AN: Well, I won't pretend to not be discouraged by the lack of reviews, but since I've punished all of you non reviewers out there by making everyone wait a month for the ending I feel better. (Sadistic non? =P) Now I just hope you people still want to read it.

C

hapter 11

Ablution

I still recall the words you said to me,

It's what you did not say that sets me free.

Now how can I find peace of mind when you keep coming back again?

It's not ok for you to play this game of se saw with my heart

Now it hurts too much

And it hits too hard

And I won't play this part.

"Sector four. Three PM. Bring Anastasia. You want your son alive, keep your damned familiars out of this." The line clicked dead as suddenly as it had come alive. Surrounded by federal agents and other humans White utilized his best acting skills in order to keep calm, muttering something about 'damned prank callers' that caused those around him to laugh before returning calmly to what he had been previously doing. Five agitated minutes crawled by, slowly came another five in which his heart beat with more intensity then he would've liked to admit. At last he excused himself and retreated to the quietness of his office, hoping that enough time had passed so that no one would tie 494's 'prank' call to his withdrawal.

Pulling out his cell phone Ames automatically typed in Lita's number yet he hesitated to hit the send button. By now, getting the conclave involved was inevitable, 452 had made it that way when she'd entered Ray into the equation. Whatever else he felt about her, Ames knew that 452 had a sense of honor and that if he complied with her terms he would get Ray back, and he certainly felt no qualms about Ana's safety amongst her own. Unfortunately, if Ray were returned to him suddenly he would owe the conclave an explanation, and an explanation that would involve Ana was an explanation he could not afford to give. In the most fanciful parts of his mind he imagined that Ana would choose to stay by his side and that they would escape the Conclave and everything that stood between them. In his boyish daydream it all seemed a great adventure, a noble sacrifice made at the alter of love, however he was well aware that the conclave would end his life before he ever had the opportunity to make such an escape. More importantly he knew that Ana would never abandon her people as he would the cult.

If he dialed Lita he would have to tell the council everything and have them lie in wait of 452 so that they could kill her and her compatriots. If it were anyone but Ray being offered to him this is the choice he would made, but he was well aware that this would mean risking both Ray and Ana in the crossfire. It would also mean having to explain to the conclave that he had kept Ana from them for three days.

At last his mind would itself around a desperate plan, a plan that would open himself to accusations of treason, one that might ensure Rays safety and give Ana a chance to escape - or kill them both. With determination that boarded upon desperation he hit the send button ignoring the maybes his mind sent toward him. The 'maybe' that 452 didn't have Ray, the 'maybe' that Ana's capture had been planned, and that 'maybe' this wasn't an exchange of hostages, but a dangerous game in which mice trapped cats, and he was the cat.

***

Alec hung up the pay phone he had been using and nodded once to Max parked across the street. Immediately, the sedan she had 'borrowed' came alive and she sped out of his vision. Putting on his helmet he too raced out of the sector as fast as possible - in the opposite direction. Once past the cheek point he immediately stopped, soon after an inconspicuous black SUV pulled up beside him. The window went down to reveal Logan Kale.

"Ready?" Logan's voice held an edge to it, a steel edge that reflected the one in Alec's eyes, hidden behind his helmet.

"Ready." As soon as the words were spoken the two parted company. Each of the three allies headed in a different direction, all supposedly serving one plan, each with a purpose slightly different then the other. But sadly, of the three, only one had any vague idea of what was really about to happen and unfortunately even that one had been badly misinformed.

***

Max glanced about the quiet and abandoned warehouse. With something akin to a shudder she thought that the place felt like a mausoleum. This was the same place that Mia had led her too a few weeks past, since then Max had discovered that a good number of people avoided it like the plague; apparently urban legend had the place down as a Mafia execution chamber. Glancing about, she found that it was no lighter in daytime than it was in the evening. As she looked up at the rafters she tried to find a place where she could hide without being seen by anyone with the vision of an X series or better, after a full ten minutes she finally discovered a place where she could see below without being seen. Almost silently, she settled herself into her hiding place.

After making sure she was secure and easily able to reach the cell phone Alec had given her she glanced at her watch; 11:30, that left at least four hours until game time yet somehow her heart began to beat faster. This was about more than just getting Anastasia away from White, it was about finding Sandeman and possibly salvaging her relationship with Logan.

