Author's Notes: Longer chapter, yay! This one's packed with more shounen-ai (SxB and NxB sound good?) and some humor though I write much better angst. So this is my pathetic attempt at humor. Many thanks goes to my friend Yotan for giving me ideas what to write, but I don't think I presented them the way she intended. ^^::: Gomen ne, Yotan!
Disclaimer: These bishounen do not belong to me. *sobs* They belong to Takehito Koyasu *swoons* and Project Weiss and whoever owns them that I didn't list here. Speaking of which, I'm sure someone has written something similar to this (I mean there's like 2,681 Weiss fics on FF.net alone, like someone hasn't conceived this idea). I don't plagiarize fics. I didn't copy this from someone else's work, so if it looks similar, don't email me with a 'You %#^%$&%*-ing copycat' message or something.
Also, I want to thank Koyuki Aode, Kachikara, Sabacat, Kyri, Makoto Kudou, Psycho-Shounen, Rinny and Link621 for reviewing! *glomps* I really appreciate the reviews! Extra thanks for those who've reviewed twice (that really makes my day!) And a special thank you, to Koyuki Aode for the pocky! ^_^v
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Brad's Worst Reality Chapter Three
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Brad wanted to scream at the sight presented to him. He honestly did. Twelve hours of being in this body and he swore he was going to have a nervous breakdown before he got back into his own body.
They had left Masafumi's office the night before. Brad had been in a state of shock and utter despair at the news the mad scientist had presented to him.
They had arrived home and all Brad wanted to do was go to bed and wake up normal in the morning. He had headed for his bedroom, mumbling to Nagi to not let Tot out of his sight.
The last thing he needed was for Tot to kill his body or damage it beyond repair. He did not desire to return to a dysfunctional body.
The others had also eventually gone to bed and the night passed quickly.
Brad opened his eyes, then closed them. No, no...when he opened his eyes, he would be himself again. He sat up in the bed, opened his eyes and was met by sky blue hair falling onto his face.
He groaned, letting himself fall back onto the pillow. He didn't really want to get up. Takatori had been generous enough to give him time off until he got back in his own body.
Part of him still wanted to go to work. It would keep his mind off the current situation he was in. He smiled slightly, remembering he had some work to finish on his computer. Yes, he would definitely tackle that as soon as possible.
Eventually, he got out of the bed, mentally reminding himself to burn the blankets on his bed after this...girl's body had slept there.
He walked down the hallway towards Nagi's room. Nagi had been nice enough to offer to share his wardrobe with Brad until he got back into his own body. Briefly he wondered what the telekinetic would want in return. Some new computer software, perhaps?
He slid the doors open to Nagi's closet and glanced at the clothes. For as many clothes as the boy had, Brad wondered why he always was dressed in his school uniform.
He picked out an outfit, got dressed, then headed for the kitchen. It felt strange, wearing the teenager's clothes, but what he saw in the kitchen was even worse. Clearly, his precognition was not working well while he was in this body. He kept getting surprised.
Once again, he surpressed a scream. Tot had been smart enough to stay in Brad's clothing, rather than trying to dress more feminine. However, that did not stop her from at least attempting the feminine look.
"Ohayo!" she greeted, munching on cereal.
Brad tried his best to speak in a calm, mannerly voice, but all that came out was shouting, "WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO MY HAIR?!"
He stared in complete horror at what she'd done to him. Pigtails. She fixed his hair in pigtails! It looked completely ridiculous, and his hair wasn't even long enough for that.
"I made you pretty!" She explained.
"You...you..." that was when he noticed something else, "Where are my glasses?"
"Um..."
"Well?"
"Well you see..." she began, "I took them off, and I put them down. But when I stood up, I accidentally stepped on them."
"You put them on the floor?"
She nodded.
"You broke my glasses..."
She nodded again.
Brad refrained from throttling her. It was, after all, his body that would suffer if she did. He counted to ten...several times, then called for Schuldig. The German came almost immediately.
"Yes, Miss Brad?"
"Shut up. Where's Nagi?"
"He went to school today."
"I'm gonna kill him."
"For going to school?"
"For not keeping an eye on Tot so that THIS would not happen!" Brad pointed to his body.
Schuldig laughed, "I know. Isn't it funny?" I already took a picture for which I plan to use for blackmail. he thought.
Brad glared at him, "Keep an eye on Tot. And DON'T let her do anything stupid to my body, got it?"
"Yes, Miss Brad...which might I add, seems to be showing signs of PMS. Is it that time of the month?"
"No, shut up!"
He stormed out of the kitchen, no longer hungry for breakfast. Yes...deciding to hermit in his bedroom in front of his computer all day seemed like a plan...
