5:21 PM 8/8/2002
E-mail: lac31685@aol.com
By: Chuquita
Quote of the Week: -from "Garfield"
Irma: Does your little buddy there want to order from the children's menu?
Jon: ...
Garfield: ...
Both: WAH-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!
Irma: (sarcasm) And when I TRY to be funny...
Chuey's Corner:
Vegeta: (to Chu) AGAIN with the "little buddy" comments?
Chuquita: (grins) Yeah, you won't believe the number of different places that term turns up.
Vegeta: (flatly) Charming.
Chuquita: OH! I found the first "buddy hugs" incident.
Goku: (grins) Really?
Chuquita: Yeah, in part 2 of my second story "Tastes Like Chicken". Did you know that's also the first time the Kaka-germs
show up? I word I mean, not the germs themselves.
Goku: Wow, my germies are old.
Chuquita: Actually, they're called "Kakorot germs" in that one, and Veggie's first reaction to being buddy-hugged is
"very disgusted and horrified". Son was crying at the time because he couldn't taste anything. Anyways, Part 3's Corners are
going to dedicated to CHANGES!
Veggy: (snaps his fingers and a pie appears) I like changes.
Vegeta: I don't.
Goku: (squeals) PIE! [grabs half of Veggy's pie and starts to chow down] (happily) I forgot he could do that!
Veggy: (proudly) Making pastries appear out of thin air is part of my programing. [cringes as pie and spit from Goku's eating
lands all over his face] Eew. [snaps his fingers and causes a napkin to appear and wipes his pie-stained face]
Chuquita: Several of the main characters of our stories down here at the Corner have changed since we began back on November
20th of 2000. Veggie has gone from plotting to torture and kill Goku to plotting to steal him away from Chi-Chi in order to
make him his "servant-maid to the throne". Goten has gone from being a stupid Ed-like kid (think Ed Edd and Eddy) to acting
very much in character--
Vegeta: That's because you didn't KNOW how his character acted back then so you made something up!
Chuquita: HUSH! (back to audiance) Bura has gone from being a sweet, innocent little girl (yes she was actually like that at
one time) to being an evil manipulating genius who's trying to get our two saiyajins happy together. Gohan has gone from
being an intellectual smarty-pants to being almost completely identical to his animé/manga self. Chi-Chi's gone from not
really caring about Veggie to wanting to choke him, kill him, and let him drown in his own juices.
Vegeta: HA! No kidding.
Chuquita: And last but certainly not least Son-san here has gone from...well...he hasn't changed that much...I'd have to say
Son's definitely gotten more attached to Veggie over the years, but that's about it.
Goku: (hees) Hee, I am an unmoving rock, Chu-sama.
Chuquita: So I guess that's about it for the personality changes. Some people have gone out of character, some have gotten
more in character, and some have just lost their minds and gone of the deep end. (perks up) But that's oh-kay!
Veggy: (cheerful) And I'm oh-kay!
Goku: (burps up pie crumbs) (also cheerful) And I'm oh-kay too!
Vegeta: (Mr. Grumpy-Pants) I'm not oh-kay.
Goku: Aww, poor lil Veggie. [grabs him and plops the ouji on his lap] You can sit here with me til you're feelin better,
alright? [hugs him from behind]
Vegeta: (glowing bright red) (nervous laugh) Heh-heh, heh-heh-heh...
Veggy: Oh dear....(conserned) (to Chu) Is he gonna be alright?
Chuquita: (flatly) I don't think he was ever alright to begin with. (happily) To Part 3 and BEYOND!
Goku: Wave to the audiance little Veggie. [moves the glowing, numb Veggie's arm back and forth]
Summary: Underwear. We all wear it; well--most of us. Bulma decides to invite a famous fashion designer to Capsule Corp. But
what happens when the fashion designer decides Veggie would be perfect for modeling her new line of underwear? Will Veggie
go through with it? Will he make it down the catwalk without blasting the audiance into oblivion? How will Chi-Chi and Goku
react to this one? Will Veggie be able to use his new "underwear model" title to his advantage? And what happens when the
papers suddenly start blasting rumors about his personal life? Find out!
Chuquita: BTW, Today's End Corner will feature quotes from then that would never work now!
Goku: HOORAY!
Veggy: (surprised) You know what that means?
Goku: ... (just as happy) NOPE!
Veggy: Oh...(grins) Neither do I!
[both sweatdrop]
*****************************************************************************************************************************
" Veh-GEEE, I'm scared! " Goku whined as he stared down at the hundreds of people surrounding the bed.
" Don't worry Kakarrotto, all they want to do is ask a few questions. " Vegeta nervously slid off the bed-post and
walked over the middle of the bed. Goku quickly followed him. Vegeta glared down at the crowd, then snatched up one of the
microphones from a reporter, " ALRIGHT NEWSHOUNDS! YOU LISTEN HERE! I AM NOT GOING TO ANSWER OR REPLY TO ANYTHING YOU SAY!
AND NEITHER IS KAKARROTTO! "
" Who's Kakarrotto? " a woman nearly stuck her video-camera in Vegeta's face. The ouji blinked in surprise of the
camera.
" THAT'S KAKARROTTO!!! " he angrily pointed to Goku, who swallowed hard. The bigger saiyajin looked visibly
frightened at the large group of people.
" Uhh, Veggie? " Goku squeaked out.
" Not now, Kakarrot! I'm busy! NOW WHY DON'T YOU PEOPLE LEAVE US ALONE! I SAID I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU!!! " he
yelled at them.
" Are you related to Ms. La Flu's new model, sir? " a man shoved a microphone infront of Goku.
" Nuh, nuh nuh no. I'm not. " Goku gulped.
" IGNORE them Kakarrotto, pretend as if they aren't here at all. " Vegeta closed his eyes and folded his arms.
" Umm, oh-kay. " Goku shifted uneasily.
" Why did you come here with Mr.... "
" Vegeta Oujisama. "
" KAKARROTTO! DON'T GIVE THEM MY NAME!!! " Vegeta screamed.
" But you said they weren't here so if they aren't really here than what's the harm in answering their questions!! "
Goku cried out.
Vegeta sweatdropped.
" Are you planning to model as well? " another reporter asked Goku.
" No. I just came here to make sure little Veggie was gonna be oh-kay so far from home. " Goku looked over at the
smaller saiyajin with consern.
" Excuse me, "little Veggie" did you say? " the same reporter said while scribbling something down in her notepad.
" ERR, KAKARROT SHUT UP! " Vegeta slapped his hands over Goku's mouth, " DON'T FEED THEIR SICK MINDS!!! "
" "Little Veggie", is that a nickname of some sort? " a 4th reporter asked Vegeta.
" Only in Kakarrotto's mind. " Vegeta grumbled.
" So, Kakarrotto? " reporter number 1 said.
" Son Goku. "
" ...who? "
" My name's Son Goku. S-O-N G-O-K-U. " he spelled it out for her.
" Then who's "Kakarrotto". "
" OH, that's me too. Veggie calls me Kakarrotto, but everybody else I know calls me Son Goku. " Goku shrugged happily
" Really, that's VERY interesting. " she looked up at him momentarily.
" That's interesting? Why is that interesting? " Goku exclaimed, " OHHH! Veggie I KNEW we should have listened to
Bulma! I KNEW it! "
" You mean Bulma Briefs of the Capsule Corperation? " a random reporter gawked.
" Yes! She's Veggie's wife! " Goku threw his arms out, frustrated.
The groups' eyes widened in shock and surprise.
" Ms. Briefs is MARRIED?! " the same random reporter's jaw hung open.
" Hai! Bulma and I ALSO happen to have 3 children together! " Vegeta snorted stubbornly, " Mirai, Bura, and Trunks. "
" *cough*cough* Ji-chan *cough*cough*. " Goku interupted.
" I will not speak of that "fusion baby", he doesn't count. " the ouji glared at the other saiyajin.
" *cough* Vejitto can too count *cough* up to 60 I think *cough*cough*. " Goku spat out another couple fake-coughs.
" Will you keep QUIET! " the smaller saiyajin gritted his teeth in anger.
" Wow, " reporter #2 murmured as he went through his notes, " So let me get this straight, Ms. La Flu's newest model
is named Vegeta Oujisama who has been secretly married to Bulma Briefs, Vice President of Capsule Corporation; had 3 children
with her and... " he trailed off, glancing up at Goku as if waiting for him to say something, " Does. Mrs. Briefs know you're
here, Son..Goku is it? "
" Bulma? Nah, I don't think she knows if I'm here or not. Veggie just pulled up in his limo earlier today infront of
my house and said, "Hey Kakarrotto, wanna come to Paris with me?"...and here I am. I didn't really mean to interupt anything,
it's just that I have to make sure my little buddy stays out of trouble, you know? " Goku said, feeling guilty.
" Your "little buddy"? "
" Yeah, a little buddy is...well it's...it's a complicated role but...well a little buddy is someone who is really
really special and that person to me happens to be Veggie! " Goku grinned, trying to sum up what would normally take about an
hour to explain to the media person.
" Really? How long has Mr. Oujisama been your "little buddy"? "
" Umm, gee it's been a lot of years to count and... " Goku bit his lip, trying to think back, " Well let's see, 10
plus 7 would take us back to after we beat Cell, and before that it was 3 and that's when we met Mirai and another year since
Freezer so...HOLY MACKERAL VEGGIE'S BEEN MY LITTLE BUDDY FOR 21 YEARS NOW!!! " the larger saiyajin gasped in shock. He turned
to Vegeta with his eyes bulging out of his head and his jaw hanging almost to the floor. Vegeta just waved back to him
happily.
" How, how long have you and Mrs. Briefs been married Mr. Oujisama? " the reporter asked Vegeta, still nervous from
the shocked expression on Goku's face. The bigger saiyajin quickly went back to counting the years again to see if he had
miscounted somewhere.
" I'd say 19. At least I think it's 19. Bulma's always making me remember these stupid numbers! I know what day of
the year it is so why do I need to know the numbers! It's stupid! " Vegeta complained, racking his own brain for the exact
year, " Now you see with Kakarrot over there it's easy! I'm the prince and he's the peasant! You don't need to know how any
dates! You're BORN into the royal family!! "
" Royal family? What's he talking about? " reporter 3 said to reporter 4, who shrugged.
" I AM THE GREAT AND POWERFUL SAIYAJIN NO OUJI YOU MORONS!! I AM SET TO INHERIT THE ENTIRE PLANET OF BEJITO-SEI which
has so inconviently been blown up for several decades BUT STILL! I, I, I'M HIS RULER!! " he pointed at Goku, who momentarily
paused his 3rd re-count of having the ouji as his little buddy, " YES, I RULE OVER KAKARROTTO HERE!! " Vegeta grabbed one
of the reporter's video cameras, " Do you mind if I borrow this real fast I'm on a roll. "
" Uh, sure. Go ahead. " the reporter scratched her head.
" DO YOU HEAR THAT ONNA!! " Vegeta shouted into the camera he was holding up infront of him, " RULER OF KAKARROTTO'S
PEASANT-ISH EXISTANCE!! THAT'S ME!!! "
" Oh no... " Bulma groaned as she sat on the couch infront of the TV, " Now he's done it! " she picked up the phone
and dialed the Son home, " Hello? Gohan? Chi-Chi? "
" Hello? " a sad, weak voice said on the line.
" Chi-Chi? " Bulma cocked an eyebrow.
" He left, Bulma...I scared him off...and now he's off somewhere with that Ouji doing who knows WHAT to my poor
little Go-chan! "
" I know what he's doing alright. " Bulma said dryly watching Vegeta bad-mouthing Chi-Chi on national television.
" You what? " Chi-Chi's voice instantly sounded back in its normal tone.
" Chi-Chi, pick up the remote and turn on the TV, then turn to channel 54. " Bulma sighed, distressed about what
terrible embarassing headlines would probably be in the tabloids and newspapers by tommorow morning courtesy of her royal
husband.
" Well, alright. " Chi-Chi clicked the remote up a few channels and shrieked to see none-other-than her mortal enemy
boasting into a camera. Goku was sitting behind him counting his fingers. The duo were in the middle of a large bed,
surrounded by newspeople and camera crews.
" GAH! I got 22 this time!!! " Goku yelped as he stared at his hands, " THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!! I NEVER KEEP A LITTLE
BUDDY LONGER THAN 5 YEARS!! Maybe I'm doing the math wrong...Chi-chan what's 10 plus 7 plus 3 plus 1? " he cried into the
camera.
" 21, Go-chan. " Chi-Chi replied to the distressed saiyajin on the screen.
" HEAR THIS ONE, ONNA? I'VE BEEN KAKAY'S LITTLE BUDDY FOR OVER 2 _DECADES_ NOW!! " Vegeta laughed victoriously into
the camera, grabbing Goku and pulling him shoulder-to-shoulder with the little ouji, " AND YOU CAN COUNT ON ME HOLDING THAT
TITLE FOR ANOTHER 2 _CENTURIES_ AS WELL!! " he smiled cheerfully at the bigger saiyajin, " In't that right, Kakay? "
" What are you TALKING about!! Chi-chan don't listen to him!!! " Goku waved his arms in the air, freaking out.
" See Onna? Kakay's afraid that if you find out how much Kakay deeply cares for me you'll tie him up and lock him in
that cage you keep in your basement for 6 months and feed him nothing but table scraps and crumbs from the trash can like
the evil witch you are? " he snickered, grabbing Goku's arm and clinging to it.
" But Veggie, my house doesn't HAVE a basement!!! " Goku exclaimed.
" Vegeta you're a dead man. " Bulma shook her head, groaning, " In front of all those people...poor SON-KUN! Poor
ME!!! "
" *RING*RING*RING*! "
" Ahh, right on time. " Vegeta smirked, casually whipping out his cellphone, " Hello? You've reached the saiyajin on
ouji, ruler of Kakay's little Kaka-world, how may I help you? "
" OUJI!!! WAIT'LL-I-GET-MY-HANDS-ON-YOU-I'LL-RIP-YOU-LIMB-FROM-LIMB-YOU-DISGUSTING-LITTLE-CREATURE-OOH-HOW-I-HATE-YOU
-USING-MY-GO-CHAN-LIKE-THIS-HE-NEVER-DID-ANYTHING-TO-YOU-I-SWEAR-I-OUGHTA-- "
" Heh. " Vegeta placed his hand over the mouth of the phone, temporarily silences Chi-Chi's threatening screams. He
looked up at the bigger saiyajin, " Hey Kakay, guess who's on the phone? "
" Who Veggie? " Goku said, a bit pale.
