A Elbereth Gilthoniel,
Siliveren penna mírel
O menel aglar elenath!
Na-chaered palan-díriel
O galadhremmin ennorath,
Fanuilos, le linnathon
Nef aear, sí nef aearon!
J. R. R. Tolkien, the Fellowship of the Ring
_______________________________________________________________________
The weeks following James' confession to me were some of the greatest in my life. Because of the increasing Dark activity, there were non-student scouts constantly patrolling the perimeter of the grounds. On occasion, Kelvar and I were sent into the Forbidden Forest, because we knew the area best, and best how to evade danger. We did not want to evade danger though, for phoenixes have an adventurous streak buried inside everything else. James, Remus, Sirius, and Peter had taught Kelvar and I how to have fun, and it involved being reckless at times. One time James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter convinced us to take them with us on our scouting trips. They were smuggled out under the invisiblily cloak on a Saturday evening. It was quite an event.
"Hmmm, so this is what the interior of the Forbidden Forest looks like, hmmm?" Sirius stated, surveying the lands. "Oh dear, we should have brought Remus. Full moon tonight, hmmm?" he said with a sidelong glance at me. "Well, lets get started." James, who could almost fully understand me, now, muttered something about Sirius being a bee.
"So, are we going to split up?" Remus asked me. "It seems logical."
"Of course," I said. "Who is going with who, and how many in each group?" I asked the boys.
"Hmmm... since there are only two of us here who know this forest, and there are six of us, we will go in threes, one navigator among each group," James and Sirius responded, parts of their speech in unison, others off beat. "Nominate the pickers for each group," Sirius said. Everyone nominated James and Sirius, even themselves, who each voted for the other one. James stood formally in the center of our little group and bowed once, twice, thrice, while Sirius stood by and pretended to blush. Peter fake-punched James in the stomach and Remus patted Sirius sympathetically. Kelvar and I took wing and circled the air 'till Remus and Sirius got that we were impatient.
"Hmmm... I want Kelvar for my navigator," Sirius said, surveying the group. That left me with James, which went without saying.
"I'll take Remus," James said, it being his turn to pick first.
"Poor Peter..." Remus said. "Always last to get picked."
"Poor Peter? Poor Sirius is more like it! I have to live with that doofus?" Peter accepted this without shame, indeed, stuck his chest out as though he had been paid a great compliment. Kelvar circled the boys, impatient to set off.
"Ahem, one more thing, if you get into trouble, send up red sparks," James said, serious again. I led James and Remus into the woods, my homeland. Homeland? One could not call the Forbidden Forest a home. The term 'home' implies a place that you love, a place where you live and enjoy. Home? No. House? Maybe. Haven? Perhaps it was safer than other places, but there were many better places to stay.
Remus was impatient for action. He bounced around, jumping here and there. I finally told him to climb a tree, and lifted him to the first branch of one. He eagerly jumped up to the top branches and yelled down that he was mad at me for being a phoenix, thus bird, and him being a human, restrained to the ground. Then he nearly fell out.
I flew up to him in haste, wondering what could have frightened him so much. I landed next to him, and asked him anxiously what had transpired.
"By Salazar's wand, a phoenix, or it looked like one, twice your size, black as midnight." He was panting, and I stared at him.
"Black?" I asked
"As the space behind a nebula."
"Remus, get out of here."
"What? Why?" He asked, clearly puzzled.
"That was a Phoenix, you judged right, but a there are only one in one-thousand Black phoenixes born to a female. They live extraordinary long lifetimes, even for a phoenix, cannot learn any language but their own, and are deadly to werewolves. I could list their characteristics for an hour or more, but get out of here!" I grabbed his arm and flew him down to James, where Remus gave a short explanation and dashed away, James at his heels. I had no idea what I was going to do. Perhaps go up and talk? About what? Perhaps the best idea was to go report to Dumbledore. Our scouting job was not finished, though. Suddenly, I had an idea, something to do rather than sitting on a tree branch. I hurtled down at breakneck speed and flew in the general direction that James and Remus had run in. As I just barely skimmed the top of their heads, I spoke one word: 'Dumbledore.'
I had to get back fast, and I thought of doing a flip to get me turned around faster, but decided against it. I had never done a barrel roll or a flip in the air, and wanted to keep it that way. I turned sharply, expecting to see the Black phoenix looming up in front of me, but I saw no one. I looked for the tallest tree there was in the forest, and found one tall enough to suit my needs. I perched, not on the uppermost branches, but the ones hightest that would support a Black phoenix. I puffed out my chest, held my tail, longer than most, high in the air, hoping against hope that I was not committing suicide. I let a great warning call go out, to tell the other phoenix that there was another occupant who claimed dominance, and that this one had human allies. I heard nothing in response. I swiveled my head around to see if perhaps the other one was there... and saw nothing. I cocked my head to the side. Something was wrong. I turned to the other side, and suddenly found myself rolling across the tree branch curled up. The phoenix had hurtled straight for me as soon as I turned my head to the side. I straightened myself, and stood staring up into the eyes of a majestic creature. I checked his magical aurora, and much to my surprise there was no evil in it. So I stared back at him, having no fear of what might come to me, now that I knew he was not evil. My thoughts of good and evil were interrupted by the Black's first words. It seemed to me that if someone had put our words onto a sheet of paper as music, his part would have been played by the bass, and mine by the viola.
"You have no friends here, they have not arrived yet." So he knew that I had sent Remus and James for Albus. "I am king of this forest. In your absence I have taken over."
"Do you serve the Dark Ones?" saying their name as a phoenix would refer to them, and knowing the answer already. He looked at me, as though trying to decide whether to answer, or whether I was stupid and not worth his time. I waited calmly.
"No, the Dark Ones have tried to overpower me several times. They will try many more. They will not succeed." He spoke this as a simple statement, rather as when a feather is dropped in flight, it falls to the ground. It was a fact, not something that he hoped or thought. For that matter, everything that he had said so far had been a fact. Well, it proved he was honest.
"You are a more noble phoenix than I have seen. My name is Fawkes," I said, deciding to trust him with my name.
He looked at me and cocked his head. "If you would trust a Black with your name, and one that just nearly killed you, I would say that you are also noble. Did you have rule over this forest before I came here?"
"Indeed."
"Come then, show me the east edges of the forest. I am not familiar with the east. 'Tis a dangerous place." I considered. The east was the side closest to Hogwarts castle, and I assumed that I could get the Black introduced to Albus easier there. I nodded my agreement.
"Then let us set off."
I had had the most experience with the east side, so thus it was not hard to show the Black around, and warn him of what to beware of. As I waited for Albus, I thought that the Black was good company, though he spoke solemnly and rarely. Soon I saw Albus walking calmly through the trees.
"King," I said, not yet knowing his name, "this is Albus Dumbledore. A friend of mine, and, though a human, he shows no claim of dominance over the Birds," I said referring to phoenixes as we do occasionally. The Black nodded his great head, and Albus bowed, when he reached us.
"May your nestlings always be happy," he said, in the Language of the Phoenix. He did not sing nearly as well as James, though. "May I ask your name?" I averted my eyes for a split second, as it was very impolite to ask one's name, before they had offered it.
The Black saw it, and realised that I had not told Albus about this custom, nor even prepared for this encounter at all. He learns a great deal from your every move, I thought in amazement, for I had never seen anyone do it as well as him. "Elbereth," he said. Albus inhaled very quickly, and I turned to look at him.
"Albus? Are you alright?" He nodded, calm again.
"Elbereth is the name of an elf, an almost sacred character in the Lord of the Rings muggle series. It was my favorite childhood series, though it was written by muggles." Elbereth smiled slightly, as well as a phoenix can.
"I know the feeling."
Things went fine after that. Albus invited the huge Black phoenix to stay at Hogwarts, and he declined with majestic politeness. When it was about time for dinner, I realised that I had completely forgotten about Sirius, Peter, and Kelvar. Albus and I were making our good-byes anyhow, and I hurtled up to the castle, muttering a hurried apology to Albus as I sped past him. To my very great relief, James, Remus, Sirius, and Peter were all sitting at the Gryfindor table. Kelvar was with Lily and Cecilia. I flew up to the High Table to tell the staff where Albus was. I then flew back down to the boys.