Yet what unsettled her was that she still didn't know just who Ana was, why Renfro was keeping tabs on her, why Jon was so devoted to her, and why everyone was so damned intent on saving her from Ames White when she didn't seem to need saving. Carefully Max mentally went over everything they'd found in Joshua's house, trying to figure out just what it all insinuated but unfortunately the explanations that she and Logan had concocted thus far were the only ones that came to mind. Absently she wondered just where Sandeman was and how he fit into all of this, how two familiars could possibly fit into the seemingly hopeless plight of protecting the transgenics. Restlessly, Max removed her mind from the troubling thoughts and began to think about something even more unpleasant; what Alec and Logan considered to pass for 'a plan'. She didn't like this 'plan' one bit and had said as much to the two. Pity they didn't listen. Sighing, she settled down into her hiding place and glanced about for familiars.

***

Ames parked his car outside of his apartment with some hesitation. Sitting inside for a second he wondered just how Ana was going to react when he walked in. Guilt mingled with apprehension and silently he cursed at himself and wondered why he was acting like such a fool. It's not as if you're about to murder her. His brain spoke with a cold logic and at last he got out of the car.

When he walked into the apartment Ana didn't look up which was in itself disconcerting, that she was completely focused on a bowl of something that that looked like potato soup was simply disturbing. When he sat down directly across from her at the dining room table she didn't bat an eye. Long moments passed in silence until at last she said only. "You're early."

Ames was uncomfortable with her cold demeanor, though he didn't pretend to be confused as to its source. "Yeah well something came up." For the first time that day she looked at him and he was surprised to find none of the familiar warmth or mockery in her eyes, but only a chill aloofness which he couldn't place. "I received a phone call from X5- 494. He and another transgenic kidnapped my son a month ago. Today he offered to trade Ray for you. Provided of course that you are alive and well" Ames was surprised at his bluntness, but it seemed that Ana wasn't.

"Oh." With this nominal response she returned to her staring and her soup. After a few moments in which Ames thought his head might burst from the silence, Ana finally spoke. "Do you love him?" It took Ames a moment to figure out that she wasn't continuing the previous conversation but referring to his son, when he did he thought that it was ludicrous she should ask such a thing.

"Of course. I think the only person who may have cared as much about him as I did was his mother." Ana kept her eyes trained on him as she sipped her soup, and again waited before replying.

"You're speaking in past tense. Did you kill her?" She phrased it like a question, yet spoke it like a fact. And in the presence of the cold contempt in her voice Ames wasn't sure whether or not she wanted an answer.

"I… I cared about her. Loved her, even. But in the end Ray's future mattered more… I couldn't afford to jeopardize that because I'd gotten overly fond of some human. And after she was dead…. It didn't matter so much any more."

As he spoke, Ana had risen and walked into the kitchen. Not sure what she was up to, Ames only sat still. A few moments later she returned with another bowl of soup. Placing it in front of him she made sure he was looking into her eyes as she spoke. "And yet you'd question why I deflected." Her words were acidic, her tone acrid. Ames had no idea how to reply and so he didn't. The rest of their meal was eaten in silence.

***

At precisely one thirty PM Alec's cell phone rang twice then silenced itself. That he knew, was Max's signal. The warehouse therefore was all clear, so far no familiars or government agents had shown up. At 1:35 PM the phone rang four times and then silenced. This was Logan stating that Ames had not left his apartment yet.

Glancing at his watch, Alec was glad that they had left themselves so much time, for safety reasons Max had decided that Alec should bike from sector nine into sector three while making a delivery from Jam Pony as a cover. His plea that he would be too tired to fight if he biked that far fell on deaf ears. In retribution, Alec ignored Max's request that he not pack any heat in case they searched him at a checkpoint and created trouble.

An hour later his cell phone rang once. Alec recognized it as Logan's signal that White had begun moving.