" It's Onna. And she says she's going to kill you the next time she sees you because she's so mad that you care more
for me than her smelly Onna-self. " Vegeta mocked.
" NO! CHI-CHAN WOULD NEVER SAY A THING LIKE THAT ABOUT ME! SHE'D NEVER WANNA HURT ME!! " Goku shrieked, horrified.
" DON'T YOU LIE TO HIM OUJI!!! " Chi-Chi screamed into the phone.
" Don't worry Onna, I'll take VERY GOOD "care" of him. What's that? Give me your blessing? How very quaint of you? "
Vegeta carried on with his own little conversation while Chi-Chi was busy ranting her head off into the phone. He turned to
the group of people, " By the way you hollywood-obsessed bakayaroes, Kaka-chan and his attempted murderess live at house #423
in the mountain area. The phone number is 555-KAKA; that's 555-5252 for all you letter-impaired reporters. Onna's private
line is 555-6789 and Kaka-chan's is 555-1234. His e-mail address is Buddy#1@saiyajins_need_buddies_2.com. "
" How do you KNOW all this stuff! " Goku whispered loudly to him.
The ouji just grinned back at him, " I'm very sneaky. "
" WHERE DID YOU SAY MRS. SON'S HOUSE IS LOCATED? " a reporter in the back of the room shouted.
" 423 MOUNTAIN AREA!! " Vegeta shouted back.
" THANKS! " the reporter raised his hand, then instantly rushed out of the room, quickly followed by the rest of the
news-hungry writers. Goku sighed with relief and fell down onto the bed on his back. La Flu was laying on the floor,
twitching in pain due to having people stand and run overtop of her.
" Oww....my spine... " she whinced, still twitching.
" Little Veggie....are they...gone? " Goku shivered, staring up at the ceiling.
" Why yes my future servant-maid, I believe they are. " Vegeta smirked, peering down at him.
" Ohh, good.. " Goku closed his eyes and smiled peacefully. The ouji let out a small giggle, then layed down on his
back beside him for a good 10 seconds. Goku's eyes suddenly shot open, " OH NO!! MY HOUSE!!! " he shrieked, leaping off the
bed. Vegeta growled detestfully, then snorted and got off the bed as well. He snapped his fingers in defeat.
" OH VEGGIE MY HOUSE!! THEY'RE GOING TO MY HOUSE AND THEY'RE GONNA GET THEIR DIRTY LITTLE RUMOR-SPREADING PAWS ALL
OVER MY STUFF AND--Chi-chan? OH NO CHI-CHAN'S IN TROUBLE AND IT'S ALL MY FAULT FOR COMING BACK HERE! WHAT AM I SAYING! I
SHOULD HAVE NEVER COME BACK HERE IN THE FIRST PLACE OH VEGGIE WHAT AM I GONNA DO!! " he nervously bit his nails, " HA! I've
got it! " a cartoon-ish light-bulb appeared over Goku's head, signaling an idea, " I'll teleport back home, then teleport
Chi-chan AND my home somewhere else! I'M BRILLIANT!! "
" You mean you're gonna leave your little buddy all alone in this faraway place all by himself with no one to hug? "
Vegeta fake-sniffled. Goku froze and looked over at the ouji, who now had fake-tears welling up in his eyes.
" I, I, Veh, Veggie I won't be gone long. Just long enough to save Chi-chan and then I'll, I'll-- "
" --come back for me? "
" YEAH! " the larger saiyajin said comfortingly as he patted Vegeta on the head.
" But, but what if you DON'T come back for me? What if you forget about me forever? I'll end up in a cold dark alley
someplace with no one to turn to!! " he exclaimed over-dramatically.
" No one? " Goku's expression saddened.
" And I'll just starve seeing how little I am and how hard it is to steal food around here from the RATS-- "
" Little Veggie...STARVE? " Goku's eyes watered as well.
" That's right, STARVE! And winter is on it's way too-- "
" --Veggie it's August. "
" SHADDUP!! " Vegeta snapped at the interuption to his little monologue. He quickly switched back to feeling sorry
for himself, " And there I'll be cold and alone...without something NICE and BIG and WARM to keep me from freezing in the
harsh winter air. I'll probably catch pneumonia and end up dying a COLD LONELY death ALONE with no one there to hold me in
their arms and keep me warm with their body heat. And after I've been stiff for a while the RATS will come and steal some new
food for their pathetic rodent meals, MY DEAD DECAYING _LONELY_ CARCASS!!! " he cried, falling onto the bed.
" NO! NO NO NO NO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! "
Goku wailed, grabbing Vegeta and hugging him while sobbing into the prince's shirt, " VEGGIE I'D NEVER LET THAT HAPPEN TO YOU
YOU KNOW THAT!!! " he sobbed in heavy guilt. An evil smirk worked its way around Vegeta's face and he snickered a couple
times, " I LOVE MY CUTE LITTLE BUDDY TOO MUCH TO LET HIM CATCH PE-NEMONINA AND DIE AND GET EATEN BY RATS!!! " Goku cried,
the terrifying images Vegeta had concocted from his story still fresh in Goku's mind.
" Ahh, so I'm 'cute' now too, eh? " Vegeta cracked his knuckles behind the still sobbing Goku's back.
" Veggie's always been cute. Veggie knows that. " Goku sniffled, attempting to calm down.
" Yes, indeed. " Vegeta smirked, " So, will Kakarrotto stay here with his little buddy until he is finished with this
little underwear gig of his? "
" Yes Veggie. " Goku set Vegeta back on the ground, " Yes yes yes a thousand times yes! " he rubbed his still teary
eyes, " But, what am I gonna do about Chi-chan? "
" Oh she'll manage. Why that Onna's probably beating them off with a stick by now! " he shrugged.
" Really little Veggie? " Goku smiled.
" Hmm, no, probably not. If I know Onna she's more likely throwing bombs and blasting them with her bazooka. " Vegeta
recalled dryly. He grinned, " You know what Kakarrotto, after what just happened here with those papa-razzis I think I can
pull this underwear thing off and still hold onto my pride! "
" Hooray! Veggie is confident again! " Goku grinned, back to his normal cheery self.
" Great! " La Flu said, finally able to stand up again, " Because we're going to need you back out there in a few
hours for the rest of the show! The evening portion I mean! "
" There's more? " Vegeta's shoulders dropped, " You mean I haven't even gotten past Contract task number 1!!! " he
gawked.
" Nope! Now let's get going and find some proper-sized costumes for you to wear! " she smiled, leaving the room.
" Undie-shopping for Veggie! Undie-shopping for Veggie! " Goku chanted happily, skipping out of the room after her.
Vegeta groaned, " I hate this job....again. "
" I hate that Ouji....again. " Chi-Chi muttered as she hid in her house. All the doors had been locked shut, the
blinds down, the windows securely locked, " How many times can I say I hate him before something is actually DONE about it! "
she hissed. The troops of media personel were now crowded around the Son home. Gohan and Goten, who were still unaware of
the goings-on; along with Videl; were sitting in the living room watching TV.
" Hey Kaasan why'd you close all the blinds? It's dark in here? " Gohan asked, looking over his shoulder. The trio
was sitting on the couch.
Chi-Chi walked past them and peeked out one through the blinds on one of the windows in the living room, then whinced
and quickly shut it, " OHHHHHH! STUPID OUJI!!! "
" What'd he do this time? " Gohan groaned, tired.
" Ugh, the Ouji's become a European Underwear Fashion Model and has dragged Go-chan to Paris with him, bad-mouthed me
on national television, and told a large group of news-reporters where our house is and they are currently standing around
our home waiting to "interview" me and take pictures of the "underground basement dungeon" I keep Goku locked up in. "
Chi-Chi folded her arms.
" I must be getting used to you people because for some odd reason nothing Vegeta does surprises me anymore. " Videl
shook her head and groaned.
" Uncle Veggie can be very weird sometimes! " Goten grinned at her.
" Tell me about it. " she rolled her eyes.
" Umm, Kaasan, we don't HAVE an underground basement dungeon. " Gohan cocked an eyebrow.
" The reporters think we do. You know that evil little Ouji told them everytime Goku mentions his name that I lock
him up in this little cage in the basement and feed him table scraps! How absurd!! " Chi-Chi said in disgust.
" Table scraps? " Videl blinked.
" Vegeta's got a good imagination, so sue me! But that doesn't mean he had to send those people over here! " she
exclaimed, " And now I have to go out there and EXPLAIN myself to them!!! "
" You mean the paparazzi? " Videl asked, " Oh that's simple. " she shrugged.
" SIMPLE!!! HOW IS IT SIMPLE!!! " Chi-Chi shrieked, " I CAN'T TALK TO THEM! THEY ONLY HEAR BITS AN PIECES AND SPREAD
THEM OUT INTO RUMORS!!! "
" Exactly! Just do what my Dad does when HE gets bombarded with news reporters about rumors! " Videl smiled, " Talk
about the other guy. "
" The, "other guy"? " Chi-Chi looked at her inquizzitively.
" Yeah, if your, umm, competitor talks bad about you, just talk back about how bad a person HE is and all the
HORRIBLE things he's done. Heck, you can even make up a few rumors of your own, I guess. "
" Videl...THAT'S GENIUS!!! " Chi-Chi grinned victoriously, then shook her hand, " I'm proud to have you as my future
daughter-in-law! " she turned to Gohan, " Good job Gohan! " the older saiyajin sweatdropped. She turned back to Videl, " I
know he's going to be good hands! Now if you'll both excuse me I'm going to prepare to meet the press! " Chi-Chi said
victoriously, marching out of the room, " WATCH FOR ME ON CHANNEL 73, KIDS!! "
Videl groaned, " What have I done... "
Gohan peered over the couch at her; facefaulted, " More like what have WE done... "
" GREETINGS LADIES AND GENTLEMEN OF THE PRESS!! " Chi-Chi said proudly as she stood on the pedistal CNN had provided
her with infront of her house, " AS YOU MAY KNOW I AM SON CHI-CHI, SON GOKU; or as that slimy evil little ouji refers to him
as, Kakay; HOWEVER YOU MAY NOT KNOW THAT A GREAT DEAL OF WHAT THE "EVIL ONE" HAS SAID TO YOU, IS A LIE! A BIG FAT PROTRUDING
ZIT OF A TALE UPON WHICH I WILL PLUCK WITH THE TWEEZERS OF TRUTH UNTIL IT EXPLODES AND VOMITS BACK IN YOUR FACES---ESPECIALLY
YOURS--OUJI!! "
" Is it just me, or is this about to get ugly? " Gohan stared at the TV screen, mortified.
" It's about to get ugly. " Videl paraphrased him with a similar expression on her face.
" Look Gohan! Mommy's on TV! " Goten chirped happily.
" Yes, Goten, yes she is. " he covered his eyes with his hands, then slowly tore them away and forced himself to
watch, just to make sure Chi-Chi didn't say anything about him.
" The OUJI says that I keep my Go-chan CAPTIVE in some CAGE in the basement when he merely mentions that creatures
NAME! That OBVIOUSLY, is a LIE. I have no basement, no cage, and I would never abuse my own husband to save him from that
Ouji's wicked clutches!!! " she pounded her fist on the podium desk, " You see, *sniffle* I am not the VILLAIN in this
TWISTED little game called life, HE IS! *sob* You see, when my sweet little Gohan was only a mere 5 years old that MONSTER
came to Earth from outer space in order to destory our planet! His LACKEY eventually killed several of our friends during the
invasion, including my baby's own mentor, Piccolo. "
" Heeheehee, Gohan's a baby. " Goten giggled at the TV, then pointed and laughed at his brother. Gohan moaned and
held each side of his head.
" After my husband, SON GOKU; not "Kakay"; arrived he thoroughly pounded that large brute to a plup. When he told
that Ouji to leave and take the giant with him, instead of leaving he, he KILLED HIM! KILLED HIS OWN PARTNER! " she broke
into an overdramatic sob.
" My God! Gohan your Mom's as big a ham on TV as Vegeta is! " Videl gawked.
Gohan muttered, " I noticed. "
" And after that evil incarnate and my Go-chan exchanged blows poor Goku made the BIGGEST MISTAKE of his LIFE! He let
Vegeta LIVE!! He let him GET AWAY! WHY you ask? Because he wanted to FIGHT HIM AGAIN! Of all the STUPID ideas! And then he
ends up meeting that Ouji in space, apparently from what I've heard the Ouji helped him get better after some battle or
another and then got KILLED! Now you may think, oh hooray! JOY! RAPTURE! He's finally dead! But NO, if there's one thing I've
learned after battling that monster for so many years it's that he never TRUELY dies. Like some kind of otherworldy evil that
cannot rest until he has wooed my Go-chan away from me and into his CLUTCHES!!! It was after Goku got well that he made the
next two BIGGEST MISTAKES OF HIS LIFE!!! He dubbed the Ouji has his newest "little buddy" and destroyed the tyrant that had
enslaved the Ouji since he was a child. Of course the stupid little prince had no idea what the title Goku had bestowed upon
his SMELLY UNWORTHY HEAD meant so he ends up spending his first 6 months as a visitor at Capsule Corp SKIPPING and FROLICKING
around the premises as if he's the luckiest little Ouji in the land. "
" Frolicking? HIM?! " Videl glanced over at Gohan for an answer.
" Vegeta was just plain happy to be alive. He thought Toussan was dead and he was the "strongest in the universe". "
" Yeah that makes more sense to me, I guess. " she folded her arms.
" He and Kaasan were actually pretty good friends until he found out Toussan was alive and went out after him. By the
time he got back he and Kaasan were mortal enemies. " Gohan sighed.
" I...can't see them as friends. " Videl shook her head.
" Believe me, you don't want to. It's just plain creepy. It was creepy to watch then and it's creepy to think back
and remember watching it to begin with. "
" ...he was gone for a WHOLE YEAR! " Chi-Chi continued on the TV set, " And the next time I saw him he was wearing
that bright pink golf shirt and those yellow pants and those disgusting bowling shoes and hugging onto my Go-chan for DEAR
LIFE!! All the while smirking at me; as if plotting something...something EVIL!! Like MURDER!! "
The crowd gasped.
