A/N: With this chapter, we've officially leaped from PG territory to PG-13 territory...So, for all of you under thirteen...close your eyes!

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Part Four: Hugh've Gotta Be Kidding Me!

"Do you like tequila, Stanley?"

"Yes, he does," Ororo muttered to the television. "And beer, and bourbon, and vodka, and whiskey and--"

Logan gave her a nasty look, and Rogue hit his leg before he could respond. She clutched a pad of paper in her hand and a pencil, determined to keep this "game" as civil as possible before World War III broke out.

"Hush!" She hissed. "I'm tryin' to keep this fair."

"Betcha could do it better without 'Ro's snide little commentaries."

"Quiet, big mouth," Rogue muttered. She glared at Ororo. "An' no more comments from the peanut gallery. Get me?"

"Wouldn't dream of it," Ororo said. "Aha!" She snatched the remote from Rogue and paused the tape. "There. Embarrassing Moment number one."

"Wha-at?" Logan made a face. "C'mon. That ain't embarrassin'. So the blonde forced liquor down the pansy's throat. Big deal."

"Oh, really?" Ororo raised an eyebrow. "So you're saying that if that happened to you in real life that it wouldn't embarrass you? That you wouldn't feel ashamed?"

"That's my idea of a date, princess." He smirked. "'Course, I guess it depends on who's doin' the pourin'. You volunteering?"

Ororo refused to answer him and turned to Rogue. "Judge?"

Rogue sighed. This was going to be harder than she thought. "Well," she said slowly, "if it was real life, I'd feel pretty dang uncomfortable."

"I say it's worth four points," Ororo said smugly.

"Four?" Logan sputtered. "It's not even a one! It ain't even close!"

"Hah," Ororo said, crossing her arms. She hit play on the remote. "I saw your face. You were blushing."

"You wish."

"Now, now," Rogue said. She held up a gloved hand. "I think Wolvie's right. There's no way it's a four."

"Hah."

"But," she continued, "I can't say this ain't an embarrassin' moment. Two points."

Logan huffed uncomfortably and rolled his eyes. "Whatever. Figures you'd be soft on 'Ro."

"An' what's that supposed ta mean?"

"Nothin'. Women are like that, that's all. They embarrass easy. Not like men."

Ororo snorted and turned up the sound on the television, but Wolverine kept talking and stuck a cigar in his mouth. " 'Ooh, he's got his shirt off, ooh, he's wearin' boxers! Ooh, he winked at me!' Gimme a break. Women are just plain skittish about that crap. They're always goin' on and blushin' about every flamin' th...about..." He gulped at the new scene on the television. The new cigar tumbled from his lips. "Oh, *shit*."

"Hey," Rogue's jaw dropped a little. "Is she...Oh, mah Lord--!"

Rogue eyes went wide as she hid her crimson face behind her gloves, but a giggle escaped from her lips. Ororo was speechless. The weather witch had a hand over her mouth and choked back a stunned, nervous laugh. No one in the room moved or stopped the tape because the blonde woman who had previously offered Stanley tequila now had her head in Stanley's lap, performing her rather talented...services.

"Ten!" Ororo screeched. Her laughter was evident now, and small flakes of snow fell from the sky, echoing her mood. "That is a ten-point embarrassing moment!"

Ororo wouldn't stop laughing. Grunting, Logan adjusted his pants and rested his arms on his knees, deciding that the coffee table was far more interesting right now than the movie. He kept praying to all the gods in Hollywood that the scene would just hurry up and end, so he could get his dignity back. "Seven," he muttered to the floor. He winced when Stanley let out a particularly loud moan.

"Oh, she's good, isn't she?" The television asked.

"It's ten, and you know it, Logan!" The snow outside became a mini blizzard.

"Is it over yet?" Rogue asked, peeking between her gloves.

"No!" Logan barked. "Keep yer damn eyes closed!"

Logan lunged for the remote in Ororo's hands, but she snatched her hand away. "Ohhh, no. I am going to enjoy this."

He stopped in mid-growl, realizing what she said. His snarl turned into a dark smirk. "So I was right--you do like the kinky stuff."

"How dare you! I--"

Ororo's retaliation stopped in her throat when a door slam and the sound of multiple packages echoed in the foyer. "Luuucy, I'm hoooome," Bobby crooned.