***

As they drove through the streets of Seattle both Ames and Ana were strangely quiet. There was an odd type of tension between them, inexplicable because there was a different reason for it from each side. As they sat in pre checkpoint traffic Ana studied her companion closely, perceiving that he seemed unable to meet her gaze. There was something he needed to know, and about a million things she needed to say, but for the life of her Ana couldn't figure out when or how to tell him any of it. At last, just when the silence had reached a breaking point White's cell phone rang.

"I hope you're in Sector Three because if you're not at the corner of Oak and 11 in fifteen minutes I'm gone." The line went dead before Ames could reply, and Ana noted with some disappointment that the voice was not Jon's but a woman who she didn't recognize.

Turning on the ignition, Ames glanced at Ana to see her reaction to the call. Was she happy to hear from the transgenics? Glad that they'd be parting company for good? Ana's face showed no emotion what so ever, and her eyes stared blankly out the window. Chillingly, Ames thought that she resembled nothing so much as a woman waiting to be executed.

Once they reached Oak and 11 Ames parked and waited for the phone to ring again. Within seconds there was a male voice on the phone relaying further directions, "Get out of the car. Open the third door down the street." In some confusion Ana identified the voice as Eyes Only's.

"We'd better go." Startled, Ana realized that Ames had already unbuckled his seatbelt and opened his door.

"Oh." Anastasia moved slowly, her step lengthened by lethargy that stemmed from a weariness of soul. She followed Ames mindlessly, unable to identify the emotions that screamed into her muffled and frozen mind. It wasn't until the door behind her closed and she was plunged into semi darkness that she realized she had walked into a building. Her lips twisted into a semi ironic smile when she realized she had been led to a warehouse that some idiot had built into the shape of a residential building. As she cast her eye lightly over Ames she realized that the expression on his face was both apprehensive and guilty. Looking at him, she decided that now was the time to tell him what she had barely restrained herself from saying all day. Opening her mouth however, Anastasia was surprised to find that she had no voice.

"I used to think that trust was synonymous with life. That once begun, it's something that won't stop… or disappear… or end until you died. Naive wasn't I?" Anastasia looked towards a window as she spoke, her aurora was that of one telling a story. A muse reciting a tragic epic. Ever so slightly, ever so gradually, she turned her face to Ames. "I once trusted you like that, but you betrayed me and it felt like the world had betrayed me." She stopped, looking at him to see if her words conjured any emotion at all. And briefly, she thought she saw something flicker in his eyes. But the moment the mask of passive indifference returned to his face, her voice became brutally harsh.

"I suppose I ought to thank you, if it hadn't been for what you did I wouldn't have separated myself from the cult so completely. Wouldn't have stayed a part of the resistance for so long." She laughed, almost cruelly. "In fact, I ought to thank you for making me 'grow up'." Her eyes burned with a sadistic flame, her voice dripped with mockery. Briefly, Ames was reminded of the triumphant girl who had laughed at him twenty years before for being a coward. Yet as quickly as it come, her madness left, and a reflective calm seemed to settle over her.

"Do you know? The only reason I didn't get on that helicopter that night, was because I thought I could save you?" She looked sad now, and Ames began wondering if wanted to hear what she had to saw after all; if he could stand her hatred on top of the guilt he already felt. "Sandeman said that men like you didn't change - gods I wish I'd believed him." Grasping at straws, Ames desperately tried to change the subject.

"Is Sandeman still alive?"

In the rafters, both Alec and Max had been privy to their entire conversation and while a good deal of it made absolutely no sense to them, it did shed some light upon the relationship of the two below. Anxiously, Max looked at Anastasia, willing her to answer the question White had just asked, desperately praying for the answer she needed.

"Yes. Or at least - he was." Ana raised a corner of her mouth. "You see, the others saw the priestess and her lackeys shoot at me. They saw me fall off of that building. So they came back for my corpse before the cult could get their hands on it." She paused dramatically. "Imagine their surprise when they found me still alive." She laughed. "Alive. What a joke. See, after they 'found' me Sandeman placed me in Cryogenic Stasis…. for more then fifteen years. Imagine it Ames, looking at the stars one moment, and then suddenly waking to find that the world had changed… that for fifteen years you had been dead to the world."

In the rafters above and on the floor below there was a stunned silence. At last Max and Alec knew why Anastasia hadn't aged in those photographs, on the ground, Ames was doing some preliminary mathematics that didn't quite add up to what he had just been told.