" Of course he never DID kill me; obviously; but it took us a good 5 to 6 days to kick him out of the house and send
the little demon back packing to Capsule Corp. And ever since that dark day I've been battling his EVILNESS!!! If you had any
idea how OBSSESSED that Ouji is with stealing my Goku! " Chi-Chi started to fake-sob again.
" Umm, exactly how obsessed are we, uh, talking about? " the first reporter to get a word in edgewise squeaked out,
still in shock.
Chi-Chi instantly stopped crying and swiped the microphone out of his hand, " I thought you'd never ask! " she
grinned, then went back into drama-mode, " Vegeta has an entire closet full of clothes. "
" ... " crickets chirped in the backround.
" Wouldja let me finish? " she said flatly.
" Huh? Oh, yeah yeah yeah, sure. " the crowd agreed, nodding their heads like bobble-head dolls.
" He has an entire secret closet full of clothes which are perfectly designed to fit my Go-chan once he ENSLAVES him.
And not just any clothes my friends; may I call you my friends?; I'm talking really peculiar outfits that NORMAL 'saiyajins'
don't wear on a daily basis. A reliable source has told me that he has outfits for Go-chan in there such as some
'sassy French maid' uniform, a 'genie' uniform, a 'peasant' (who hasn't seen that one coming) uniform, a 'spa' uniform, and
several others which I care to not mention infront of any children who may be watching! Not to mention the fact that I've
seen him performing bizarre alien rituals and trying to cast spells over Goku in order to tear him away from me. AND the Ouji
has this life-sized stuffed doll of Go-chan that he pretends is the real Go-chan and puts on little Ouji-plays with it and
dresses it up in the costumes he's keeping for Go-chan and tucks it in bed with him at night!!! "
" Now she's just making stuff up. " Videl sat back in disgust.
" I wouldn't be so sure about that. " Gohan mentioned dryly.
" I know the last one was fake cuz I saw Uncle Veggie stuffing Kaka-chan in that cubby-hole in his ceiling one time
and Uncle Veggie said that Kaka-chan sleeps in the ceiling cubby-hole to keep him safe from anything dangerous that might
come into the room while Uncle Veggie is asleep and unable to save his dolly. " Goten explained.
" He calls the DOLL "Kaka-chan"?! " Gohan sweatdropped.
" Yup. At least that's what he told me his big dolly's name was. " Goten scratched his head.
" So as you can see ladies and gentlemen, I am nothing more than a justice-serving wife trying to protect her Go-chan
from the evil that is Vegeta. *sniff*. " Chi-Chi then perked up, " Now if you'll all follow me back to the Capsule
Corperation I can show you some real evidence to support my story and make all your little tabloids RICH by tommorow morning,
K? "
" RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAA!!! " they cheered. Chi-Chi ran inside.
" Excuse me Gohan, Mommy's got to get one of Toussan's training gi's to compare sizes with that disgusting ouji-wear
Vegeta has created for him. " she cheerfully grabbed a gi out of Goku's room and returned outside where she drove off,
quickly followed by the reporters in their own vehicles.
" FINALLY some peace and quiet! " Gohan sighed with relief.
" Yeah. " Videl agreed.
" So, do you want me to go in the other room so you two can makeout? " Goten asked, a cheesy grin on his face.
Gohan and Videl instantly blushed with embarassment, the two silent for several seconds.
" Umm, "
" Uh.. "
" Maybe it would be a good idea to go after Kaasan, you know, make sure she's oh-kay. " Gohan said uneasily, getting
up.
" Err, yeah. What a great idea! " Videl laughed nervously, following him out the door, " We can use my helicopter to
get there! " she paused, then looked over her shoulder to see Goten waving goodbye with a big grin on his face. The boy was
now nestled infront of the TV with a big bag of peanut m-n-m's in his lap. He popped a candy in his mouth.
" Bye Gohan! Bye Videl! " he waved.
" OOH! " Videl stomped back inside, grabbed Goten by the arm and dragged him out along with her, " Honestly! Like
we're gonna leave you alone infront of the tube stuffing your face with sugar! COME ON GOHAN! " she turned towards him and
shouted, " WE'RE READY! "
" Yeah, I guess you shouldn't leave me alone by myself. You two are gonna be a really responsible Kaasan and Toussan
someday-- " Videl sweatdropped at the comment, " --BOY I'm glad you're not MY parents! " Goten grinned. Both Videl and Gohan
fell the floor animé style.
" I have a feeling this is going to be a LOOOONG ride. " Videl grumbled.
" I hate doing this! I feel like one of Bura's barbie dolls or something!! " Vegeta snarled as he stood outside the
dressing room, " At least her dolls wore something else OTHER than just their UNDERWEAR!!! "
" Stop complaining 'Geta you look great! " La Flu complimented him.
" MY NAME'S NOT 'GETA!! "
" HIS NAME'S NOT 'GETA!! " both Goku and Vegeta snapped at the same time. La Flu sweatdropped. Goku smiled, instantly
cheering up, " His name's little Veggie and Vegeta. And you can't spell either one of those without the VEHHHHHHHH. " he
broke into a grin, " Heehee! "
" Well excuse me or thinking about it but "little Veggie" just isn't a name you would give an underwear model. " La
Flu cocked her head.
" Oh yeah well 'Geta sounds like a dishwashing detergent. You know, like Wisk or Tide or that stuff in the blue
bottle that Chi-Chi always puts in the washing machine. " Goku said from on his knees, making funny faces.
" That's because Wisk and Tide ARE washing machine detergents. You use them for CLOTHES. " Vegeta said, annoyed.
Goku's face paled, " Uh-oh...gee Veggie I wish you had told me that 3 months ago. " he bit his lip, " I was
wondering why whenever I washed the dishes the spoons would smell kinda funny. "
" Remind me not to eat over at your house for a while, Kakarrot. " Vegeta cringed.
" Oh, you won't have to worry about that little Veggie, Chi-chan doesn't want you anywhere near my house anyways! "
Goku started making funny faces again.
The ouji cocked an eyebrow suddenly realizing where Goku was. He looked over his shoulder and shrieked, " WHAT THE
HECK ARE YOU DOING DOWN THERE!!! " his face glowed red brighter than a 120 watt light bulb.
" Making funny faces. " Goku replied innocently, " Look! I can see my reflection in your butt! " he pointed to
Vegeta's present pair of underwear, which was a metalic silver coloring. The smaller saiyajin sweatdropped.
" Kakarrotto, that is NOT funny. " he said flatly. Goku pouted, then looked up at him happily.
" I think it is! "
" THEN GO FIND A SPARE DRESSING ROOM AND MAKE FACES IN THAT!!! NOT IN THE UNDERWEAR I'M WEARING!!! " Vegeta snapped
at him, mortified.
Goku stood up and waddled into the formerly mentioned spare dressing room, " Gosh Veggie you don't have to be so
grumpy all the time! "
" I'm not wearing these! I'm not! I didn't like them the first time and now that Kakarrotto's made 'funny faces'
in them I'm even more sure I will not walk onto that runway in these! " Vegeta snorted, stubbornly folding his arms.
" Well 'Geta at least you're getting used to this, for one thing. " La Flu chuckled.
" Really? And HOW can you tell? " the ouji rolled his eyes.
" You're complaining just like all my other models and you have no more problems with going on the runway. " she
smirked. The saiyajin paused.
" What do you know about that. " he murmured as he walked back into the dressing room, then yelped a moment later
and sent a kick sending Goku flying out of the dressing room, " I SAID A _SPARE_ DRESSING ROOM! AS IN ONE I'M NOT
USING!!! " he shook his fist in the air, then pointed at La Flu, " AND DON'T CALL ME 'GETA!! " he slammed the door shut
behind him.
Goku sat on the ground, smiling up at La Flu, " Is he the BEST little buddy or WHAT! "
La Flu sweatdropped, " Uh--huh... "
" He's been in there trying on stuff for a long time. " Goku pouted as he and La Flu waited outside the dressing
room, " I WANNA SEE MY LITTLE VEGGIE!! " he waved his arms in the air, then sighed and fell onto his back from sitting
down. He glanced over at La Flu, " Say lady? How about you let me be in the underwear show with Veggie? " he looked
up at her with big sparkily eyes.
" Uh, no. " La Flu said flatly.
" Buh y not? " the large saiyajin sniffled.
" You have absolutely no qualifications! "
" My tushie's cute TOO ya know. " Goku hmmphed.
" Whether your "tushie" is cute or not has NOTHING to do with modeling!!...well maybe it has a LITTLE to do
with it, BUT NOT ENOUGH TO GET YOU INTO THE SHOW! "
" Ohh. " Goku hung his head, " I can still stay backstage and root Veggie on though, right? "
" Yes Mr. Son. " she sighed.
" I mean, *giggle* what would you call me anyway, what with YOUR nickname creativity, Oku? Or maybe you'd even
drop the O too and make it just plan 'ol Ku. Pigeons make that sound you know, coo coo coo. I once saw this one
pigeon on TV and-- "
" --TA DA!! " the dressing room door flung open. Vegeta smirked at them, " So! Kaka-chan, whadda think? "
Goku sat up and blinked at his little buddy, who was now wearing a pair of white briefs with many little stringies
hanging from it. The ouji was also wearing a pair of white wrist things similar to Goku's blue ones. He had a second pair
on each of his ankles and had a silver crown sitting at the end of the wider part of his widow's peak. Goku sweatdropped.
" Wow...little Veggie. You look, uhh, well, umm, " he scratched his head, his mind drawing a blank for the word he
wanted to put at the end of his sentence. Vegeta whipped out the cell phone he had used earlier and leaned the phone near
Goku's mouth.
" Would you care to repeat that into the tape recorder, Kakarrotto? " Vegeta asked, amused.
" Veggie that is a cell phone. " Goku pointed to it.
" ...DARNIT! " Vegeta snapped at himself, then glanced up at the larger saiyajin, " So it is, Kakarrotto. So it is. "
he repeated, then backed up into the dressing room, only to re-emerge several seconds later carrying a small tape-recorder,
" Now, Kakarrot. Would you care to repeat that into the TAPE RECORDER? "
" Um, I, I guess little Veggie. " Goku rubbed the back of his head, uneasily. He cleared his throat, " Wow...little
Veggie. You look, uhh, well, umm... " he trailed off. Vegeta clicked the tape recorder off impatiently.
" Gorgeous? Pleasing? godly? Absolutely exquisite and beautiful to behold? " the ouji offered.
" Hmm... " Goku thought for a moment. Vegeta clicked on his tape recorder on again, " Silly! "
" WAH!!! " the small saiyajin fell to the floor animé style, " "SILLY"!!! " he exclaimed, getting up, " I DIDN'T SAY
THAT!!! "
" I know you didn't. I did. "
Vegeta sweatdropped, " Is there ANY OTHER WORD such as one of the ones I offered you that you would use to BETTER
describe your feelings other than 'silly'. " he mocked the last word.
" Mmm...NOPE! " Goku grinned. The ouji stomped almost toe-to-toe with his peasant and held up the tape recorder.
" Kakay, could you do me a favor and giggly say into the tape recorder "Oh V-sama, that is the sassiest most
beautiful pair of underwear I've ever seen on your absolutely perfect body!". "
" V-sama??? " Goku cocked an eyebrow at him.
" ... "
" ... "
" You're kidding...right? "
" JUST SAY THE LINE I'M SUPPOSED TO BE ONSTAGE IN 3 MINUTES!! " Vegeta yelled at him.
" Will it make little Veggie happy? " Goku asked.
" Yes, it will make little Veggie very VERY happy. " Vegeta rubbed his hands together.
" And you're not gonna use it in some mean 'ol trick against Chi-chan...are you lil Veggie? "
" ...NAH! Why would I do something "silly" like that! " Vegeta laughed nervously. Goku opened his mouth, only to have
Vegeta send a death-glare at him, instantly silencing the other saiyajin.
" ...umm, oh-kay. Gimmie the tape player. " Goku sighed, taking the object from the short prince, " Wait, " he
stopped himself before pressing the record button, " You want me to giggle too, right? "
" Yes Kakarrotto. I want you to giggle like you're having the time of your life! As if you're in some kind of
kaka-utopia for a brief period. " Vegeta explained.
Goku shrugged, " Ooo-kay little buddy. " he pressed the record button, " Oh V-sama, that is the sassiest most
beautiful pair of underwear I've ever seen on your absolutely perfect body! " the large saiyajin giggled wildly as he bounced
around the room. Goku clicked the stop button, then grinned and handed the tape recorder back to Vegeta, " Howsat little
buddy? "
" ... " Vegeta held out his shaking, bright red hand and slowly retrieved his tape recorder. He then walked into his
dressing room, still glowing brightly. La Flu and Goku stood there infront of the dressing room door, staring at it for a
moment. Suddenly a wild uncontrolable squeal wailed from inside the dressing room, " AHHHHH-HAHAHAHAHAHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
HEEEEEEEEHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhHHhhhhhhhHHhhh... "
The duo sweatdropped.
Vegeta emerged from the dressing room in a boastful stride; the bright red glow gone from his face. However his hair
was looking much more frizzied than when he had entered. He nodded to Goku, " Thank you Kahhhh.. " a small glow returned to
the ouji's face. Vegeta quickly slapped himself across the face, causing the glow to disappear, " --karrotto. "
" Aww, do not mention it little Veggie. " Goku smiled, " Now just go out there and show off your lil tushie the big
crowd of strangers with cameras! "
Vegeta sweatdropped, " You sure have an odd way of phrasing things, you know that, Kakarrot? "
" Mmm, nooooOOOOoooo. " Goku replied, then flashed a big grin at him.
" Uh-huh. " the ouji said flatly, then headed for the curtains to the runway. He smirked, " Be sure to watch for me,
Kakarrotto! "
" I will peek behind the curtains little Veggie 'o mine! " Goku saluted the ouji, following him to backstage. Vegeta
grabbed ahold of one of the curtains, " Countdown for me, Kaka-chan? "
" You got it! " the larger saiyajin gave him a thumbs-up, " 3, 2, 1-- "
Vegeta flung the curtains aside and paraded out onto the runway, this time welcoming the cheers and camera flashes
of the crowd, " Yes, yes, thank you for recognizing my SUPERIOR body, Earth-people. " he boasted. The crowd only cheered
louder.
" Isn't he great! " La Flu clasped her hands together happily, " 'Geta's just PERFECT for this job! "
" *A-HEM*! " Goku coughed loudly.
" Alright, "Little Veggie". Whichever you prefer. " she shrugged.
