Disclaimer: I don't know what this is for. I only make it because others
do. But I do not own Harry Potter.
Note: Sorry I hadn't posted in so long. First I got hooked on Neopets, then I had so much stuff, and I got so busy, and then my favorite chat room opened again, and, well, it got pretty messed up. I can't believe how I got hooked on Neopets. Of all the things to get hooked on! Some website that deals with fake money and is like a living Monopoly! Except with battling! Okay, enough about the evil addictions to Neopets.
Dumbledore: Draco Malfoy is in the lead with 6100, Lupin is right behind with 4700, and Peeves holds the ending with negative 3200, a record in all of Jeopardy.
Peeves: grumbles
Dumbledore: Well, our Categories for today are Facts About the Malfoys, Greek Mythology, and Our Jolly British Ways. We will start with Peeves.
Draco: Facts About the Malfoys? Wait a minute-
Peeves: I'll take Our Jolly British Ways for 200, please.
Dumbledore: To Americans, Fish and Chips are actually called this.
Lupin: What are fried fish and french fries?
Dumbledore: Correct.
Lupin: I'll take British Ways for 300.
Dumbledore: This is our nation's favorite sport.
Draco: What is Quidditch?
Dumbledore: I mean the Muggle one.
Lupin: What is football? (soccer)
Dumbledore: Correct.
Lupin: I'll take British ways for 500, please.
Dumbledore: Mary Tudor was the Queen of this place.
Draco: What is Scotland?
Dumbledore: Correct.
Draco: I'll take British Ways for 600, please.
Dumbledore: Translate this sentence to American: See that bonnie wee lass!
Contestants: scratch heads
Dumbledore: What's the matter with you? You are all British!
Draco: We don't know how to translate it into American. That's the problem.
Lupin and Peeves: nod
Dumbledore: Well, it translated to 'Look at the pretty little girl' (okay, in earlier chapters, you may have gotten confused. I do not live in Britain. I was only born there. I left when I was 12 weeks old, and my parents are not British. They are Asian. My name is Scottish. Ailsa is named after Ailsa Craig.)
Contestants: Ohhhhhhhhhhhh. (to Dumbledore's answer, not mine)
Draco: British ways for 800, please.
Dumbledore: This is the hair color for most Irish people.
Draco: What is red?
Dumbledore: Correct.
Peeves: scratches heads I wonder if the Weasleys are Irish.
Lupin: Nah.
Draco: ignoring the other two I'll take British ways for 900.
Dumbledore: Scottish people enjoy drinking. They drink the most on this night and sleep in the streets.
Lupin: What is Saturday?
Dumbledore: Correct.
Peeves: snickers Well, when McGonagall meet the Headmaster to bring ickle Harry to Pivet Drive, people sure weren't drunk lying on the streets.
Draco, Lupin, and Dumbledore: stare
Peeves: Sorry, just had to say that.
Lupin: I'll take British ways for 1100, please.
Dumbledore: English people have either these two hair colors. Dark hair is Scottish, while red is Irish.
Draco: What is light brown and blonde.
Dumbledore: Correct.
Draco: Well, I sure am English, all right.
Lupin: Rowling had light hair, but she was from Scotland.
Dumbledore: Well, I said English people, not Scottish people or Irish. You get some rare hair colors occasionally.
Draco: I'll take British Ways for 1300.
Dumbledore: This Muggle British sport is more like American football than the others.
Draco: What is soccer?
Dumbledore: No.
Lupin: What is rugby?
Dumbledore: Correct.
Lupin: I'll take Greek Mythology for 100, please.
Dumbledore: This is the king of the Greek gods.
Peeves: Who is Ra?
Dumbledore: No. That is Egyptian.
Draco: Who is Zeus?
Dumbledore: Correct.
Draco: Greek Mythology for 200, please.
Dumbledore: These are the names of all 12 Gods sitting on the thrones.
Peeves: Who are Demeter, Bob, Zeus, Dionysus, Hera, Athena, Apollo, Aphrodite, Jennifer, Artemis, Hades, and Poseidon?
Dumbledore: Close, but no.
Draco: How in the world did you get Bob and Jennifer?
Peeves: shrugs
Draco: Who are Demeter, Zeus, Dionysus, Hera, Athena, Artemis, Aphrodite, Hephastus, Hades, Poseidon, and Ares?
Dumbledore: Correct.
Draco: Amazing. I thought I wouldn't get it. I'll take Greek Mythology for 400, please.
Dumbledore: This is the name of the wood nymph that got turned into a tree because Apollo wanted to marry her, but she hated him.
Draco: Who is Daphne?
Lupin: Daphne is the name of the girl on Scooby Doo!
Dumbledore: ignores Lupin's comment That's correct.
