Disclaimer: Not mine. That`s right. Not mine.
***Hurray! This story`s actually doing good! Thank you so much, reviewers! On another note I changed the rating from PG to PG-13 cuz I decided that things might come up and I might get a little carried away. Anyways…don`t worry. It won`t get graphic or anything. I really just changed it to play it safe and not get flamed about that.
Chapter 4: Truth
A few days pass and I feel relieved that Knives has not asked about his past again. I really do dread the day when I have to. I won`t lie to him. I tell myself that all the time. I know that Vash wants me to because he wants Knives to remember who he really is. I don`t want him to.
Over the past few days we`ve talked a great deal. I find myself intrigued by him. I suppose that it amuses me that he can`t remember. I feel so strange around him yet I enjoy being around him. I don`t really know what to think about that. I have other things that need tending first.
I`m sitting beside Knives right now. We have been playing cards all day. He`s pretty good at it. He`s been doing very well. Now he can get up on his own and actually get to places by himself. He still needs help going up and down the porch steps. I`m always happy to help him out.
Another thing that I`ve noticed: My attitude is actually getting softer. I used to be…well…bitchy as Vash once put it. I don`t know what`s changing. Maybe it`s due to us living together. Maybe It`s Knives and his amnesia. Maybe it`s Vash who has been acting very strangely around me.
"Meryl! Meryl, where are you?"
`Speak of the devil.`
"What is it, Vash?" I ask aloud. Knives momentarily stops dealing cards.
"Come down here!"
"Do you want Knives down there too?"
"No! Come on! Hurry! You will not believe this!"
I smile at Knives. His face conveys confusion.
"I`m sorry, Knives, but I have to go see what Vash is so exicted about."
"Will you come back up here later?"
"Of course I will."
He nods. I hate his disappointment. I honestly hate to upset him. I run leave the room and make my way towards the front door. I see Vash. He looks so happy.
`What`s going on?`
As I get closer I find out why. Standing beside him acting as if nothing was wrong was Wolfwood. I can`t believe this. I didn`t think that he survived.
`Oh God…where is Millie at a time like this?`
"Long time no see." Wolfwood says. He acts as if he`s been with us the whole time. I circle him for a moment. He laughs.
"Hey stop it! You`re acting as if I`m some kind of ghost or something!"
"Can you blame me!" I exclaim "We thought that you were dead for a long time now! How…what….how are you here right now?"
"Long story. I`ll tell you later or Vash will tell you. Right now there is a certain pudding loving big girl that I have to greet."
He leaves the room in the direction that I point him to. I look up at Vash and cannot help but smile.
"This is so great! Millie can be happy again! I can`t think of anything else that could make this moment any better!"
He smiles at me. It`s a strange smile really. He actually looks happier than he ever has before. My smile falters as I notice this. I feel that odd sensation in my heart again. He places his hand on my shoulder.
`I want him to kiss me….where did that come from? I can`t still like the broom headed idiot…can I?`
Just one look into those green eyes and can feel my legs beginning to turn to jelly. He leans over slightly.
`Can it be? Is he going to…`
"Thank you very much for taking care of Knives today once again!" he exclaimed in a cheery voice. He kisses me on the cheek as he had recently become accustomed to doing. I sigh as he walks off.
`What did I really expect out of that? He only think of me as a friend…and I want it to stay that way!` I tell myself. I decide to go back upstairs with Knives. I need to go think and he usually gives me the courtesy of doing so. First I stop off in my room. I grab a brush and look at myself in the mirror.
`I look awful! I can`t see him like…no. Why am I thinking like that again?! Now it`s Knives…I need to get out more.`
I end up brushing my hair a little. I go to Knives` room. I open the door and nearly run into him. He apparently had been walking around the room. He jumps back until he notices that it`s me. He puts his hand over his chest and breaths out a long breath.
"You scared me!"
I feel my heart in my throat.
"Well you scared me! Sit back down! You`re still not in good enough condition to be walking around all the time!"
He nods in agreement. He gets back into bed. He looks pretty tired. I hand him a glass of water that I got out of the bathroom.
"Thank you."
"No need to say thanks. I don`t mind doing things for you."
He tilts his head and smiles.