" 'Geta sounds like a name for someone who looks like Bulma, not someone who looks like Veggie. " Goku commented,
then lifted his foot only to find something stuck to the bottom of it. He pulled it off his shoe and held it up,
" 'The Globe', August 12th. Hey! This magazine's from today! " Goku chirped, then folded it to see the cover. When the
cover-page came into view he took one look at the bold-lettered headline and shrieked. The saiyajin's face turned a
stark white and a nervous sweat dripped down his face, " Wha-wha-wha-wha-wha-wha-wha-- "
" I'm ba-ack! " Vegeta pushed his hair back in a cocky manner, " Who knew humans had such good taste in saiyajin
physique! I'm beautiful, they know I'm beautiful, and they know how to show their gratitude for it! " he put his hands
on his hips, " You know what Kakarrotto, maybe I should start charging them for the pleasure of gazing their unworthy
eyes upon my heart-throb of a body. "
" I think somebody already did. " Goku muttered in shock, still staring at the magazine.
" What's that? What are you looking at?! " Vegeta demanded, trying to reach Goku by jumping up and down, his
arms waving in the air to grab the magazine. Instead Goku nervously flipped the magazine around and shoved the
cover-image in Vegeta's face.
" Read. " Goku said in a frightened, yet dead-pan voice.
Vegeta blinked, staring at the magazine. He read the headline outloud, " Secret Capsule Corp Supermodel Hubby
Lusts after Mountain Mistress. " he scratched his head, " So? "
Goku shoved Vegeta's head down a little further so his eyes had a clear view of the picture below the headline.
The ouji's eyes widened as big as saucer-pans as the information of what he was looking at reached his brain. He
took one look up at Goku and screamed in horror, " AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! "
*****************************************************************************************************************************
10:22 PM 8/12/2002
END OF PART 3!
Chuquita: (sighs happily) Ahh, if there's one thing I love about fanfiction, it's a good 'ol fashioned cliffhanger.
Vegeta: (narrowing his eyes) You always worry me when you use these.
Veggy: (curious) I'm not worried.
Vegeta: (angrily) THAT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT IN THIS STORY!!!
Veggy: (snorts) That's no reason to get huffy with me "Mr. Obsessive". [folds his arms]
Vegeta: (opens his mouth to speak)
Veggy: (smirks) And don't tell me you're not obsessed with Son-kun because I while I have nothing in my memory banks about
any obsession with him I can tell clearly by what my C drive says about your personality that that is probably what is going
on in your mind right now.
Vegeta: ...
Veggy: (happily) Peep anyone? [holds up a marshmellow peep]
Goku: YAY! [snatches a peep and eats it] MMmmmMMMmmmm...marshmellow-yy.
Chuquita: Cool! Got any yellow ones?
Veggy: [snaps his fingers, causing the peep to appear] Why yes, as a matter of fact I do! [hands the peep to her]
Chuquita: (eats peep) (with her mouth full) Mmm! You make me proud to have created you, Veggy.
Veggy: (cheerfully) Don't talk with your mouth full! Wouldn't wanna get peep juice all over the nice clean table, would you?
Chuquita: (sweatdrop) (swallows) (flatly) I'd like to withdraw my previous statement.
Veggy: Anyone else for a peep?
Vegeta: (snorts) No.
Veggy: (hears a sniffing sound behind him and glances to his right to see the camera-man)
Camera-man: [from behind his camera] Umm, hi, uhh [staring at the peep, then at the happy people enjoying them, then back
at the peep] May I have a--a--
Veggy: [whips the camera off the cameraman's shoulder] (happily) MIRAI! (grins & leaps to his feet) Just as dirty as ever
I see! [pulls out his duster]
Mirai: [backs up] (paranoid/suspicous/nervous) STAY AWAY FROM ME, 'ANDROID'! I HAVE MY SWORD! [taps the object on his back]
Veggy: (smiles) Which you probably haven't cleaned since the last time I saw you, have you Mirai?
Mirai: ...uh... [flicks a bug off his sword case]
Veggy: (cheerfully) That's alright! Have a peep! [hands him a peep]
Mirai: (cheers) WOO-HOO! [shoves said peep in his mouth] MMMM, peepy.
Veggy: Care for some more? [holds LARGE plate full of peeps over his head, which happens to be just at Mirai's neck]
Mirai: YEAH! [reaches to grab some]
Veggy: Nuh-uh-uh! What do we say?
Mirai: (grits his teeth) Yes, PLEASE.
Veggy: Alrighty! There ya go! [hands the plate to Mirai, who sits on the floor and starts gobbling them up in a saiyajin-like
fashion] He's such a nice boy.
[Chu & Co. sweatdrop]
Chuquita: Uh, yeah, nice.... [turns to audiance] OH! Before we get to the Quotes thingy I just want to say that to anyone
else who wants to ask Veggie a question you're gonna have to wait till another time if we ever do that again. All questions
for Veggie that were in the reviews at the time we did that mini-segment got answered. Sorry to anyone who missed the
dead-line. We're done answering Veggie-questions. However we might do an Ask Goku mini-segment somewhere in the future.
Goku: (grins) But not now.
Vegeta: (curious) (to Chu) If someone wishes to anonymously send a letter to Kakarrotto-chan but does not desire for
Kakay to know his true identity may he do so without his peasant and future servant-maid finding out?
Chuquita: (sweatdrops) Uhh, yeah, sure he may, Vedge.
Vegeta: (grins) YAY!
Chuquita: (to audiance) And now for our feature End Corner special-mini-segment called "Quotes from Then that would Never
Work Now!"
Vegeta: (confused)
Chuquita: (happily) [points to Veggie] You should be! This mini-segment will showcase some quotes from stories written
"back in the day" that would be downright laughable if I were to use them now. This first one's from Veggie from the
first part to my first story.
Q.F.T.T.W.N.W.N: "Alright Kakorot! I gave you a warning last night, and if you think you're going to devour all my
family's nurishment then I have no choise but to final flash your @$$ to the next dimention!"
Vegeta: (curious) (to Chu) DID I ever get to final fl--
Chuquita: (bluntly) --no, no you didn't. (to audiance) There are several things wrong with this quote other than my
poor grammer. Veggie's obvious rage against Son-San, the use of the symbol-created curse word (I rarely ever use
that language in my fics) and the fact that I actually used "to the next dimension" (feeling embarassed) I can't believe I
actually used that old Funi-phrase.
Vegeta: But I didn't get to final fl--
Chuquita: (sweatdrops) I said no already, Vedge. Would you do it now if I gave you permission?
Vegeta: (glances over at Goku)
Goku: (tiny smile)
Vegeta: (murmurs) Not even if you paid me.
Goku: AWWW, VEGGIE LOVES ME!
Vegeta: (shrieks) I NEVER SAID THAT!!
Chuquita: Next quote!
Q.F.T.T.W.N.W.N: "I really can't believe that man sometimes. " Bulma groaned, " He takes such delight in seeing Goku
in pain".
[all stare at Veggie]
Vegeta: (innocently) Who? ME?!
Goku: (blinks) (laughs it off) NAW! Little Veggie loves me to much to wanna hurt me!
Vegeta: (smirks) It all depends on the meaning of the word 'hurt'. (sneaky little giggle)
Chuquita: (sweatdrop) Umm, I'll just ignore that little comment and move on. This oldie's from chibi Goten.
Q.F.T.T.W.N.W.N: "5, 6, 7, 8, uh, Bra, what comes after 8?"
Goku: (raises his hand) I KNOW! I KNOW! It's 9!
Chuquita: That and I no longer call her Bra, which is the shortened version of Bura's name. During one summary of my
7 official fanfic (which never made it to the end of part one and thus is not on fanfiction.net) I had Veggie accidentally
getting turned into a toddler, which at the time wasn't nearly as widely used a plotline as it is now, almost 2 years into
the future. Bura supposedly was trying to play mommy to baby-Veggie and after the summary ended up with the weird phrase
"maternal Bra", I sweatdropped at the odd double-meaning and have been calling her Bura ever since. Not to mention Goten
has gotten MUCH smarter since this story was written. Speaking of Bura, here's Quote #4.
Q.F.T.T.W.N.W.N: "Does Freezer scare you Toussan? "
" He killed me B-chan. "
" ...oh. " Bura blinked, then grinned, " Don't worry Toussan, this guy isn't like
Freezer, not at all. He's a dictator. "
" You mean director. "
" Same thing. " Bura said, not understanding."
Vegeta: Another person who's intellegence has risen higher over time.
Chuquita: Yeah, a lot of Bura's past cute, naive, sweetness and ability to melt Veggie's heart has gradually shifted into
Son over the years while Bura herself has become a maniacal, more manipulative person when it comes to trying to gain
Veggie's affection. She also balances out Veggie and Goku's relationship. Where Chi-Chi is trying to keep them as far apart
as possible, Bura attempts to do the exact opposite. Veggie, who detests being ordered around, seemingly shifts his own
personality a little to the person's opposite desires when they're trying to rock his and Son's buddyship just to egg them
on because he enjoys being a delinquent. Notice he tries to get closer to Son when Chi-Chi's around and yet freely lets
loose his anger and annoyance with Son's naive-ness when Bura's nearby.
Vegeta: Am I still young enough to considered a delinquent.
Chuquita: ... (blinks) You are now! The third to last quote is (compared to the others) Much newer. In fact I just wrote
it last September. This one's Gohan complaining to Chi-Chi about how Veggie is trying to outdo him in the superhero
business by pulling his "Masked Avenger" thing.
Q.F.T.T.W.N.W.N: "I don't know how Dad could stand him! I know he thought it was funny or cute or
something to have him trying to imitate and defeat him, but to me...it's just ANNOYING! "
" He's not doing anything wrong though, is he? " Chi-Chi asked.
" Well... " Gohan shifted uncomfortably, " ...no. "
" Then there's nothing you can do to stop him. " Chi-Chi shrugged, " I think it's nice
that he's decided to do something to help others instead of feed that ego of his."
Chuquita: The fact that Chi-Chi is saying Vegeta is doing something she thinks is "nice" pretty much sums up the whole
little paragraph.
Vegeta: (evil smirk) I know something we BOTH think is nice--
Chuquita: (Miss Interupt) DON'T.
Vegeta: Hmmph! (pouts)
Chuquita: This one's by Gohan, who's vocabulary at that point in time was too high to even measure it.
Q.F.T.T.W.N.W.N: " Quite. " Gohan grumbled, then turned to Vegeta, " And just what brings you here to our
quaint little abode? From my recent deduction I assume you will be wanting to spar with Father. "
he said, then glanced at Goku, who was now sitting indian style playing with the footies on his
PJ's, " If my hypothosis is correct, you will have to detain from this for approximately 5
minutes to allow father to get himself properly dressed and nurished."
Vegeta: (wide-eyed) That paragraph blew my mind and _I'M_ the smart one.
Goku: (shocked-drooling-state) Duhhhhhhh...
Vegeta: (smacks him) SNAP OUT OF IT, KAKARROTTO!
Goku: Wha-huh? (shakes his head) Gohan sounded so smart just reading what he was saying ruptured a blood-vessel in my brain!
[Chu & Veggie stare at him; conserned]
Chuquita: Really?
Goku: (giggles) NAH! Not really. I was just playing!
Vegeta: *WHEW*! [whips the sweat from his brow]
Chuquita: Here's one last quote. This one's a back-n-forth between Son & Veggie from "Mamamia!"
Q.F.T.T.W.N.W.N: "Vegeta fell out of the straightjacket huffing and puffing heavily, he stood up, a furious
spark in his eyes, " KAKOROT!!! " he screamed at Goku, who just stood there, " I'LL KILL YOU!! "
" Aww Vegeta, no ya won't! " Goku joshed, " You always say that but you never mean it. "
he said as Vegeta folded his arms.
" OF COURSE I MEAN IT!! " Vegeta screamed as Ms. Bejito grabbed her stomach, a pang of
pain appearing.
" No you don't. If you killed me, then you wouldn't have anyone to compete against now
would you? Plus, I think you WANNA be my friend. " Goku grinned sneakily.
" WHAT?! " Vegeta yelped, " HAVE YOU GONE MAD KAKOROT! "
" Nope. I just think you're jealous of Krillin & Gohan & Yamcha & all the others cuz
we're all friends and you're not. " Goku mocked as Vegeta stared at him in disbelief.
" YOU BAKA! " Vegeta screamed, " WHAT IN BLAZES IS WRONG WITH YOU! I DO NOT NEED YOU OR
YOUR WEAK FRIENDS!"
Vegeta: (to Chu) I don't see anything wrong with this quote.
Chuquita: Well, this paragraph was written mere pages before both "Veggie" and "little buddy" were formally introduced to
Goku's vocabulary, Veggie is still calling him "Kakorot" and won't call him Kakarrot/Kakarrotto for another 6 months.
And after several more stories Son-kun will never call Veggie by the term 'friend' instead of 'buddy' ever again.
I'm also using the manga spelling of Krillin (Kuririn) now and this was written at a time when Veggie had no double-motives
about how he feels about "Kakarrotto" so when he's yelping and staring in disbelief up there he's ACTUALLY yelping and
staring in disbelief. Veggie is still at this point disgusted with even the mere thought of being 'friends' with Son.
Goku: (happily) But not anymore!
Chuquita: Hey, did you notice our Veggie's kind of evolved in a similar way over time as the 'real' Veggie has?
Goku: (thinks about it) ...HEY! Chu-sama's RIGHT! Little Veggie used to be a meanie, but now's he's my sweet lil buddy!
Vegeta: (angry) I AM NOT "SWEET"!!
Goku: (lil smile) And in denial about his true self along with his inner sweetness!
Vegeta: This IS my TRUE SELF! (folds his arms, embarassed) AND I HAVE NO "INNER SWEETNESS"!!
Chuquita: Whatever you say Veggie. Btw, if anyone has any interesting tabloid headlines about our saiyajin friends in the
story, be sure to put them in your review and it MAY end up in the story itself!
Goku: Hey Veggie, which came first, the scrambled egg or the sunny-side-up one?
Vegeta: I don't know Kakarrotto, which one.
Goku: Sunny-side-up! Because everyone knows you can't scramble an egg in the dark, silly!
Vegeta: (flatly) ...Kakarrotto you truely amaze me.
Goku: (giggle) Why THANK YOU little buddy Veggie 'o mine!
Chuquita: See you in Part 4 everybody!