"Why fifteen years? Even every bone in your body had been broken - even if he had needed to culture and transplant every nerve cell in your spinal column - if he had to clone and grow you a new heart. There's no possible way that it would've taken any more then five years at most. Not on Sandeman's level." Ames was perplexed and Ana was very suddenly very, very, cold.

"Would you like to know why?" She looked him the eye, and all Ames saw, was ice.

"Can't you guess?" She waited.

Silence.

"I was pregnant."

Silence again.

"It took Sandeman fifteen years to keep our daughter from dying." She looked at him again, to see if he comprehended when he seemed unable to reply she simply went on with her story. "When the pulse happened, I came out of stasis. I think I was only awake for an hour or two, but in that time… in that time Sandeman realized that I had lost my sanity thanks to your betrayal. So when I woke up, he suppressed my memory, thinking that if I never came into contact with you, that if I never remembered. I'd be ok."

Ames didn't speak. He couldn't.

"And now that I remember, I only want to know why." Her gaze was searching, seeking an answer. "Why betray me when all I did was love you? All I wanted was to be able to trust you."

Above, Max was as shocked as Ames himself at the revelation that had just been made. So much so in fact that she almost missed the cars pulling up outside as it was she was a second too late and Alec, who had already spotted them, swooped onto the floor with gun in hand.

"You son of a bitch."

"Ames don't!"

Ames had heard Alec the moment he hit the ground, and drawn his gun immediately. In the split second that followed, Ana and Alec had spoken at the same instant two bullets were released from two weapons. As if in slow motion, Ames saw Anastasia step in front of him to take the gun from his hand as she shot it. As she recoiled with the shock of his bullet, he dimly felt Alec's shot graze his arm.

Ana had caught the bullet straight in her chest, had he intended to, he couldn't have hit her with a more deadly shot. As she fell, he put an arm around her shoulders, lowering her to floor gently as he kneeled her beside her, willing her to be alive. She looked at him slightly, seeing him through fluttering lids. And with one final breath her life blood drained away.

It's funny how we end up here.

I never thought I'd see this all disappear.

"Ana!" He broke the silence that had surrounded that moment, as if by call her she would awaken.

From where he stood, Alec realized with an almost clinical interest that she was dead.

In the shadows, Max too saw this, she also saw that the outside of the building was beginning to swarm with familiars and other gunmen. Quickly, she jumped to the ground and grabbed Alec's arm, jerking him back to the present. "We need to leave - NOW!" Letting his gun clatter to the floor, Alec broke from Max's grasp and made a lunge for White. See what he was doing, Max grabbed his leg and caused them both to stumble onto the floor.

The fall seemed to knock some sense into him, and Alec saw their predicament. With on last glance at Ana's corpse he ran for the back of the where house and the sewer entrance located there. Once underground he made a sharp left turn followed by a right. Behind him he could hear Max running in a different direction, calling his name as she went. Stopping at last he peered into the darkness waiting for the man he knew ought to be here. Wondering what would happen now.

When he had received the page this morning, the number had now led to Ana but to a man who said he was in contact with her. He had promised that in return for Ana escaping White, he would receive the cure for Max's virus.

"I assume it's done?" Alec started when he realized that the voice had come from behind him, turning he found himself unable to see the man who spoke.

"Yeah, it's done." He breathed heavily, anger flaring in his eyes. "The soneofabith killed her!"

The man with whom he spoke remained impassive. "You did what you could. The rest is hardly your fault." There was a sound of glass clicking as the man paused. "Here is my end of the bargain. Don't forget our deal" He slid a glass case carefully toward Alec who immediately bent to retrieve it. Opening the case, he found a single plastic syringe filled with a red liquid.

"So this is the cure?" When he no answer, Alec looked up to find that the man was gone. In the corner of his eye he saw the top of a silver cane disappear around a corner. To him, it strangely resembled a monkey.

***

"Alec!" Max hissed his name through her teeth for the umpteenth time as she searched around the sewer system.

"I'm right here." Max felt a strange prickling sensation at her neck as Alec came up behind her. Raising her hand to the spot she found nothing there. Reeling around, she saw nothing in Alec's hand. Glancing at him, she saw the pained expression in his eyes.