"Fawkes, what was that thing?" Peter asked, evidently having heard the stories, just not been able to believe them, or hadn't gotten out of Remus and James what it was.
"It was a Black phoenix. Have you read about them?" James, Remus, and Peter shook their heads, but Sirius paused.
"Haven't we, though? In Professor Binns class, he was noting how phoenixes used to get involved in goblin affairs, and he brought up the fact that, more often than not, Black phoenixes sided with the goblins. Then he got into them remember? Wanted us to write a paper on them, and then realised that there probably wasn't enough stuff in the library on them to make a two inch long paper." James was nodding his head, but Remus and Peter still didn't remember. "Ok, well, we did, so there," Sirius said, looking exasperatedly in between Peter and Remus.
"What is this about Black phoenixes being a deadly peril to werewolves?" Remus wanted to know.
"The magical makeup of a Black phoenix automatically triggers the werewolf transformation, if the werewolf is around for too long. The werewolf will then go crazy, something like rabies. It will storm around in a rage, and then fall to the ground unable to move because of the thirst they neglected during their rampage. However, you do know about the Wolfsbane potion being researched? From it's makeup, it sounds as if a werewolf could take this potion and be perfectly safe from a Black phoenix," I said, knowing that this news would come as a delight to Remus.
The dinner was quite enjoyable after that, and I went up to my nest in the Gryffindor common room, ready for a long sleep. I reflected then, on Elbereth, and thought that I should perhaps read this 'Lord of the Rings.'
Breakfast the next morning was excellent, better even, than most. I got fresh tuna and rainbow fish. The meal went by quickly.
I flew down to the Forbidden Forest, to notify Elbereth of Remus's predicament. He didn't look like he had gotten much sleep, and I did not know how angry a Black phoenix could get, so I left with all haste. I went to the Library with James and Remus to finish up a paper on Animagi. While they were looking up books on Animagi transformations, I went hunting for books on Black phoenixes. I found nothing.
The day passed just as quickly as breakfast had, after I came back from the library.
The next few weeks, leading up to Thanksgiving were great fun. The Marauder's were not nearly as active as I had heard that they were in recent years. After that first prank on the train, not much else was pulled, until Christmas. Elbereth and I got to know each other very well, though he never did speak much. I looked up 'The Hobbit' among Albus's personal library, and started the book. I was up long hours, teaching myself to read the English language fully enough to understand J. R. R. Tolkein's queer language. After I finished that, I started on The Fellowship of the Ring. When I came to the Elvish poem* with Elbereth's name I spent a long time learning how to say the words in my native language, and then memorizing it. Albus was also busy. He was contending with the uprising Dark Arts, and negotiating with Elbereth. Elbereth was already our patrol group, and he was effective, since he kept the werewolves out of the forest, or simply killed them. When he did make them go on a rampage, he would swoop down and break their neck. Once, on a particularly large one, I had to help.
Around Thanksgiving, Kelvar and I were sent to a village on the outskirts of London. That village was supposedly targeted for the first real raid of the Dark forces. The only reason Kelvar and I were there, was because we would be more effective in fighting Dementors than humans. Once Lord Voldemort heard that his dementor's would no longer be as effective because there were several phoenixes there, he left off the attack. Kelvar and I were stationed there as if we were in the army, for about a month. "It will be a classroom for the human world, one for someone of all ages," Albus had said when trying to convince me to go.
"But I do not like the curriculum," I retorted. I detest war with every fiber in my body.
When Kelvar and I returned, we found that there had been some slight changes to Hogwarts castle. There was now a password for every door, including the front doors. The castle had been searched top to bottom, and a few more secret passageways were blocked off, and no longer secret. That was just about all, though except that fewer students were allowed out after dark, and any one found roaming the castle at night were given detention and had thirty points taken from their house. James and Sirius were still up and about at night, they just knew how to stay hidden. Occasionally Remus and Peter would come too, but they had to work harder for their O. W. L.'s, which would come in March. I had to reread much of The Fellowship of the Ring in order to start on The Two Towers, as I had lost my place in my month away from home, in a place where I was on my guard at all times. Albus seemed very busy then, and we rarely spoke. Christmas came quickly.
I had done nothing to prepare for Christmas, it seemed that the time had passed so quickly. Christmas Day came all to soon. Even had I wanted to, I could not have gotten anyone any sort of gift, as I had no money. Phoenixes have no need for money. I could go out and fetch them a fish or something, but I doubt anyone but Kelvar would like that. Remus and James, however, had noticed how much time I spent with my beak inside The Two Towers, and had gone through much trouble with their parents to get me a copy of all four books. I thanked them profoundly, and was unable to set my voice back on tune for quite a while.
Albus had gotten me a poetry book, with all sorts of poems, large and small. I enjoyed it immensely. Kelvar and I went fishing for each other. I brought her a bass, knowing it was her favorite. She dropped a rainbow fish at my talons, and had it all cleaned up for me.
I spent much of my time with Elbereth now, helping him clear the forest. It was a marvel to work with him, it seemed that he could have taken on a basilisk if he wanted. A few days after Christmas, he did. He spotted the giant snake slithering through a pile of leaves.
"Listen. I am going to go over to that tree, and await your signal," he pointed to a tree almost directly opposite us. "You will go down and draw the basilisks head in the opposite direction, and do not drop eye contact with it! You will signal me, and I shall hurtle down like the lightning of Zeus." This seemed to be a ritual of his. Before tackling an enemy, he would give an example as to what he would be like, what he would imitate. What is your signal?" I thought a moment and then demonstrated, bending my wings inward so that my feathers pointed at my crest. "Good," he said, and then flew off to the tree he had pointed to. I took a deep breath, and took wing. I flew down to where the basilisk had slithered. I let out a hunting cry, drawing its attention. He reared up and I circled his head. I drew the back of his neck away, and then quickly gave the signal. True to his word, Elbereth flew straight out, almost a second after I had given the signal. Talons leading he smashed into the basilisk's neck, and as I pulled up I could see him clenching and unclenching his talons. In a few seconds the basilisk lay dead. I watched the thing sway, in its death throes, and then fall with a dead thump to the ground. I knew Elbereth did not take pleasure in this, to him it was simply a necessity. I flew over to where he had settled himself on a rock in a stream, to wash off.
"Elbereth," I said as I helped him to wash his talons, and indeed, his legs. "When you get out there, on the battlefield, are you really yourself? Or does some demon inhabit you, some god or goddess inhabit you, simply using you for their purposes?"
Elbereth considered for a long time before answering. "I think that when one is on a battlefield, they know who they are fighting for, and what the reality is, that they are taking lives, and ruining spirits. But I do not know that one is really in control of his actions. In the heat of battle, with magic and adrenaline flowing in you if you are a wizard, and with adrenaline flowing in you if you are a muggle, you do not quite have control. So then, a God who is siding with you inhabits you. However, I think that whether you fight with honor, or whether just to win, is determined by you. Thus you can choose the God who controls your body, but he still controls you."
I considered these words for a long time. Even though it was the dead of winter, I stood in the deepest part of the stream and cleaned myself as I had not done in several weeks. I cleaned and thought. I remembered the words of the poem; A Elbereth, Gilthoniel, and I knew then that Elbereth had chosen a god who was good, honorable, and an excellent fighter. I thought about the battle with the basilisk, and wondered which god I had chosen.
The next few days were dreary and cold. Remus endured another transformation during those days. I spent all my time in the castle, except once when I ventured out to invite Elbereth in. He declined. I went to Kelvar's nest (for she always did make better nests than I did) and dropped my beak into the Two Towers. So far I did not like it nearly as much as The Fellowship of the Ring, but it was still good. Elbereth's speech after the battle with the basilisk stayed in my mind. I tried to decide which god or goddess Aragorn had chosen, or which small Sam Gamgee had picked. For one might have been better in battle than the other, but each was still forced to enter combat.
After the cold had passed, I spent all my time either with The Marauders or with Elbereth and Kelvar, who had become good friends also.