Goku: BYE!
E-mail: lac31685@aol.com
By: Chuquita
Quote of the Week: -from "Garfield"
Irma: Does your little buddy there want to order from the children's menu?
Jon: ...
Garfield: ...
Both: WAH-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!
Irma: (sarcasm) And when I TRY to be funny...
Chuey's Corner:
Vegeta: (to Chu) AGAIN with the "little buddy" comments?
Chuquita: (grins) Yeah, you won't believe the number of different places that term turns up.
Vegeta: (flatly) Charming.
Chuquita: OH! I found the first "buddy hugs" incident.
Goku: (grins) Really?
Chuquita: Yeah, in part 2 of my second story "Tastes Like Chicken". Did you know that's also the first time the Kaka-germs
show up? I word I mean, not the germs themselves.
Goku: Wow, my germies are old.
Chuquita: Actually, they're called "Kakorot germs" in that one, and Veggie's first reaction to being buddy-hugged is
"very disgusted and horrified". Son was crying at the time because he couldn't taste anything. Anyways, Part 3's Corners are
going to dedicated to CHANGES!
Veggy: (snaps his fingers and a pie appears) I like changes.
Vegeta: I don't.
Goku: (squeals) PIE! [grabs half of Veggy's pie and starts to chow down] (happily) I forgot he could do that!
Veggy: (proudly) Making pastries appear out of thin air is part of my programing. [cringes as pie and spit from Goku's eating
lands all over his face] Eew. [snaps his fingers and causes a napkin to appear and wipes his pie-stained face]
Chuquita: Several of the main characters of our stories down here at the Corner have changed since we began back on November
20th of 2000. Veggie has gone from plotting to torture and kill Goku to plotting to steal him away from Chi-Chi in order to
make him his "servant-maid to the throne". Goten has gone from being a stupid Ed-like kid (think Ed Edd and Eddy) to acting
very much in character--
Vegeta: That's because you didn't KNOW how his character acted back then so you made something up!
Chuquita: HUSH! (back to audiance) Bura has gone from being a sweet, innocent little girl (yes she was actually like that at
one time) to being an evil manipulating genius who's trying to get our two saiyajins happy together. Gohan has gone from
being an intellectual smarty-pants to being almost completely identical to his animé/manga self. Chi-Chi's gone from not
really caring about Veggie to wanting to choke him, kill him, and let him drown in his own juices.
Vegeta: HA! No kidding.
Chuquita: And last but certainly not least Son-san here has gone from...well...he hasn't changed that much...I'd have to say
Son's definitely gotten more attached to Veggie over the years, but that's about it.
Goku: (hees) Hee, I am an unmoving rock, Chu-sama.
Chuquita: So I guess that's about it for the personality changes. Some people have gone out of character, some have gotten
more in character, and some have just lost their minds and gone of the deep end. (perks up) But that's oh-kay!
Veggy: (cheerful) And I'm oh-kay!
Goku: (burps up pie crumbs) (also cheerful) And I'm oh-kay too!
Vegeta: (Mr. Grumpy-Pants) I'm not oh-kay.
Goku: Aww, poor lil Veggie. [grabs him and plops the ouji on his lap] You can sit here with me til you're feelin better,
alright? [hugs him from behind]
Vegeta: (glowing bright red) (nervous laugh) Heh-heh, heh-heh-heh...
Veggy: Oh dear....(conserned) (to Chu) Is he gonna be alright?
Chuquita: (flatly) I don't think he was ever alright to begin with. (happily) To Part 3 and BEYOND!
Goku: Wave to the audiance little Veggie. [moves the glowing, numb Veggie's arm back and forth]
Summary: Underwear. We all wear it; well--most of us. Bulma decides to invite a famous fashion designer to Capsule Corp. But
what happens when the fashion designer decides Veggie would be perfect for modeling her new line of underwear? Will Veggie
go through with it? Will he make it down the catwalk without blasting the audiance into oblivion? How will Chi-Chi and Goku
react to this one? Will Veggie be able to use his new "underwear model" title to his advantage? And what happens when the
papers suddenly start blasting rumors about his personal life? Find out!
Chuquita: BTW, Today's End Corner will feature quotes from then that would never work now!
Goku: HOORAY!
Veggy: (surprised) You know what that means?
Goku: ... (just as happy) NOPE!
Veggy: Oh...(grins) Neither do I!
[both sweatdrop]
*****************************************************************************************************************************
" Veh-GEEE, I'm scared! " Goku whined as he stared down at the hundreds of people surrounding the bed.
" Don't worry Kakarrotto, all they want to do is ask a few questions. " Vegeta nervously slid off the bed-post and
walked over the middle of the bed. Goku quickly followed him. Vegeta glared down at the crowd, then snatched up one of the
microphones from a reporter, " ALRIGHT NEWSHOUNDS! YOU LISTEN HERE! I AM NOT GOING TO ANSWER OR REPLY TO ANYTHING YOU SAY!
AND NEITHER IS KAKARROTTO! "
" Who's Kakarrotto? " a woman nearly stuck her video-camera in Vegeta's face. The ouji blinked in surprise of the
camera.
" THAT'S KAKARROTTO!!! " he angrily pointed to Goku, who swallowed hard. The bigger saiyajin looked visibly
frightened at the large group of people.
" Uhh, Veggie? " Goku squeaked out.
" Not now, Kakarrot! I'm busy! NOW WHY DON'T YOU PEOPLE LEAVE US ALONE! I SAID I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU!!! " he
yelled at them.
" Are you related to Ms. La Flu's new model, sir? " a man shoved a microphone infront of Goku.
" Nuh, nuh nuh no. I'm not. " Goku gulped.
" IGNORE them Kakarrotto, pretend as if they aren't here at all. " Vegeta closed his eyes and folded his arms.
" Umm, oh-kay. " Goku shifted uneasily.
" Why did you come here with Mr.... "
" Vegeta Oujisama. "
" KAKARROTTO! DON'T GIVE THEM MY NAME!!! " Vegeta screamed.
" But you said they weren't here so if they aren't really here than what's the harm in answering their questions!! "
Goku cried out.
Vegeta sweatdropped.
" Are you planning to model as well? " another reporter asked Goku.
" No. I just came here to make sure little Veggie was gonna be oh-kay so far from home. " Goku looked over at the
smaller saiyajin with consern.
" Excuse me, "little Veggie" did you say? " the same reporter said while scribbling something down in her notepad.
" ERR, KAKARROT SHUT UP! " Vegeta slapped his hands over Goku's mouth, " DON'T FEED THEIR SICK MINDS!!! "
" "Little Veggie", is that a nickname of some sort? " a 4th reporter asked Vegeta.
" Only in Kakarrotto's mind. " Vegeta grumbled.
" So, Kakarrotto? " reporter number 1 said.
" Son Goku. "
" ...who? "
" My name's Son Goku. S-O-N G-O-K-U. " he spelled it out for her.
" Then who's "Kakarrotto". "
" OH, that's me too. Veggie calls me Kakarrotto, but everybody else I know calls me Son Goku. " Goku shrugged happily
" Really, that's VERY interesting. " she looked up at him momentarily.
" That's interesting? Why is that interesting? " Goku exclaimed, " OHHH! Veggie I KNEW we should have listened to
Bulma! I KNEW it! "
" You mean Bulma Briefs of the Capsule Corperation? " a random reporter gawked.
" Yes! She's Veggie's wife! " Goku threw his arms out, frustrated.
The groups' eyes widened in shock and surprise.
" Ms. Briefs is MARRIED?! " the same random reporter's jaw hung open.
" Hai! Bulma and I ALSO happen to have 3 children together! " Vegeta snorted stubbornly, " Mirai, Bura, and Trunks. "
" *cough*cough* Ji-chan *cough*cough*. " Goku interupted.
" I will not speak of that "fusion baby", he doesn't count. " the ouji glared at the other saiyajin.
" *cough* Vejitto can too count *cough* up to 60 I think *cough*cough*. " Goku spat out another couple fake-coughs.
" Will you keep QUIET! " the smaller saiyajin gritted his teeth in anger.
" Wow, " reporter #2 murmured as he went through his notes, " So let me get this straight, Ms. La Flu's newest model
is named Vegeta Oujisama who has been secretly married to Bulma Briefs, Vice President of Capsule Corporation; had 3 children
with her and... " he trailed off, glancing up at Goku as if waiting for him to say something, " Does. Mrs. Briefs know you're
here, Son..Goku is it? "
" Bulma? Nah, I don't think she knows if I'm here or not. Veggie just pulled up in his limo earlier today infront of
my house and said, "Hey Kakarrotto, wanna come to Paris with me?"...and here I am. I didn't really mean to interupt anything,
it's just that I have to make sure my little buddy stays out of trouble, you know? " Goku said, feeling guilty.
" Your "little buddy"? "
" Yeah, a little buddy is...well it's...it's a complicated role but...well a little buddy is someone who is really
really special and that person to me happens to be Veggie! " Goku grinned, trying to sum up what would normally take about an
hour to explain to the media person.
" Really? How long has Mr. Oujisama been your "little buddy"? "
" Umm, gee it's been a lot of years to count and... " Goku bit his lip, trying to think back, " Well let's see, 10
plus 7 would take us back to after we beat Cell, and before that it was 3 and that's when we met Mirai and another year since
Freezer so...HOLY MACKERAL VEGGIE'S BEEN MY LITTLE BUDDY FOR 21 YEARS NOW!!! " the larger saiyajin gasped in shock. He turned
to Vegeta with his eyes bulging out of his head and his jaw hanging almost to the floor. Vegeta just waved back to him
happily.
" How, how long have you and Mrs. Briefs been married Mr. Oujisama? " the reporter asked Vegeta, still nervous from
the shocked expression on Goku's face. The bigger saiyajin quickly went back to counting the years again to see if he had
miscounted somewhere.
" I'd say 19. At least I think it's 19. Bulma's always making me remember these stupid numbers! I know what day of
the year it is so why do I need to know the numbers! It's stupid! " Vegeta complained, racking his own brain for the exact
year, " Now you see with Kakarrot over there it's easy! I'm the prince and he's the peasant! You don't need to know how any
dates! You're BORN into the royal family!! "
" Royal family? What's he talking about? " reporter 3 said to reporter 4, who shrugged.
" I AM THE GREAT AND POWERFUL SAIYAJIN NO OUJI YOU MORONS!! I AM SET TO INHERIT THE ENTIRE PLANET OF BEJITO-SEI which
has so inconviently been blown up for several decades BUT STILL! I, I, I'M HIS RULER!! " he pointed at Goku, who momentarily
paused his 3rd re-count of having the ouji as his little buddy, " YES, I RULE OVER KAKARROTTO HERE!! " Vegeta grabbed one
of the reporter's video cameras, " Do you mind if I borrow this real fast I'm on a roll. "
" Uh, sure. Go ahead. " the reporter scratched her head.
" DO YOU HEAR THAT ONNA!! " Vegeta shouted into the camera he was holding up infront of him, " RULER OF KAKARROTTO'S
PEASANT-ISH EXISTANCE!! THAT'S ME!!! "
" Oh no... " Bulma groaned as she sat on the couch infront of the TV, " Now he's done it! " she picked up the phone
and dialed the Son home, " Hello? Gohan? Chi-Chi? "
" Hello? " a sad, weak voice said on the line.
" Chi-Chi? " Bulma cocked an eyebrow.
" He left, Bulma...I scared him off...and now he's off somewhere with that Ouji doing who knows WHAT to my poor
little Go-chan! "
" I know what he's doing alright. " Bulma said dryly watching Vegeta bad-mouthing Chi-Chi on national television.
" You what? " Chi-Chi's voice instantly sounded back in its normal tone.
" Chi-Chi, pick up the remote and turn on the TV, then turn to channel 54. " Bulma sighed, distressed about what
terrible embarassing headlines would probably be in the tabloids and newspapers by tommorow morning courtesy of her royal
husband.
" Well, alright. " Chi-Chi clicked the remote up a few channels and shrieked to see none-other-than her mortal enemy
boasting into a camera. Goku was sitting behind him counting his fingers. The duo were in the middle of a large bed,
surrounded by newspeople and camera crews.
" GAH! I got 22 this time!!! " Goku yelped as he stared at his hands, " THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!! I NEVER KEEP A LITTLE
BUDDY LONGER THAN 5 YEARS!! Maybe I'm doing the math wrong...Chi-chan what's 10 plus 7 plus 3 plus 1? " he cried into the
camera.
" 21, Go-chan. " Chi-Chi replied to the distressed saiyajin on the screen.
" HEAR THIS ONE, ONNA? I'VE BEEN KAKAY'S LITTLE BUDDY FOR OVER 2 _DECADES_ NOW!! " Vegeta laughed victoriously into
the camera, grabbing Goku and pulling him shoulder-to-shoulder with the little ouji, " AND YOU CAN COUNT ON ME HOLDING THAT
TITLE FOR ANOTHER 2 _CENTURIES_ AS WELL!! " he smiled cheerfully at the bigger saiyajin, " In't that right, Kakay? "
" What are you TALKING about!! Chi-chan don't listen to him!!! " Goku waved his arms in the air, freaking out.
" See Onna? Kakay's afraid that if you find out how much Kakay deeply cares for me you'll tie him up and lock him in
that cage you keep in your basement for 6 months and feed him nothing but table scraps and crumbs from the trash can like
the evil witch you are? " he snickered, grabbing Goku's arm and clinging to it.
" But Veggie, my house doesn't HAVE a basement!!! " Goku exclaimed.
" Vegeta you're a dead man. " Bulma shook her head, groaning, " In front of all those people...poor SON-KUN! Poor
ME!!! "
" *RING*RING*RING*! "
" Ahh, right on time. " Vegeta smirked, casually whipping out his cellphone, " Hello? You've reached the saiyajin on
ouji, ruler of Kakay's little Kaka-world, how may I help you? "
" OUJI!!! WAIT'LL-I-GET-MY-HANDS-ON-YOU-I'LL-RIP-YOU-LIMB-FROM-LIMB-YOU-DISGUSTING-LITTLE-CREATURE-OOH-HOW-I-HATE-YOU
-USING-MY-GO-CHAN-LIKE-THIS-HE-NEVER-DID-ANYTHING-TO-YOU-I-SWEAR-I-OUGHTA-- "
" Heh. " Vegeta placed his hand over the mouth of the phone, temporarily silences Chi-Chi's threatening screams. He
looked up at the bigger saiyajin, " Hey Kakay, guess who's on the phone? "
" Who Veggie? " Goku said, a bit pale.
