TITLE: A Face in the Mirror
AUTHOR: Athena Asamiya (empresskatzy@hotmail.com)
SERIES: Guilty Gear X
TYPE: Part 1/1, short Sol-Dizzy confrontation fic, Sol POV.
RATING: PG
WARNING: Some language, not much else.
SETTING: At the end of the events of Guilty Gear X. Yes, it's boss fight time. XD
THEME: "How You Remind Me" by Nickelback. (the iiiiiironyyyyy...XD)
COMMENTS: Well, it's been a long time. And it's not Sol x Ky. But it's definitely not Sol x Dizzy either. >D Man, I despise that coupling. But any way you look at it, it's undeniable that the characters of Sol Badguy and Dizzy share multiple similarities/parallels in both story and, to a lesser extent, personality. So since I already had a fair bit of this one scribbled out, I figured hey, might as well finish it. ^_~ So as a result, my writingness may have gotten a little rusty, but whatever. Gotta keep it up if it's going to keep improving! Enjoy this one, because with university looming over me in a matter of days, who knows when the next one will come out...^^;;;



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The Devil's Living Place. How cute.
"Cute" was a good word to describe it, too. I'd never seen a forest be so nauseatingly beautiful in my entire 165-year existence. Sunlight shining through the draping green leaves, a few sparse woodland animals scattering at my approach, the grass such a bright emerald colour that it practically hurt my eyes. I somehow doubted that this whole encounter could get any more cliché, but there we have it.
I lit a cigarette as I moved, sword in hand, heavy boots leaving depressions in the ground behind me. The sooner I got out of this happy little woods, the sooner I'd be able to get back to my regular profession. Not that I hadn't enjoyed this trip so far; killing Gears was a better waste of time than hunting criminals down, and I hadn't had the chance to destroy a new Gear for over six years now.
If you didn't count Justice.
Welcome to the present day, Mr. Badguy, I reminded myself with an ironic grin. Sure, with a few decades behind me, I had enough things to reminisce about, but now wasn't the time. I had to stay focused on the kill.
Even with the memories of all those I'd defeated nagging at me.
It hadn't been easy, getting here. After the initial public panic at a new Gear, and a possible "second Justice", had settled a bit, and the rather generous bounty on the Gear's head had been announced, more than one wannabe Gear hunter set out to find it and claim the prize for its death. Almost like a race, I reflected, with fighters and soldiers all attempting to track down the Gear first. Whether it was for the money, the fame and prestige, vengeance or otherwise, everyone had a reason to tear the demon to pieces.
...and your reason?
I snickered to myself. Like my reason could even begin to be explained.
Hunter of your own kind-
Of course, there had been confrontations on the way. Amusingly enough, many of the "participants" in the worldwide game of Find-The-Gear had taken part in the tournament from last year, the sham held in order to resurrect Justice -- Gear-01. And who ended up stopping all that shit? You got one guess. As if mankind would ever accept me as their saviour, but like I gave a fuck about that sort of prestige. But I had ran into far too many familiar faces on this new hunt, ones that I both had and hadn't hoped I'd ever see again. Ones that knew too much and ones that didn't even belong in this battle. It didn't make a difference, though -- they all fell in the end. Everyone falls in the end, especially when it's me doing the ending.
falling, bleeding, white and blue cloth and a pair of swords, the knights reunited again
Like that even mattered. No, that little affair was done with, and maybe finally he'd give up. Give me peace for once.
Pausing in the middle of a clearing, I stood still and silent, listening closely to the air and doing my damndest to sense any other presence in the area. Nothing. No trace of Gear energy, no sounds from the trees or bushes. Even though all the rumours and leads pointed to this location, I doubt many would even believe that there was anyone here, let alone the world's last Gear.
But the throb under my headband told me otherwise.
I tapped the end of Fuenken against my boot, one hand shoved carelessly in a pocket. "Come on out, Gear. I don't have all day to kill you." Short and to the point. More likely to scare it the hell away, but I wouldn't mind a quick pursuit. No sign of it, though, not even in response to my words--
Suddenly, another voice rang out through the clearing, answering my own. "Please, just leave me alone!"