"You know, I want to take a look at the bottom of that lake," James said one day, while we were walking around the lake with our toast. "I really want to look at the bottom of that lake."
"What d'you expect to find down there?" Peter asked with a snigger.
"I dunno, maybe some mermaids. Grindylows. Who knows, maybe even the giant squid?" James responded, choosing to ignore Peter's snigger.
"James, James. Don't you ever pay attention in class?" Sirius said shaking his head in mock sympathy. "Professor Sachel was telling us about underwater trips just a few weeks ago. He said that your best chance would be human transfiguration, or the Bubble Head Charm."
"Thanks, Sirius!" James said, and with out another word cast a warming spell on himself, dove into the water, and transfigured himself into a dolphin. Sirius, Remus, and Peter gaped after him. Sirius shook his head again.
"Bad form. He had to do it in broad daylight! And on the near side of the lake, too. I fear the man has gone completely out of his wits." Peter and Remus nodded.
"So we just have to go in and help him!" Remus said, his face breaking into a smile.
"Of course! Would we leave a friend, mad or not, in the lake alone? Absolutely not!" Peter said. I stared at the three of them, and laughed softly. "What?" Peter asked me.
"How am I going to make it through?" I asked them. They stared at me.
"Surely you weren't expecting to go in with us?" Remus asked.
"Come, would you leave me on the shores alone?" I asked.
" Well, no, but..."
"We wouldn't normally but..."
"Oh come on, just get it out in the open!" Sirius said. "Fawkes, James does not normally do things like that. We would like to find out what he is up to. And we were reading the other day about how phoenixes can't swim."
"Well, has it ever been proven?" I asked.
"Yes."
"Then consider me out of the ordinary."
"Er... Fawkes, have you ever tried to swim?"
"Well, I don't believe so, but I am sure I can manage."
"Fawkes, stand to sense-"
"As you are doing?" I asked pointedly. Sirius and Remus grinned.
"Ok, you win," Remus said, grinning broadly. Sirius and Peter nodded solemnly. Remus and Sirius drew their wands, and cast the spells on me, then on each other, while Peter fumbled with his. After a few moments, we were ready to go. We walked around to where we were just out of sight of the castle. Remus and Sirius went first, each diving into the lake effortlessly and perfectly in unison, looking as though they had been born to the water. Peter and I followed, being slower and having less experience with the water. I took to the air, and then hurtled down in a fine dive, but for the fact that I did not pull up when I should have normally, as so to avoid the ground. As I hit the water, I knew immediately that I could live in this water. It was like flying, only in slow motion, as the liquid slowed your motions down. The water was more soothing than the air, and I knew that in this place I would not fall. The normal rules did not apply in the water. Oh it was bliss... I have been told what the Imperius Curse feels like, and I think the water was just the same.
As soon as I had mastered slow-motion flying, I flew over to where Sirius, Remus, and Peter were hovering. Sirius nodded to us and we set off looking for James. Suddenly Remus spun around, and pulled upright. He pointed to a human figure, swimming in the opposite direction. We hurtled off, plummeting into the deep.
We soon caught up to James, who was looking at a group of grindylows, though he kept his distance. He was fingering his wand, as though wondering if he would need it. Then he heard us coming, and spun around. When he realised who we were, he waved to us. He tried to speak, and we could just barely understand him.
"Merpeople!" he bubbled. "Beyond that horde..." He gestured towards the grindylows. The four of them grinned at each other, and drew their wands. I watched in amazement.
"You are not thinking of attacking them, are you?" I sang anxiously. "I should hope not..." I said, in a quieter voice.
"Oh, no, just getting past them," Remus said mischievously. "Fawkes, you can participate if you want, but if you would like, you can just circle around them."
"I think that I will go with you. There is safety in numbers," I said, not believing my own words, not with these four.
Thus it was, that a few minutes later, we could be seen nursing small wounds, and setting off to see the merpeople - whoever they were.
The merpeople turned out to be rather . . . overvalued, shall I say? They seemed to me rather like humans, but for their legs, which were not legs at all, but fins. James and Sirius had fun teasing their odd ways, and I spent my time learning better how to fly in this water. After about fifteen minutes watching the merpeople, we set off back towards the shore. Remus claimed he saw the giant squid, and it was not until Peter said he had too that I believed it.
I begged the others to let me stay in for a while, and they agreed. Sirius said he'd come; he wanted a glimpse of the giant squid too. So we set off, and Sirius got his wish.
We were swimming the perimeter of the lake when I nudged Sirius and motioned with my wing towards the center. It was the giant squid. Sirius's eyes went wide and he motioned towards the giant squid, indicating that we should swim to it. We hurtled off, Sirius in the lead. We got as close as we could before the squid turned and shot off into the darkness. Sirius looked like he had wanted a closer look. I was glad we had only gotten as far as we had.
I very rarely went into the lake again, though I started taking frequent baths in a tub. Kelvar was amazed at me. I told her what happened, and she tried it herself, though she didn't like it nearly as much as I did, though she still enjoyed it.
The months of the winter passed in a blur, as before. I cannot understand why time was flying so fast, escaping my grip.
It was late March before time slowed again. I had done very little the past months, other than talk with my friends. Elbereth had his talons full with werewolves; they were filling the forest faster than he had imagined they could. He frequently needed my help, and Kelvar started assisting him also. He very rarely asked her though, it seemed to be injuring his pride to admit he had more than he alone could handle.
Then, around the end of March, Kelvar and I had to go again to a village to defend against the forces of Lord Voldemort. It was a small village; I cannot even recall the name now. But it was heavily populated with muggle-born wizards and witches, thus prominent in Lord Voldemort's eyes. Elbereth had decided to come also. He said that he would worry about werewolves later, as innocent peoples lives were at stake. I was nervous about the battle to come, and spent most of my time with Elbereth and Kelvar, rather than getting to know the people. However, I did meet a few Unspeakables, they were here as defense also. No aurors had come, for they were not so good in the thick of battle as in one-on-one dueling and tracking.
Elbereth told me much of his experience fighting battles. He was obviously aware of my nervousness and fear. I bounced around on my talons when the air of battle reached us, for rather than fear, I felt excitement. I was ready for anything. I was ready to kill those who wanted so desperately to start a long-lasting war. And then, when early morning mist settled on us, I felt something I had only read about in The Fellowship of the Ring and The Two Towers. I felt anger, so hot as the mist was cold. It was surprising, I thought as we watched figures gliding towards us, and more human figures running, firing the first of the curses. Surprising, I thought, how angry I was, and how dizzy I was, all at the same time. I looked over to Elbereth on my side, his eyes narrowed, and his wings flexing, ready at first notice to take off. I turned, as time slowed down to the point where a second was a minute, a minute was an hour, to Kelvar. Kelvar, my beautiful sister, as majestic as ever, trembling from her beak to her red and silver plumage. This would be her first fight in which one got bloodied, the worst she had done was distract a werewolf for Elbereth to slay it.
Then time speeded again, and suddenly all the Death Eaters were swarming around us, and I was up in the air and diving on all who were open for a strike. I took out many eyes, and a few times dove into a rib cage to take out a heart. But that was rare. Then the main strike force came.
Several dementors glided towards us, and Elbereth and I flew into the air in unison, side by side. I had no idea where to strike, so I aimed for the hood. As my talons struck fabric that was not fabric, I clenched them as tight as I could.
"O Elbereth, Gilthoniel!" I cried, shouting the first thing that came into my head, to keep my mind on the battle. I kept flying straight ahead, and suddenly I shot forward as the cloak came loose, and the dementor dissolved into mist, before anyone could see its face. Elbereth was imitating my motions a split second slower, on a second dementor. Together we downed several, and none got a strike at the humans.
The Death Eaters and our defense force were having a hard time of it. Our defence force was crowded in, so few spells that could kill were released. The Death Eater's main force was mainly on defense, so they were unable to fire the Killing Curse, that being the favorite of Death Eaters. I was unable to do anything about it, so I struck hard at the eyes of several, putting them out of action. Once we had gained the advantage in numbers, and the Death Eater's realised it, they Dissaprated away, carrying the unconscious forms of wounded companions. Heartless as they were, they still carried the bodies of companions in need of help. Or perhaps they feared the wrath of Voldemort if they did not try to keep each other alive.