"I'm sorry about your friend." Alec acknowledged her sympathy, but changed the subject immediately.

"I'm sorry Joshua won't be able to find his father now." Max smiled a wan smile, mentally adding a cure to the virus to the things that were no longer possible.

"It's alright." Alec stared at her for a moment.

"Have you ever considered that the virus was all a matter of time?" Max looked up surprised, wondering if Alec had read her mind. Deciding she didn't want to talk about it, she shrugged. The two of them continued in silence until they came up at where they'd agreed to meet Logan, two blocks from the Warehouse.

The car ride to Joshua's place was a somber one, no one wanting to say anything after what had happened. As they got out of the SUV, Alec 'accidentally' jostled Max, causing her to loose her balance. Without thinking Logan reached out and caught her.

"Oh my God." Disentangling herself from him, Max waited for Logan to fall to the ground in pain, when he didn't she blinked. "You… you're ok." Not willing to believe it, Max gave Logan another full minute, before hesitantly taking a step toward him. Several moments later, she was in his arms. Her heart in her eyes, and all the love in heart pouring out in the tears of joy she cried. Almost unbelieving himself, Logan held her as tightly ash he could.

Behind them, Alec smiled.

"Like I said. It was only a matter of time." And if he knew better, Alec certainly wasn't going to say anything about it.

***

It might've been the first snow of winter, the floating white flakes falling as gently as an angel's tears. Up high in one of Seattle's cold stone buildings a woman watched them float to the ground with a frigid raging anguish. She appeared to be tranquil and serene as she stood in the window of an empty apartment. "You were right you know." She spoke to an elderly man behind her, one who leaned heavily on what was once a purely decorative cane. "I never should have stayed." They had been speaking for the good part of an hour, and by now her control was beginning to wear thin. Grimly she watched three men carry a cold corpse out of a building nearly a block away. One of them with a cold expression of grief written in his eyes.

"For what it's worth, I'm sorry." Sandeman lay his hand on the woman's shoulder as he spoke; the weight of his arm a strong reassuring pressure. He couldn't see her eyes behind the dark sunglasses she wore, but he could sense her regret. The woman stared intently at the men carrying the dead woman and Sandeman was left staring at her black and copper colored hair. Her eyes focused in on one of the men in particular and even a half a block away she could see the tightening of his muscles as he gently carried the body from the stretcher into the car that had come for it. He made sure that her long black hair didn't touch the dirty street, that her pale white skin was protected from the cold she could no longer feel.

Somewhere else in the apartment the laughter of two children could be heard, their voices bringing a fresh wave of tears toward eyes that refused to cry. The woman stood tall in her black pantsuit and lilac colored turtleneck, her newly cut and highlighted hair falling to just above her shoulders. She was no longer the Anastasia Sandeman had once known so well, the gentle but driven girl he'd watch grow up into a determined and loyal woman. "I wanted so badly to be able to trust him. How could I know it would end like this?" Her voice almost broke, and Sandeman didn't answer her question, knowing that he'd only remind her of what had happened last time she had kept faith in Ames White. Yet even so he understood that her heart still cried for him, as Ames did for her. How Ironic that they who loved each other so much hurt each other so badly.

"Don't blame yourself Anastasia. Anya had leukemia; her death was imminent. At least this way she knew she was dying for a cause, she understood that when the two of you switched places this morning." This time Anastasia did cry, if only a single tear to grieve the passing of her clone.

"God… how many more have to die like this? Because of my mistakes?" Sandeman moved closer to her, holding her as a father might his grieving daughter. "First Jon, now Anya. How many more?" His touch seemed to shatter the ice around her and she cried in earnest now, soft choked up sobs.

"Wars have casualties Anastasia, we all loose comrades." She still cried but less now, her tears back under control. "I'm just glad you're not one of them." Anastasia looked up at him, a little confused. "You've got a little girl and boy to raise, that's why I came to Seattle yesterday. As soon as I got Dave's call in fact." Anastasia's grateful smile was half hearted as she dried her eyes with her hands, removing and replacing her sunglasses swiftly. Seeing this Sandeman immediately changed his tone from fatherly to business like. "I've arranged for you and the kids to fly to Vancouver, Dave's already there. He's already bought an apartment for you, Crissy will sell this one." Anastasia nodded, not quite listening.

