Part 6
"Kainan! Kainan!" The people were cheering for Kainan, the BEST team in the prefecture.
I watched the people cheer for the best team in Kanagawa as I went to the locker room. It has always been my duty to check Mitsui out if he was okay before he went to a game.
I went inside the locker room. Mitsui was all alone inside.
"Hey, Mitchan," I said and went in front of him. He was still wearing his uniform. The white top and the pants. He was also wearing his Shohoku jacket over his white top, but he took it off.
"Hey yo, Niki," he greeted with a warm smile. "Are you ready for the first game of the finals?"
"Of course I am! I'm so ecstatic that you were able to join!" I excitedly told him.
"Really?" he asked. He grinned. "I am very nervous but, I know that this, too, shall pass."
"Did I disturb you? You haven't dressed up yet in your jersey," I observed.
"Oh, it's okay. There is still 60 minutes to get ready. The others just had to have a small prep talk." He told me.
"Okay, well, I better go now. You've gotta be ready. Good luck!" I said and started to leave.
"Hey Niki," Mitsui called me.
I looked at him. "Yes?"
"Niki. I. I'm really sorry." He said.
"About what?" I asked, looking puzzled.
"I have to tell you this before it gets too late."
"What is it?" I smiled at him.
"I'm sorry. but I broke again my promise to you."
"What is it?" I asked.
"I-I-I. I don't really know how to say it to you. you might get. mad. And I'll lose my bestest friend in the whole wide universe." He told me while looking at me then to the floor.
"Just say it." I told him. I went near to him and looked at him straight in the eye.
"Will you hate me if." he paused. ".I tell you that I'm in love with you.?"
My eyes widened at his words. I unconsciously shook my head while slowly sitting down in shock.
"I'm sorry," he said. "I know you'll be getting mad at what I was going to tell you-"
"But you promised me and I told you that if you fell in love with me I was going to kill you!"
"Then, hell, kill me!" Mitsui exclaimed to me as he opened his top. (By the way my jaw dropped at the sight of his broad chest. ooh la la~~ but I didn't show him I was darn stunned, of course.)
I tried to leave. "Please, Mitsui. leave me alone for a second-"
I wasn't able to continue what I'm saying.
He kissed me.
Omigod. is this really happening? I'm kissing Mitsui.
I was swept away by my emotions. He was touching my face as he kissed me. I held on to his face. I was really in love with Mitsui now, especially since now I know he's a great kisser.
Suddenly, to my horror, I saw Rukawa standing at the door.
Mitsui and I looked at Rukawa.
"Rukawa! I-I."
But Rukawa ran away.
I tried to run after Rukawa.
"Niki! Where are you going?!" Mitsui called after me. But I ran as fast as I could. I lost Mitsui.
Anyway, I caught up with Rukawa. He was at the garden beside the stadium. He was facing the back.
"Rukawa, I-"
"You don't have to explain. You love Mitsui more than me. So what Yohei and Sakuragi said was wrong. Mitsui and you are more than friends. I have lost!"
"Rukawa-"
"What does Mitsui have that I don't have? The looks? Wit? Sense of humor? Skill? Tell me!"
"Kaede, you're wrong! Mitsui and I are close friends-"
"Do close friends French kiss?!"
"Kaede, we were not French kissing-"
"Oh yes you were and I saw it with my own two eyes!"
"I told you that wasn't a French K-"
"But still the thing is, YOU KISSED HIM!"
"Okay! I have to admit, I was swept away by my emotions because-"
"Because he's a good kisser, is that it? Is that it?!" Kaede went to me. Tears of anger and frustration fell down from his face. "Niki. goddamit, I love you so much!"
"Kaede. I like you too but-"
"You only LIKE me? Is that it? Plain liking only?!"
I couldn't speak. I felt like crying. Rukawa is so angry.
"When you were hugging Mitsui in the Shoyo game, I was there wishing I should've been your best friend instead. I was wishing that I was Mitsui and he was me. That way he would feel the pain I feel." Rukawa looked at me straight in the eye. His lips were trembling. "It's painful, what you're doing to me. You're giving me a chance to court you but it seems you're showing me you don't want me to continue doing so. What can I do to make you love me more than Mitsui?!? Do you need a mode of comparison to be able to choose between him and me? Is that it?" he demanded me. He held my shoulders tightly and shook me.