" It's Onna. And she says she's going to kill you the next time she sees you because she's so mad that you care more
for me than her smelly Onna-self. " Vegeta mocked.
" NO! CHI-CHAN WOULD NEVER SAY A THING LIKE THAT ABOUT ME! SHE'D NEVER WANNA HURT ME!! " Goku shrieked, horrified.
" DON'T YOU LIE TO HIM OUJI!!! " Chi-Chi screamed into the phone.
" Don't worry Onna, I'll take VERY GOOD "care" of him. What's that? Give me your blessing? How very quaint of you? "
Vegeta carried on with his own little conversation while Chi-Chi was busy ranting her head off into the phone. He turned to
the group of people, " By the way you hollywood-obsessed bakayaroes, Kaka-chan and his attempted murderess live at house #423
in the mountain area. The phone number is 555-KAKA; that's 555-5252 for all you letter-impaired reporters. Onna's private
line is 555-6789 and Kaka-chan's is 555-1234. His e-mail address is Buddy#1@saiyajins_need_buddies_2.com. "
" How do you KNOW all this stuff! " Goku whispered loudly to him.
The ouji just grinned back at him, " I'm very sneaky. "
" WHERE DID YOU SAY MRS. SON'S HOUSE IS LOCATED? " a reporter in the back of the room shouted.
" 423 MOUNTAIN AREA!! " Vegeta shouted back.
" THANKS! " the reporter raised his hand, then instantly rushed out of the room, quickly followed by the rest of the
news-hungry writers. Goku sighed with relief and fell down onto the bed on his back. La Flu was laying on the floor,
twitching in pain due to having people stand and run overtop of her.
" Oww....my spine... " she whinced, still twitching.
" Little Veggie....are they...gone? " Goku shivered, staring up at the ceiling.
" Why yes my future servant-maid, I believe they are. " Vegeta smirked, peering down at him.
" Ohh, good.. " Goku closed his eyes and smiled peacefully. The ouji let out a small giggle, then layed down on his
back beside him for a good 10 seconds. Goku's eyes suddenly shot open, " OH NO!! MY HOUSE!!! " he shrieked, leaping off the
bed. Vegeta growled detestfully, then snorted and got off the bed as well. He snapped his fingers in defeat.
" OH VEGGIE MY HOUSE!! THEY'RE GOING TO MY HOUSE AND THEY'RE GONNA GET THEIR DIRTY LITTLE RUMOR-SPREADING PAWS ALL
OVER MY STUFF AND--Chi-chan? OH NO CHI-CHAN'S IN TROUBLE AND IT'S ALL MY FAULT FOR COMING BACK HERE! WHAT AM I SAYING! I
SHOULD HAVE NEVER COME BACK HERE IN THE FIRST PLACE OH VEGGIE WHAT AM I GONNA DO!! " he nervously bit his nails, " HA! I've
got it! " a cartoon-ish light-bulb appeared over Goku's head, signaling an idea, " I'll teleport back home, then teleport
Chi-chan AND my home somewhere else! I'M BRILLIANT!! "
" You mean you're gonna leave your little buddy all alone in this faraway place all by himself with no one to hug? "
Vegeta fake-sniffled. Goku froze and looked over at the ouji, who now had fake-tears welling up in his eyes.
" I, I, Veh, Veggie I won't be gone long. Just long enough to save Chi-chan and then I'll, I'll-- "
" --come back for me? "
" YEAH! " the larger saiyajin said comfortingly as he patted Vegeta on the head.
" But, but what if you DON'T come back for me? What if you forget about me forever? I'll end up in a cold dark alley
someplace with no one to turn to!! " he exclaimed over-dramatically.
" No one? " Goku's expression saddened.
" And I'll just starve seeing how little I am and how hard it is to steal food around here from the RATS-- "
" Little Veggie...STARVE? " Goku's eyes watered as well.
" That's right, STARVE! And winter is on it's way too-- "
" --Veggie it's August. "
" SHADDUP!! " Vegeta snapped at the interuption to his little monologue. He quickly switched back to feeling sorry
for himself, " And there I'll be cold and alone...without something NICE and BIG and WARM to keep me from freezing in the
harsh winter air. I'll probably catch pneumonia and end up dying a COLD LONELY death ALONE with no one there to hold me in
their arms and keep me warm with their body heat. And after I've been stiff for a while the RATS will come and steal some new
food for their pathetic rodent meals, MY DEAD DECAYING _LONELY_ CARCASS!!! " he cried, falling onto the bed.
" NO! NO NO NO NO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! "
Goku wailed, grabbing Vegeta and hugging him while sobbing into the prince's shirt, " VEGGIE I'D NEVER LET THAT HAPPEN TO YOU
YOU KNOW THAT!!! " he sobbed in heavy guilt. An evil smirk worked its way around Vegeta's face and he snickered a couple
times, " I LOVE MY CUTE LITTLE BUDDY TOO MUCH TO LET HIM CATCH PE-NEMONINA AND DIE AND GET EATEN BY RATS!!! " Goku cried,
the terrifying images Vegeta had concocted from his story still fresh in Goku's mind.
" Ahh, so I'm 'cute' now too, eh? " Vegeta cracked his knuckles behind the still sobbing Goku's back.
" Veggie's always been cute. Veggie knows that. " Goku sniffled, attempting to calm down.
" Yes, indeed. " Vegeta smirked, " So, will Kakarrotto stay here with his little buddy until he is finished with this
little underwear gig of his? "
" Yes Veggie. " Goku set Vegeta back on the ground, " Yes yes yes a thousand times yes! " he rubbed his still teary
eyes, " But, what am I gonna do about Chi-chan? "
" Oh she'll manage. Why that Onna's probably beating them off with a stick by now! " he shrugged.
" Really little Veggie? " Goku smiled.
" Hmm, no, probably not. If I know Onna she's more likely throwing bombs and blasting them with her bazooka. " Vegeta
recalled dryly. He grinned, " You know what Kakarrotto, after what just happened here with those papa-razzis I think I can
pull this underwear thing off and still hold onto my pride! "
" Hooray! Veggie is confident again! " Goku grinned, back to his normal cheery self.
" Great! " La Flu said, finally able to stand up again, " Because we're going to need you back out there in a few
hours for the rest of the show! The evening portion I mean! "
" There's more? " Vegeta's shoulders dropped, " You mean I haven't even gotten past Contract task number 1!!! " he
gawked.
" Nope! Now let's get going and find some proper-sized costumes for you to wear! " she smiled, leaving the room.
" Undie-shopping for Veggie! Undie-shopping for Veggie! " Goku chanted happily, skipping out of the room after her.
Vegeta groaned, " I hate this job....again. "
" I hate that Ouji....again. " Chi-Chi muttered as she hid in her house. All the doors had been locked shut, the
blinds down, the windows securely locked, " How many times can I say I hate him before something is actually DONE about it! "
she hissed. The troops of media personel were now crowded around the Son home. Gohan and Goten, who were still unaware of
the goings-on; along with Videl; were sitting in the living room watching TV.
" Hey Kaasan why'd you close all the blinds? It's dark in here? " Gohan asked, looking over his shoulder. The trio
was sitting on the couch.
Chi-Chi walked past them and peeked out one through the blinds on one of the windows in the living room, then whinced
and quickly shut it, " OHHHHHH! STUPID OUJI!!! "
" What'd he do this time? " Gohan groaned, tired.
" Ugh, the Ouji's become a European Underwear Fashion Model and has dragged Go-chan to Paris with him, bad-mouthed me
on national television, and told a large group of news-reporters where our house is and they are currently standing around
our home waiting to "interview" me and take pictures of the "underground basement dungeon" I keep Goku locked up in. "
Chi-Chi folded her arms.
" I must be getting used to you people because for some odd reason nothing Vegeta does surprises me anymore. " Videl
shook her head and groaned.
" Uncle Veggie can be very weird sometimes! " Goten grinned at her.
" Tell me about it. " she rolled her eyes.
" Umm, Kaasan, we don't HAVE an underground basement dungeon. " Gohan cocked an eyebrow.
" The reporters think we do. You know that evil little Ouji told them everytime Goku mentions his name that I lock
him up in this little cage in the basement and feed him table scraps! How absurd!! " Chi-Chi said in disgust.
" Table scraps? " Videl blinked.
" Vegeta's got a good imagination, so sue me! But that doesn't mean he had to send those people over here! " she
exclaimed, " And now I have to go out there and EXPLAIN myself to them!!! "
" You mean the paparazzi? " Videl asked, " Oh that's simple. " she shrugged.
" SIMPLE!!! HOW IS IT SIMPLE!!! " Chi-Chi shrieked, " I CAN'T TALK TO THEM! THEY ONLY HEAR BITS AN PIECES AND SPREAD
THEM OUT INTO RUMORS!!! "
" Exactly! Just do what my Dad does when HE gets bombarded with news reporters about rumors! " Videl smiled, " Talk
about the other guy. "
" The, "other guy"? " Chi-Chi looked at her inquizzitively.
" Yeah, if your, umm, competitor talks bad about you, just talk back about how bad a person HE is and all the
HORRIBLE things he's done. Heck, you can even make up a few rumors of your own, I guess. "
" Videl...THAT'S GENIUS!!! " Chi-Chi grinned victoriously, then shook her hand, " I'm proud to have you as my future
daughter-in-law! " she turned to Gohan, " Good job Gohan! " the older saiyajin sweatdropped. She turned back to Videl, " I
know he's going to be good hands! Now if you'll both excuse me I'm going to prepare to meet the press! " Chi-Chi said
victoriously, marching out of the room, " WATCH FOR ME ON CHANNEL 73, KIDS!! "
Videl groaned, " What have I done... "
Gohan peered over the couch at her; facefaulted, " More like what have WE done... "
" GREETINGS LADIES AND GENTLEMEN OF THE PRESS!! " Chi-Chi said proudly as she stood on the pedistal CNN had provided
her with infront of her house, " AS YOU MAY KNOW I AM SON CHI-CHI, SON GOKU; or as that slimy evil little ouji refers to him
as, Kakay; HOWEVER YOU MAY NOT KNOW THAT A GREAT DEAL OF WHAT THE "EVIL ONE" HAS SAID TO YOU, IS A LIE! A BIG FAT PROTRUDING
ZIT OF A TALE UPON WHICH I WILL PLUCK WITH THE TWEEZERS OF TRUTH UNTIL IT EXPLODES AND VOMITS BACK IN YOUR FACES---ESPECIALLY
YOURS--OUJI!! "
" Is it just me, or is this about to get ugly? " Gohan stared at the TV screen, mortified.
" It's about to get ugly. " Videl paraphrased him with a similar expression on her face.
" Look Gohan! Mommy's on TV! " Goten chirped happily.
" Yes, Goten, yes she is. " he covered his eyes with his hands, then slowly tore them away and forced himself to
watch, just to make sure Chi-Chi didn't say anything about him.
" The OUJI says that I keep my Go-chan CAPTIVE in some CAGE in the basement when he merely mentions that creatures
NAME! That OBVIOUSLY, is a LIE. I have no basement, no cage, and I would never abuse my own husband to save him from that
Ouji's wicked clutches!!! " she pounded her fist on the podium desk, " You see, *sniffle* I am not the VILLAIN in this
TWISTED little game called life, HE IS! *sob* You see, when my sweet little Gohan was only a mere 5 years old that MONSTER
came to Earth from outer space in order to destory our planet! His LACKEY eventually killed several of our friends during the
invasion, including my baby's own mentor, Piccolo. "
" Heeheehee, Gohan's a baby. " Goten giggled at the TV, then pointed and laughed at his brother. Gohan moaned and
held each side of his head.
" After my husband, SON GOKU; not "Kakay"; arrived he thoroughly pounded that large brute to a plup. When he told
that Ouji to leave and take the giant with him, instead of leaving he, he KILLED HIM! KILLED HIS OWN PARTNER! " she broke
into an overdramatic sob.
" My God! Gohan your Mom's as big a ham on TV as Vegeta is! " Videl gawked.
Gohan muttered, " I noticed. "
" And after that evil incarnate and my Go-chan exchanged blows poor Goku made the BIGGEST MISTAKE of his LIFE! He let
Vegeta LIVE!! He let him GET AWAY! WHY you ask? Because he wanted to FIGHT HIM AGAIN! Of all the STUPID ideas! And then he
ends up meeting that Ouji in space, apparently from what I've heard the Ouji helped him get better after some battle or
another and then got KILLED! Now you may think, oh hooray! JOY! RAPTURE! He's finally dead! But NO, if there's one thing I've
learned after battling that monster for so many years it's that he never TRUELY dies. Like some kind of otherworldy evil that
cannot rest until he has wooed my Go-chan away from me and into his CLUTCHES!!! It was after Goku got well that he made the
next two BIGGEST MISTAKES OF HIS LIFE!!! He dubbed the Ouji has his newest "little buddy" and destroyed the tyrant that had
enslaved the Ouji since he was a child. Of course the stupid little prince had no idea what the title Goku had bestowed upon
his SMELLY UNWORTHY HEAD meant so he ends up spending his first 6 months as a visitor at Capsule Corp SKIPPING and FROLICKING
around the premises as if he's the luckiest little Ouji in the land. "
" Frolicking? HIM?! " Videl glanced over at Gohan for an answer.
" Vegeta was just plain happy to be alive. He thought Toussan was dead and he was the "strongest in the universe". "
" Yeah that makes more sense to me, I guess. " she folded her arms.
" He and Kaasan were actually pretty good friends until he found out Toussan was alive and went out after him. By the
time he got back he and Kaasan were mortal enemies. " Gohan sighed.
" I...can't see them as friends. " Videl shook her head.
" Believe me, you don't want to. It's just plain creepy. It was creepy to watch then and it's creepy to think back
and remember watching it to begin with. "
" ...he was gone for a WHOLE YEAR! " Chi-Chi continued on the TV set, " And the next time I saw him he was wearing
that bright pink golf shirt and those yellow pants and those disgusting bowling shoes and hugging onto my Go-chan for DEAR
LIFE!! All the while smirking at me; as if plotting something...something EVIL!! Like MURDER!! "
The crowd gasped.