Work. Not only was it a task that just had to be done, it was actually something he enjoyed. If his mind was focused on work, it was unable to be focused on other things.
It was like a mask for the American. Something he could find refuge in. All was right in the world as long as he had something to work on, whether it was cleaning or just simple paperwork.
Today, especially, he desperately needed to get away. To forget that he was in this psychotic female's body. It was working...somewhat. Sky blue hair would fall in his face as he worked, reminding him of the horror that had come upon him only yesterday.
Nagi went to school that morning, leaving himself, Schuldig, and Farfarello to look after the Schreint member. He assigned Schuldig that task, so that he could go work. He still longed to lay down, fall asleep, and wake up in his own body.
But it didn't appear that would be happening anytime soon. He clenched his fists, adding Takatori Masafumi to the list of people he would torture and kill in a most painful, miserable way as soon as he was back in his own body.
He heard a shrill shriek, that surprised even him, since it was made with his voice. He didn't know his deep voice could reach that high pitch.
Brad sighed, temporarily abandoning his computer to go find out what was going on. At the worst, Farfarello was probably showing her 'how to hurt god' and that freaked her out.
The sight he saw was not what he quite expected, and his jaw dropped in surprise...and something else he couldn't identify at the moment.
"GET AWAY FROM MY BODY!" Brad shouted at Schuldig.
Schuldig had Brad's body pressed up against the wall, wrists pinned against the wall. By the expression on Brad's face, Tot was none too happy about what the German was trying to do either.
Schuldig turned his head, to see a seething Tot -or rather, Brad Crawford- and the expression on the girl's face meant business.
"What?" Schuldig asked.
"What do you mean 'what'?? What the hell are you doing?!" Brad demanded.
"I couldn't help it. This--" he gestured at the still mortified girl in Brad's body, "Turned me on."
"Tot...turned you on?"
"NO!! Your BODY turned me on," Schuldig corrected, "Can't I just forget you two switched bodies for five minutes?"
"Molest that body when I am not in it, and you will never get anything from me again," Brad told Schuldig, "Got it?"
"But dammit, I'm horny! And you promised!"
"Promised what?"
Schuldig shook his head, "Don't EVEN say you don't REMEMBER!!"
[~*~Flashback~*~]
Brad: What would it take to make you guys do this mission with Schreint?
Schu: Hot steamy sex.
Farf: A new knife set.
Nagi: New laptop computer.
Schu: More hot steamy sex.
Brad: *shiny-glasses glare*
[~*~End Flashback~*~]
"Well that was BEFORE any of this happened!" Brad explained.
Schuldig whined, "It's still the same sexy American body!"
"Well, leave my body alone!" Brad went back into the room, slamming the door behind him.
Schuldig swore under his breath. Tot regained her composure and kicked Schuldig in the shin, before running off.
It seemed forever until Nagi got home from school. Tot had wandered around the apartment searching for a crawl space to hide in, under, or behind, finally settling for Nagi's room, next to his desk.
"Tot?"
Tot sighed, wishing to disappear, wishing to be in her own body, wishing to be back at home. So she wasn't especially pleased when Nagi found her hiding place.
"Tot," Nagi greeted.
Nagi set his backpack on the floor, next to his bed and approached her, one hand behind his back.
"I brought something for you."
"A surprise?"
He nodded, sitting on the carpeted floor. And revealed what was behind his back.
"Rabbi-chan!"
She held tightly onto the small stuffed animal rabbit, then looked up at Nagi.
"Arigato, Nagi-kun!" she leaned forward, hugging the boy, then kissed him.
Nagi pulled away almost immediately, and Tot looked at him, confused.
"Gomen ne, Tot! It just...it just felt like I was being kissed by...by Brad," he blushed.
She smiled, then laughed, which only made Nagi blush a deeper shade of red.
"I forgot," was her only explanation.
They sat in silence for a moment. Tot started to play with her bunny, while idle. Nagi however, was thinking. He'd been kissed by Tot...yet, that was Brad. And...
"No..." Nagi said gently, turning to Tot, "It's alright."
Tot stopped playing with the bunny, long enough to give Nagi a confused look.
"It's alright," he repeated, leaning in to kiss Tot.
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Author's Notes: ___ Ah, I couldn't help it. It just...fit. Yeah, yeah... *watches the BradxNagi/NagixBrad fans go wild* ¬.¬
Oh yeah, chapter four is in the works. (if you count one paragraph 'the works') But really, after this chapter...I have no idea where I'm going with this story. I smell angst but I'm trying to keep it out of this story. *smacks angst with a large blunt object*