Draco: I'll take Greek Mythology for 600, please.
Dumbledore: And the answer is: Daily Double!
Draco: I'll wager 2000.
Dumbledore: All right, listen closely. 'This was Hercules' second task.'
Draco: long pause What is to get the golden belt of the Amazon Queen Hippolyte?
Dumbledore: Oh, no!
Audience: groan
Dumbledore: The answer was, 'What was the task of destroying the Hydra.' You got the 10th task and the 2nd mixed up there.
Draco: Darn!
Dumbledore: We feel your pain.
Draco: Greek Mythology for 800, please.
Dumbledore: This man killed his father and married his mother.
Lupin: Who is Oedipus?
Dumbledore: Correct. As you know, the term 'Oedipus Complex' was named after him.
Draco: Erm, we didn't know that.
Dumbledore: How could you not know the term Oedipus Complex?
Draco: shrug how do you know it?
Dumbledore: I read the dictionary for fun!
Contestants: start to laugh
Lupin: I'll take Greek Mythology for 900, please.
Dumbledore: Helen was the one who started the Trojan War. This is the name of her twin sister, who killed her own husband who killed his own daughter, and whose sister and brother helped avenge the death of her father by killing their mother.
Contestants: ???
Dumbledore: Just Helen's twin sister then.
Draco: What is Clymnestra?
Dumbledore: Correct.
Draco: I'll take Greek Mythology for 1000, please.
Dumbledore: According to the myths, this man shot Achilles through the ankle, his only vulnerable spot after his mother, who was related to Poseidon, held him by the ankle and dipped him into a river that made him invisible.
Peeves: Who was R2D2?
Dumbledore: No.
Draco: Who was Paris?
Dumbledore: Correct.
Draco: I'll take Greek Mythology for 1200, please.
Dumbledore: According to the Greek myths, these are the traits of King Midas.
Lupin's buzzer lights up
Lupin: Hey! Who pressed my buzzer?
Dumbledore: You did.
Lupin: I did not!
Peeves snickers
Dumbledore: Well, the correct answer were the Golden Touch and Donkey Ears.
Lupin: Hey, I remember. Except instead of donkey ears they said As-
Dumbledore: That's enough, thank you. We don't want any swearing. We need to keep this rated PG 'cause that is what our fanfic writer made it, or she'll kill us off.
Draco: gasp She's evil!
Dumbledore: You're right. She's a dictator.
Peeves: She's Emperor Nero!
Lupin: She's the Wicked Witch of the West!
Draco: She's Queen Mary!
Dumbledore: She's Tituba!
Cameraman: She's the Queen of Hearts!
Everyone: stare
Cameraman: You know, from Alice in Wonderland?
Everyone: continues staring
Dumbledore: When were you in this conversation, anyway?
Cameraman: shrugs I was just helping.
Dumbledore: But you aren't even supposed to be in this.
Cameraman: I already came in a few chapters ago. You know, when I corrected you on the Peter Pan thing?
Dumbledore: No, I already put the memory in the Pensieve.
Cameraman: sigh Never mind. Forget it.
bell rings
Dumbledore: Noooooooo! We're out of time! We haven't uncovered the secrets to the Malfoys yet!
Draco: Yes!
Peeves: It's all the cameraman's fault!
Dumbledore: All right, we'll just put that for the Malfoy question as our final question for the entire round, which will be next. Because Peeves has a negative 4500, so he can not play on our last round, and is disqualified.
Peeves: pout
Dumbledore: Well, it is down to Draco and Lupin. Draco is in the lead with 6100, while Lupin is almost equal to him with 5700. Don't miss the finals, we will be right back on Jeopardy!
******Commercials******
Hermione: Hermione,
Ginny: And Ginny here, to tell you the do and don'ts for back to school.
Hermione: Do go to Ross. Don't go ANYWHERE else.
Ginny: Check out our new robes!
Hermione: Harry Potter's ULTRA hot.
Harry: Thanks, girls.
Ginny and Hermione: So go to Ross and get low prices! Wooooooo!
***Next Commercial***
Oliver: walks up to a door and rings the bell
Fleur steps out
Oliver: hands her a bouquet of roses Hi, I'm Oliver.
Fleur: I'm Fleur.
Oliver: So, we're going for dinner?
Fleur: All right. starts to step out and sees Oliver's car. It is shaped like a chicken
Fleur: I'm a vegetarian. goes back into house and slams the door shut
Oliver: I-I-I-it's free range chicken.
*****Commercials end*******
My note: Okay, this time, I REALLY MEAN it is going to end in the next chapter. I swear. looks at audience You don't believe me, do you? Well, you will NEVER find a chapter after 16. So be afraid. Be VERY afraid. Haha. Muahaha. MUAHAHAHAHA!
