=*=*=*=*=*=*=
"BLITZBALLERS"
-Fanfiction by RAVEgirl [RAVEgirl_669@hotmail.com]
-Final Fantasy X, blitzball, and all characters are (c) Squaresoft
=*=*=*=*=*=*=
~Ch. 13: GOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAL!!!!!
{In the maester's luxury box seat}
(They're watching the tournament)
Seymour: (smirk) That large man with the sticking up hair [he's talking about Wakka], he is guardian to Lady Yuna, is he not? Does it appear as if he is . . . (chuckle) . . . LOSING on PURPOSE?
Mika: I suppose so. Why do you ask?
Seymour: No reason. (smirks bigger) Please, Lord Mika, excuse me for one moment.
(Seymour nodded to his bodyguards)
(They all got up and left the stadium)
=*=
{Somewhere else in the stadium -- less luxurious seats}
(Auron is leaning on the wall, tapping his foot)
Auron: (mumbles to himself) Where's Jecht's kid . . . ?
=*=
{"Jecht's kid" [Tidus], Lulu, and Kimahri were searching for Yuna around the ports of Luca}
Tidus: (cupping his hand over his mouth) YUUUUUUUNAAAAAAAAAA?!
Lulu: Stop that, that clearly won't work.
Tidus: Do you have a better idea?
Lulu: I will think of one when you stop yelling.
(An Al Bhed mechscouter robot appeared)
Kimahri: Rrrrrrrghhh. Machina. (prepares to kill it)
Tidus: I'll field this. (swung Brotherhood like an axe and connected with the robot)
(The robot fell apart)
Tidus: Dadadada-DAdadadada (singing victory music for himself)
Lulu: You're a clumsy swordsman.
Tidus: Got the job done, didn't it?
(Lulu looks at Tidus intently)
=*=
{Yuna's being held hostage by some non-blitzball-playing Al Bhed at Dock #4}
Al Bhed #1: [Don't try to escape, cutie. It will make us very mad.]
(Yuna spoke in Al Bhed!)
Yuna: [If you will not let me go, at least tell me why you have captured me.]
Al Bhed #2: [You're safer here.]
Yuna: [Will you kill me?]
Al Bhed #1: [That depends.]
Yuna: (nervously) Ohhh-h . . . .
(Maester Seymour appeared with his five bodyguards)
Seymour: (breaths in deeply) Lady Yuna, it is a pleasure to see you! (does Yevon handshake)
(Yuna's hands are tied up so she can't return the gesture)
Seymour: (to Al Bhed) Excellent. You did just as I asked and brought Lady Yuna here.
(The two Al Bhed don't understand his English)
Seymour: (sighs)(speaks loudly with hand gestures) YOU, GOOD JOB. IS OK, YES?
(The two Al Bhed smiled and nodded uncomprehendingly)
Yuna: M-Maester Seymour!! Y-you . . . ASKED them to kidnap me?
Seymour: Only because your beauty fills my heart with such joy.
Yuna: (blush!) Excuse m-me?
(Seymour put his fingers under Yuna's chin)
Seymour: I see you are too young to understand such emotions. I suspect in the near future, you will mature quite a lot. Until then -- (removes his hand from Yuna's face) -- I leave you in peace. As for your "blitzballing" friends, they shall be taken care of.
(The Al Bhed kept grinning stupidly because they don't understand what's going on)
Seymour: (gesturing to the Al Bhed) KEEP HER HERE. I WILL COME FOR HER LATER.
(As Seymour left, he put 1278654 gil in the first Al Bhed's shirt pocket. He patted the second one on the cheek.)
Al Bhed #2: [Hey some of that money is mine!]
Al Bhed #1: [Then why is it in MY pocket?]
(They argue)
Al Bhed #1: [Let's go bet this on the tournament.]
Al Bhed #2: [I get half.]
Al Bhed #1: [You can have 50 gil.]
Al Bhed #2: [You asshole!]
(They start to leave)
(Yuna coughs)
(They stop leaving)
Al Bhed #1: [Damn. One of us has to stay and watch Yuna. Um -- you!]
Al Bhed #2: [NO FAIR! I wanna watch the Psyches play!]
Al Bhed #1: [Screw this. Let's just put Yuna in that robot thing I invented.]
Yuna: [You can go. I won't try to escape.]
Al Bhed #2: [Yeah right!!]
(They pick up Yuna and put her in a robot device)
Al Bhed #1: [That is that. Let's go.]
=*=
{Tidus, Lulu, and Kimahri keep looking for Yuna}
Tidus: She should be in one of these ports -- but which one?
(Two Al Bhed exit from Port #4 beating each other up)
Lulu: Probably that one.
(They ran to Port #4)
Tidus: YUUUUUUUUUUN--UHH.