" Of course he never DID kill me; obviously; but it took us a good 5 to 6 days to kick him out of the house and send
the little demon back packing to Capsule Corp. And ever since that dark day I've been battling his EVILNESS!!! If you had any
idea how OBSSESSED that Ouji is with stealing my Goku! " Chi-Chi started to fake-sob again.
" Umm, exactly how obsessed are we, uh, talking about? " the first reporter to get a word in edgewise squeaked out,
still in shock.
Chi-Chi instantly stopped crying and swiped the microphone out of his hand, " I thought you'd never ask! " she
grinned, then went back into drama-mode, " Vegeta has an entire closet full of clothes. "
" ... " crickets chirped in the backround.
" Wouldja let me finish? " she said flatly.
" Huh? Oh, yeah yeah yeah, sure. " the crowd agreed, nodding their heads like bobble-head dolls.
" He has an entire secret closet full of clothes which are perfectly designed to fit my Go-chan once he ENSLAVES him.
And not just any clothes my friends; may I call you my friends?; I'm talking really peculiar outfits that NORMAL 'saiyajins'
don't wear on a daily basis. A reliable source has told me that he has outfits for Go-chan in there such as some
'sassy French maid' uniform, a 'genie' uniform, a 'peasant' (who hasn't seen that one coming) uniform, a 'spa' uniform, and
several others which I care to not mention infront of any children who may be watching! Not to mention the fact that I've
seen him performing bizarre alien rituals and trying to cast spells over Goku in order to tear him away from me. AND the Ouji
has this life-sized stuffed doll of Go-chan that he pretends is the real Go-chan and puts on little Ouji-plays with it and
dresses it up in the costumes he's keeping for Go-chan and tucks it in bed with him at night!!! "
" Now she's just making stuff up. " Videl sat back in disgust.
" I wouldn't be so sure about that. " Gohan mentioned dryly.
" I know the last one was fake cuz I saw Uncle Veggie stuffing Kaka-chan in that cubby-hole in his ceiling one time
and Uncle Veggie said that Kaka-chan sleeps in the ceiling cubby-hole to keep him safe from anything dangerous that might
come into the room while Uncle Veggie is asleep and unable to save his dolly. " Goten explained.
" He calls the DOLL "Kaka-chan"?! " Gohan sweatdropped.
" Yup. At least that's what he told me his big dolly's name was. " Goten scratched his head.
" So as you can see ladies and gentlemen, I am nothing more than a justice-serving wife trying to protect her Go-chan
from the evil that is Vegeta. *sniff*. " Chi-Chi then perked up, " Now if you'll all follow me back to the Capsule
Corperation I can show you some real evidence to support my story and make all your little tabloids RICH by tommorow morning,
K? "
" RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAA!!! " they cheered. Chi-Chi ran inside.
" Excuse me Gohan, Mommy's got to get one of Toussan's training gi's to compare sizes with that disgusting ouji-wear
Vegeta has created for him. " she cheerfully grabbed a gi out of Goku's room and returned outside where she drove off,
quickly followed by the reporters in their own vehicles.
" FINALLY some peace and quiet! " Gohan sighed with relief.
" Yeah. " Videl agreed.
" So, do you want me to go in the other room so you two can makeout? " Goten asked, a cheesy grin on his face.
Gohan and Videl instantly blushed with embarassment, the two silent for several seconds.
" Umm, "
" Uh.. "
" Maybe it would be a good idea to go after Kaasan, you know, make sure she's oh-kay. " Gohan said uneasily, getting
up.
" Err, yeah. What a great idea! " Videl laughed nervously, following him out the door, " We can use my helicopter to
get there! " she paused, then looked over her shoulder to see Goten waving goodbye with a big grin on his face. The boy was
now nestled infront of the TV with a big bag of peanut m-n-m's in his lap. He popped a candy in his mouth.
" Bye Gohan! Bye Videl! " he waved.
" OOH! " Videl stomped back inside, grabbed Goten by the arm and dragged him out along with her, " Honestly! Like
we're gonna leave you alone infront of the tube stuffing your face with sugar! COME ON GOHAN! " she turned towards him and
shouted, " WE'RE READY! "
" Yeah, I guess you shouldn't leave me alone by myself. You two are gonna be a really responsible Kaasan and Toussan
someday-- " Videl sweatdropped at the comment, " --BOY I'm glad you're not MY parents! " Goten grinned. Both Videl and Gohan
fell the floor animé style.
" I have a feeling this is going to be a LOOOONG ride. " Videl grumbled.
" I hate doing this! I feel like one of Bura's barbie dolls or something!! " Vegeta snarled as he stood outside the
dressing room, " At least her dolls wore something else OTHER than just their UNDERWEAR!!! "
" Stop complaining 'Geta you look great! " La Flu complimented him.
" MY NAME'S NOT 'GETA!! "
" HIS NAME'S NOT 'GETA!! " both Goku and Vegeta snapped at the same time. La Flu sweatdropped. Goku smiled, instantly
cheering up, " His name's little Veggie and Vegeta. And you can't spell either one of those without the VEHHHHHHHH. " he
broke into a grin, " Heehee! "
" Well excuse me or thinking about it but "little Veggie" just isn't a name you would give an underwear model. " La
Flu cocked her head.
" Oh yeah well 'Geta sounds like a dishwashing detergent. You know, like Wisk or Tide or that stuff in the blue
bottle that Chi-Chi always puts in the washing machine. " Goku said from on his knees, making funny faces.
" That's because Wisk and Tide ARE washing machine detergents. You use them for CLOTHES. " Vegeta said, annoyed.
Goku's face paled, " Uh-oh...gee Veggie I wish you had told me that 3 months ago. " he bit his lip, " I was
wondering why whenever I washed the dishes the spoons would smell kinda funny. "
" Remind me not to eat over at your house for a while, Kakarrot. " Vegeta cringed.
" Oh, you won't have to worry about that little Veggie, Chi-chan doesn't want you anywhere near my house anyways! "
Goku started making funny faces again.
The ouji cocked an eyebrow suddenly realizing where Goku was. He looked over his shoulder and shrieked, " WHAT THE
HECK ARE YOU DOING DOWN THERE!!! " his face glowed red brighter than a 120 watt light bulb.
" Making funny faces. " Goku replied innocently, " Look! I can see my reflection in your butt! " he pointed to
Vegeta's present pair of underwear, which was a metalic silver coloring. The smaller saiyajin sweatdropped.
" Kakarrotto, that is NOT funny. " he said flatly. Goku pouted, then looked up at him happily.
" I think it is! "
" THEN GO FIND A SPARE DRESSING ROOM AND MAKE FACES IN THAT!!! NOT IN THE UNDERWEAR I'M WEARING!!! " Vegeta snapped
at him, mortified.
Goku stood up and waddled into the formerly mentioned spare dressing room, " Gosh Veggie you don't have to be so
grumpy all the time! "
" I'm not wearing these! I'm not! I didn't like them the first time and now that Kakarrotto's made 'funny faces'
in them I'm even more sure I will not walk onto that runway in these! " Vegeta snorted, stubbornly folding his arms.
" Well 'Geta at least you're getting used to this, for one thing. " La Flu chuckled.
" Really? And HOW can you tell? " the ouji rolled his eyes.
" You're complaining just like all my other models and you have no more problems with going on the runway. " she
smirked. The saiyajin paused.
" What do you know about that. " he murmured as he walked back into the dressing room, then yelped a moment later
and sent a kick sending Goku flying out of the dressing room, " I SAID A _SPARE_ DRESSING ROOM! AS IN ONE I'M NOT
USING!!! " he shook his fist in the air, then pointed at La Flu, " AND DON'T CALL ME 'GETA!! " he slammed the door shut
behind him.
Goku sat on the ground, smiling up at La Flu, " Is he the BEST little buddy or WHAT! "
La Flu sweatdropped, " Uh--huh... "
" He's been in there trying on stuff for a long time. " Goku pouted as he and La Flu waited outside the dressing
room, " I WANNA SEE MY LITTLE VEGGIE!! " he waved his arms in the air, then sighed and fell onto his back from sitting
down. He glanced over at La Flu, " Say lady? How about you let me be in the underwear show with Veggie? " he looked
up at her with big sparkily eyes.
" Uh, no. " La Flu said flatly.
" Buh y not? " the large saiyajin sniffled.
" You have absolutely no qualifications! "
" My tushie's cute TOO ya know. " Goku hmmphed.
" Whether your "tushie" is cute or not has NOTHING to do with modeling!!...well maybe it has a LITTLE to do
with it, BUT NOT ENOUGH TO GET YOU INTO THE SHOW! "
" Ohh. " Goku hung his head, " I can still stay backstage and root Veggie on though, right? "
" Yes Mr. Son. " she sighed.
" I mean, *giggle* what would you call me anyway, what with YOUR nickname creativity, Oku? Or maybe you'd even
drop the O too and make it just plan 'ol Ku. Pigeons make that sound you know, coo coo coo. I once saw this one
pigeon on TV and-- "
" --TA DA!! " the dressing room door flung open. Vegeta smirked at them, " So! Kaka-chan, whadda think? "
Goku sat up and blinked at his little buddy, who was now wearing a pair of white briefs with many little stringies
hanging from it. The ouji was also wearing a pair of white wrist things similar to Goku's blue ones. He had a second pair
on each of his ankles and had a silver crown sitting at the end of the wider part of his widow's peak. Goku sweatdropped.
" Wow...little Veggie. You look, uhh, well, umm, " he scratched his head, his mind drawing a blank for the word he
wanted to put at the end of his sentence. Vegeta whipped out the cell phone he had used earlier and leaned the phone near
Goku's mouth.
" Would you care to repeat that into the tape recorder, Kakarrotto? " Vegeta asked, amused.
" Veggie that is a cell phone. " Goku pointed to it.
" ...DARNIT! " Vegeta snapped at himself, then glanced up at the larger saiyajin, " So it is, Kakarrotto. So it is. "
he repeated, then backed up into the dressing room, only to re-emerge several seconds later carrying a small tape-recorder,
" Now, Kakarrot. Would you care to repeat that into the TAPE RECORDER? "
" Um, I, I guess little Veggie. " Goku rubbed the back of his head, uneasily. He cleared his throat, " Wow...little
Veggie. You look, uhh, well, umm... " he trailed off. Vegeta clicked the tape recorder off impatiently.
" Gorgeous? Pleasing? godly? Absolutely exquisite and beautiful to behold? " the ouji offered.
" Hmm... " Goku thought for a moment. Vegeta clicked on his tape recorder on again, " Silly! "
" WAH!!! " the small saiyajin fell to the floor animé style, " "SILLY"!!! " he exclaimed, getting up, " I DIDN'T SAY
THAT!!! "
" I know you didn't. I did. "
Vegeta sweatdropped, " Is there ANY OTHER WORD such as one of the ones I offered you that you would use to BETTER
describe your feelings other than 'silly'. " he mocked the last word.
" Mmm...NOPE! " Goku grinned. The ouji stomped almost toe-to-toe with his peasant and held up the tape recorder.
" Kakay, could you do me a favor and giggly say into the tape recorder "Oh V-sama, that is the sassiest most
beautiful pair of underwear I've ever seen on your absolutely perfect body!". "
" V-sama??? " Goku cocked an eyebrow at him.
" ... "
" ... "
" You're kidding...right? "
" JUST SAY THE LINE I'M SUPPOSED TO BE ONSTAGE IN 3 MINUTES!! " Vegeta yelled at him.
" Will it make little Veggie happy? " Goku asked.
" Yes, it will make little Veggie very VERY happy. " Vegeta rubbed his hands together.
" And you're not gonna use it in some mean 'ol trick against Chi-chan...are you lil Veggie? "
" ...NAH! Why would I do something "silly" like that! " Vegeta laughed nervously. Goku opened his mouth, only to have
Vegeta send a death-glare at him, instantly silencing the other saiyajin.
" ...umm, oh-kay. Gimmie the tape player. " Goku sighed, taking the object from the short prince, " Wait, " he
stopped himself before pressing the record button, " You want me to giggle too, right? "
" Yes Kakarrotto. I want you to giggle like you're having the time of your life! As if you're in some kind of
kaka-utopia for a brief period. " Vegeta explained.
Goku shrugged, " Ooo-kay little buddy. " he pressed the record button, " Oh V-sama, that is the sassiest most
beautiful pair of underwear I've ever seen on your absolutely perfect body! " the large saiyajin giggled wildly as he bounced
around the room. Goku clicked the stop button, then grinned and handed the tape recorder back to Vegeta, " Howsat little
buddy? "
" ... " Vegeta held out his shaking, bright red hand and slowly retrieved his tape recorder. He then walked into his
dressing room, still glowing brightly. La Flu and Goku stood there infront of the dressing room door, staring at it for a
moment. Suddenly a wild uncontrolable squeal wailed from inside the dressing room, " AHHHHH-HAHAHAHAHAHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
HEEEEEEEEHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhHHhhhhhhhHHhhh... "
The duo sweatdropped.
Vegeta emerged from the dressing room in a boastful stride; the bright red glow gone from his face. However his hair
was looking much more frizzied than when he had entered. He nodded to Goku, " Thank you Kahhhh.. " a small glow returned to
the ouji's face. Vegeta quickly slapped himself across the face, causing the glow to disappear, " --karrotto. "
" Aww, do not mention it little Veggie. " Goku smiled, " Now just go out there and show off your lil tushie the big
crowd of strangers with cameras! "
Vegeta sweatdropped, " You sure have an odd way of phrasing things, you know that, Kakarrot? "
" Mmm, nooooOOOOoooo. " Goku replied, then flashed a big grin at him.
" Uh-huh. " the ouji said flatly, then headed for the curtains to the runway. He smirked, " Be sure to watch for me,
Kakarrotto! "
" I will peek behind the curtains little Veggie 'o mine! " Goku saluted the ouji, following him to backstage. Vegeta
grabbed ahold of one of the curtains, " Countdown for me, Kaka-chan? "
" You got it! " the larger saiyajin gave him a thumbs-up, " 3, 2, 1-- "
Vegeta flung the curtains aside and paraded out onto the runway, this time welcoming the cheers and camera flashes
of the crowd, " Yes, yes, thank you for recognizing my SUPERIOR body, Earth-people. " he boasted. The crowd only cheered
louder.
" Isn't he great! " La Flu clasped her hands together happily, " 'Geta's just PERFECT for this job! "
" *A-HEM*! " Goku coughed loudly.
" Alright, "Little Veggie". Whichever you prefer. " she shrugged.