Note: Sorry I hadn't posted in so long. First I got hooked on Neopets, then I had so much stuff, and I got so busy, and then my favorite chat room opened again, and, well, it got pretty messed up. I can't believe how I got hooked on Neopets. Of all the things to get hooked on! Some website that deals with fake money and is like a living Monopoly! Except with battling! Okay, enough about the evil addictions to Neopets.
Dumbledore: Draco Malfoy is in the lead with 6100, Lupin is right behind with 4700, and Peeves holds the ending with negative 3200, a record in all of Jeopardy.
Peeves: grumbles
Dumbledore: Well, our Categories for today are Facts About the Malfoys, Greek Mythology, and Our Jolly British Ways. We will start with Peeves.
Draco: Facts About the Malfoys? Wait a minute-
Peeves: I'll take Our Jolly British Ways for 200, please.
Dumbledore: To Americans, Fish and Chips are actually called this.
Lupin: What are fried fish and french fries?
Dumbledore: Correct.
Lupin: I'll take British Ways for 300.
Dumbledore: This is our nation's favorite sport.
Draco: What is Quidditch?
Dumbledore: I mean the Muggle one.
Lupin: What is football? (soccer)
Dumbledore: Correct.
Lupin: I'll take British ways for 500, please.
Dumbledore: Mary Tudor was the Queen of this place.
Draco: What is Scotland?
Dumbledore: Correct.
Draco: I'll take British Ways for 600, please.
Dumbledore: Translate this sentence to American: See that bonnie wee lass!
Contestants: scratch heads
Dumbledore: What's the matter with you? You are all British!
Draco: We don't know how to translate it into American. That's the problem.
Lupin and Peeves: nod
Dumbledore: Well, it translated to 'Look at the pretty little girl' (okay, in earlier chapters, you may have gotten confused. I do not live in Britain. I was only born there. I left when I was 12 weeks old, and my parents are not British. They are Asian. My name is Scottish. Ailsa is named after Ailsa Craig.)
Contestants: Ohhhhhhhhhhhh. (to Dumbledore's answer, not mine)
Draco: British ways for 800, please.
Dumbledore: This is the hair color for most Irish people.
Draco: What is red?
Dumbledore: Correct.
Peeves: scratches heads I wonder if the Weasleys are Irish.
Lupin: Nah.
Draco: ignoring the other two I'll take British ways for 900.
Dumbledore: Scottish people enjoy drinking. They drink the most on this night and sleep in the streets.
Lupin: What is Saturday?
Dumbledore: Correct.
Peeves: snickers Well, when McGonagall meet the Headmaster to bring ickle Harry to Pivet Drive, people sure weren't drunk lying on the streets.
Draco, Lupin, and Dumbledore: stare
Peeves: Sorry, just had to say that.
Lupin: I'll take British ways for 1100, please.
Dumbledore: English people have either these two hair colors. Dark hair is Scottish, while red is Irish.
Draco: What is light brown and blonde.
Dumbledore: Correct.
Draco: Well, I sure am English, all right.
Lupin: Rowling had light hair, but she was from Scotland.
Dumbledore: Well, I said English people, not Scottish people or Irish. You get some rare hair colors occasionally.
Draco: I'll take British Ways for 1300.
Dumbledore: This Muggle British sport is more like American football than the others.
Draco: What is soccer?
Dumbledore: No.
Lupin: What is rugby?
Dumbledore: Correct.
Lupin: I'll take Greek Mythology for 100, please.
Dumbledore: This is the king of the Greek gods.
Peeves: Who is Ra?
Dumbledore: No. That is Egyptian.
Draco: Who is Zeus?
Dumbledore: Correct.
Draco: Greek Mythology for 200, please.
Dumbledore: These are the names of all 12 Gods sitting on the thrones.
Peeves: Who are Demeter, Bob, Zeus, Dionysus, Hera, Athena, Apollo, Aphrodite, Jennifer, Artemis, Hades, and Poseidon?
Dumbledore: Close, but no.
Draco: How in the world did you get Bob and Jennifer?
Peeves: shrugs
Draco: Who are Demeter, Zeus, Dionysus, Hera, Athena, Artemis, Aphrodite, Hephastus, Hades, Poseidon, and Ares?
Dumbledore: Correct.
Draco: Amazing. I thought I wouldn't get it. I'll take Greek Mythology for 400, please.
Dumbledore: This is the name of the wood nymph that got turned into a tree because Apollo wanted to marry her, but she hated him.
Draco: Who is Daphne?
Lupin: Daphne is the name of the girl on Scooby Doo!
Dumbledore: ignores Lupin's comment That's correct.
Draco: I'll take Greek Mythology for 600, please.