"Rukawa! Stop it, you're hurting me!" I cried. I started to sob, too.
"Whom do you love?!?" he shouted. "Who?!"
"Kaede-"
"I'm sorry for being harsh. I just. love you so much."
"Kaede." I said.
Then Kaede kissed me. (Two guys in a day! Whew~~)
And like what happened a few minutes ago, Mitsui saw what was happening.
He rushed to the scene and pulled Rukawa. "You're harassing her!" Mitsui shouted as he punched Kaede in the face.
They began to fight in the garden.
"STOP IT!!" I shouted. I went to them both and slapped them both.
"You are both so childish! I hate you both!!!" I shouted to them. I ran away, crying.
Why are you both like that?!?
As I ran, I was crying. I think I don't wanna watch the game anymore. I lost my zest for it. I think I just don't wanna see Mitsui and Rukawa for the meantime.
I passed by Youhei. "What's wrong, Niki?" he asked.
I did not answer him. I'm sorry for ignoring you, Yohei.
I ran home.
Assholes.
+++
Ding, dong.
I heard the doorbell ring. I looked out the window. It was Yohei.
I opened the door. "Hey, Mito," I greeted while trying to wipe away the stray tears from my eyes.
"I thought you were going to watch the game," he asked.
"I just don't feel like watching." I answered with a blank expression on my face.
"C'mon, we all know you wanna watch that game. We tried to call you up on your mobile phone but it was closed."
"Oh yeah, I turned it off." I said expressionlessly.
"Shohoku lost," Yohei broke the news to me sadly. I looked at him immediately after he said the bad news. I was shocked. They lost?!?
"You know why?" Yohei asked me.
"W-w-why?" I stammered.
"Because you weren't there. You are Shohoku's biggest cheerer. Mitsui couldn't surpass Jin. because you weren't there to support him." Yohei told me.
"Who cares.? He's a jerk. Him and Rukawa,"
"Really?" Yohei asked me. "There's an uncertainty in your eyes."
"I'm sure." I tried to say but my tears started to flow again.
"Rukawa collapsed in the game. He had very little stamina that time."
"Omigod! Rukawa fainted?!?" I cried. Yohei nodded his head slowly. "Yes. And I think he fainted because you weren't there to support him."
I leaned my head against Yohei's shoulder. I started to cry again. He put an arm around my shoulder.
"Yohei." I said. "I love one of them. But it causes a big conflict. Whom should I choose?"
"Follow your heart. Who do you think is closer to you? Whom do you think does your heart want? Your crush, or your best friend?" Yohei asked me.
"M-my. best friend."
"I told you. You'll fall in love with Mitsui."
"I love Mitsui so much. Rukawa was just like a mask to cover what my true feelings were. because Mitsui and I made a vow that we would not love each other. But we were wrong. He professed his love to me a while ago and he kissed me in the locker room. Rukawa saw it and he got mad. What am I going to do? Yohei, what am I going to do??? I don't wanna hurt Rukawa's feelings. I don't wanna hurt anybody!"
"You think you're not hurting the person you're talking to right now?"
I looked at Yohei. "Y-Y-Y-Yohei.?"
"Yes. I'm in love with you, too. But, what can I do? First of all, I have no skills. I'm no basketball player. I'm no cool dude with a beautiful worked-out body like Mitsui or Rukawa. I'm not a tall guy either. I don't have the looks. I'm a big troublemaker. Why should I compete with two giant forces if I know they have already beaten me? In some way, I have already lost. But still, I wanna be your friend. I wanna help you in any way I can. So now, I'm gonna try helping Mitsui and Rukawa back to you. Because, what are friends for, right? I don't want you to lose your best friend and your crush." He squeezed my hands. "I know you love Mitsui very, very, very much and I know you don't wanna lose Rukawa, too. I wish you all the best in reconciling with them. Open your heart to them. Say you're sorry, too." Yohei said to me.