"Was that supposed to be funny, Popsicle?"

"Yep. Even funnier than your new haircut, Jubes."

"You are so dead."

"Figures," Wolverine muttered, grabbing the remote and turning off the television. "Insult to injury."

"We're in here, Bobby," Rogue piped.

Logan gave her a look that would've killed Sabretooth on the spot. "All I need is one more weather psycho givin' me grief." He glanced at Ororo who was still pretending not to laugh.

Bobby came in, shaking his head, and dumped snow onto the hallway carpet. "Man, can you believe it out there? It's honest to God snowing!"

"Yeah, we know, 'Cube," Jubilee said, struggling with an armload of packages. She dumped them at his feet and gave him a hard look. "You said that a million times already. And I told you t'quit screwin' around with your powers."

"And I told you, Miss Oops-I-Did-It-Again-Wannabe, that I don't have that kind of control." He grinned at the history teacher. "There's only one person I know of who does."

"Ms. Munroe would never do that," Kitty said, trailing them quietly. She glanced politely Ororo, who suddenly had a strange look on her face.

"Hey...Looks like it's clearing up," Bobby said, glancing out the window. A few remaining flakes gently floated past the bay window before the sun peaked through the clouds. He came up behind Rogue and planted his elbows on the couch. Her grin was infectious and he began smiling with her. "Well, this looks cozy. What? What's the deal?"

"Forget it," Wolverine's voice growled loudly. "There ain't nothin' ta see, Iceboy."

"Now I know something's up."

Rogue was still laughing, but she ignored the glares of both Storm and Wolverine and ushered the trio to the other side of the rec room door.

"Rogue--" Wolverine warned over his shoulder.

"Oh, hush, Wolvie. I ain't gonna spill all you're secrets." Her lip quirked. "Yet."

He growled but she had already started talking with Jubilee, Kitty, and Bobby. She had their attention, but couldn't get the words out fast enough before she started laughing again. Seeing her laugh made the others laugh, too.

"What's so funny?"

"This movie...Gawd. Any of y'all ever seen Swordfish?"

"I have," Kitty said, shrugging. "It was terrible. Not one thing in it was realistic. You couldn't possibly get away with what they did, and those hacking scenes were awful!"

Rogue put her hands on her hip. "That's all you saw outta that movie? Bad computer hackin' scenes?"

"Well...yeah. Why else would I want to see it?"

Rogue sighed and rolled her eyes. "You dope. Didn't you see any resemblance between two of those main characters and anyone you know?"

Kitty made a face. "Well, I really only went to see it to get hacking tips. I fast-forwarded past the love scenes."

"Ooh, Katherine!" Rogue shook the girl's shoulders playfully. "You missed out, big time! Those two main characters, Stan an' Ginger, are dead ringers for Miss Munroe an' Logan!"

Kitty wrinkled her nose. "No way. I didn't see that at all."

"Honest?" Bobby peeked his head around the corner and got an eyeful of Logan's scowl. He quickly turned back around. "Well it's gotta be pretty close to the mark if ol' furball's givin' me the evil eye."

"I'll pretend I didn't hear you call him that," Rogue said, imitating Wolverine's scowl. She brightened. "It's so on the mark that these two have a bet goin'."

"What kind of bet?"

"Gawd. I'm too embarrassed t'tell y'all. All ya gotta know is that I'm moderatin' the thing, an' it's turnin' into another Mike Tyson an' Evander Holyfield special."

"I'd pay money to see those two go at it," Jubilee muttered, popping her gum. She blew a huge bubble and glanced over Bobby's shoulder, watching Wolverine cross his arms at her. She waved at him playfully, but he grimaced and turned back to the television. "C'mon, what's the bet about?"

Rogue smirked. "Embarrassin' moments. He who dies first with the reddest face loses."

"Sweet!" Bobby grinned. "I want in on that deal."

"No way," Rogue said, shaking her head. They'd kill me six ways from Sunday. I'm already on thin ice as it is."

"C'mon, what more could Wolfman do but threaten me with his knitting needles?"

"Make you his personal whipping boy in gym class," Kitty said.

"Or use you as his tackling dummy in the Danger Room," Jubilee added.

"Or slice your ice slide when you're not looking," Kitty added.