As I watched the last of them Dissaprate away, I felt my wings falling limply to my sides, and I fluttering down to the ground. Elbereth and Kelvar were at my side instantly.
"What is wrong, Fawkes? Are you hurt?" Elbereth asked, concern in his eyes.
"No.... Why, Elbereth? Why must wars such as this raze the world, and what happened to the people who start it? I asked him, though talking more to myself.
"What is it that makes them do this?" Elbereth looked away, thinking. But Kelvar answered me.
"Many of them were mistreated in childhood, and developed a grudge against a certain kind of people, muggles, usually, in the case of wizards. This grudge sets them apart from others, and they feel lonely or depressed. Then they start to feel anger towards those who neglected them when they used to be friends, who neglected them because they were starting to radiate evil. Then, slowly, their anger turns into anger against all things, alive and non-living. I do not know how I know this. I just do." Elbereth, who had turned back to listen, nodded his approval. I stared at the ground. Kelvar followed my gaze, feeling the same as I was, perhaps even worse. She was handling her feelings better than I, thinking them over rather than brooding on them. Elbereth stayed with us for a bit, then hurried off to a mediwizard who had Apparated onto the battlefield. He looked like he was asking for something. I knew he was asking for a potion that would put us to sleep, to shake off the prospect of taking lives and changing the future. The mediwizard pulled a small vial from his cloak and tucked it inside Elbereth's wing, telling him something about the vial. He carried it over to us and explained.
"It is a potion for sleep, though it cannot take the dreams out of your mind, and you will be surely be visited in the night. It is very potent, and will put you out for several hours, though there is not much. Drink it now." He laid a dish in front of us, where he got it from, I do not know. Holding the vial awkwardly with one talon, he pulled the cork out with his beak, and poured the contents onto the dish. I stood up on wobbly legs, and drank what seemed to be half the amount. I slowly, sluggishly, flew over to a soft looking patch of grass; what seemed the only green one among a field of blood-coloured grass. As
I toppled onto the grass, I could feel myself losing consciousness and falling into slumber.
I awoke feeling much better, though dizzy, and I stood up. Kelvar was still asleep next to me. I did not feel much up to flying, so I waddled over to where the mediwizards were tending to several wounds and curses that had not been taken off. As I looked to where the bodies of the dead Death Eaters were, I realised just how small the attack had been. Only four Death Eaters had been killed, the rest only wounded, and only seven of us were dead. Elbereth had been busy helping the mediwizards clean up, and he had not had a chance to wash himself. I could tell, just looking at him, that he had been our most valuable ally. I was sure that if he had not been there, we would have lost that battle. I took his place to give him a chance to wash and preen his feathers. I felt dizzy the entire day, and was glad of work to do, for otherwise I would have felt lost.
Elbereth, Kelvar, and I flew back, not having the same powers of Apparition as wizards. We spoke little, and Elbereth respected our silence, for he knew of our plight. He must have felt it before, as everyone has a first battle, if they have any at all.
When we returned to Hogwarts, Elbereth departed immediately for the forest, leaving Kelvar and I to report to Albus. We did not see anyone on our way to his office, and for that I was thankful, and I knew Kelvar felt the same. We entered Albus's office, and he turned to meet us.
"Welcome home," he said quietly. "You have had a tiring experience."
"I think that is an understatement," Kelvar said with the first hint of a laugh in her voice that I had heard in almost a week. I was too tired to care.
"I think that since the battle went so well, you should go to your nests to sleep. I have asked the students to leave you for a bit of quiet, until you are ready." I nodded once, turned, and slowly flew through the door that I had left open. I heard it click behind me and knew that Kelvar was following.
We settled down in our nests, and slept for hours. I would not be surprised if I had slept for a twenty-four hours, but I never asked anyone, and no one told me whether I had or had not.
I awoke on the full moon. As soon as I was refreshed and ready to go, I flew down to the Forbidden Forest to help Elbereth with the werewolves. I discovered that he, too was asleep, and so I set off alone. I was only able to find three, and dispose of two, but the third I let go. I knew that I should not do so, but it seemed that I knew him from somewhere, and the prospect of more killing, of one that I thought I knew, was more than I could handle. I herded him over to the far side of the forest, and kept him at bay, until the moon set and his transformations back began. Once he had resumed his usual appearance, I still did not recognise him, though I still thought I knew him from somewhere. Perhaps it was just a feeling.
Elbereth awoke and apologised to me for being asleep. I told him he had earned a nap.
I flew back up for a quick sleep before James, Remus, Sirius, and Peter awoke. I awoke to find their eager stares awaiting my eyes.
"Fawkes!" Remus said. "We were so worried!"
"Oh Lord, so was I," I said, looking at their anxious faces in mock sympathy. That drew a small laugh.
"What happened?" James asked. "What was it like?" I took a deep breath and thought through all the swear words I knew to reassure me. There were only two. Then I relived my story. I was surprised how much I told them, though I did not tell them how much I had felt after the battle. That was something to tell Remus and James, perhaps only Remus. While I was explaining about our manner of killing the Death Eater's - to rip their hearts out, or go for the eyes - I felt a shudder go through Peter that I did not feel through any of the others. I thought perhaps he was just a bit grossed out by the thought of the blood and gore, but it did not seem that way. I looked into his eyes, but he refused to meet mine. It was unnerving.
When I finally fell silent, I waited for reactions. I got none, not until
I prompted them.
"Will you wait the day out sitting there staring at me?" I asked patiently, just the opposite of what I was feeling.
"Oh Fawkes.... We had no idea what this was about..." James said, almost moaning in sympathy.
"Fawkes... was it really that bad?" Remus clucked anxiously. I nodded slowly.
"Worse." Kelvar had awoken.
"Oh dear," Peter said quietly. They all sounded like nesting mothers, sympathetic to the last. Sirius remained silent.
"Sirius? You seem quiet," Kelvar said, turning her golden eyes to Sirius.
"I want to kill the scum that started this war. I want to be an Auror." I turned my eyes to Sirius, just as Kelvar had done. His mouth was set in a determined frown; his eyes were narrowed and hard. He did not have the coldness in his eyes that Death Eaters have, but they were like metal, hard and set.
"You were best off staying out of this war," Kelvar said. "Men will die. People will lose friends. But that does not have to happen to any of us. We do not have to be torn from each other. Not if we stay out of this." Sirius nodded, but he was resolute.
"This is something that cannot go unattended, and if no one volunteers, then who will go? I promise, I will not let myself be killed. Besides, very few Auror's have ever died while hunting." He said this very seriously. He meant it. Suddenly I felt the same shudder that had passed through Peter earlier course through his spine once again.
"Well, we still have another two years together," James said very cheerfully, having left his melancholy behind. "At least."
After The Marauders left, I napped again, and then went down to visit Elbereth. We took baths and then I flew back up to the castle. Dinner was wonderful. It was roasted tuna and bass alongside a touch of lemongrass. The two don't normally mix well, but tonight I loved it.
As the weather got warmer, I moved my nest to the Forbidden Forest, though on the very edge. It was much better sleeping there knowing that Elbereth was nearby, and then - when she moved in - Kelvar. We spent nearly all of our time there, or with Albus and Minerva. I got to know Revjak Sachel quite well. I was not proud of the accomplishment. Elbereth and I composed poetry, as he had taken a liking to it when I lent him the poetry book that Albus had given me for Christmas. The season passed quite quickly, and I moved my nest to the edge of the lake. School was let out and for a while I heard no more of Voldemort. However, when he came back, it was in such a terrible manner that there became a tradition that said no one could say his name. I would not actually go so far as to call it a tradition, but most wizards would not say his name, so fearful were they of him.
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So, what do you think? Review please! Be sure to tell me not just whether you liked it or not, but whether the plot made sense, whether the character's were believable, how you liked the plot, if you want you can even rate it from one to ten. Thank you!
Disclamer: I own Kelvar, Revjak Sachel, Elbereth (though not the name) and whoever else is not in the Harry Potter books. The plot is also mine, though it is based on J. K. Rowling's Harry Potter books. Everything else is J. K.'s.