`That sounded so lame.` I thought. I sit down on the edge of the bed. I`ve been sitting there lately. I`m not exactly sure when I started doing that.
"I know that I already asked but how do you feel today?" I ask.
"I feel pretty good. What did that guy…Vash…what did he want?"
I feel uneasy all of a sudden. I really didn`t want to talk about this.
"A friend of ours came back to us." I finally say "We thought that he was dead. His name is Nicholas D. Wolfwood. He`s a priest."
Knives smiles for a moment then it fades. I feel my heart pound.
`Please don`t remember anything.`
"That name sounds so familiar…" he says. His voice trails off. I find a temporary moment to hope that he would shrug it off but it was only in vain.
"Do you remember something?"
"I don`t know….am I supposed to remember something about him?"
`No! Why did I have to say his name? Now I`ll have to explain it to him…unless…`
He`s looking at me. He looks expectant and a little afraid. I really hate for him to look so upset. I put my hand on his arm. He looks at it strangely. I remove it quickly.
"Uh…no…you don`t have to remember him."
"Meryl…are you lying to me?"
His eyes are wide. He looks so much like an innocent boy…a large innocent boy. His blue eyes are pleading with me. They`re seeking truth that I must give him no matter how much it hurts.
`I have to live up to a promise. Here goes nothing…`
"Knives…the man downstairs…the reason we thought that he was dead…he was hurt by a man that was controlled by someone."
Knives takes it well until it begins to sink in.
"…It was me, wasn`t it?"
"Not exactly….well…we can`t be sure. There was another man. His name was Legato. We think that he was the one who forced the other man called Chapel to shoot him. They all worked for someone else who ordered this to be done. That man…that man was you. All together these guys and more worked for you. Wolfwood worked for you except he changed when he hung around Vash enough."
Knives turns his gaze down towards the end of the bed.
"Go on."
"I don`t think that I should. You…"
Something frightening happens to him. He suddenly glares at me with those eyes. Those icy blue eyes. I feel my heart beat against my ribcage. This time I am afraid.
"Tell me more…please."
After he says please his gaze softens back up. I feel a little better…but only a little. I think for a moments about what to tell him first. Nothing I think of will help how he`ll feel afterwards.
"The group that you headed was called the Gun-Ho Guns. I think that I need to start before that when you and Vash were one year old. This was before they decided to start a planet here after earth became unlivable. About one hundred and thirty or so years ago a woman named Rem saved you and Vash from…"
"One hundred and thirty or so years ago? But how can that be if I`m human?"
I did not count on this. I forgot that he had amnesia for a moment.
`He forgot what he is and how old he is….`
"Knives…you`re not human. You`re what is known as a plant. I can`t really tell you as much as Vash could but I`ll try. All I really know is that most plants are used for powering our cities."
"Do those plants die?"
"…Yes. After their energy is used they die."
"So humans use…my kind to power their cities then they die?"
I feel uneasy again. I nod. I turn my head away from his. I don`t want to see his reactions anymore.
"You and Vash resemble us of all of the plants. No one really knows why. I just know that you aged very rapidly when you were young but it slowed down when you and Vash were about 19 or 20 years old. You probably resembled how you are a little today."
"Tell me more about this Rem."
I suck in my breath. I told him about Rem and her teachings. I told him about how he began to see that humans caused a lot of their problems and that they used the plants for energy. He discovered that he began to manipulate minds and eventually had several people killed. He became unusually quiet when I mentioned how upset Vash was when Rem died. He only began speaking up again as I begin telling about how Vash decided that humans should not be all to blame.
"So we started fighting?" he asks. I can hear the pain in his voice. This is hurting him so much. I feel tears coming to my eyes as I continue.
"Yes. He ended up shooting you. You got so upset. He ended up running off with your gun. 17 years after that he locates the last living relative to Rem. He goes in…only to find that you killed him. I`m not sure what was said there but you…you shoot his arm off."
I look up once again. His eyes are large and round. They`re shaking. He glances at the door.
"So that`s why he has that arm…because I shot it off. Why did I do that?"
"You wanted your gun back."
"That`s the only reason?"
"…Yeah."
He nods at me then looks up at the ceiling. By the way that he was breathing I can tell that he may have some kind of breakdown at any moment.
