Disclaimer: is my name Joss? I think not.
A/N: In reply to reviewers:
I mentioned I have only seen every second episode of the first series. I have absolutely no idea who Fred is, and have only seen Gunn once. So it would be sort of difficult for me to write about them. If any kind person would like to send me some history on the aforementioned characters, I would be happy to oblige and put them in the story. I'd also like to know about this Lorne chap, too. (I've got the general gist of things from the fics I read, but some confirmation so I don't write the wrong things would help).
Anya's there. As far as I'm concerned, she comes under the heading of 'Scoobies'. Just because I didn't mention her by name. Didn't mention Xander, either. Maybe he's not there. Maybe they all ran away. These characters just can't be trusted.
Of course it's rushed. I'm an impatient person.
Crude and bad language, yep, that sounds about right. Welcome to the world of 'deranged teen who is obsessed with writing and keeps on saying fudge'.
You people like my story? You really do? Yay!!! **hugs to all her reviewers** I love you all! Except people who don't like it, but that's beside the point. I'm writing this one because I feel like it, and it's fun, which is why I write most of my stories, come to think of it. So it's nice to hear someone else enjoys it as much as I do.
Babyshowers at the Hellmouth
Chapter Two
"So, you and Cordy are married." Xander said to Angel. They were all clustered around in the living room, various people making various chitchattiness.
"Yes." Angel said, watching the aforementioned spouse, who sat with Dawn in the kitchen. (He was watching through the open doorway, clearly.)
"Don't...you know, hurt her or anything." Xander coughed.
"I won't."
"Er...yeah, good."
Cordy and Dawn were in the kitchen. Dawn sat on the bench, and Cordy was leaning on said bench while she waited for the microwave to finish heating up Angel's blood-with-cinnamon. Cordy was telling stories about what things they did in LA, and Dawn was listening avidly, giggling and ahh-ing in all the right places.
"What does Angel look like in the morning? Or, evening, whatever. You know, when he's just got up. Tell me, Cordy, do vampire's have morning breath?" Dawn asked with mock-seriousness in her tone.
The dark-haired mother-to-be sniggered. "Dragon breath." She confirmed. "And in the morning, I would say he looks great, but I'm biased. An objective observer would say he looks like anyone who has had their sleep interrupted constantly by their wife's odd cravings."
"Odd cravings?"
"Ketchup, mayo, and fries at 2 in the morning."
"Whoa. He actually goes out and gets them?"
"You bet your a--behind he does." She nodded.
"So, Spike invited you guys to Sunnyhell?"
"Yes he did. I personally think he's just trying to stir up trouble - Buffy can't be enjoying this much - but who was I to say know? Bump's gonna know her Uncle Spike, you know."
"Bump?"
"We haven't thought about a name yet. Angel still thinks she's gonna be a boy, but who is the seer in this family? Momma knows best."
"Dawn's a good name."
"Can you imagine if we named her Buffy?"
There was a long silence.
"Let's not and say we did." Dawn suggested.
"I'm all for that. Got any other name ideas?"
"How about...Odette?"
"Too Swan Lake. Odile's a cool name, but Odette was a bit...overly perfect."
"Guess so." Dawn racked her brains for a good name to suggest. She wanted to impress Cordy, because Cordy was cool, and nice, and Angel's wife. And Cordy didn't see her and think 'Hey look, key to hell'. "Antonina?"
"I like that one. Toni or Nina for short. It's a good name." Cordy approved. Dawn glowed. "I'll put it top of the list when me and Angel start picking." She promised.
"Cool!"
Anya had worried a little bit about Xander seeing his ex - and, in truth, about her seeing his ex. It had been Cordelia's wish against Xander that had brought her here. But all her doubts were cast away when she saw the way Xander looked at aforementioned ex - just friendly. And Cordy responded in kind, glowing with happiness in her new family. Cordelia Liam was happy with what she had, she wasn't after what was Anya's.
She smiled to herself.
"So, poof's gone and found himself a wife." Spike commented to his grandsire, after Xander had wandered off to see Anya.
Again with the growling. Spike backed off a bit.
"Calm it down, Granpa. I'm not after her."
"Did you want something, Spike?"
"Well...I never did give you and the cheerleader a wedding present..." Spike shifted uncomfortably.
Angel stared incredulously. "You're getting us a wedding present?"