"What are you talking about? I think you're good-looking, you dweeb!" I cried.
"Really?" he raised an eyebrow. I nodded.
"Oh okay." He smiled.
"Thanks, Yohei." I said. I smiled and gave him a hug.
"Oh Niki, Niki, Niki. It makes me cry, thinking I have already lost in this love battle. I have already been beaten ever since round one hasn't begun." Yohei sighed.
"Oh Yohei. You say the weirdest things!"
+++
I went to the nearest Starbucks coffee shop to get some latte. I was trying to drown all my tears in that drink. I got a cigarette and started to light it.
"That's bad for you." It was Ryota.
"Ryota," I said. "Why are you here?" I put down the cig.
"Um, looking for something to drown my tears in." he answered.
"Oh yeah. Yohei told me Shohoku lost,"
"Uh-huh.Simply because you weren't there."
"Why are you all saying that?" I asked Ryota.
"Because.You're Shohoku's biggest cheerer."
"Ryota. Don't tell this to any one of them." I said.
"What is it?" he asked.
"I love Mitsui." I told him.
"You don't have to tell me. I can feel it. That's why there's always this clash between him and Rukawa." Ryota informed me.
"They're so childish. They did a fistfight in the garden that afternoon. I hate them!" I picked up the cig again. Ryota got it.
"Don't tell me Mitsui can be disciplined better than you are," he said.
"What do you mean?" I asked.
"Mitsui quitted smoking already." Ryota said.
"How nice of him." I said sarcastically.
"Fine. You're mad at them. But I tell you, your heart will melt when they will ask for forgiveness. Especially Mitsui. Remember that bloody gym incident?" he reminded me.
"When he asked for forgiveness from Coach Anzai, everybody's hearts melted.
I looked at Ryota. "Oh Ryota. I really don't know what to do."
"Trust me, you will know what to do as soon as you see him." Ryota grinned at me.
"Thanks, Ryo-chin."
"No problem. Listen, I gotta go. I just bought the latte and these special breads to give to Ayako. She's sad, too." Ryota stood up and started to leave.
"How sweet, Ryota," I said with a smile.
"Just for my Aya-chan," Ryota told me with a broad smile on his face.
"Bye, Ryota," I waved.
"The next time I see you and Mitsui, you must be together again, aight?" Ryota called back.
"I'll try." I smiled.
"Don't just try, do it!" Ryota said.
After Ryota left, I stood up and started to leave. I passed by the garbage can and threw my cigs in it. Thanks, Mitchan.
+++
At the mall, I went to the toyshop. That was my way of releasing my anger and sadness: The toyshop. I looked at the different dolls, video games and collectible cards. Then I saw a cute jack-in-the-box. I opened it and out came messages: I love you, I miss you, Take care, I'M SORRY.
I put down the jack-in-the-box with that message. Again, I remembered Mitsui.
Then I saw Mitsui and Rukawa in the toyshop. What are they both doing here?
"Mitsui, Rukawa. Why are you here?" I asked them.
"NIKI!" they both said in shock. Then, they slowly looked at each other.
"WHY ARE YOU HERE?!" they looked at each other.
Then they started to leave. They just came from the gym, obviously. They were still wearing their jerseys and jackets.
What could those two be doing here? I looked at them both while they were walking away. They bought some stuff. Oh well, must be comfort stuff.
I eyed Mitsui. Then Rukawa. I sighed.
Then I left, too.
+++
I couldn't get myself to sleep. I just kept thinking about Mitsui. I missed him so much.
I was always talking to him. But now, it felt like I haven't talked to him for years. I remembered that I have never opened my cellular phone for almost the whole day.
I opened it. I searched for Mitsui's name in the phonebook. I stared at his number. I touched the "call" button. But I couldn't press it. I was just scared at how he will be towards me after I got mad at him. Knowing Mitsui, I know he'll forgive me but I know it will be a bit hard now. I put down my phone next to me and looked at the clear night sky through my window.
At this time every night, we send messages to each other. I just missed him so much. I thought of the kiss that afternoon. It felt so nice. I relished the feeling of his lips on mine. He was so gentle.
