldest winter
I am frozen from you..." Satine whispered-sang from her fetal position on the floor.
She wasn't ready, Christian suddenly realized. But she started it... so she did it for him? He didn't understand.
"I lay there quiet
And watched you have your way with me.
I might have cried
But the tears were silent inside you see..."
Christian felt like a bucket of ice water was dumped on his head. She hadn't fought back for the duke, why would she for him? She wasn't ready, and he took advantage of it... She felt like he raped her.
Tiny beetles began crawling up his arms, under his skin, filling his body with black mucus. He felt sick. His ears were ringing painfully; he was dizzy. Like a far away echo, he heard Satine's voice again.
"I was weak before
Now you've made me so numb I can't feel much for you anymore..."
"She hates me..." he thought, disgusted with himself. He tried to scratch the beetles off. They didn't budge, but instead clouded his vision. He felt himself fall to the ground. "What have I done?"
He had to find a way to make Satine understand that he didn't know... "I didn't know..." he heard himself say. His voice sounded strange to his ears.
Christian's hand reached a round, metallic button; his typewriter. She needed to know. He couldn't speak. He typed a few scrambled letters. He couldn't see; the bugs were crawling all over his eyes. He couldn't hear her sing; the bugs were crawling out of his ears.
"Where I can run..." he tentatively tried to type. His heard hurt too much to think clearly. "To the fastest I can, to the middle of nowhere, to the middle of my frustrated fears..."
"I'm crying here, what have you done? I thought it would be fun..." he heard Satine sing. Black tears rolled down his cheeks.
"I didn't know the price," he typed. "So what good am I to you?" The words were coming faster and faster. His fingers could barely keep up. "Staring at the cracks in the wall, 'cause I'm waiting for it all, to come to an end. Nothing is ever enough... Ooh baby it ain't enough..."
When was it all going to end? Christian was at the end of his ropes. He didn't know what to do anymore, or what she wanted him to do. He didn't realize he was still typing. His fingers were burning. He slid off the chair he didn't realize he was on. Satine was still crying in a corner. It was more than he could take.
Christian imitated her position and held his head in his hands. The tears he was holding in fell like rain from the sky. They both cried themselves to sleep.
*A/N* This is for Mariclaire, who reminded me of an extra chapter I wanted to write but got lazy (basically, this one). So thanks! And hopefully this will make more sense to everyone.