(Kimahri butted Tidus in the stomach)
Yuna: (muffled) Heeeeelp.
(They see the machina device that Yuna's imprisoned in)
Tidus: Yuna's in there? I'll get her out. (whacks at device with Brotherhood)
(It has no affect)
Lulu: (takes out Cait Sith doll)
Tidus: Hey that's cute. Can I play w--
Lulu: (shoves Tidus out of the way and casts Thunder spell at the device)
(The device was disassembled and Yuna stepped out)
Yuna: Thank you.
(Lulu inspects Yuna)
Lulu: What did they do to you?
Yuna: They didn't hurt me. They wouldn't.
Lulu: Oh, that's right.
Yuna: Can somebody please untie me?
=*=
{They ran out of the port and back into Luca}
Tidus: The match!
(They stopped to watch the blitz match on a TV screen)
=*=
{What's happening in the blitz stadium is shown on TV!}
(In the stadium)
(As an Al Bhed is passing the ball to a teammate, it accidentally falls into Wakka's hands)
Wakka: (sobs as he performs the "Good Neighbor" play yet again)
(The Al Bhed Captain accepts the ball from him, then grins and tackles him in the groin)
(The Aurochs watch as their captain doubles over with the most hilarious expression ever on his face!!!)
Announcer #2: (put his hands on his face in shock) OH MY GOD!! Ladies and gentlemen, Captain Wakka of the Besaid Aurochs has just been BLITZED IN THE BALLS!!!
(The spectators groaned at his pun)
(Wakka groaned in pain)
Botta: Ehehehehehe.
{In the press box}
Announcer #1: That was uncalled for!!
Announcer #2: Sorry, I couldn't resist makin' the joke. A hah hah.
Announcer #1: No, I mean that tackle was clearly out of line! Regulation Spira League tackles are not allowed below the belt! WHY haven't the refs called a foul?
(The game is put on hold while the referees talked)
{The referees discuss the play in secret}
Referee #1: Oh, MAN. That is clearly a personal foul.
Referee #2: Who cares? I have 2000 gil riding on the Al Bhed Psyches. Let's not call 'em out on it.
Referee #1: How would you like it if somebody kicked you? Have you no sympathy?!?!
Referee #2: Oh, fine. Can we see the video one more time?
(They replay the video of Wakka getting injured)
Referee #2: Wait, can we see that one more time? I haven't decided yet.
(They replayed the video of Wakka's injury about 5 more times)
=*=
{Back to where Tidus, Yuna, Lulu, and Kimahri were watching this on TV}
(The footage of Wakka is being replayed for the 27th time)
Tidus: I can't watch this anymore. (covers his eyes with his hands)
(Lulu watches Wakka in his pained state on the TV)
Lulu: What a clumsy idiot. If it were Chappu, he'd still be standing.
Tidus: (uncovers his eyes) Woah! Chappu must have had balls of steel.
Kimahri: Rrrrrrrr.
(On TV, the refs decided not to call a personal foul)
Yuna: Is Wakka throwing the game . . . for me?
Lulu: Oh no, I almost forgot about Wakka!!! (shot a flare into the sky with a Thunder spell)
=*=
{Back in the sphere pool}
(The game resumed)
Wakka: Owwwwww.
Jassu: Are you OK Cap'n Wakka?
Wakka: (grits his teeth) YES.
Letty: We'll destroy 'em for you, Cap'n.
Wakka: No, don't.
(Wakka suddenly saw Lulu's flare signal thing that means "Yuna is safe so you can win the game now")
Letty: Oh. (holding the ball) I guess I'll just perform the "Good Neighbor" play agai--
Wakka: (looking at flare) NO!!!!! New play, new play!!!
(Wakka signals a play)
Announcer #2: It looks like Wakka, even in his crippled state, is calling for an all out offensive!!!
(Letty passes the ball to Wakka)
(Wakka swims towards goal)
(The Aurochs try to block the Psyches)
Botta: (blocking the Al Bhed Captain) Ya better not try to kick me in the crotch, eh?
(The Al Bhed Captain kicked Botta in the face)
(Wakka swam directly into the Psyches' goalkeeper's face and drop-kicked the ball)
(The goalkeeper couldn't block it!)
Announcer #2: GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLL!!! . . . sorry, I couldn't resist that either!
(BUZZER SOUNDED -- end of the match!!!!)
(THE AUROCHS WON 1-0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Wakka: Yyyes. We did it. UHhhhh? (went into fetal position and began floating face-down in the water)
Announcer #1: Somebody better get him some medical attention . . . . NOW GET HIM OUT OF THE POOL SO WE CAN SEE THE NEXT MATCH!
Announcer #2: (jumped on the press table and is doing a grind-y victory dance) The Aurochs won!! WHOO!!! WHOO!!! TAKE THAT, AL BHED!!!!!