So we fell in love with each other while we were best friends. Maybe being best buddies nurtured our relationship. and we both didn't notice we were both in love with each other. Maybe the treatment will never be the same again.
I thought about the times that he would teach me how to play basketball. How he held my hand when he was teaching me the right position to shoot a three-point shot. How he would wrestle me at the court after I 'cheated' him in our one-on-one games. I tried to giggle while wiping some tears. I thought about the times he hugged me and said that I can do good in Chemistry because he said he sucked in that subject but he was still promoted to the senior level and at that time he was still a bad boy. I thought about the times when he would say I was very pretty even though my hair was a wreck. He often told me I was the most beautiful girl not only in the whole Kanagawa district but also in the whole wide universe. I thought about the days that he would always treat me to a snack in the ice- cream parlor. He would laugh heartily when I drop the ice cream on my spoon to the table because of bickering too much with him but he often ends up wiping the table for me. Not only did I miss his smile, but I missed him too. I missed him so terribly.
What will happen to me tomorrow when school resumes? How will Mitsui be when he sees me? How will Rukawa be?
I felt really sorry for Rukawa. He felt really bad after seeing Mitsui and I kiss each other.
Now it seems he's thinking that I'm just toying him around.
Of course I did have a crush on him but that was just a crush. I was crushing on him because he was so cute and debonair with the chiseled jaw, the beautiful body, his exquisite dark blue eyes and his astounding basketball skills. It was just physical. I realized Rukawa was not really my type. I was in a state of shock because my crushing on Rukawa was at its peak when he proposed to me before. But when Mitsui and I became closer and closer as the days went by, I started to focus my attention on Mitsui more than Rukawa. And as more days went by, I realized that Mitsui was the one that I really loved and Rukawa was just a mere mask to disguise my feelings for Mitsui, since we both made a promise not to love each other.
And there was Yohei Mito, who gave up the love game just to give way to the two. How can I be so stupid not to realize his feelings for me?
Before I went to sleep, I said a little prayer for enlightenment. I hope I could make a decision by tomorrow.
+++
"Kainan! Kainan!" The people were cheering for Kainan, the BEST team in the prefecture.
I watched the people cheer for the best team in Kanagawa as I went to the locker room. It has always been my duty to check Mitsui out if he was okay before he went to a game.
I went inside the locker room. Mitsui was all alone inside.
"Hey, Mitchan," I said and went in front of him. He was still wearing his uniform. The white top and the pants. He was also wearing his Shohoku jacket over his white top, but he took it off.
"Hey yo, Niki," he greeted with a warm smile. "Are you ready for the first game of the finals?"
"Of course I am! I'm so ecstatic that you were able to join!" I excitedly told him.
"Really?" he asked. He grinned. "I am very nervous but, I know that this, too, shall pass."
"Did I disturb you? You haven't dressed up yet in your jersey," I observed.
"Oh, it's okay. There is still 60 minutes to get ready. The others just had to have a small prep talk." He told me.
"Okay, well, I better go now. You've gotta be ready. Good luck!" I said and started to leave.
"Hey Niki," Mitsui called me.
I looked at him. "Yes?"
"Niki. I. I'm really sorry." He said.
"About what?" I asked, looking puzzled.
"I have to tell you this before it gets too late."
"What is it?" I smiled at him.
"I'm sorry. but I broke again my promise to you."
"What is it?" I asked.
"I-I-I. I don't really know how to say it to you. you might get. mad. And I'll lose my bestest friend in the whole wide universe." He told me while looking at me then to the floor.
"Just say it." I told him. I went near to him and looked at him straight in the eye.
"Will you hate me if." he paused. ".I tell you that I'm in love with you.?"
My eyes widened at his words. I unconsciously shook my head while slowly sitting down in shock.
"I'm sorry," he said. "I know you'll be getting mad at what I was going to tell you-"
"But you promised me and I told you that if you fell in love with me I was going to kill you!"
"Then, hell, kill me!" Mitsui exclaimed to me as he opened his top. (By the way my jaw dropped at the sight of his broad chest. ooh la la~~ but I didn't show him I was darn stunned, of course.)