"…I don`t know what happened to the arm. Maybe Vash can tell you. The rest that I know is that you started the Gun-Ho Guns in order to hurt Vash and start creating your Eden. You wanted it to be only you and him. You hurt him and humans to come to whatever end you were trying for. I`m not clear on that. All else I can add is that you and Vash faced off and he won. The reason you`re lying here right now. Vash shot you several times and now you`re here with amnesia."
After I finish telling him everything I half expect him to begin crying or embrace me. I didn`t expect what he did in reality. I put my hand on his shoulder.
"Don`t worry, Knives. You`re not him anymore. You…"
He slaps my hand away. It hurt. It really badly. I thought that he had his memory back for a fleeting moment then his confusion lights on his face. I go to reassure him. He gives me a look that scares me.
"Knives?"
"Leave."
"But you always want me to…"
"Leave me alone! Go now!"
I stand up slowly. Everything looks so surreal now. I make my way towards the door.
"Meryl…" I hear him say. I don`t turn around but I wait for him to continue.
"Don`t come up here for awhile."
I didn`t think that anything could hurt so much. I leave the room without acknowledging what he said. I feel like I`m not real. I get inside my room and the tears that were building up spill out of my eyes. I don`t understand why it hurt me so much.
`It was the truth, right? How can that hurt? It`s what Vash wanted me to do…and what he asked me to do. Why does it hurt so much? Why?`
I didn`t want to think about it anymore. The situation itself alarms me. The two men(now three) that I`ve lived with are having strange impacts on me and all they`re causing me is grief. I somehow manage to fall asleep that night.
***Yeah. I bit upsetting but it will get happier again. I promise that. I think that if Knives had amnesia and someone told him what he was and what he did than he would be pretty upset. Yeah…Vash isn`t a huge part but he will be beginning in the next chapter. Still no clear picture on pairings….hehehehehe…good. All is according to plan…*evil laughter*…ehem…Wolfwood`s back! HURRAY! Millie is happy again! See? It`s happier already! Fear not if this chapter was a bit painful to read! Good things will come eventually! : ) ….if Knives can try and forget about what he did.
***Hurray! This story`s actually doing good! Thank you so much, reviewers! On another note I changed the rating from PG to PG-13 cuz I decided that things might come up and I might get a little carried away. Anyways…don`t worry. It won`t get graphic or anything. I really just changed it to play it safe and not get flamed about that.
Chapter 4: Truth
A few days pass and I feel relieved that Knives has not asked about his past again. I really do dread the day when I have to. I won`t lie to him. I tell myself that all the time. I know that Vash wants me to because he wants Knives to remember who he really is. I don`t want him to.
Over the past few days we`ve talked a great deal. I find myself intrigued by him. I suppose that it amuses me that he can`t remember. I feel so strange around him yet I enjoy being around him. I don`t really know what to think about that. I have other things that need tending first.
I`m sitting beside Knives right now. We have been playing cards all day. He`s pretty good at it. He`s been doing very well. Now he can get up on his own and actually get to places by himself. He still needs help going up and down the porch steps. I`m always happy to help him out.
Another thing that I`ve noticed: My attitude is actually getting softer. I used to be…well…bitchy as Vash once put it. I don`t know what`s changing. Maybe it`s due to us living together. Maybe It`s Knives and his amnesia. Maybe it`s Vash who has been acting very strangely around me.
"Meryl! Meryl, where are you?"
`Speak of the devil.`
"What is it, Vash?" I ask aloud. Knives momentarily stops dealing cards.
"Come down here!"
"Do you want Knives down there too?"
"No! Come on! Hurry! You will not believe this!"
I smile at Knives. His face conveys confusion.
"I`m sorry, Knives, but I have to go see what Vash is so exicted about."
"Will you come back up here later?"
"Of course I will."
He nods. I hate his disappointment. I honestly hate to upset him. I run leave the room and make my way towards the front door. I see Vash. He looks so happy.
`What`s going on?`
As I get closer I find out why. Standing beside him acting as if nothing was wrong was Wolfwood. I can`t believe this. I didn`t think that he survived.
`Oh God…where is Millie at a time like this?`
"Long time no see." Wolfwood says. He acts as if he`s been with us the whole time. I circle him for a moment. He laughs.
