AN: Well, this is a rather short chapter but it's been a rather bad week for me. In any case the first cover sketch is at http://photos.yahoo.com/sweetheart8875, it's in the folder labeled My Sketches. Like I said before, White came out looking really weird so be warned. Right now I'm working on one with Max and Logan - but I'm too disheartened by the cancellation to finish it so don't expect it anytime soon.

Chap 7

Resting

"He's been in the building all day." Logan sat in front of his computer, watching the tracer they'd attached to the cell phone Max had handed White. "It doesn't look like he's figured us out yet." Behind him, Max stood keeping watch at the windows while Alec stood near the door. This was Alec's brilliant plan. The problem with it was that the tracer they'd used worked both ways, and if White had stopped to look, he would've been able to trace Logan rather then letting things work the other way around.

"He'd better not." Max spoke protectively, and glared in Alec's direction as she did so. Not happy that the cost of his lightened mood was Logan's safety.

"Ouch." Alec put his hands over his heart and raised his eyebrows. "Remind me to never listen to you again. Or weren't you the one who said to just tell you if I ever had a problem?" Max glared at him once again, but before she could retort, Logan cut in.

"Hey, I think he's moving." The little blip on Logan's screen was indeed in motion. Abandoning his post Alec came over to where they stood and watched the screen with some excitement. At that moment, the lights flickered, and the city plunged into darkness.

"Aw shit."

***

The brownout had plunged the entire apartment into darkness and in every room save for the study there was at least one candle lit. Anastasia came into the dark study bring a candle with her, she had thought that Ames was in this room but the darkness seemed to indicate that she had been wrong. She knew that something was bothering him, the way he'd been acting all evening made that much obvious, but unfortunately she could not think of a tactful way of asking him. As she reached for a matchbook she suddenly found her arms restrained tightly against her body. "Don't." Ana silently cursed at herself for being careless enough not to notice that she wasn't alone as she did her best to keep herself from tensing up and springing out of White's grasp. He didn't move, only held on to her tightly, and after a few seconds Anastasia identified the smell of liquor on his breath.

"What's wrong?" She dropped her head against his shoulder and looked up at him with wide questioning eyes, willing him to answer her.

"Everything." He stepped away then and Ana was finally able to turn around and see his haggard disheveled appearance. Slowly he dropped himself onto the floor leaning his back against the desk. Silently he handed Anastasia the glass he'd been drinking out of as she sat down beside him. She saw the glass was almost empty, so she drained it before setting it down. She could tell he wasn't drunk, especially since familiars didn't get drunk period. Liquor served to make them drowsy, but it didn't intoxicate them like it did normal people. "Tell me where you've been Ana, where you went after you deflected."

His sudden changing of the topic surprised her and while instinct told her to lie, intuition told Ana to open up. "Manticore mostly, I was the one who had to charm all those damned politicians into letting us stay open, and the one who had to make sure the Government never found out our real purpose." Ana stopped talking for a moment, suddenly unsure of how much to say or not say. "I was the one none of the others quite understood or knew about… the other deflectors mostly hid in the shadows, but I was the one thrust into the light."

"Then why did I never find you?" Ames looked at her intently, and though she never looked up, she could feel his gaze.

"Maybe because you never looked." She was confused, as uncertain of what he was asking as she was of what she was saying but somehow her answer had made sense to him.

"I tried to… I wanted to… but after you deflected…" He stopped and she could feel him restraining himself. Even in the dark she could see his knuckles turning white as he tightened his fists. "There's too much you don't know… too much you never stayed around to find out. I used to think about the things you said and I'd replay the left over and over again… wondering if I'd made the right choice. Until I made my first kill… it sounds terrible, but the power… you feel like God. So I began listening to the Conclave more and more… and after awhile, I began believing." Ames stopped speaking and Ana leaned her head against his arm.

"I'm sorry." The brief words should've been insignificant but they seemed to fill up the room, and they were enough. After a few moments, Ana's breathing evened and White realized that she'd fallen asleep, likely because of the rum she'd drank. Sadly he looked down at one of the two women standing between him and his son. Only this one he couldn't hate as he wished he did.

After a few minutes more of quiet contemplation, it occurred to Ames that he should probably carry Anastasia to her room but the alcohol had begun to get to him as well, seeping his strength. Felling drained, he did little more then move away from the desk and drag her close. Holding her as tightly as if she were a lifeline as he too feel into the oblivion of sleep.

"Damn it Ana why won't you listen to me!" The high stone walls around them warped Ames angry shouting, twisting them and magnifying their desperation.

"Because you're wrong!" Ana stood only a few feet away from him, and the tears in her eyes glistened visibly. "The old ways can't be right Ames, infanticide can't be the only way. Watching those children die can't possibly be the only way." She felt as if she were about to break down into tears, but pride kept her from doing so. "I refuse to believe that it's the only way."

"Don't be crazy Ana… thinking like that is sacrilege, and you know that." He reached out for Ana's arms, hoping to calm her into thinking straight, but for some reason she would not listen and he was glad that no one could hear them in the abandoned attic.

"No, I don't know that. I don't know anything Ames. I can't be sure of anything. But I do know that Sandeman's words… his ideas. They make sense to me." She glared at him, defiance clearly written in her eyes, and at last he backed away.

"Fine." He was angry, and she could see it. "Do whatever you want - but I'm telling you Ana, he's been labeled a heretic. They're watching him, and if you keep on like this, they'll start watching you to." He walked away from her then, and as his form faded Ana felt suddenly cold. As if she had just been betrayed by the one person she had expected to entrust with her life.

The sun streaming through the windows awoke Ana, banishing whatever she had been dreaming away from her mind. She was disoriented and cold, so she gently snuggled deeper into the arms around her. After a few puzzled moments she suddenly remembered where she was and how she'd ended up there. She expected herself to want to pull away, but oddly she felt safe… as if it weren't an enemies arms around her. Quietly she watched the sun rise higher into the sky, waiting for Ames to wake up, wishing she could remember just who he was… just who she was. Beside her she felt him stirring and turned her head to greet him. "Morning."

His expression showed that he was as disoriented as she had been, but it wasn't so much surprise in his eyes as uncertainty. He didn't return her greeting, but only looked at her intently, as if unsure of something. He seemed to be quietly questioning her. We've broken all the rules Ana. He didn't say the words, but in her mind, she heard them whispered across memory. She couldn't remember where and when he'd said that, but what she did remember was her reply I don't care anymore. Not so long as you're here. He remembered then to, and she could tell that he was thinking the same thoughts. Only his memory was clear, unlike her he knew. And the knowledge stabbed at him. Could he choose between his son and his angel? Could he possibly betray her once again?

BTW - Whoever made the comment about the food fights - I've can't answer your question about the 'American' thing, but I for one had hoped that little scene would lighten the mood of the last chapter slightly, especially considering what Ana had been dreaming about.