I tried to leave. "Please, Mitsui. leave me alone for a second-"
I wasn't able to continue what I'm saying.
He kissed me.
Omigod. is this really happening? I'm kissing Mitsui.
I was swept away by my emotions. He was touching my face as he kissed me. I held on to his face. I was really in love with Mitsui now, especially since now I know he's a great kisser.
Suddenly, to my horror, I saw Rukawa standing at the door.
Mitsui and I looked at Rukawa.
"Rukawa! I-I."
But Rukawa ran away.
I tried to run after Rukawa.
"Niki! Where are you going?!" Mitsui called after me. But I ran as fast as I could. I lost Mitsui.
Anyway, I caught up with Rukawa. He was at the garden beside the stadium. He was facing the back.
"Rukawa, I-"
"You don't have to explain. You love Mitsui more than me. So what Yohei and Sakuragi said was wrong. Mitsui and you are more than friends. I have lost!"
"Rukawa-"
"What does Mitsui have that I don't have? The looks? Wit? Sense of humor? Skill? Tell me!"
"Kaede, you're wrong! Mitsui and I are close friends-"
"Do close friends French kiss?!"
"Kaede, we were not French kissing-"
"Oh yes you were and I saw it with my own two eyes!"
"I told you that wasn't a French K-"
"But still the thing is, YOU KISSED HIM!"
"Okay! I have to admit, I was swept away by my emotions because-"
"Because he's a good kisser, is that it? Is that it?!" Kaede went to me. Tears of anger and frustration fell down from his face. "Niki. goddamit, I love you so much!"
"Kaede. I like you too but-"
"You only LIKE me? Is that it? Plain liking only?!"
I couldn't speak. I felt like crying. Rukawa is so angry.
"When you were hugging Mitsui in the Shoyo game, I was there wishing I should've been your best friend instead. I was wishing that I was Mitsui and he was me. That way he would feel the pain I feel." Rukawa looked at me straight in the eye. His lips were trembling. "It's painful, what you're doing to me. You're giving me a chance to court you but it seems you're showing me you don't want me to continue doing so. What can I do to make you love me more than Mitsui?!? Do you need a mode of comparison to be able to choose between him and me? Is that it?" he demanded me. He held my shoulders tightly and shook me.
"Rukawa! Stop it, you're hurting me!" I cried. I started to sob, too.
"Whom do you love?!?" he shouted. "Who?!"
"Kaede-"
"I'm sorry for being harsh. I just. love you so much."
"Kaede." I said.
Then Kaede kissed me. (Two guys in a day! Whew~~)
And like what happened a few minutes ago, Mitsui saw what was happening.
He rushed to the scene and pulled Rukawa. "You're harassing her!" Mitsui shouted as he punched Kaede in the face.
They began to fight in the garden.
"STOP IT!!" I shouted. I went to them both and slapped them both.
"You are both so childish! I hate you both!!!" I shouted to them. I ran away, crying.
Why are you both like that?!?
As I ran, I was crying. I think I don't wanna watch the game anymore. I lost my zest for it. I think I just don't wanna see Mitsui and Rukawa for the meantime.
I passed by Youhei. "What's wrong, Niki?" he asked.
I did not answer him. I'm sorry for ignoring you, Yohei.
I ran home.
Assholes.
+++
Ding, dong.
I heard the doorbell ring. I looked out the window. It was Yohei.
I opened the door. "Hey, Mito," I greeted while trying to wipe away the stray tears from my eyes.
"I thought you were going to watch the game," he asked.
"I just don't feel like watching." I answered with a blank expression on my face.
"C'mon, we all know you wanna watch that game. We tried to call you up on your mobile phone but it was closed."
"Oh yeah, I turned it off." I said expressionlessly.
"Shohoku lost," Yohei broke the news to me sadly. I looked at him immediately after he said the bad news. I was shocked. They lost?!?
"You know why?" Yohei asked me.
"W-w-why?" I stammered.
"Because you weren't there. You are Shohoku's biggest cheerer. Mitsui couldn't surpass Jin. because you weren't there to support him." Yohei told me.
