Voldie Goes to Mordor: Part 1
By: Paw M., Paw Weasley/Wood/Malfoy/Greenleaf and Cousin Funf (aka angua27) Also Know as "The Uruk-hai Hotties" because orcs are hot.
Okay, now for the disclaimer, We don't own anything...and I mean nothing. See Bob down there? We don't own him either 'cos Brekke does. Hi Brekke! We also are not responsible for fits of anger (especially by Jeff) induced by the treatment of our two favourite series. Well, hope you enjoy! R/R
Voldie: Hi. I am soooooooo a Dark Lord.
Saruman: Me too!
Voldie: Well, yeah, but you have to get a stupid ring to gain power and rule the world, whereas, I just get my Death Eater homies to do their thing.
Saruman: Not entirely, Vdawg. You're always stopped by some random little kid, Harriet Potter or something.
Voldie: It's Harry Potter, and me and him are like best buds now! So HA!
Frodo: (with Brittish accent) MUST - PUT - RING -ON!!!
Voldie: Wazzup, my hobbit?
Frodo: Oh, not much. I was just passing through Mordor and I stopped in.
Saruman: Frodo! Still got that ring?
Frodo: Yeah, why?
Voldie: Ooo! Ooo! Can I try it on?
Frodo: Sure. You're already evil enough!
Voldie: (with ring on) My body's gone!
Harry: Hey Vdawg! Ya gonna introduce me? Yo?
Voldie: Oh. This is my new bud Saruman...he's a dark lord also.
Saruman: Glad to meet you.
Frodo: Ow! Watch it you!
Harry: Oh, sorry. Didn't see you down there.
Frodo; That's okay, I get that a lot. Nice cloak.
Harry: I can be invisible with it on...wanna try?
Frodo: Nah. I have my ring...watch (puts ring on).
Harry: Dude! That was bloody wicked!
Voldie: So how many times have you attempted to kill Frodo?
Saruman: Oh, my orcs and riders usually try to hunt him down to give him a scare.
Voldie: Well, Harry has had quite a few attempts on his life...huh buddy? (nudge, nudge)
Harry: Umm...yeah. Have you seen my scar Frodo?
Frodo: No. (sees scar) That's the scar?! I've seen bloody worse than that boy!
Harry: That was unexpected! Usually people just stare and say wicked!
Frodo: Well I am a hobbit from Middle Earth. What do you expect?
Harry: Oh. Okay.
Frodo: Okay, okay. To make you happy just this once...Wicked!
Ronnie: Hey! That's my line you bloody hobbit!
Frodo: Hobbits aren't bloody and if you really wanted to insult my race you'd say halfling.
Ronnie: Yeah, well, I am like so much cooler than you. I have a rat and a magical wand.
Frodo: Why am I trying to reason with you?! I am bloody 50 years old and I have beautiful sproingy hair.
Ronnie: Why yes it is delightfully sproingy!
Harry: Oi! Enough with the comments on looks and yes Ronnie, I know pastels would work perfectly with him.
Ronnie: Why yes!
Fodo: Ummm... I'm gonna check on Sam now.
Ron: Sammy! How's it goin' in da ghetto?
Sam: Uh, ok. Master Frodo! Oh my gosh, like, are you okay? Let's leave like right away!
Frodo: Nein! I need to talk with Ronald about how to decorate my new house! You know, matching towels, pink lacy curtains...
Sam: Aaaaahh! I'll be going now...
Legolas: Yo. I'm devilishly good looking.
Harry: I know.
Arwen: Get away from my elf, dude!
Ollie: Hi. I'm more devilishly good looking than Legolas, and I'm single!
Arwen: Oh, well in that case, forget the elf, I'll take you, Ollie!
Ogg: Hi. That's sehr summat. Bye.
Davey Gludgeon: IT'S A SCONE!
Lisa Turpin: (breaks out in hysterical laughter)
Hermione: Um, yeah. Anyway, Ollie is soooo mine.
Arwen: Is not!
Hermione: Is too!
Arwen: Is not!
Hermione: Is too!
Arwen: Oh yeah, well, yo mama's armpits are so hairy that I though she had Don King in a headlock.