"Or--"

"Point taken," Bobby said, halting Jubilee in mid-sentence. "Fine. He could make my life miserable. But I still want to see that movie and judge for myself."

"I've got a copy of it upstairs if you really want to see it," Kitty said. "We can watch it on my laptop."

"All right, Kit-Kat! Now you're talkin'!" Bobby slapped her shoulder playfully. "And all this time I thought you were just a computer geek."

"She is," Jubilee said, muttering. "A big ol' 10 on the Nerd-o-Rama meter."

"Keep talking, Jubes, and I won't let you see it with us."

"Yeah, right, like I'm really that curious." But Kitty knew her well enough. They all wanted to see it, and they all wanted to find out just what their teachers had gotten themselves into.

"We can use Allerdyce's microwave to make popcorn." Bobby rubbed his hands together gleefully and Rogue suddenly realized just how much damage she'd done. "I'll have enough dirt to get A's for life. Heck, I bet I won't have to take gym for the rest of my natural born days!"

"Bobby..." Rogue warned.

"Naw, it's cool," he said, but she knew that look. Serious pranks were afoot. He shooed her with his hands. "Go on, take care of your little teachers and keep score for them. Meanwhile," he chuckled evilly, "I'll keep my own little checklist."

"C'mon, Kitty," he said, sauntering to the other side of the room while ignoring both Ororo and Logan's joint glares. He grabbed an armload of packages and bounded up the hallway stairs two at a time. "We've got some serious planning to do."

"It's just a lame movie," Kitty said after him. She ran out of the room and snatched her own package, following him up the stairs. "It's not an Oscar winning masterpiece! It's a really dumb movie!"

"Ahh, but dumb is in the eyes of the beholder."

"And boy, am I looking at dumb."

"Owww," Bobby said. His voice began disappearing around the corner. "You wound me with your quick wit."

"What have I done," Rogue sighed when they were gone.

"Unleashed unspeakable horror on the universe," Jubilee answered, clasping her shoulder. She grabbed Rogue's arm and led her to the other room while seizing her own sizeable packages. "But hey, other than that, no big deal."

"Thanks," Rogue said dryly.

"You're welcome." She trekked slowly up after Kitty and Bobby but half-turned midway up the staircase. Besides, you got the worse of it."

"How so?"

"You gotta face Wolvie now. You know he heard us."

Rogue made a face. "He loves me too much to damage me."

"Wouldn't count on it," Jubilee said. Then she disappeared around the corner, following Bobby and Kitty.

"C'mon. How bad can..." she trailed off when she turned around, catching the eye of her scowling teachers. "Er...I'm dead, ain't I?"

"Doesn't even begin to describe it," Wolverine growled. He stabbed the couch with his index finger and commanded her to sit.

"Rogue," Ororo began, "I'm still preparing ideas for your next class history project. Would you prefer a ten page essay report, or a thirty page thesis?"

"Ah'm sooo dead," she said, flopping on the couch between them. "Me an' my big southern mouth."

"First thing you've said right in twenty minutes," Logan muttered.

"Well, you could always call off the bet," Rogue offered.

"And let Sno-Cone face get the better of us?" Logan stabbed the remote, wincing at the look on Stanley's face. "Nothin' doin'. It's a whole new ballgame now."

"It was a private bet," Ororo added, "but now, unfortunately, it is quite public and possibly cannon fodder for a new barrage of practical jokes."

"Well, they probably would've seen the movie anyways," Rogue said, sinking lower in her seat. "I only pushed 'em to see it quicker."

"Yeah, but no thanks to you, they wouldn't have put two an' two together. Now we'll forever be known as 'Stan and Ginger.' Nice goin', blabbermouth.'"

"All, right, all right," she huffed. She folded her arms and glared at the television. "But it ain't like I'm an adult. What'd you expect? Teenagers can't keep secrets. It's a law of nature. 'Sides, I'd think the people you'd really be mad at are Scott an' Jean. They started this whole mess."

An idea dawned on Ororo and Logan's faces while they exchanged evil looks.

"Yeah, they did push this on us. It's all their fault."

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking, Logan?"

Wolverine started grinning like a feral idiot. "Could be, goddess. Could be."

Rogue groaned and hid her face in her hands. "I just had to go there."

How much worse could things get--? Let's find out! ;-)