"Mommy, mommy!" A five-year-old bundle of energy ran into the room and flung herself into Anastasia's arms with a warm smile and a kiss. Ana held her daughter tightly, loving her dearly though she was a constant reminder of the mistakes she'd made. With familiar blood from both sides, Kiera was abnormally intelligent for a child her age, but physically she was also incredibly frail. "Mommy, look what I found!" Little Kiera raised her hand high and let a silver locket dangle from a slim chain. "Can I keep it?" Peering closely at the locket Anastasia saw the letters 'AA' engraved on it. She stiffened slightly, and her pallor immediately altered. On the ground by her feet a little boy with piercing blue eyes noticed the change.

"What's wrong mother?" Anastasia looked down and saw her recently adopted son gazing at her with his father's eyes. She knew it was difficult for him to call her 'mother' but slowly she could tell that he was beginning to not only trust her, but love her as well. He was cautiously beginning to let go of the life he had previously led and Anastasia could tell that her four-day disappearance had worried him.

"Nothing dear." She smiled despite the sorrow that the locket had brought on and set Kiera back onto the ground. "Your father gave this to me you know." For a moment the two kids wondered which of them she had spoken to, it never occurred to Kiera or Ray that she spoke to both of them. Unclasping the locket Anastasia put it around Kiera's neck, happy to see the expression of true joy the action seemed to bring. "Now why don't the two of you go play for awhile? Grandpa Sandeman and I have a few more things to discuss." Each child gave her a peck on the cheek and returned to their game of randomly chasing each other around. As she watched them go Anastasia appeared to be far more troubled then before.

"What do I tell them when… What do I say to my children when they ask about their father?" She murmured the question to herself, not expecting an answer. "Do I tell them that he's a killer? That I was foolish enough to love him?" Anastasia's brow drew together in worry, and her hands tightened till her nails bore red crescents into the palm of her hand.

"Ray is old enough to come to his own conclusions, and Kiera will probably think that Jon was her father. You may not have ever been involved with him, but a four year old won't think that. He was your bodyguard for many years Anastasia, and he'd probably been around for as long as she can remember. He probably bought her ice cream and took her to the park, she'll grow up thinking that Jon did all those things a father's supposed to." Anastasia nodded, grief again tightening her chest.

"But if she ever asks? If they ask?"

"If they ask though, once they're old enough, tell them the truth."

The truth. How simple it seemed, but Anastasia knew it wouldn't be. Suddenly she moved her hand over her stomach, a wave of nausea overtaking her. Oh dear God…. Please no…For the first time it occurred to her that she might be pregnant again, that perhaps the fates had played another cruel trick by giving her another of Ames White's children. Dear God, how would I explain this one? Sandeman saw her sway on her feet, and while he didn't identify the cause he could tell that she wouldn't be able to stand much more of the mental anguish she was currently subject to. Quietly he suggested they leave for the airport.

Anastasia heard him, but didn't answer. Her mind was with Ames White where he stood in the snow. For the first time she aknowledged that she would have to leave Seattle behind, leave him behind, and somehow saying goodbye a second time was that much harder for her. Once, she had thought her heart was broken by betrayal. Now, she knew that it wasn't his treason that had hurt but his love. So perhaps, if she left love behind… if she left everything behind, perhaps then she'd be able to feel again, to live again. Gently, ever so gently, she placed a kiss from her hand onto the cold glass of the window, with it she transported all of the emotions she had ever felt for Ames White. "Fenas'tol." And like the snowflakes, perhaps they would fall onto the cold granite ground to be buried, frozen, and someday forgotten.

I'll always know down in my soul we really had so far to go

I've given all I have to give and now it's time for me to live

And I won't look back

And I won't regret

Though it hurts like hell

Someday I will forget

~Fini~

Close notes: I'm sorry that the section about Max receiving the cure was so short, but I'd originally intended this piece as a starting place for another more Max/Logan centered piece. As it is, I believe I will be leaving this as is. I hope every enjoyed this and thanks to those that reviewed for all the positive encouragement. :)