Siliveren penna mírel
O menel aglar elenath!
Na-chaered palan-díriel
O galadhremmin ennorath,
Fanuilos, le linnathon
Nef aear, sí nef aearon!
J. R. R. Tolkien, the Fellowship of the Ring
_______________________________________________________________________
The weeks following James' confession to me were some of the greatest in my life. Because of the increasing Dark activity, there were non-student scouts constantly patrolling the perimeter of the grounds. On occasion, Kelvar and I were sent into the Forbidden Forest, because we knew the area best, and best how to evade danger. We did not want to evade danger though, for phoenixes have an adventurous streak buried inside everything else. James, Remus, Sirius, and Peter had taught Kelvar and I how to have fun, and it involved being reckless at times. One time James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter convinced us to take them with us on our scouting trips. They were smuggled out under the invisiblily cloak on a Saturday evening. It was quite an event.
"Hmmm, so this is what the interior of the Forbidden Forest looks like, hmmm?" Sirius stated, surveying the lands. "Oh dear, we should have brought Remus. Full moon tonight, hmmm?" he said with a sidelong glance at me. "Well, lets get started." James, who could almost fully understand me, now, muttered something about Sirius being a bee.
"So, are we going to split up?" Remus asked me. "It seems logical."
"Of course," I said. "Who is going with who, and how many in each group?" I asked the boys.
"Hmmm... since there are only two of us here who know this forest, and there are six of us, we will go in threes, one navigator among each group," James and Sirius responded, parts of their speech in unison, others off beat. "Nominate the pickers for each group," Sirius said. Everyone nominated James and Sirius, even themselves, who each voted for the other one. James stood formally in the center of our little group and bowed once, twice, thrice, while Sirius stood by and pretended to blush. Peter fake-punched James in the stomach and Remus patted Sirius sympathetically. Kelvar and I took wing and circled the air 'till Remus and Sirius got that we were impatient.
"Hmmm... I want Kelvar for my navigator," Sirius said, surveying the group. That left me with James, which went without saying.
"I'll take Remus," James said, it being his turn to pick first.
"Poor Peter..." Remus said. "Always last to get picked."
"Poor Peter? Poor Sirius is more like it! I have to live with that doofus?" Peter accepted this without shame, indeed, stuck his chest out as though he had been paid a great compliment. Kelvar circled the boys, impatient to set off.
"Ahem, one more thing, if you get into trouble, send up red sparks," James said, serious again. I led James and Remus into the woods, my homeland. Homeland? One could not call the Forbidden Forest a home. The term 'home' implies a place that you love, a place where you live and enjoy. Home? No. House? Maybe. Haven? Perhaps it was safer than other places, but there were many better places to stay.
Remus was impatient for action. He bounced around, jumping here and there. I finally told him to climb a tree, and lifted him to the first branch of one. He eagerly jumped up to the top branches and yelled down that he was mad at me for being a phoenix, thus bird, and him being a human, restrained to the ground. Then he nearly fell out.
I flew up to him in haste, wondering what could have frightened him so much. I landed next to him, and asked him anxiously what had transpired.
"By Salazar's wand, a phoenix, or it looked like one, twice your size, black as midnight." He was panting, and I stared at him.
"Black?" I asked
"As the space behind a nebula."
"Remus, get out of here."
"What? Why?" He asked, clearly puzzled.
"That was a Phoenix, you judged right, but a there are only one in one-thousand Black phoenixes born to a female. They live extraordinary long lifetimes, even for a phoenix, cannot learn any language but their own, and are deadly to werewolves. I could list their characteristics for an hour or more, but get out of here!" I grabbed his arm and flew him down to James, where Remus gave a short explanation and dashed away, James at his heels. I had no idea what I was going to do. Perhaps go up and talk? About what? Perhaps the best idea was to go report to Dumbledore. Our scouting job was not finished, though. Suddenly, I had an idea, something to do rather than sitting on a tree branch. I hurtled down at breakneck speed and flew in the general direction that James and Remus had run in. As I just barely skimmed the top of their heads, I spoke one word: 'Dumbledore.'
I had to get back fast, and I thought of doing a flip to get me turned around faster, but decided against it. I had never done a barrel roll or a flip in the air, and wanted to keep it that way. I turned sharply, expecting to see the Black phoenix looming up in front of me, but I saw no one. I looked for the tallest tree there was in the forest, and found one tall enough to suit my needs. I perched, not on the uppermost branches, but the ones hightest that would support a Black phoenix. I puffed out my chest, held my tail, longer than most, high in the air, hoping against hope that I was not committing suicide. I let a great warning call go out, to tell the other phoenix that there was another occupant who claimed dominance, and that this one had human allies. I heard nothing in response. I swiveled my head around to see if perhaps the other one was there... and saw nothing. I cocked my head to the side. Something was wrong. I turned to the other side, and suddenly found myself rolling across the tree branch curled up. The phoenix had hurtled straight for me as soon as I turned my head to the side. I straightened myself, and stood staring up into the eyes of a majestic creature. I checked his magical aurora, and much to my surprise there was no evil in it. So I stared back at him, having no fear of what might come to me, now that I knew he was not evil. My thoughts of good and evil were interrupted by the Black's first words. It seemed to me that if someone had put our words onto a sheet of paper as music, his part would have been played by the bass, and mine by the viola.
"You have no friends here, they have not arrived yet." So he knew that I had sent Remus and James for Albus. "I am king of this forest. In your absence I have taken over."
"Do you serve the Dark Ones?" saying their name as a phoenix would refer to them, and knowing the answer already. He looked at me, as though trying to decide whether to answer, or whether I was stupid and not worth his time. I waited calmly.
"No, the Dark Ones have tried to overpower me several times. They will try many more. They will not succeed." He spoke this as a simple statement, rather as when a feather is dropped in flight, it falls to the ground. It was a fact, not something that he hoped or thought. For that matter, everything that he had said so far had been a fact. Well, it proved he was honest.
"You are a more noble phoenix than I have seen. My name is Fawkes," I said, deciding to trust him with my name.
He looked at me and cocked his head. "If you would trust a Black with your name, and one that just nearly killed you, I would say that you are also noble. Did you have rule over this forest before I came here?"
"Indeed."
"Come then, show me the east edges of the forest. I am not familiar with the east. 'Tis a dangerous place." I considered. The east was the side closest to Hogwarts castle, and I assumed that I could get the Black introduced to Albus easier there. I nodded my agreement.
"Then let us set off."
I had had the most experience with the east side, so thus it was not hard to show the Black around, and warn him of what to beware of. As I waited for Albus, I thought that the Black was good company, though he spoke solemnly and rarely. Soon I saw Albus walking calmly through the trees.
"King," I said, not yet knowing his name, "this is Albus Dumbledore. A friend of mine, and, though a human, he shows no claim of dominance over the Birds," I said referring to phoenixes as we do occasionally. The Black nodded his great head, and Albus bowed, when he reached us.
"May your nestlings always be happy," he said, in the Language of the Phoenix. He did not sing nearly as well as James, though. "May I ask your name?" I averted my eyes for a split second, as it was very impolite to ask one's name, before they had offered it.
The Black saw it, and realised that I had not told Albus about this custom, nor even prepared for this encounter at all. He learns a great deal from your every move, I thought in amazement, for I had never seen anyone do it as well as him. "Elbereth," he said. Albus inhaled very quickly, and I turned to look at him.
"Albus? Are you alright?" He nodded, calm again.
"Elbereth is the name of an elf, an almost sacred character in the Lord of the Rings muggle series. It was my favorite childhood series, though it was written by muggles." Elbereth smiled slightly, as well as a phoenix can.
"I know the feeling."
Things went fine after that. Albus invited the huge Black phoenix to stay at Hogwarts, and he declined with majestic politeness. When it was about time for dinner, I realised that I had completely forgotten about Sirius, Peter, and Kelvar. Albus and I were making our good-byes anyhow, and I hurtled up to the castle, muttering a hurried apology to Albus as I sped past him. To my very great relief, James, Remus, Sirius, and Peter were all sitting at the Gryfindor table. Kelvar was with Lily and Cecilia. I flew up to the High Table to tell the staff where Albus was. I then flew back down to the boys.