=*=
"BLITZBALLERS"
-Fanfiction by RAVEgirl [RAVEgirl_669@hotmail.com]
-Final Fantasy X, blitzball, and all characters are (c) Squaresoft
=*=*=*=*=*=*=
~Ch. 13: GOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAL!!!!!
{In the maester's luxury box seat}
(They're watching the tournament)
Seymour: (smirk) That large man with the sticking up hair [he's talking about Wakka], he is guardian to Lady Yuna, is he not? Does it appear as if he is . . . (chuckle) . . . LOSING on PURPOSE?
Mika: I suppose so. Why do you ask?
Seymour: No reason. (smirks bigger) Please, Lord Mika, excuse me for one moment.
(Seymour nodded to his bodyguards)
(They all got up and left the stadium)
=*=
{Somewhere else in the stadium -- less luxurious seats}
(Auron is leaning on the wall, tapping his foot)
Auron: (mumbles to himself) Where's Jecht's kid . . . ?
=*=
{"Jecht's kid" [Tidus], Lulu, and Kimahri were searching for Yuna around the ports of Luca}
Tidus: (cupping his hand over his mouth) YUUUUUUUNAAAAAAAAAA?!
Lulu: Stop that, that clearly won't work.
Tidus: Do you have a better idea?
Lulu: I will think of one when you stop yelling.
(An Al Bhed mechscouter robot appeared)
Kimahri: Rrrrrrrghhh. Machina. (prepares to kill it)
Tidus: I'll field this. (swung Brotherhood like an axe and connected with the robot)
(The robot fell apart)
Tidus: Dadadada-DAdadadada (singing victory music for himself)
Lulu: You're a clumsy swordsman.
Tidus: Got the job done, didn't it?
(Lulu looks at Tidus intently)
=*=
{Yuna's being held hostage by some non-blitzball-playing Al Bhed at Dock #4}
Al Bhed #1: [Don't try to escape, cutie. It will make us very mad.]
(Yuna spoke in Al Bhed!)
Yuna: [If you will not let me go, at least tell me why you have captured me.]
Al Bhed #2: [You're safer here.]
Yuna: [Will you kill me?]
Al Bhed #1: [That depends.]
Yuna: (nervously) Ohhh-h . . . .
(Maester Seymour appeared with his five bodyguards)
Seymour: (breaths in deeply) Lady Yuna, it is a pleasure to see you! (does Yevon handshake)
(Yuna's hands are tied up so she can't return the gesture)
Seymour: (to Al Bhed) Excellent. You did just as I asked and brought Lady Yuna here.
(The two Al Bhed don't understand his English)
Seymour: (sighs)(speaks loudly with hand gestures) YOU, GOOD JOB. IS OK, YES?
(The two Al Bhed smiled and nodded uncomprehendingly)
Yuna: M-Maester Seymour!! Y-you . . . ASKED them to kidnap me?
Seymour: Only because your beauty fills my heart with such joy.
Yuna: (blush!) Excuse m-me?
(Seymour put his fingers under Yuna's chin)
Seymour: I see you are too young to understand such emotions. I suspect in the near future, you will mature quite a lot. Until then -- (removes his hand from Yuna's face) -- I leave you in peace. As for your "blitzballing" friends, they shall be taken care of.
(The Al Bhed kept grinning stupidly because they don't understand what's going on)
Seymour: (gesturing to the Al Bhed) KEEP HER HERE. I WILL COME FOR HER LATER.
(As Seymour left, he put 1278654 gil in the first Al Bhed's shirt pocket. He patted the second one on the cheek.)
Al Bhed #2: [Hey some of that money is mine!]
Al Bhed #1: [Then why is it in MY pocket?]
(They argue)
Al Bhed #1: [Let's go bet this on the tournament.]
Al Bhed #2: [I get half.]
Al Bhed #1: [You can have 50 gil.]
Al Bhed #2: [You asshole!]
(They start to leave)
(Yuna coughs)
(They stop leaving)
Al Bhed #1: [Damn. One of us has to stay and watch Yuna. Um -- you!]
Al Bhed #2: [NO FAIR! I wanna watch the Psyches play!]
Al Bhed #1: [Screw this. Let's just put Yuna in that robot thing I invented.]
Yuna: [You can go. I won't try to escape.]
Al Bhed #2: [Yeah right!!]
(They pick up Yuna and put her in a robot device)
Al Bhed #1: [That is that. Let's go.]
=*=
{Tidus, Lulu, and Kimahri keep looking for Yuna}
Tidus: She should be in one of these ports -- but which one?
(Two Al Bhed exit from Port #4 beating each other up)
Lulu: Probably that one.
(They ran to Port #4)
Tidus: YUUUUUUUUUUN--UHH.