"Well, not exactly for you. More for the bit-to-be. Cheerleader's talking baby names with the Nibblet, you know. I thought the wee bit could use a decent cradle, and maybe something to...y'know, treasure in the later years and all that crap."
"Cordy's going to be stunned."
"Probably. I've already got it, too, so you can't say no. It's not like there's anyone else about with a baby."
"Right."
"I get to show your missus first, though," Spike added. "Once she's said yea or nay, then you see it."
"Whatever you say, Spike."
"And you don't tell the nibblet my poofy name, either."
"What, William?"
"That's the one. How many poofy names you think I have, anyway? Don't you go waving it around."
"Your secret's safe with me, provided you don't tell Cordy that her decision to use my old first name as our last name is a bit...odd."
Spike sniggered.
When at last it was time to say goodbyes - Buffy had to patrol, Angel was going to patrol out of habit, Spike had gotten bored and it was getting late - Cordy was hugging people.
People? She was hugging anyone who in arms-length and held still long enough.
Angel was told it was her hormones, all over the place, she was really emotional. But it was still unnerving for Buffy, he knew, when she hugged her whenever she went past.
"Cordy?" Angel whispered as he slipped back inside their hotel room later that night. Much later.
"You're late." She accused, sitting up instantly. "You said you'd be back by an hour ago."
"I got held up."
"Could have called me."
"With what?"
"Your cellphone, dumbass. Unless your ass is staked - and I reserve that right for me and me alone if you go Angelus on us - you can still call me."
"Yes, dear."
"Don't 'Yes, dear' me, Angel Liam. I'm going back to sleep."
And with that, she was out like a light. Angel sighed. It was going to be a long three months.
***
Okay, in the next chapter I'll bring in some ass-kicking and demons and crap like that. And call Angel a dumbass a few more times. And maybe with the Buffy bashing. If you hadn't noticed yet, I hate the little blonde slayer. If I get my hands on Spike, rest assured I will get my foot to his groin while lecturing him about the little necrophiliac slayer. (Really bad joke I found in a fanfic recently. Kinda true, too. Sick but true.)
Also, she called her self Mrs Angel but Ms Liam because I am contrary.
A/N: In reply to reviewers:
I mentioned I have only seen every second episode of the first series. I have absolutely no idea who Fred is, and have only seen Gunn once. So it would be sort of difficult for me to write about them. If any kind person would like to send me some history on the aforementioned characters, I would be happy to oblige and put them in the story. I'd also like to know about this Lorne chap, too. (I've got the general gist of things from the fics I read, but some confirmation so I don't write the wrong things would help).
Anya's there. As far as I'm concerned, she comes under the heading of 'Scoobies'. Just because I didn't mention her by name. Didn't mention Xander, either. Maybe he's not there. Maybe they all ran away. These characters just can't be trusted.
Of course it's rushed. I'm an impatient person.
Crude and bad language, yep, that sounds about right. Welcome to the world of 'deranged teen who is obsessed with writing and keeps on saying fudge'.
You people like my story? You really do? Yay!!! **hugs to all her reviewers** I love you all! Except people who don't like it, but that's beside the point. I'm writing this one because I feel like it, and it's fun, which is why I write most of my stories, come to think of it. So it's nice to hear someone else enjoys it as much as I do.
Babyshowers at the Hellmouth
Chapter Two
"So, you and Cordy are married." Xander said to Angel. They were all clustered around in the living room, various people making various chitchattiness.
"Yes." Angel said, watching the aforementioned spouse, who sat with Dawn in the kitchen. (He was watching through the open doorway, clearly.)
"Don't...you know, hurt her or anything." Xander coughed.
"I won't."
"Er...yeah, good."
Cordy and Dawn were in the kitchen. Dawn sat on the bench, and Cordy was leaning on said bench while she waited for the microwave to finish heating up Angel's blood-with-cinnamon. Cordy was telling stories about what things they did in LA, and Dawn was listening avidly, giggling and ahh-ing in all the right places.
"What does Angel look like in the morning? Or, evening, whatever. You know, when he's just got up. Tell me, Cordy, do vampire's have morning breath?" Dawn asked with mock-seriousness in her tone.