"Fawkes, what was that thing?" Peter asked, evidently having heard the stories, just not been able to believe them, or hadn't gotten out of Remus and James what it was.
"It was a Black phoenix. Have you read about them?" James, Remus, and Peter shook their heads, but Sirius paused.
"Haven't we, though? In Professor Binns class, he was noting how phoenixes used to get involved in goblin affairs, and he brought up the fact that, more often than not, Black phoenixes sided with the goblins. Then he got into them remember? Wanted us to write a paper on them, and then realised that there probably wasn't enough stuff in the library on them to make a two inch long paper." James was nodding his head, but Remus and Peter still didn't remember. "Ok, well, we did, so there," Sirius said, looking exasperatedly in between Peter and Remus.
"What is this about Black phoenixes being a deadly peril to werewolves?" Remus wanted to know.
"The magical makeup of a Black phoenix automatically triggers the werewolf transformation, if the werewolf is around for too long. The werewolf will then go crazy, something like rabies. It will storm around in a rage, and then fall to the ground unable to move because of the thirst they neglected during their rampage. However, you do know about the Wolfsbane potion being researched? From it's makeup, it sounds as if a werewolf could take this potion and be perfectly safe from a Black phoenix," I said, knowing that this news would come as a delight to Remus.
The dinner was quite enjoyable after that, and I went up to my nest in the Gryffindor common room, ready for a long sleep. I reflected then, on Elbereth, and thought that I should perhaps read this 'Lord of the Rings.'
Breakfast the next morning was excellent, better even, than most. I got fresh tuna and rainbow fish. The meal went by quickly.
I flew down to the Forbidden Forest, to notify Elbereth of Remus's predicament. He didn't look like he had gotten much sleep, and I did not know how angry a Black phoenix could get, so I left with all haste. I went to the Library with James and Remus to finish up a paper on Animagi. While they were looking up books on Animagi transformations, I went hunting for books on Black phoenixes. I found nothing.
The day passed just as quickly as breakfast had, after I came back from the library.
The next few weeks, leading up to Thanksgiving were great fun. The Marauder's were not nearly as active as I had heard that they were in recent years. After that first prank on the train, not much else was pulled, until Christmas. Elbereth and I got to know each other very well, though he never did speak much. I looked up 'The Hobbit' among Albus's personal library, and started the book. I was up long hours, teaching myself to read the English language fully enough to understand J. R. R. Tolkein's queer language. After I finished that, I started on The Fellowship of the Ring. When I came to the Elvish poem* with Elbereth's name I spent a long time learning how to say the words in my native language, and then memorizing it. Albus was also busy. He was contending with the uprising Dark Arts, and negotiating with Elbereth. Elbereth was already our patrol group, and he was effective, since he kept the werewolves out of the forest, or simply killed them. When he did make them go on a rampage, he would swoop down and break their neck. Once, on a particularly large one, I had to help.
Around Thanksgiving, Kelvar and I were sent to a village on the outskirts of London. That village was supposedly targeted for the first real raid of the Dark forces. The only reason Kelvar and I were there, was because we would be more effective in fighting Dementors than humans. Once Lord Voldemort heard that his dementor's would no longer be as effective because there were several phoenixes there, he left off the attack. Kelvar and I were stationed there as if we were in the army, for about a month. "It will be a classroom for the human world, one for someone of all ages," Albus had said when trying to convince me to go.
"But I do not like the curriculum," I retorted. I detest war with every fiber in my body.
When Kelvar and I returned, we found that there had been some slight changes to Hogwarts castle. There was now a password for every door, including the front doors. The castle had been searched top to bottom, and a few more secret passageways were blocked off, and no longer secret. That was just about all, though except that fewer students were allowed out after dark, and any one found roaming the castle at night were given detention and had thirty points taken from their house. James and Sirius were still up and about at night, they just knew how to stay hidden. Occasionally Remus and Peter would come too, but they had to work harder for their O. W. L.'s, which would come in March. I had to reread much of The Fellowship of the Ring in order to start on The Two Towers, as I had lost my place in my month away from home, in a place where I was on my guard at all times. Albus seemed very busy then, and we rarely spoke. Christmas came quickly.
I had done nothing to prepare for Christmas, it seemed that the time had passed so quickly. Christmas Day came all to soon. Even had I wanted to, I could not have gotten anyone any sort of gift, as I had no money. Phoenixes have no need for money. I could go out and fetch them a fish or something, but I doubt anyone but Kelvar would like that. Remus and James, however, had noticed how much time I spent with my beak inside The Two Towers, and had gone through much trouble with their parents to get me a copy of all four books. I thanked them profoundly, and was unable to set my voice back on tune for quite a while.
Albus had gotten me a poetry book, with all sorts of poems, large and small. I enjoyed it immensely. Kelvar and I went fishing for each other. I brought her a bass, knowing it was her favorite. She dropped a rainbow fish at my talons, and had it all cleaned up for me.
I spent much of my time with Elbereth now, helping him clear the forest. It was a marvel to work with him, it seemed that he could have taken on a basilisk if he wanted. A few days after Christmas, he did. He spotted the giant snake slithering through a pile of leaves.
"Listen. I am going to go over to that tree, and await your signal," he pointed to a tree almost directly opposite us. "You will go down and draw the basilisks head in the opposite direction, and do not drop eye contact with it! You will signal me, and I shall hurtle down like the lightning of Zeus." This seemed to be a ritual of his. Before tackling an enemy, he would give an example as to what he would be like, what he would imitate. What is your signal?" I thought a moment and then demonstrated, bending my wings inward so that my feathers pointed at my crest. "Good," he said, and then flew off to the tree he had pointed to. I took a deep breath, and took wing. I flew down to where the basilisk had slithered. I let out a hunting cry, drawing its attention. He reared up and I circled his head. I drew the back of his neck away, and then quickly gave the signal. True to his word, Elbereth flew straight out, almost a second after I had given the signal. Talons leading he smashed into the basilisk's neck, and as I pulled up I could see him clenching and unclenching his talons. In a few seconds the basilisk lay dead. I watched the thing sway, in its death throes, and then fall with a dead thump to the ground. I knew Elbereth did not take pleasure in this, to him it was simply a necessity. I flew over to where he had settled himself on a rock in a stream, to wash off.
"Elbereth," I said as I helped him to wash his talons, and indeed, his legs. "When you get out there, on the battlefield, are you really yourself? Or does some demon inhabit you, some god or goddess inhabit you, simply using you for their purposes?"
Elbereth considered for a long time before answering. "I think that when one is on a battlefield, they know who they are fighting for, and what the reality is, that they are taking lives, and ruining spirits. But I do not know that one is really in control of his actions. In the heat of battle, with magic and adrenaline flowing in you if you are a wizard, and with adrenaline flowing in you if you are a muggle, you do not quite have control. So then, a God who is siding with you inhabits you. However, I think that whether you fight with honor, or whether just to win, is determined by you. Thus you can choose the God who controls your body, but he still controls you."
I considered these words for a long time. Even though it was the dead of winter, I stood in the deepest part of the stream and cleaned myself as I had not done in several weeks. I cleaned and thought. I remembered the words of the poem; A Elbereth, Gilthoniel, and I knew then that Elbereth had chosen a god who was good, honorable, and an excellent fighter. I thought about the battle with the basilisk, and wondered which god I had chosen.
The next few days were dreary and cold. Remus endured another transformation during those days. I spent all my time in the castle, except once when I ventured out to invite Elbereth in. He declined. I went to Kelvar's nest (for she always did make better nests than I did) and dropped my beak into the Two Towers. So far I did not like it nearly as much as The Fellowship of the Ring, but it was still good. Elbereth's speech after the battle with the basilisk stayed in my mind. I tried to decide which god or goddess Aragorn had chosen, or which small Sam Gamgee had picked. For one might have been better in battle than the other, but each was still forced to enter combat.
After the cold had passed, I spent all my time either with The Marauders or with Elbereth and Kelvar, who had become good friends also.
"You know, I want to take a look at the bottom of that lake," James said one day, while we were walking around the lake with our toast. "I really want to look at the bottom of that lake."