(Kimahri butted Tidus in the stomach)
Yuna: (muffled) Heeeeelp.
(They see the machina device that Yuna's imprisoned in)
Tidus: Yuna's in there? I'll get her out. (whacks at device with Brotherhood)
(It has no affect)
Lulu: (takes out Cait Sith doll)
Tidus: Hey that's cute. Can I play w--
Lulu: (shoves Tidus out of the way and casts Thunder spell at the device)
(The device was disassembled and Yuna stepped out)
Yuna: Thank you.
(Lulu inspects Yuna)
Lulu: What did they do to you?
Yuna: They didn't hurt me. They wouldn't.
Lulu: Oh, that's right.
Yuna: Can somebody please untie me?
=*=
{They ran out of the port and back into Luca}
Tidus: The match!
(They stopped to watch the blitz match on a TV screen)
=*=
{What's happening in the blitz stadium is shown on TV!}
(In the stadium)
(As an Al Bhed is passing the ball to a teammate, it accidentally falls into Wakka's hands)
Wakka: (sobs as he performs the "Good Neighbor" play yet again)
(The Al Bhed Captain accepts the ball from him, then grins and tackles him in the groin)
(The Aurochs watch as their captain doubles over with the most hilarious expression ever on his face!!!)
Announcer #2: (put his hands on his face in shock) OH MY GOD!! Ladies and gentlemen, Captain Wakka of the Besaid Aurochs has just been BLITZED IN THE BALLS!!!
(The spectators groaned at his pun)
(Wakka groaned in pain)
Botta: Ehehehehehe.
{In the press box}
Announcer #1: That was uncalled for!!
Announcer #2: Sorry, I couldn't resist makin' the joke. A hah hah.
Announcer #1: No, I mean that tackle was clearly out of line! Regulation Spira League tackles are not allowed below the belt! WHY haven't the refs called a foul?
(The game is put on hold while the referees talked)
{The referees discuss the play in secret}
Referee #1: Oh, MAN. That is clearly a personal foul.
Referee #2: Who cares? I have 2000 gil riding on the Al Bhed Psyches. Let's not call 'em out on it.
Referee #1: How would you like it if somebody kicked you? Have you no sympathy?!?!
Referee #2: Oh, fine. Can we see the video one more time?
(They replay the video of Wakka getting injured)
Referee #2: Wait, can we see that one more time? I haven't decided yet.
(They replayed the video of Wakka's injury about 5 more times)
=*=
{Back to where Tidus, Yuna, Lulu, and Kimahri were watching this on TV}
(The footage of Wakka is being replayed for the 27th time)
Tidus: I can't watch this anymore. (covers his eyes with his hands)
(Lulu watches Wakka in his pained state on the TV)
Lulu: What a clumsy idiot. If it were Chappu, he'd still be standing.
Tidus: (uncovers his eyes) Woah! Chappu must have had balls of steel.
Kimahri: Rrrrrrrr.
(On TV, the refs decided not to call a personal foul)
Yuna: Is Wakka throwing the game . . . for me?
Lulu: Oh no, I almost forgot about Wakka!!! (shot a flare into the sky with a Thunder spell)
=*=
{Back in the sphere pool}
(The game resumed)
Wakka: Owwwwww.
Jassu: Are you OK Cap'n Wakka?
Wakka: (grits his teeth) YES.
Letty: We'll destroy 'em for you, Cap'n.
Wakka: No, don't.
(Wakka suddenly saw Lulu's flare signal thing that means "Yuna is safe so you can win the game now")
Letty: Oh. (holding the ball) I guess I'll just perform the "Good Neighbor" play agai--
Wakka: (looking at flare) NO!!!!! New play, new play!!!
(Wakka signals a play)
Announcer #2: It looks like Wakka, even in his crippled state, is calling for an all out offensive!!!
(Letty passes the ball to Wakka)
(Wakka swims towards goal)
(The Aurochs try to block the Psyches)
Botta: (blocking the Al Bhed Captain) Ya better not try to kick me in the crotch, eh?
(The Al Bhed Captain kicked Botta in the face)
(Wakka swam directly into the Psyches' goalkeeper's face and drop-kicked the ball)
(The goalkeeper couldn't block it!)
Announcer #2: GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLL!!! . . . sorry, I couldn't resist that either!
(BUZZER SOUNDED -- end of the match!!!!)
(THE AUROCHS WON 1-0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Wakka: Yyyes. We did it. UHhhhh? (went into fetal position and began floating face-down in the water)
Announcer #1: Somebody better get him some medical attention . . . . NOW GET HIM OUT OF THE POOL SO WE CAN SEE THE NEXT MATCH!
Announcer #2: (jumped on the press table and is doing a grind-y victory dance) The Aurochs won!! WHOO!!! WHOO!!! TAKE THAT, AL BHED!!!!!
=*=