The dark-haired mother-to-be sniggered. "Dragon breath." She confirmed. "And in the morning, I would say he looks great, but I'm biased. An objective observer would say he looks like anyone who has had their sleep interrupted constantly by their wife's odd cravings."
"Odd cravings?"
"Ketchup, mayo, and fries at 2 in the morning."
"Whoa. He actually goes out and gets them?"
"You bet your a--behind he does." She nodded.
"So, Spike invited you guys to Sunnyhell?"
"Yes he did. I personally think he's just trying to stir up trouble - Buffy can't be enjoying this much - but who was I to say know? Bump's gonna know her Uncle Spike, you know."
"Bump?"
"We haven't thought about a name yet. Angel still thinks she's gonna be a boy, but who is the seer in this family? Momma knows best."
"Dawn's a good name."
"Can you imagine if we named her Buffy?"
There was a long silence.
"Let's not and say we did." Dawn suggested.
"I'm all for that. Got any other name ideas?"
"How about...Odette?"
"Too Swan Lake. Odile's a cool name, but Odette was a bit...overly perfect."
"Guess so." Dawn racked her brains for a good name to suggest. She wanted to impress Cordy, because Cordy was cool, and nice, and Angel's wife. And Cordy didn't see her and think 'Hey look, key to hell'. "Antonina?"
"I like that one. Toni or Nina for short. It's a good name." Cordy approved. Dawn glowed. "I'll put it top of the list when me and Angel start picking." She promised.
"Cool!"
Anya had worried a little bit about Xander seeing his ex - and, in truth, about her seeing his ex. It had been Cordelia's wish against Xander that had brought her here. But all her doubts were cast away when she saw the way Xander looked at aforementioned ex - just friendly. And Cordy responded in kind, glowing with happiness in her new family. Cordelia Liam was happy with what she had, she wasn't after what was Anya's.
She smiled to herself.
"So, poof's gone and found himself a wife." Spike commented to his grandsire, after Xander had wandered off to see Anya.
Again with the growling. Spike backed off a bit.
"Calm it down, Granpa. I'm not after her."
"Did you want something, Spike?"
"Well...I never did give you and the cheerleader a wedding present..." Spike shifted uncomfortably.
Angel stared incredulously. "You're getting us a wedding present?"
"Well, not exactly for you. More for the bit-to-be. Cheerleader's talking baby names with the Nibblet, you know. I thought the wee bit could use a decent cradle, and maybe something to...y'know, treasure in the later years and all that crap."
"Cordy's going to be stunned."
"Probably. I've already got it, too, so you can't say no. It's not like there's anyone else about with a baby."
"Right."
"I get to show your missus first, though," Spike added. "Once she's said yea or nay, then you see it."
"Whatever you say, Spike."
"And you don't tell the nibblet my poofy name, either."
"What, William?"
"That's the one. How many poofy names you think I have, anyway? Don't you go waving it around."
"Your secret's safe with me, provided you don't tell Cordy that her decision to use my old first name as our last name is a bit...odd."
Spike sniggered.
When at last it was time to say goodbyes - Buffy had to patrol, Angel was going to patrol out of habit, Spike had gotten bored and it was getting late - Cordy was hugging people.
People? She was hugging anyone who in arms-length and held still long enough.
Angel was told it was her hormones, all over the place, she was really emotional. But it was still unnerving for Buffy, he knew, when she hugged her whenever she went past.
"Cordy?" Angel whispered as he slipped back inside their hotel room later that night. Much later.
"You're late." She accused, sitting up instantly. "You said you'd be back by an hour ago."
"I got held up."
"Could have called me."
"With what?"
"Your cellphone, dumbass. Unless your ass is staked - and I reserve that right for me and me alone if you go Angelus on us - you can still call me."
"Yes, dear."
"Don't 'Yes, dear' me, Angel Liam. I'm going back to sleep."
And with that, she was out like a light. Angel sighed. It was going to be a long three months.
***
Okay, in the next chapter I'll bring in some ass-kicking and demons and crap like that. And call Angel a dumbass a few more times. And maybe with the Buffy bashing. If you hadn't noticed yet, I hate the little blonde slayer. If I get my hands on Spike, rest assured I will get my foot to his groin while lecturing him about the little necrophiliac slayer. (Really bad joke I found in a fanfic recently. Kinda true, too. Sick but true.)
Also, she called her self Mrs Angel but Ms Liam because I am contrary.