"What d'you expect to find down there?" Peter asked with a snigger.
"I dunno, maybe some mermaids. Grindylows. Who knows, maybe even the giant squid?" James responded, choosing to ignore Peter's snigger.
"James, James. Don't you ever pay attention in class?" Sirius said shaking his head in mock sympathy. "Professor Sachel was telling us about underwater trips just a few weeks ago. He said that your best chance would be human transfiguration, or the Bubble Head Charm."
"Thanks, Sirius!" James said, and with out another word cast a warming spell on himself, dove into the water, and transfigured himself into a dolphin. Sirius, Remus, and Peter gaped after him. Sirius shook his head again.
"Bad form. He had to do it in broad daylight! And on the near side of the lake, too. I fear the man has gone completely out of his wits." Peter and Remus nodded.
"So we just have to go in and help him!" Remus said, his face breaking into a smile.
"Of course! Would we leave a friend, mad or not, in the lake alone? Absolutely not!" Peter said. I stared at the three of them, and laughed softly. "What?" Peter asked me.
"How am I going to make it through?" I asked them. They stared at me.
"Surely you weren't expecting to go in with us?" Remus asked.
"Come, would you leave me on the shores alone?" I asked.
" Well, no, but..."
"We wouldn't normally but..."
"Oh come on, just get it out in the open!" Sirius said. "Fawkes, James does not normally do things like that. We would like to find out what he is up to. And we were reading the other day about how phoenixes can't swim."
"Well, has it ever been proven?" I asked.
"Yes."
"Then consider me out of the ordinary."
"Er... Fawkes, have you ever tried to swim?"
"Well, I don't believe so, but I am sure I can manage."
"Fawkes, stand to sense-"
"As you are doing?" I asked pointedly. Sirius and Remus grinned.
"Ok, you win," Remus said, grinning broadly. Sirius and Peter nodded solemnly. Remus and Sirius drew their wands, and cast the spells on me, then on each other, while Peter fumbled with his. After a few moments, we were ready to go. We walked around to where we were just out of sight of the castle. Remus and Sirius went first, each diving into the lake effortlessly and perfectly in unison, looking as though they had been born to the water. Peter and I followed, being slower and having less experience with the water. I took to the air, and then hurtled down in a fine dive, but for the fact that I did not pull up when I should have normally, as so to avoid the ground. As I hit the water, I knew immediately that I could live in this water. It was like flying, only in slow motion, as the liquid slowed your motions down. The water was more soothing than the air, and I knew that in this place I would not fall. The normal rules did not apply in the water. Oh it was bliss... I have been told what the Imperius Curse feels like, and I think the water was just the same.
As soon as I had mastered slow-motion flying, I flew over to where Sirius, Remus, and Peter were hovering. Sirius nodded to us and we set off looking for James. Suddenly Remus spun around, and pulled upright. He pointed to a human figure, swimming in the opposite direction. We hurtled off, plummeting into the deep.
We soon caught up to James, who was looking at a group of grindylows, though he kept his distance. He was fingering his wand, as though wondering if he would need it. Then he heard us coming, and spun around. When he realised who we were, he waved to us. He tried to speak, and we could just barely understand him.
"Merpeople!" he bubbled. "Beyond that horde..." He gestured towards the grindylows. The four of them grinned at each other, and drew their wands. I watched in amazement.
"You are not thinking of attacking them, are you?" I sang anxiously. "I should hope not..." I said, in a quieter voice.
"Oh, no, just getting past them," Remus said mischievously. "Fawkes, you can participate if you want, but if you would like, you can just circle around them."
"I think that I will go with you. There is safety in numbers," I said, not believing my own words, not with these four.
Thus it was, that a few minutes later, we could be seen nursing small wounds, and setting off to see the merpeople - whoever they were.
The merpeople turned out to be rather . . . overvalued, shall I say? They seemed to me rather like humans, but for their legs, which were not legs at all, but fins. James and Sirius had fun teasing their odd ways, and I spent my time learning better how to fly in this water. After about fifteen minutes watching the merpeople, we set off back towards the shore. Remus claimed he saw the giant squid, and it was not until Peter said he had too that I believed it.
I begged the others to let me stay in for a while, and they agreed. Sirius said he'd come; he wanted a glimpse of the giant squid too. So we set off, and Sirius got his wish.
We were swimming the perimeter of the lake when I nudged Sirius and motioned with my wing towards the center. It was the giant squid. Sirius's eyes went wide and he motioned towards the giant squid, indicating that we should swim to it. We hurtled off, Sirius in the lead. We got as close as we could before the squid turned and shot off into the darkness. Sirius looked like he had wanted a closer look. I was glad we had only gotten as far as we had.
I very rarely went into the lake again, though I started taking frequent baths in a tub. Kelvar was amazed at me. I told her what happened, and she tried it herself, though she didn't like it nearly as much as I did, though she still enjoyed it.
The months of the winter passed in a blur, as before. I cannot understand why time was flying so fast, escaping my grip.
It was late March before time slowed again. I had done very little the past months, other than talk with my friends. Elbereth had his talons full with werewolves; they were filling the forest faster than he had imagined they could. He frequently needed my help, and Kelvar started assisting him also. He very rarely asked her though, it seemed to be injuring his pride to admit he had more than he alone could handle.
Then, around the end of March, Kelvar and I had to go again to a village to defend against the forces of Lord Voldemort. It was a small village; I cannot even recall the name now. But it was heavily populated with muggle-born wizards and witches, thus prominent in Lord Voldemort's eyes. Elbereth had decided to come also. He said that he would worry about werewolves later, as innocent peoples lives were at stake. I was nervous about the battle to come, and spent most of my time with Elbereth and Kelvar, rather than getting to know the people. However, I did meet a few Unspeakables, they were here as defense also. No aurors had come, for they were not so good in the thick of battle as in one-on-one dueling and tracking.
Elbereth told me much of his experience fighting battles. He was obviously aware of my nervousness and fear. I bounced around on my talons when the air of battle reached us, for rather than fear, I felt excitement. I was ready for anything. I was ready to kill those who wanted so desperately to start a long-lasting war. And then, when early morning mist settled on us, I felt something I had only read about in The Fellowship of the Ring and The Two Towers. I felt anger, so hot as the mist was cold. It was surprising, I thought as we watched figures gliding towards us, and more human figures running, firing the first of the curses. Surprising, I thought, how angry I was, and how dizzy I was, all at the same time. I looked over to Elbereth on my side, his eyes narrowed, and his wings flexing, ready at first notice to take off. I turned, as time slowed down to the point where a second was a minute, a minute was an hour, to Kelvar. Kelvar, my beautiful sister, as majestic as ever, trembling from her beak to her red and silver plumage. This would be her first fight in which one got bloodied, the worst she had done was distract a werewolf for Elbereth to slay it.
Then time speeded again, and suddenly all the Death Eaters were swarming around us, and I was up in the air and diving on all who were open for a strike. I took out many eyes, and a few times dove into a rib cage to take out a heart. But that was rare. Then the main strike force came.
Several dementors glided towards us, and Elbereth and I flew into the air in unison, side by side. I had no idea where to strike, so I aimed for the hood. As my talons struck fabric that was not fabric, I clenched them as tight as I could.
"O Elbereth, Gilthoniel!" I cried, shouting the first thing that came into my head, to keep my mind on the battle. I kept flying straight ahead, and suddenly I shot forward as the cloak came loose, and the dementor dissolved into mist, before anyone could see its face. Elbereth was imitating my motions a split second slower, on a second dementor. Together we downed several, and none got a strike at the humans.
The Death Eaters and our defense force were having a hard time of it. Our defence force was crowded in, so few spells that could kill were released. The Death Eater's main force was mainly on defense, so they were unable to fire the Killing Curse, that being the favorite of Death Eaters. I was unable to do anything about it, so I struck hard at the eyes of several, putting them out of action. Once we had gained the advantage in numbers, and the Death Eater's realised it, they Dissaprated away, carrying the unconscious forms of wounded companions. Heartless as they were, they still carried the bodies of companions in need of help. Or perhaps they feared the wrath of Voldemort if they did not try to keep each other alive.
