Hi! *Has returned yet again to redo another chapter* Okay, I know that this whole storyline has been furiously overdone. But I wrote one of the first ones, I swear to God I did! ^^; Ask my darling Aqua Princess, she called it a pioneer fic. ^_^ I love you! But anyway, I hope you like it! *Hugs Chibi-Angel, both of us gazing at whomever you may be pleadingly*

Chapter One
The Letter That Ended It All...
Or is it Just Beginning?

Usagi flung various articles of clothing into her partially full suitcase hurriedly, her moonlight blue eyes sparkling with tears. She told herself she should be angry; she should be raging. And yet all she felt was pain and regret.

"I don't care," she informed herself with passionate fury she wasn't even close to feeling. "I don't need him…And I don't need the Senshi, either."

~*Flashback*~

"How could you, Sailor Moon?" Mars hissed up at her as she held the other fallen blonde in her arms. "How could you hurt Venus?"


Usagi backed away, her hands pressed to her dramatically paled cheeks. "I didn't!" she gasped, horrified at the suggestion. "I mean, I didn't-I didn't mean to-I just--The tiara-and the youma dodged-and it-it hit-Minako-chan! It was an accident--It-it was!" she screamed when she saw how the other scouts were looking at her—excluding the unconscious Minako.

""How could you?" Sailor Mars hissed up at her as she cradled the unconscious Minako in her arms. "How could you hurt Venus?"

"What?" Usagi blurted, horrified, backing away with her palms pressed to her dramatically paled cheeks. "I didn't! How could

you even—?!"

"We all saw you fling the tiara at her!"

"I d—didn't!" The blonde insisted, pulling her hands away from her face and immediately seizing fistfuls of her long golden hair. She tugged at it, unable to keep her hands still, blue eyes huge in her horrified face. "I mean—I didn't—I didn't mean to—I just—the tiara—and the youma dodged—and it-it hit-Minako-chan!" She couldn't control the way the words tumbled out, faster and faster as though they were crushing her lungs more with every passing second. Tears were starting to streak down her face quickly, zigzagging across her smooth ivory cheeks. Every time the shaken teenager went to brush them away, fresh ones coursed down instantly. "It was an accident…" She finally murmured, followed by an abrupt scream when she saw how the Senshi were looking at her. "It-it was! Oh my God…Oh my God… You think I did this on purpose." The words came out on a moan as she fell to her knees, staring at the muddy ground in silent agony.

"Sailor Moon—Usagi…" Makoto said stiffly, and it was confusing, and painful, to hear the usually overly cheerful cook sound like that. "We-we can't—Usagi, you're out."


"What?" Usagi choked out in horror, salty tears slipping into her mouth. "But-you can't do that! I'm the leader!"

"We're so sorry, Usagi-chan... But once you start hurting us..." Ami murmured, looking ready to cry at the confrontation alone.

Usagi  looked desperately in their familiar faces for a trace of friendliness, searching desperately for the warmth she knew flickered within. But all the girls stared back at her with bitter iciness.


"You can't-!" She turned and ran down the street, her loud sobs echoing back to them. Usagi was a crybaby…But none of them had ever heard her cry like that.


Sailor Chibi Moon shivered. "Maybe we shouldn't have…?"

~*End Flashback*~

They hurt me…Usagi recognized with burning grief. She seized her suitcase, left Chibi Usa a note on the stairs leading to her attic bedroom, and fled the house—forever.

~*~*~*~


"Senshi! Come over to the house, now!" Chibi Usa's voice crackled franticly through four communicators, accompanied by a wave of static. Frightened by the desperateness in the small girl's voice, less then fifteen minutes later the inner Senshi were all accounted for—except for Usagi, of course. All were a little nervous, although no one had the vaguest idea why.

They all noticed the tears brimming in Chibi Usa's eyes at the same time. Large, clear rubies of eyes that were painfully similar to Usagi's, despite the variations in color.
 
"What's wrong, Chibi Usa-chan?" Minako inquired gently, cradling the broken arm Sailor Moon's tiara had resulted in.


But Chibi Usa held up a small hand.

"No, we have to wait." She answered, and it could have been Ami's imagination, but she was sure she saw a glare buried in the cheerful depths of red. "We have to wait for Mamoru." Lost in impatience and worry, no one seemed to notice that for the first time since she'd came, Chibi Usa didn't call him Mamo-chan. Luckily, he himself burst through the door at that very second.


"Okay, Chibi Usa, tell us." Raye commanded quietly. She knew something was wrong—you didn't need to be a priestess to tell that-but she could tell it was worse that the other scouts suspected.


The pink-haired girl held up a letter. "Mamoru…Why don't you read it?" It seemed as though there was a bit of malicious intent lurking behind her sugary sweet tone, but surely that couldn't be. Chibi Usa would never want to hurt Mamoru. She was every bit as loyal to him…as Mamoru was to Usagi.


Mamoru stared at her for a moment, trying to decipher her tone, but eventually took the several sheets and began to read them aloud.

"Dear Scouts, Chibi Usa-chan… and Mamoru.
Yo

You have all made it very clear to me that I am not wanted here. Please don't worry… I don't blame you.

I definitely have not been the best friend. Nor have I taken or done my responsibilities as leader and disguised mother as responsibly as I now see I should have. As well, it has to come to my attention that apparently I've been a horrible girlfriend.

As stated, I don't blame you, and so please don't let you blame you. I still love you all very much…But you've all hurt me deeply. Because of this, I doubt that I will ever return.