"Who cares.? He's a jerk. Him and Rukawa,"
"Really?" Yohei asked me. "There's an uncertainty in your eyes."
"I'm sure." I tried to say but my tears started to flow again.
"Rukawa collapsed in the game. He had very little stamina that time."
"Omigod! Rukawa fainted?!?" I cried. Yohei nodded his head slowly. "Yes. And I think he fainted because you weren't there to support him."
I leaned my head against Yohei's shoulder. I started to cry again. He put an arm around my shoulder.
"Yohei." I said. "I love one of them. But it causes a big conflict. Whom should I choose?"
"Follow your heart. Who do you think is closer to you? Whom do you think does your heart want? Your crush, or your best friend?" Yohei asked me.
"M-my. best friend."
"I told you. You'll fall in love with Mitsui."
"I love Mitsui so much. Rukawa was just like a mask to cover what my true feelings were. because Mitsui and I made a vow that we would not love each other. But we were wrong. He professed his love to me a while ago and he kissed me in the locker room. Rukawa saw it and he got mad. What am I going to do? Yohei, what am I going to do??? I don't wanna hurt Rukawa's feelings. I don't wanna hurt anybody!"
"You think you're not hurting the person you're talking to right now?"
I looked at Yohei. "Y-Y-Y-Yohei.?"
"Yes. I'm in love with you, too. But, what can I do? First of all, I have no skills. I'm no basketball player. I'm no cool dude with a beautiful worked-out body like Mitsui or Rukawa. I'm not a tall guy either. I don't have the looks. I'm a big troublemaker. Why should I compete with two giant forces if I know they have already beaten me? In some way, I have already lost. But still, I wanna be your friend. I wanna help you in any way I can. So now, I'm gonna try helping Mitsui and Rukawa back to you. Because, what are friends for, right? I don't want you to lose your best friend and your crush." He squeezed my hands. "I know you love Mitsui very, very, very much and I know you don't wanna lose Rukawa, too. I wish you all the best in reconciling with them. Open your heart to them. Say you're sorry, too." Yohei said to me.
"What are you talking about? I think you're good-looking, you dweeb!" I cried.
"Really?" he raised an eyebrow. I nodded.
"Oh okay." He smiled.
"Thanks, Yohei." I said. I smiled and gave him a hug.
"Oh Niki, Niki, Niki. It makes me cry, thinking I have already lost in this love battle. I have already been beaten ever since round one hasn't begun." Yohei sighed.
"Oh Yohei. You say the weirdest things!"
+++
I went to the nearest Starbucks coffee shop to get some latte. I was trying to drown all my tears in that drink. I got a cigarette and started to light it.
"That's bad for you." It was Ryota.
"Ryota," I said. "Why are you here?" I put down the cig.
"Um, looking for something to drown my tears in." he answered.
"Oh yeah. Yohei told me Shohoku lost,"
"Uh-huh.Simply because you weren't there."
"Why are you all saying that?" I asked Ryota.
"Because.You're Shohoku's biggest cheerer."
"Ryota. Don't tell this to any one of them." I said.
"What is it?" he asked.
"I love Mitsui." I told him.
"You don't have to tell me. I can feel it. That's why there's always this clash between him and Rukawa." Ryota informed me.
"They're so childish. They did a fistfight in the garden that afternoon. I hate them!" I picked up the cig again. Ryota got it.
"Don't tell me Mitsui can be disciplined better than you are," he said.
"What do you mean?" I asked.
"Mitsui quitted smoking already." Ryota said.
"How nice of him." I said sarcastically.
"Fine. You're mad at them. But I tell you, your heart will melt when they will ask for forgiveness. Especially Mitsui. Remember that bloody gym incident?" he reminded me.
"When he asked for forgiveness from Coach Anzai, everybody's hearts melted.
I looked at Ryota. "Oh Ryota. I really don't know what to do."
"Trust me, you will know what to do as soon as you see him." Ryota grinned at me.
"Thanks, Ryo-chin."
"No problem. Listen, I gotta go. I just bought the latte and these special breads to give to Ayako. She's sad, too." Ryota stood up and started to leave.