Dumbledore: And the answer is: Daily Double!
Draco: I'll wager 2000.
Dumbledore: All right, listen closely. 'This was Hercules' second task.'
Draco: long pause What is to get the golden belt of the Amazon Queen Hippolyte?
Dumbledore: Oh, no!
Audience: groan
Dumbledore: The answer was, 'What was the task of destroying the Hydra.' You got the 10th task and the 2nd mixed up there.
Draco: Darn!
Dumbledore: We feel your pain.
Draco: Greek Mythology for 800, please.
Dumbledore: This man killed his father and married his mother.
Lupin: Who is Oedipus?
Dumbledore: Correct. As you know, the term 'Oedipus Complex' was named after him.
Draco: Erm, we didn't know that.
Dumbledore: How could you not know the term Oedipus Complex?
Draco: shrug how do you know it?
Dumbledore: I read the dictionary for fun!
Contestants: start to laugh
Lupin: I'll take Greek Mythology for 900, please.
Dumbledore: Helen was the one who started the Trojan War. This is the name of her twin sister, who killed her own husband who killed his own daughter, and whose sister and brother helped avenge the death of her father by killing their mother.
Contestants: ???
Dumbledore: Just Helen's twin sister then.
Draco: What is Clymnestra?
Dumbledore: Correct.
Draco: I'll take Greek Mythology for 1000, please.
Dumbledore: According to the myths, this man shot Achilles through the ankle, his only vulnerable spot after his mother, who was related to Poseidon, held him by the ankle and dipped him into a river that made him invisible.
Peeves: Who was R2D2?
Dumbledore: No.
Draco: Who was Paris?
Dumbledore: Correct.
Draco: I'll take Greek Mythology for 1200, please.
Dumbledore: According to the Greek myths, these are the traits of King Midas.
Lupin's buzzer lights up
Lupin: Hey! Who pressed my buzzer?
Dumbledore: You did.
Lupin: I did not!
Peeves snickers
Dumbledore: Well, the correct answer were the Golden Touch and Donkey Ears.
Lupin: Hey, I remember. Except instead of donkey ears they said As-
Dumbledore: That's enough, thank you. We don't want any swearing. We need to keep this rated PG 'cause that is what our fanfic writer made it, or she'll kill us off.
Draco: gasp She's evil!
Dumbledore: You're right. She's a dictator.
Peeves: She's Emperor Nero!
Lupin: She's the Wicked Witch of the West!
Draco: She's Queen Mary!
Dumbledore: She's Tituba!
Cameraman: She's the Queen of Hearts!
Everyone: stare
Cameraman: You know, from Alice in Wonderland?
Everyone: continues staring
Dumbledore: When were you in this conversation, anyway?
Cameraman: shrugs I was just helping.
Dumbledore: But you aren't even supposed to be in this.
Cameraman: I already came in a few chapters ago. You know, when I corrected you on the Peter Pan thing?
Dumbledore: No, I already put the memory in the Pensieve.
Cameraman: sigh Never mind. Forget it.
bell rings
Dumbledore: Noooooooo! We're out of time! We haven't uncovered the secrets to the Malfoys yet!
Draco: Yes!
Peeves: It's all the cameraman's fault!
Dumbledore: All right, we'll just put that for the Malfoy question as our final question for the entire round, which will be next. Because Peeves has a negative 4500, so he can not play on our last round, and is disqualified.
Peeves: pout
Dumbledore: Well, it is down to Draco and Lupin. Draco is in the lead with 6100, while Lupin is almost equal to him with 5700. Don't miss the finals, we will be right back on Jeopardy!
******Commercials******
Hermione: Hermione,
Ginny: And Ginny here, to tell you the do and don'ts for back to school.
Hermione: Do go to Ross. Don't go ANYWHERE else.
Ginny: Check out our new robes!
Hermione: Harry Potter's ULTRA hot.
Harry: Thanks, girls.
Ginny and Hermione: So go to Ross and get low prices! Wooooooo!
***Next Commercial***
Oliver: walks up to a door and rings the bell
Fleur steps out
Oliver: hands her a bouquet of roses Hi, I'm Oliver.
Fleur: I'm Fleur.
Oliver: So, we're going for dinner?
Fleur: All right. starts to step out and sees Oliver's car. It is shaped like a chicken
Fleur: I'm a vegetarian. goes back into house and slams the door shut
Oliver: I-I-I-it's free range chicken.
*****Commercials end*******
My note: Okay, this time, I REALLY MEAN it is going to end in the next chapter. I swear. looks at audience You don't believe me, do you? Well, you will NEVER find a chapter after 16. So be afraid. Be VERY afraid. Haha. Muahaha. MUAHAHAHAHA!