"To Mamoru:


I tried to be the best girlfriend I could, honestly, I did. I read the magazine articles and did what they said, I saw you often because friends told me avoiding you would be losing you, and I hung on every word you said. Just like the magazine articles said a man likes about a girl. But as usual, I failed miserably." At this point Mamoru's voice broke, cracking slightly, but he looked at Chibi Usa and frowned, then continued reading.

"It seems that I've failed all I've tried to do. I don't blame you for dumping me and going out with that gorgeous girl. She'll love you better than I ever could…Even if we were destined to be together..."

It seemed to Minako that Usagi's daughter looked distinctly pleased with herself as little by little Mamoru's face crumpled, and by the sounds of this letter, she was beginning to understand why. Usagi and Chibi Usa didn't always get along—in fact, they never got along—but when it all came down to it, the two were fiercely loyal to each other above all else.

"To Minako."  And here the present blonde straightened and listened carefully.


"You were my best friend, Minako… I'm so, so sorry-I truly never meant to hurt you. That stupid youma moved and I accidentally hit my best friend. It hurt me, Minako-chan. But I love you-even though it was because of me hitting you that the whole
 thing started. Again-I'm sorry. So sorry. But I didn't teach myself to be like this, did I? No, it must have been some of my so-called—excuse me, my friends...^_^; Clumsy me, the pen slipped."

Minako's mouth dropped open.

"To Rei:


I know that you never meant to cause me any pain. Don't worry, I understand that it was all intended as a joke. I'm sorry I was so mean to you so many times. You know it was all a joke, right? I'm sure you do. Don't blame yourself, pyro. You didn't chase me away-even if you did contribute to the factor in the end. I'm sure you didn't mean it-right? Well, maybe you did. I am a whiny crybaby and I didn't deserve such supposedly great friends..."

Rei's eyes lowered, and a tear slipped unchecked over her cheek. What had they done to Usagi? She sounded so different in this horrible letter…

"To Makoto:


Well, what can I say? Never blame yourself. You had nothing to do with me leaving--even if you were the one who kicked me out of the scouts...
You're a-ahem-great friend, Mako-chan. Really. Honest, I'm not just saying that..."

Makoto's teeth gritted and she punched the wall, though her eyes looked suspiciously shiny as well.

"Ami-


Oh, Ames. Sure, you're the one who implied that I tried to hurt Minako-chan, but still... Oh, don't worry. I'm positive-okay, almost positive-that you didn't mean a word of it. I mean, you were probably just worried about your friend...
I guess...

"Chibi Usa…"

 Thank you so much for trying to stand up for me after I left. I'm sorry for leaving you alone, especially with—well, never mind that. I'm sorry, Mesume-chan…I'm just an idiot. God…Please, please don't forget me. I promise when we meet again—and we will, because I can't stand the thought of you growing up with—er…Anyway, we'll have ice cream together, I promise. My beautiful little daughter…Please wait for me? There are so many memories. Can you forgive me for taking off? I have to save me from myself.

Please forgive me… Trust me, I'll be fine

Ai shiteru.

"Mamoru…


I know I've written to you already in this letter, but I have more to say. Stop reading this outloud-Damn, how'd she do that?"

 
The other scouts shrugged. He looked back down and started to read silently.

Stop asking the other scouts how I did that, Mamoru, and start reading.

He looked up incredulously, finally mumbling in a flat tone. "She's incredible..."


Mamoru! What did I just say? Stop talking and start reading.

He shook his head and read on.


You were always my first love, Mamoru. I loved you with all of my heart, and I think-no, I know that I always will. I hope you will be as happy with Jessica as I was with you..

.
I know that I will never love again, but I don't mind. The year I spent with you was enough to last a lifetime for me. I shouldn't love you anymore-hell, I should hate you. You hurt me so deeply, Mamoru.. The words you said will
forever be buried in me, sharp slivers of glass that will still hurt thousands of years from now, when I am Neo-Queen Serenity. Poetic, isn't it? I always wanted to be.

But anyway…As I was saying, my heart aches not for me, but for Chibi Usa. Okay, so it aches for me, too. A lot. But still. Because
of you, she will no longer have the chance to live. She'll simply cease to exist and I'll spend my long lifetime longing for you and my only daughter. Think about it, Mamoru. Just because you don't love me any longer, you have taken an innocent's life.
But I don't blame you. I could never blame you, Mamoru, because much as it hurts, I still love you.

Now, start reading aloud again.

He obeyed.

"Scouts, Chibi Usa, and...Mamoru, I'm gone. I won't ever return unless desperately needed. Maybe you'll be sorry, and maybe you'll wish you could take it back, but I am gone. Move on, I have no use for any of you anymore. Sound familiar, Mamoru?

 
Remember, my friends, my daughter, and my love--ex-love. This is how you wanted it-exactly how you wanted it. It's your fault. I'm not being judgmental-I love you all dearly and wish you no pain. But so be it.

Goodbye.


Love, forever (and yet never again.)
Usagi. PKA Serenity.

The letter dropped from Mamoru's head and floated to the floor. Ami bent over and picked it up, skimming her eyes over it, though she couldn't see through the sheen of tears. "Same old Usagi," She managed to choke out fondly. "She's forgotten all her kanji symbols…"

But everyone was focused on Mamoru, who was shouting, his face white. "What the hell does she mean, previously known as Serenity?! What is she doing!?"

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