Hemione: Yeah well yo mama's so fat -
Ollie: Girls there is enough of me to go around. Besides, I am bloody brilliant.
Ronnie: No! I am. Dude, guys! Stop taking my lines.
Eloise Midgen: Du hast meine Karte!
Ronnie: What?!
Legolas: I know you love me, but at least say it in English - or at least Elfish.
Ollie: No! She loves me!
Legolas: Me!
Ollie: Me!
(they start to fight)
Ronald: Why are you guys arguing over her? She has a pimple that makes her look like Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer!
Ollie: Or Frost the Snowman! Thumpety Thump Thump, Thumpety Thump!
James Potter: Look at Frosty go!
Harry: Father!
James: Ummm....OOO! I am not really here! (aside: Dang, now I gotta run off again.)
Bob: Huh?
Lilly: James, deer (a/n Get it?) , are you out in the realm of the living without a jacket on again? Oh, my, how many times must I tell you...
Harry: Mother!
Lilly: Oh, now look what you've been and gone and done! C'mon James, my deer, we must return.
Hugo Bracegirdle: Yo my homies! I'm in da Shire!
Dumbledore: Go Hugo! Go Hugo!
Gandalf: Oh, hello Albus, I hear you're a slightly eccentric, buy benevolent guardian as well.
Dumbly: Oh, why yes, I am. By the way, tinfoil.
Gandalf: Oh, really, well...how...um...nice. Now, Frodo, I am going. I don't know when - or if - I'll be back.
Frodo: Kay. See you tomorrow.
Gandalf: Sure.
To Be Continued
Yes! To be continued is what I said. Will Voldie ever get to Mordor? Will Legolas and Oliver Wood settle their disputes? Will Dumbledore break dance? You will find out all this and more in...The Next Chapter. MwhahahaSNORThahahah!
P.S. Do you realize how many little squiggly red lines are on my screen. It's horrible! I hate spell check! IT SHOULD GO BACK TO THE FIRE FROM WHENCE IT CAME! Sorry, had to get that out of my system. Thanks.
By: Paw M., Paw Weasley/Wood/Malfoy/Greenleaf and Cousin Funf (aka angua27) Also Know as "The Uruk-hai Hotties" because orcs are hot.
Okay, now for the disclaimer, We don't own anything...and I mean nothing. See Bob down there? We don't own him either 'cos Brekke does. Hi Brekke! We also are not responsible for fits of anger (especially by Jeff) induced by the treatment of our two favourite series. Well, hope you enjoy! R/R
Voldie: Hi. I am soooooooo a Dark Lord.
Saruman: Me too!
Voldie: Well, yeah, but you have to get a stupid ring to gain power and rule the world, whereas, I just get my Death Eater homies to do their thing.
Saruman: Not entirely, Vdawg. You're always stopped by some random little kid, Harriet Potter or something.
Voldie: It's Harry Potter, and me and him are like best buds now! So HA!
Frodo: (with Brittish accent) MUST - PUT - RING -ON!!!
Voldie: Wazzup, my hobbit?
Frodo: Oh, not much. I was just passing through Mordor and I stopped in.
Saruman: Frodo! Still got that ring?
Frodo: Yeah, why?
Voldie: Ooo! Ooo! Can I try it on?
Frodo: Sure. You're already evil enough!
Voldie: (with ring on) My body's gone!
Harry: Hey Vdawg! Ya gonna introduce me? Yo?
Voldie: Oh. This is my new bud Saruman...he's a dark lord also.
Saruman: Glad to meet you.
Frodo: Ow! Watch it you!
Harry: Oh, sorry. Didn't see you down there.
Frodo; That's okay, I get that a lot. Nice cloak.
Harry: I can be invisible with it on...wanna try?
Frodo: Nah. I have my ring...watch (puts ring on).
Harry: Dude! That was bloody wicked!
Voldie: So how many times have you attempted to kill Frodo?
Saruman: Oh, my orcs and riders usually try to hunt him down to give him a scare.
Voldie: Well, Harry has had quite a few attempts on his life...huh buddy? (nudge, nudge)
Harry: Umm...yeah. Have you seen my scar Frodo?