"Hey stop it! You`re acting as if I`m some kind of ghost or something!"
"Can you blame me!" I exclaim "We thought that you were dead for a long time now! How…what….how are you here right now?"
"Long story. I`ll tell you later or Vash will tell you. Right now there is a certain pudding loving big girl that I have to greet."
He leaves the room in the direction that I point him to. I look up at Vash and cannot help but smile.
"This is so great! Millie can be happy again! I can`t think of anything else that could make this moment any better!"
He smiles at me. It`s a strange smile really. He actually looks happier than he ever has before. My smile falters as I notice this. I feel that odd sensation in my heart again. He places his hand on my shoulder.
`I want him to kiss me….where did that come from? I can`t still like the broom headed idiot…can I?`
Just one look into those green eyes and can feel my legs beginning to turn to jelly. He leans over slightly.
`Can it be? Is he going to…`
"Thank you very much for taking care of Knives today once again!" he exclaimed in a cheery voice. He kisses me on the cheek as he had recently become accustomed to doing. I sigh as he walks off.
`What did I really expect out of that? He only think of me as a friend…and I want it to stay that way!` I tell myself. I decide to go back upstairs with Knives. I need to go think and he usually gives me the courtesy of doing so. First I stop off in my room. I grab a brush and look at myself in the mirror.
`I look awful! I can`t see him like…no. Why am I thinking like that again?! Now it`s Knives…I need to get out more.`
I end up brushing my hair a little. I go to Knives` room. I open the door and nearly run into him. He apparently had been walking around the room. He jumps back until he notices that it`s me. He puts his hand over his chest and breaths out a long breath.
"You scared me!"
I feel my heart in my throat.
"Well you scared me! Sit back down! You`re still not in good enough condition to be walking around all the time!"
He nods in agreement. He gets back into bed. He looks pretty tired. I hand him a glass of water that I got out of the bathroom.
"Thank you."
"No need to say thanks. I don`t mind doing things for you."
He tilts his head and smiles.
`That sounded so lame.` I thought. I sit down on the edge of the bed. I`ve been sitting there lately. I`m not exactly sure when I started doing that.
"I know that I already asked but how do you feel today?" I ask.
"I feel pretty good. What did that guy…Vash…what did he want?"
I feel uneasy all of a sudden. I really didn`t want to talk about this.
"A friend of ours came back to us." I finally say "We thought that he was dead. His name is Nicholas D. Wolfwood. He`s a priest."
Knives smiles for a moment then it fades. I feel my heart pound.
`Please don`t remember anything.`
"That name sounds so familiar…" he says. His voice trails off. I find a temporary moment to hope that he would shrug it off but it was only in vain.
"Do you remember something?"
"I don`t know….am I supposed to remember something about him?"
`No! Why did I have to say his name? Now I`ll have to explain it to him…unless…`
He`s looking at me. He looks expectant and a little afraid. I really hate for him to look so upset. I put my hand on his arm. He looks at it strangely. I remove it quickly.
"Uh…no…you don`t have to remember him."
"Meryl…are you lying to me?"
His eyes are wide. He looks so much like an innocent boy…a large innocent boy. His blue eyes are pleading with me. They`re seeking truth that I must give him no matter how much it hurts.
`I have to live up to a promise. Here goes nothing…`
"Knives…the man downstairs…the reason we thought that he was dead…he was hurt by a man that was controlled by someone."
Knives takes it well until it begins to sink in.
"…It was me, wasn`t it?"
"Not exactly….well…we can`t be sure. There was another man. His name was Legato. We think that he was the one who forced the other man called Chapel to shoot him. They all worked for someone else who ordered this to be done. That man…that man was you. All together these guys and more worked for you. Wolfwood worked for you except he changed when he hung around Vash enough."
Knives turns his gaze down towards the end of the bed.
"Go on."
"I don`t think that I should. You…"
Something frightening happens to him. He suddenly glares at me with those eyes. Those icy blue eyes. I feel my heart beat against my ribcage. This time I am afraid.
"Tell me more…please."
After he says please his gaze softens back up. I feel a little better…but only a little. I think for a moments about what to tell him first. Nothing I think of will help how he`ll feel afterwards.
