TITLE: Tell Me It's Not A Dream
AUTHOR: Jillian
FEEDBACK: Yes! Please, I beg of you! Review at the site, or if you prefer, send an e-mail to me at JILLIBEAN@aol.com
SPOILERS: Requiem, Within, Without, Per Manum…
TIMEFRAME: Season 8, before This Is Not Happening
RATING: PG
DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything, they belong to CC. Fine, fine, he can have them back I guess, as long as he does another movie. Just let me borrow em for a little while, okay?
SUMMARY: Very short, sad Scully POV on Mulder's disappearance in season eight. It's short, so I don't want to give anything else away… Please read and review!
AUTHORS NOTES: This fic was inspired by a line in my other fic, "Everybody Else", about Scully asking Mulder to prove it "wasn't a dream" that he was back, although in that story he's back from leaving on his own. This deals with the abduction, Scully still being pregnant.
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I am lying in bed as alone ever. Each and every night I hear the littlest noises that worry me, or fill me with hope of Mulder's return. Tonight is no different. I don't move, just protectively place my hand over my stomach, as if it could shield my unborn child from any harm that could come its way. I pull my covers close to me as I feel a lone tear drip down my cheek. It's like this every night, I can't take being without him--as a friend, a partner, a lover... Without him I feel empty. I feel like I've adopted his philosophy, trust no one. All the skepticism I've ever held onto has fled from me, and I truly feel I cannot trust anyone with few exceptions. I can trust Skinner, he's seen what I've seen and knows what I know. Doggett? I can't be sure, I know he watches my back, but he's so damn closed minded! It seems everyone is against me--even my gynecologist! How am I supposed to live this way? And he isn't even here to help me...
I slowly close my eyes and I feel myself drifting away into the peaceful oblivion of sleep. Moments later, I feel someone in bed next to me, stroking my hair. I turn to see his face.
"Mulder?" I whisper quietly.
"Shh." He says. "I've missed you."
"How did you get in here? Where have you been?" I ask, anxious for answers.
Stroking my arm he quietly replies. "It doesn't matter. I'm here now."
"Tell me this isn't a dream." I beg of him quietly.
He says nothing, but he moves my pajama shirt up slightly, and lays a silent, single kiss on my stomach... How could he know about the baby? Is it that obvious? I stop thinking as he crawls up the side of the bed and places a kiss on my lips. I feel so much emotion flushing over me. I close my eyes and suddenly I'm short of breath...
I open my eyes, gasping for air in an empty bedroom. No man beside my body, no lips atop my own. Just me, with tears flowing down my cheeks. This is so hard, it's too hard. I never thought the fight could get so difficult to handle, I never thought things could get so painful. I thought I could take whatever "they" dished out--but life without Mulder is more painful than any cancer or illness or abduction of my own. I just have to hold on to the hope that I can find him, that he'll come back to me...
That he'll be able to tell me it isn't a dream.