"How sweet, Ryota," I said with a smile.
"Just for my Aya-chan," Ryota told me with a broad smile on his face.
"Bye, Ryota," I waved.
"The next time I see you and Mitsui, you must be together again, aight?" Ryota called back.
"I'll try." I smiled.
"Don't just try, do it!" Ryota said.
After Ryota left, I stood up and started to leave. I passed by the garbage can and threw my cigs in it. Thanks, Mitchan.
+++
At the mall, I went to the toyshop. That was my way of releasing my anger and sadness: The toyshop. I looked at the different dolls, video games and collectible cards. Then I saw a cute jack-in-the-box. I opened it and out came messages: I love you, I miss you, Take care, I'M SORRY.
I put down the jack-in-the-box with that message. Again, I remembered Mitsui.
Then I saw Mitsui and Rukawa in the toyshop. What are they both doing here?
"Mitsui, Rukawa. Why are you here?" I asked them.
"NIKI!" they both said in shock. Then, they slowly looked at each other.
"WHY ARE YOU HERE?!" they looked at each other.
Then they started to leave. They just came from the gym, obviously. They were still wearing their jerseys and jackets.
What could those two be doing here? I looked at them both while they were walking away. They bought some stuff. Oh well, must be comfort stuff.
I eyed Mitsui. Then Rukawa. I sighed.
Then I left, too.
+++
I couldn't get myself to sleep. I just kept thinking about Mitsui. I missed him so much.
I was always talking to him. But now, it felt like I haven't talked to him for years. I remembered that I have never opened my cellular phone for almost the whole day.
I opened it. I searched for Mitsui's name in the phonebook. I stared at his number. I touched the "call" button. But I couldn't press it. I was just scared at how he will be towards me after I got mad at him. Knowing Mitsui, I know he'll forgive me but I know it will be a bit hard now. I put down my phone next to me and looked at the clear night sky through my window.
At this time every night, we send messages to each other. I just missed him so much. I thought of the kiss that afternoon. It felt so nice. I relished the feeling of his lips on mine. He was so gentle.
So we fell in love with each other while we were best friends. Maybe being best buddies nurtured our relationship. and we both didn't notice we were both in love with each other. Maybe the treatment will never be the same again.
I thought about the times that he would teach me how to play basketball. How he held my hand when he was teaching me the right position to shoot a three-point shot. How he would wrestle me at the court after I 'cheated' him in our one-on-one games. I tried to giggle while wiping some tears. I thought about the times he hugged me and said that I can do good in Chemistry because he said he sucked in that subject but he was still promoted to the senior level and at that time he was still a bad boy. I thought about the times when he would say I was very pretty even though my hair was a wreck. He often told me I was the most beautiful girl not only in the whole Kanagawa district but also in the whole wide universe. I thought about the days that he would always treat me to a snack in the ice- cream parlor. He would laugh heartily when I drop the ice cream on my spoon to the table because of bickering too much with him but he often ends up wiping the table for me. Not only did I miss his smile, but I missed him too. I missed him so terribly.
What will happen to me tomorrow when school resumes? How will Mitsui be when he sees me? How will Rukawa be?
I felt really sorry for Rukawa. He felt really bad after seeing Mitsui and I kiss each other.
Now it seems he's thinking that I'm just toying him around.
Of course I did have a crush on him but that was just a crush. I was crushing on him because he was so cute and debonair with the chiseled jaw, the beautiful body, his exquisite dark blue eyes and his astounding basketball skills. It was just physical. I realized Rukawa was not really my type. I was in a state of shock because my crushing on Rukawa was at its peak when he proposed to me before. But when Mitsui and I became closer and closer as the days went by, I started to focus my attention on Mitsui more than Rukawa. And as more days went by, I realized that Mitsui was the one that I really loved and Rukawa was just a mere mask to disguise my feelings for Mitsui, since we both made a promise not to love each other.
And there was Yohei Mito, who gave up the love game just to give way to the two. How can I be so stupid not to realize his feelings for me?
Before I went to sleep, I said a little prayer for enlightenment. I hope I could make a decision by tomorrow.
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