"The group that you headed was called the Gun-Ho Guns. I think that I need to start before that when you and Vash were one year old. This was before they decided to start a planet here after earth became unlivable. About one hundred and thirty or so years ago a woman named Rem saved you and Vash from…"
"One hundred and thirty or so years ago? But how can that be if I`m human?"
I did not count on this. I forgot that he had amnesia for a moment.
`He forgot what he is and how old he is….`
"Knives…you`re not human. You`re what is known as a plant. I can`t really tell you as much as Vash could but I`ll try. All I really know is that most plants are used for powering our cities."
"Do those plants die?"
"…Yes. After their energy is used they die."
"So humans use…my kind to power their cities then they die?"
I feel uneasy again. I nod. I turn my head away from his. I don`t want to see his reactions anymore.
"You and Vash resemble us of all of the plants. No one really knows why. I just know that you aged very rapidly when you were young but it slowed down when you and Vash were about 19 or 20 years old. You probably resembled how you are a little today."
"Tell me more about this Rem."
I suck in my breath. I told him about Rem and her teachings. I told him about how he began to see that humans caused a lot of their problems and that they used the plants for energy. He discovered that he began to manipulate minds and eventually had several people killed. He became unusually quiet when I mentioned how upset Vash was when Rem died. He only began speaking up again as I begin telling about how Vash decided that humans should not be all to blame.
"So we started fighting?" he asks. I can hear the pain in his voice. This is hurting him so much. I feel tears coming to my eyes as I continue.
"Yes. He ended up shooting you. You got so upset. He ended up running off with your gun. 17 years after that he locates the last living relative to Rem. He goes in…only to find that you killed him. I`m not sure what was said there but you…you shoot his arm off."
I look up once again. His eyes are large and round. They`re shaking. He glances at the door.
"So that`s why he has that arm…because I shot it off. Why did I do that?"
"You wanted your gun back."
"That`s the only reason?"
"…Yeah."
He nods at me then looks up at the ceiling. By the way that he was breathing I can tell that he may have some kind of breakdown at any moment.
"…I don`t know what happened to the arm. Maybe Vash can tell you. The rest that I know is that you started the Gun-Ho Guns in order to hurt Vash and start creating your Eden. You wanted it to be only you and him. You hurt him and humans to come to whatever end you were trying for. I`m not clear on that. All else I can add is that you and Vash faced off and he won. The reason you`re lying here right now. Vash shot you several times and now you`re here with amnesia."
After I finish telling him everything I half expect him to begin crying or embrace me. I didn`t expect what he did in reality. I put my hand on his shoulder.
"Don`t worry, Knives. You`re not him anymore. You…"
He slaps my hand away. It hurt. It really badly. I thought that he had his memory back for a fleeting moment then his confusion lights on his face. I go to reassure him. He gives me a look that scares me.
"Knives?"
"Leave."
"But you always want me to…"
"Leave me alone! Go now!"
I stand up slowly. Everything looks so surreal now. I make my way towards the door.
"Meryl…" I hear him say. I don`t turn around but I wait for him to continue.
"Don`t come up here for awhile."
I didn`t think that anything could hurt so much. I leave the room without acknowledging what he said. I feel like I`m not real. I get inside my room and the tears that were building up spill out of my eyes. I don`t understand why it hurt me so much.
`It was the truth, right? How can that hurt? It`s what Vash wanted me to do…and what he asked me to do. Why does it hurt so much? Why?`
I didn`t want to think about it anymore. The situation itself alarms me. The two men(now three) that I`ve lived with are having strange impacts on me and all they`re causing me is grief. I somehow manage to fall asleep that night.
***Yeah. I bit upsetting but it will get happier again. I promise that. I think that if Knives had amnesia and someone told him what he was and what he did than he would be pretty upset. Yeah…Vash isn`t a huge part but he will be beginning in the next chapter. Still no clear picture on pairings….hehehehehe…good. All is according to plan…*evil laughter*…ehem…Wolfwood`s back! HURRAY! Millie is happy again! See? It`s happier already! Fear not if this chapter was a bit painful to read! Good things will come eventually! : ) ….if Knives can try and forget about what he did.