" 'Geta sounds like a name for someone who looks like Bulma, not someone who looks like Veggie. " Goku commented,
then lifted his foot only to find something stuck to the bottom of it. He pulled it off his shoe and held it up,
" 'The Globe', August 12th. Hey! This magazine's from today! " Goku chirped, then folded it to see the cover. When the
cover-page came into view he took one look at the bold-lettered headline and shrieked. The saiyajin's face turned a
stark white and a nervous sweat dripped down his face, " Wha-wha-wha-wha-wha-wha-wha-- "
" I'm ba-ack! " Vegeta pushed his hair back in a cocky manner, " Who knew humans had such good taste in saiyajin
physique! I'm beautiful, they know I'm beautiful, and they know how to show their gratitude for it! " he put his hands
on his hips, " You know what Kakarrotto, maybe I should start charging them for the pleasure of gazing their unworthy
eyes upon my heart-throb of a body. "
" I think somebody already did. " Goku muttered in shock, still staring at the magazine.
" What's that? What are you looking at?! " Vegeta demanded, trying to reach Goku by jumping up and down, his
arms waving in the air to grab the magazine. Instead Goku nervously flipped the magazine around and shoved the
cover-image in Vegeta's face.
" Read. " Goku said in a frightened, yet dead-pan voice.
Vegeta blinked, staring at the magazine. He read the headline outloud, " Secret Capsule Corp Supermodel Hubby
Lusts after Mountain Mistress. " he scratched his head, " So? "
Goku shoved Vegeta's head down a little further so his eyes had a clear view of the picture below the headline.
The ouji's eyes widened as big as saucer-pans as the information of what he was looking at reached his brain. He
took one look up at Goku and screamed in horror, " AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! "
*****************************************************************************************************************************
10:22 PM 8/12/2002
END OF PART 3!
Chuquita: (sighs happily) Ahh, if there's one thing I love about fanfiction, it's a good 'ol fashioned cliffhanger.
Vegeta: (narrowing his eyes) You always worry me when you use these.
Veggy: (curious) I'm not worried.
Vegeta: (angrily) THAT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT IN THIS STORY!!!
Veggy: (snorts) That's no reason to get huffy with me "Mr. Obsessive". [folds his arms]
Vegeta: (opens his mouth to speak)
Veggy: (smirks) And don't tell me you're not obsessed with Son-kun because I while I have nothing in my memory banks about
any obsession with him I can tell clearly by what my C drive says about your personality that that is probably what is going
on in your mind right now.
Vegeta: ...
Veggy: (happily) Peep anyone? [holds up a marshmellow peep]
Goku: YAY! [snatches a peep and eats it] MMmmmMMMmmmm...marshmellow-yy.
Chuquita: Cool! Got any yellow ones?
Veggy: [snaps his fingers, causing the peep to appear] Why yes, as a matter of fact I do! [hands the peep to her]
Chuquita: (eats peep) (with her mouth full) Mmm! You make me proud to have created you, Veggy.
Veggy: (cheerfully) Don't talk with your mouth full! Wouldn't wanna get peep juice all over the nice clean table, would you?
Chuquita: (sweatdrop) (swallows) (flatly) I'd like to withdraw my previous statement.
Veggy: Anyone else for a peep?
Vegeta: (snorts) No.
Veggy: (hears a sniffing sound behind him and glances to his right to see the camera-man)
Camera-man: [from behind his camera] Umm, hi, uhh [staring at the peep, then at the happy people enjoying them, then back
at the peep] May I have a--a--
Veggy: [whips the camera off the cameraman's shoulder] (happily) MIRAI! (grins & leaps to his feet) Just as dirty as ever
I see! [pulls out his duster]
Mirai: [backs up] (paranoid/suspicous/nervous) STAY AWAY FROM ME, 'ANDROID'! I HAVE MY SWORD! [taps the object on his back]
Veggy: (smiles) Which you probably haven't cleaned since the last time I saw you, have you Mirai?
Mirai: ...uh... [flicks a bug off his sword case]
Veggy: (cheerfully) That's alright! Have a peep! [hands him a peep]
Mirai: (cheers) WOO-HOO! [shoves said peep in his mouth] MMMM, peepy.
Veggy: Care for some more? [holds LARGE plate full of peeps over his head, which happens to be just at Mirai's neck]
Mirai: YEAH! [reaches to grab some]
Veggy: Nuh-uh-uh! What do we say?
Mirai: (grits his teeth) Yes, PLEASE.
Veggy: Alrighty! There ya go! [hands the plate to Mirai, who sits on the floor and starts gobbling them up in a saiyajin-like
fashion] He's such a nice boy.
[Chu & Co. sweatdrop]
Chuquita: Uh, yeah, nice.... [turns to audiance] OH! Before we get to the Quotes thingy I just want to say that to anyone
else who wants to ask Veggie a question you're gonna have to wait till another time if we ever do that again. All questions
for Veggie that were in the reviews at the time we did that mini-segment got answered. Sorry to anyone who missed the
dead-line. We're done answering Veggie-questions. However we might do an Ask Goku mini-segment somewhere in the future.
Goku: (grins) But not now.
Vegeta: (curious) (to Chu) If someone wishes to anonymously send a letter to Kakarrotto-chan but does not desire for
Kakay to know his true identity may he do so without his peasant and future servant-maid finding out?
Chuquita: (sweatdrops) Uhh, yeah, sure he may, Vedge.
Vegeta: (grins) YAY!
Chuquita: (to audiance) And now for our feature End Corner special-mini-segment called "Quotes from Then that would Never
Work Now!"
Vegeta: (confused)
Chuquita: (happily) [points to Veggie] You should be! This mini-segment will showcase some quotes from stories written
"back in the day" that would be downright laughable if I were to use them now. This first one's from Veggie from the
first part to my first story.
Q.F.T.T.W.N.W.N: "Alright Kakorot! I gave you a warning last night, and if you think you're going to devour all my
family's nurishment then I have no choise but to final flash your @$$ to the next dimention!"
Vegeta: (curious) (to Chu) DID I ever get to final fl--
Chuquita: (bluntly) --no, no you didn't. (to audiance) There are several things wrong with this quote other than my
poor grammer. Veggie's obvious rage against Son-San, the use of the symbol-created curse word (I rarely ever use
that language in my fics) and the fact that I actually used "to the next dimension" (feeling embarassed) I can't believe I
actually used that old Funi-phrase.
Vegeta: But I didn't get to final fl--
Chuquita: (sweatdrops) I said no already, Vedge. Would you do it now if I gave you permission?
Vegeta: (glances over at Goku)
Goku: (tiny smile)
Vegeta: (murmurs) Not even if you paid me.
Goku: AWWW, VEGGIE LOVES ME!
Vegeta: (shrieks) I NEVER SAID THAT!!
Chuquita: Next quote!
Q.F.T.T.W.N.W.N: "I really can't believe that man sometimes. " Bulma groaned, " He takes such delight in seeing Goku
in pain".
[all stare at Veggie]
Vegeta: (innocently) Who? ME?!
Goku: (blinks) (laughs it off) NAW! Little Veggie loves me to much to wanna hurt me!
Vegeta: (smirks) It all depends on the meaning of the word 'hurt'. (sneaky little giggle)
Chuquita: (sweatdrop) Umm, I'll just ignore that little comment and move on. This oldie's from chibi Goten.
Q.F.T.T.W.N.W.N: "5, 6, 7, 8, uh, Bra, what comes after 8?"
Goku: (raises his hand) I KNOW! I KNOW! It's 9!
Chuquita: That and I no longer call her Bra, which is the shortened version of Bura's name. During one summary of my
7 official fanfic (which never made it to the end of part one and thus is not on fanfiction.net) I had Veggie accidentally
getting turned into a toddler, which at the time wasn't nearly as widely used a plotline as it is now, almost 2 years into
the future. Bura supposedly was trying to play mommy to baby-Veggie and after the summary ended up with the weird phrase
"maternal Bra", I sweatdropped at the odd double-meaning and have been calling her Bura ever since. Not to mention Goten
has gotten MUCH smarter since this story was written. Speaking of Bura, here's Quote #4.
Q.F.T.T.W.N.W.N: "Does Freezer scare you Toussan? "
" He killed me B-chan. "
" ...oh. " Bura blinked, then grinned, " Don't worry Toussan, this guy isn't like
Freezer, not at all. He's a dictator. "
" You mean director. "
" Same thing. " Bura said, not understanding."
Vegeta: Another person who's intellegence has risen higher over time.
Chuquita: Yeah, a lot of Bura's past cute, naive, sweetness and ability to melt Veggie's heart has gradually shifted into
Son over the years while Bura herself has become a maniacal, more manipulative person when it comes to trying to gain
Veggie's affection. She also balances out Veggie and Goku's relationship. Where Chi-Chi is trying to keep them as far apart
as possible, Bura attempts to do the exact opposite. Veggie, who detests being ordered around, seemingly shifts his own
personality a little to the person's opposite desires when they're trying to rock his and Son's buddyship just to egg them
on because he enjoys being a delinquent. Notice he tries to get closer to Son when Chi-Chi's around and yet freely lets
loose his anger and annoyance with Son's naive-ness when Bura's nearby.
Vegeta: Am I still young enough to considered a delinquent.
Chuquita: ... (blinks) You are now! The third to last quote is (compared to the others) Much newer. In fact I just wrote
it last September. This one's Gohan complaining to Chi-Chi about how Veggie is trying to outdo him in the superhero
business by pulling his "Masked Avenger" thing.
Q.F.T.T.W.N.W.N: "I don't know how Dad could stand him! I know he thought it was funny or cute or
something to have him trying to imitate and defeat him, but to me...it's just ANNOYING! "
" He's not doing anything wrong though, is he? " Chi-Chi asked.
" Well... " Gohan shifted uncomfortably, " ...no. "
" Then there's nothing you can do to stop him. " Chi-Chi shrugged, " I think it's nice
that he's decided to do something to help others instead of feed that ego of his."
Chuquita: The fact that Chi-Chi is saying Vegeta is doing something she thinks is "nice" pretty much sums up the whole
little paragraph.
Vegeta: (evil smirk) I know something we BOTH think is nice--
Chuquita: (Miss Interupt) DON'T.
Vegeta: Hmmph! (pouts)
Chuquita: This one's by Gohan, who's vocabulary at that point in time was too high to even measure it.
Q.F.T.T.W.N.W.N: " Quite. " Gohan grumbled, then turned to Vegeta, " And just what brings you here to our
quaint little abode? From my recent deduction I assume you will be wanting to spar with Father. "
he said, then glanced at Goku, who was now sitting indian style playing with the footies on his
PJ's, " If my hypothosis is correct, you will have to detain from this for approximately 5
minutes to allow father to get himself properly dressed and nurished."
Vegeta: (wide-eyed) That paragraph blew my mind and _I'M_ the smart one.
Goku: (shocked-drooling-state) Duhhhhhhh...
Vegeta: (smacks him) SNAP OUT OF IT, KAKARROTTO!
Goku: Wha-huh? (shakes his head) Gohan sounded so smart just reading what he was saying ruptured a blood-vessel in my brain!
[Chu & Veggie stare at him; conserned]
Chuquita: Really?
Goku: (giggles) NAH! Not really. I was just playing!
Vegeta: *WHEW*! [whips the sweat from his brow]
Chuquita: Here's one last quote. This one's a back-n-forth between Son & Veggie from "Mamamia!"
Q.F.T.T.W.N.W.N: "Vegeta fell out of the straightjacket huffing and puffing heavily, he stood up, a furious
spark in his eyes, " KAKOROT!!! " he screamed at Goku, who just stood there, " I'LL KILL YOU!! "
" Aww Vegeta, no ya won't! " Goku joshed, " You always say that but you never mean it. "
he said as Vegeta folded his arms.
" OF COURSE I MEAN IT!! " Vegeta screamed as Ms. Bejito grabbed her stomach, a pang of
pain appearing.
" No you don't. If you killed me, then you wouldn't have anyone to compete against now
would you? Plus, I think you WANNA be my friend. " Goku grinned sneakily.
" WHAT?! " Vegeta yelped, " HAVE YOU GONE MAD KAKOROT! "
" Nope. I just think you're jealous of Krillin & Gohan & Yamcha & all the others cuz
we're all friends and you're not. " Goku mocked as Vegeta stared at him in disbelief.
" YOU BAKA! " Vegeta screamed, " WHAT IN BLAZES IS WRONG WITH YOU! I DO NOT NEED YOU OR
YOUR WEAK FRIENDS!"
Vegeta: (to Chu) I don't see anything wrong with this quote.
Chuquita: Well, this paragraph was written mere pages before both "Veggie" and "little buddy" were formally introduced to
Goku's vocabulary, Veggie is still calling him "Kakorot" and won't call him Kakarrot/Kakarrotto for another 6 months.
And after several more stories Son-kun will never call Veggie by the term 'friend' instead of 'buddy' ever again.
I'm also using the manga spelling of Krillin (Kuririn) now and this was written at a time when Veggie had no double-motives
about how he feels about "Kakarrotto" so when he's yelping and staring in disbelief up there he's ACTUALLY yelping and
staring in disbelief. Veggie is still at this point disgusted with even the mere thought of being 'friends' with Son.
Goku: (happily) But not anymore!
Chuquita: Hey, did you notice our Veggie's kind of evolved in a similar way over time as the 'real' Veggie has?
Goku: (thinks about it) ...HEY! Chu-sama's RIGHT! Little Veggie used to be a meanie, but now's he's my sweet lil buddy!
Vegeta: (angry) I AM NOT "SWEET"!!
Goku: (lil smile) And in denial about his true self along with his inner sweetness!
Vegeta: This IS my TRUE SELF! (folds his arms, embarassed) AND I HAVE NO "INNER SWEETNESS"!!
Chuquita: Whatever you say Veggie. Btw, if anyone has any interesting tabloid headlines about our saiyajin friends in the
story, be sure to put them in your review and it MAY end up in the story itself!
Goku: Hey Veggie, which came first, the scrambled egg or the sunny-side-up one?
Vegeta: I don't know Kakarrotto, which one.
Goku: Sunny-side-up! Because everyone knows you can't scramble an egg in the dark, silly!
Vegeta: (flatly) ...Kakarrotto you truely amaze me.
Goku: (giggle) Why THANK YOU little buddy Veggie 'o mine!
Chuquita: See you in Part 4 everybody!
Goku: BYE!