Frodo: No. (sees scar) That's the scar?! I've seen bloody worse than that boy!
Harry: That was unexpected! Usually people just stare and say wicked!
Frodo: Well I am a hobbit from Middle Earth. What do you expect?
Harry: Oh. Okay.
Frodo: Okay, okay. To make you happy just this once...Wicked!
Ronnie: Hey! That's my line you bloody hobbit!
Frodo: Hobbits aren't bloody and if you really wanted to insult my race you'd say halfling.
Ronnie: Yeah, well, I am like so much cooler than you. I have a rat and a magical wand.
Frodo: Why am I trying to reason with you?! I am bloody 50 years old and I have beautiful sproingy hair.
Ronnie: Why yes it is delightfully sproingy!
Harry: Oi! Enough with the comments on looks and yes Ronnie, I know pastels would work perfectly with him.
Ronnie: Why yes!
Fodo: Ummm... I'm gonna check on Sam now.
Ron: Sammy! How's it goin' in da ghetto?
Sam: Uh, ok. Master Frodo! Oh my gosh, like, are you okay? Let's leave like right away!
Frodo: Nein! I need to talk with Ronald about how to decorate my new house! You know, matching towels, pink lacy curtains...
Sam: Aaaaahh! I'll be going now...
Legolas: Yo. I'm devilishly good looking.
Harry: I know.
Arwen: Get away from my elf, dude!
Ollie: Hi. I'm more devilishly good looking than Legolas, and I'm single!
Arwen: Oh, well in that case, forget the elf, I'll take you, Ollie!
Ogg: Hi. That's sehr summat. Bye.
Davey Gludgeon: IT'S A SCONE!
Lisa Turpin: (breaks out in hysterical laughter)
Hermione: Um, yeah. Anyway, Ollie is soooo mine.
Arwen: Is not!
Hermione: Is too!
Arwen: Is not!
Hermione: Is too!
Arwen: Oh yeah, well, yo mama's armpits are so hairy that I though she had Don King in a headlock.
Hemione: Yeah well yo mama's so fat -
Ollie: Girls there is enough of me to go around. Besides, I am bloody brilliant.
Ronnie: No! I am. Dude, guys! Stop taking my lines.
Eloise Midgen: Du hast meine Karte!
Ronnie: What?!
Legolas: I know you love me, but at least say it in English - or at least Elfish.
Ollie: No! She loves me!
Legolas: Me!
Ollie: Me!
(they start to fight)
Ronald: Why are you guys arguing over her? She has a pimple that makes her look like Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer!
Ollie: Or Frost the Snowman! Thumpety Thump Thump, Thumpety Thump!
James Potter: Look at Frosty go!
Harry: Father!
James: Ummm....OOO! I am not really here! (aside: Dang, now I gotta run off again.)
Bob: Huh?
Lilly: James, deer (a/n Get it?) , are you out in the realm of the living without a jacket on again? Oh, my, how many times must I tell you...
Harry: Mother!
Lilly: Oh, now look what you've been and gone and done! C'mon James, my deer, we must return.
Hugo Bracegirdle: Yo my homies! I'm in da Shire!
Dumbledore: Go Hugo! Go Hugo!
Gandalf: Oh, hello Albus, I hear you're a slightly eccentric, buy benevolent guardian as well.
Dumbly: Oh, why yes, I am. By the way, tinfoil.
Gandalf: Oh, really, well...how...um...nice. Now, Frodo, I am going. I don't know when - or if - I'll be back.
Frodo: Kay. See you tomorrow.
Gandalf: Sure.
To Be Continued
Yes! To be continued is what I said. Will Voldie ever get to Mordor? Will Legolas and Oliver Wood settle their disputes? Will Dumbledore break dance? You will find out all this and more in...The Next Chapter. MwhahahaSNORThahahah!
P.S. Do you realize how many little squiggly red lines are on my screen. It's horrible! I hate spell check! IT SHOULD GO BACK TO THE FIRE FROM WHENCE IT CAME! Sorry, had to get that out of my system. Thanks.