As I watched the last of them Dissaprate away, I felt my wings falling limply to my sides, and I fluttering down to the ground. Elbereth and Kelvar were at my side instantly.
"What is wrong, Fawkes? Are you hurt?" Elbereth asked, concern in his eyes.
"No.... Why, Elbereth? Why must wars such as this raze the world, and what happened to the people who start it? I asked him, though talking more to myself.
"What is it that makes them do this?" Elbereth looked away, thinking. But Kelvar answered me.
"Many of them were mistreated in childhood, and developed a grudge against a certain kind of people, muggles, usually, in the case of wizards. This grudge sets them apart from others, and they feel lonely or depressed. Then they start to feel anger towards those who neglected them when they used to be friends, who neglected them because they were starting to radiate evil. Then, slowly, their anger turns into anger against all things, alive and non-living. I do not know how I know this. I just do." Elbereth, who had turned back to listen, nodded his approval. I stared at the ground. Kelvar followed my gaze, feeling the same as I was, perhaps even worse. She was handling her feelings better than I, thinking them over rather than brooding on them. Elbereth stayed with us for a bit, then hurried off to a mediwizard who had Apparated onto the battlefield. He looked like he was asking for something. I knew he was asking for a potion that would put us to sleep, to shake off the prospect of taking lives and changing the future. The mediwizard pulled a small vial from his cloak and tucked it inside Elbereth's wing, telling him something about the vial. He carried it over to us and explained.
"It is a potion for sleep, though it cannot take the dreams out of your mind, and you will be surely be visited in the night. It is very potent, and will put you out for several hours, though there is not much. Drink it now." He laid a dish in front of us, where he got it from, I do not know. Holding the vial awkwardly with one talon, he pulled the cork out with his beak, and poured the contents onto the dish. I stood up on wobbly legs, and drank what seemed to be half the amount. I slowly, sluggishly, flew over to a soft looking patch of grass; what seemed the only green one among a field of blood-coloured grass. As
I toppled onto the grass, I could feel myself losing consciousness and falling into slumber.
I awoke feeling much better, though dizzy, and I stood up. Kelvar was still asleep next to me. I did not feel much up to flying, so I waddled over to where the mediwizards were tending to several wounds and curses that had not been taken off. As I looked to where the bodies of the dead Death Eaters were, I realised just how small the attack had been. Only four Death Eaters had been killed, the rest only wounded, and only seven of us were dead. Elbereth had been busy helping the mediwizards clean up, and he had not had a chance to wash himself. I could tell, just looking at him, that he had been our most valuable ally. I was sure that if he had not been there, we would have lost that battle. I took his place to give him a chance to wash and preen his feathers. I felt dizzy the entire day, and was glad of work to do, for otherwise I would have felt lost.
Elbereth, Kelvar, and I flew back, not having the same powers of Apparition as wizards. We spoke little, and Elbereth respected our silence, for he knew of our plight. He must have felt it before, as everyone has a first battle, if they have any at all.
When we returned to Hogwarts, Elbereth departed immediately for the forest, leaving Kelvar and I to report to Albus. We did not see anyone on our way to his office, and for that I was thankful, and I knew Kelvar felt the same. We entered Albus's office, and he turned to meet us.
"Welcome home," he said quietly. "You have had a tiring experience."
"I think that is an understatement," Kelvar said with the first hint of a laugh in her voice that I had heard in almost a week. I was too tired to care.
"I think that since the battle went so well, you should go to your nests to sleep. I have asked the students to leave you for a bit of quiet, until you are ready." I nodded once, turned, and slowly flew through the door that I had left open. I heard it click behind me and knew that Kelvar was following.
We settled down in our nests, and slept for hours. I would not be surprised if I had slept for a twenty-four hours, but I never asked anyone, and no one told me whether I had or had not.
I awoke on the full moon. As soon as I was refreshed and ready to go, I flew down to the Forbidden Forest to help Elbereth with the werewolves. I discovered that he, too was asleep, and so I set off alone. I was only able to find three, and dispose of two, but the third I let go. I knew that I should not do so, but it seemed that I knew him from somewhere, and the prospect of more killing, of one that I thought I knew, was more than I could handle. I herded him over to the far side of the forest, and kept him at bay, until the moon set and his transformations back began. Once he had resumed his usual appearance, I still did not recognise him, though I still thought I knew him from somewhere. Perhaps it was just a feeling.
Elbereth awoke and apologised to me for being asleep. I told him he had earned a nap.
I flew back up for a quick sleep before James, Remus, Sirius, and Peter awoke. I awoke to find their eager stares awaiting my eyes.
"Fawkes!" Remus said. "We were so worried!"
"Oh Lord, so was I," I said, looking at their anxious faces in mock sympathy. That drew a small laugh.
"What happened?" James asked. "What was it like?" I took a deep breath and thought through all the swear words I knew to reassure me. There were only two. Then I relived my story. I was surprised how much I told them, though I did not tell them how much I had felt after the battle. That was something to tell Remus and James, perhaps only Remus. While I was explaining about our manner of killing the Death Eater's - to rip their hearts out, or go for the eyes - I felt a shudder go through Peter that I did not feel through any of the others. I thought perhaps he was just a bit grossed out by the thought of the blood and gore, but it did not seem that way. I looked into his eyes, but he refused to meet mine. It was unnerving.
When I finally fell silent, I waited for reactions. I got none, not until
I prompted them.
"Will you wait the day out sitting there staring at me?" I asked patiently, just the opposite of what I was feeling.
"Oh Fawkes.... We had no idea what this was about..." James said, almost moaning in sympathy.
"Fawkes... was it really that bad?" Remus clucked anxiously. I nodded slowly.
"Worse." Kelvar had awoken.
"Oh dear," Peter said quietly. They all sounded like nesting mothers, sympathetic to the last. Sirius remained silent.
"Sirius? You seem quiet," Kelvar said, turning her golden eyes to Sirius.
"I want to kill the scum that started this war. I want to be an Auror." I turned my eyes to Sirius, just as Kelvar had done. His mouth was set in a determined frown; his eyes were narrowed and hard. He did not have the coldness in his eyes that Death Eaters have, but they were like metal, hard and set.
"You were best off staying out of this war," Kelvar said. "Men will die. People will lose friends. But that does not have to happen to any of us. We do not have to be torn from each other. Not if we stay out of this." Sirius nodded, but he was resolute.
"This is something that cannot go unattended, and if no one volunteers, then who will go? I promise, I will not let myself be killed. Besides, very few Auror's have ever died while hunting." He said this very seriously. He meant it. Suddenly I felt the same shudder that had passed through Peter earlier course through his spine once again.
"Well, we still have another two years together," James said very cheerfully, having left his melancholy behind. "At least."
After The Marauders left, I napped again, and then went down to visit Elbereth. We took baths and then I flew back up to the castle. Dinner was wonderful. It was roasted tuna and bass alongside a touch of lemongrass. The two don't normally mix well, but tonight I loved it.
As the weather got warmer, I moved my nest to the Forbidden Forest, though on the very edge. It was much better sleeping there knowing that Elbereth was nearby, and then - when she moved in - Kelvar. We spent nearly all of our time there, or with Albus and Minerva. I got to know Revjak Sachel quite well. I was not proud of the accomplishment. Elbereth and I composed poetry, as he had taken a liking to it when I lent him the poetry book that Albus had given me for Christmas. The season passed quite quickly, and I moved my nest to the edge of the lake. School was let out and for a while I heard no more of Voldemort. However, when he came back, it was in such a terrible manner that there became a tradition that said no one could say his name. I would not actually go so far as to call it a tradition, but most wizards would not say his name, so fearful were they of him.
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So, what do you think? Review please! Be sure to tell me not just whether you liked it or not, but whether the plot made sense, whether the character's were believable, how you liked the plot, if you want you can even rate it from one to ten. Thank you!
Disclamer: I own Kelvar, Revjak Sachel, Elbereth (though not the name) and whoever else is not in the Harry Potter books. The plot is also mine, though it is based on J. K. Rowling's Harry Potter books. Everything else is J. K.'s.