High-pitched but soft, pleading. A girl's.
A girl's?
A human voice?
Can't be-
I stepped forward, slowly at first, then I found myself moving faster than before towards the direction of the voice. I had to see this for myself, but at the same time I didn't want it to be true, couldn't even believe it, it shouldn't be possible...
Then I saw my opponent, the last monster, crouched beside a crumbled pillar in the middle of what looked to be a ruined Eden. Beautiful gardens, trees, fountains...and my target right in the center of it all.
Gear, human, a human Gear-
The Chimera.
She looked young, only around 15 or 16 in appearance, all tarted up in a skimpy little black leather thing that HAD to be worn for easier maneuvering rather than comfort. Her cerulean blue hair was tied up into two looping ponytails with yellow ribbons, wisps of it brushing her bare forehead.
There was no symbol on her forehead.
But she did have a few things that definitely made her inhuman -- such as the huge, feathered, two-tone wings that extended from her back, and the long black reptilian tail that swept the ground behind her, tied with a small yellow ribbon. No symbol, but animal characteristics.
Gear...
...and human.
Oh God no not another one-
Another one that was my fault.
The gothic-looking asshole, the dead-looking one all in black who had tried to stop me from getting here...he didn't have the Gear stigma either. But that was because he had been human first, as he had gleefully told me at that tournament last year. An improvement, he had said then, even if he DID regret it now - came to your senses, did you - and was as damn guilty as I was. Humans were the inferior species, even though he himself had been one.
Like me.
The scientist Frederick...the one who had originally conceived a Gear within himself...no one knew that he was me. I had made sure as hell to keep that little detail to myself -- the detail being that I was the Gear he had created by using his own body and skill. As different as we may be, nothing changed the fact that I was once him and he was now me. The guilty scientist and the guilty Gear.
And this, on the ground in front of me, was the Chimera itself.
I'd heard of the project. It hadn't been proposed during my - or rather Frederick's - time, but anyone who followed the progression of Gear technology through the early 22nd century knew about the offshoot project that aimed to create a new type of Gear -- one with the combined body of human and animal. Not just the genes or the instincts, like normal Gears -- even the appearance was to be both human and monster.
Wings and a tail. And power beyond belief.
If I had been able to feel fear, I might have sensed a slight twinge of it in me at that realization. The Chimera was meant to surpass Justice in terms of strength, but unfortunately, it was also made to be more human-
The Chimera stood up quickly, feathered wings shifting and extending slightly before settling again. She looked all too ready to bolt, especially at the sight of Fuenken, and her huge crimson eyes shot me a terrified look. "What are you doing here? Please, leave this place!"
I shrugged idly, a deep smirk creasing my face. "After all the work it took to find you? Not happening. I went through hell to get here and you're just gonna have to face me, Gear." The pulsing sensation on my forehead continued. Damn it all, I didn't want to be reminded. Not now.
She backed away, tail twitching, frightened look staying etched on her face. She looked like she was used to this sort of confrontation, no matter how well hidden this little spot was. "I...I don't want to hurt you."
I snickered. "I think you should be more worried about me hurting you. I'm a Gear hunter and I came here to get rid of you."
She didn't seem so threatened by that as she was initially confused by what I had said. "A Gear hunter? But you are....like me, aren't you? You are one of us. I can tell." She touched her forehead lightly, as if to motion to the symbol that lay hidden underneath my headband. I could tell from her cautious face and carefully-chosen words that she was trying to be sensitive, but what she said still pissed me off. It happened any time I was reminded of what I really was. And she knew. Of course she knew.
"Shut the fuck up," I snarled in return, causing the girl to wince. "I'm not one of you. I'm NOTHING like you."
Of course, she seemed a bit more hesitant to keep up our little conversation, but dammit, she was persistent. Just like a child. "But...you are a Gear as well, like Testament and I." She paused before asking the question. "Are we...are we the only ones left?"
I couldn't tell if she was hopeful, or worried, or what. So for some reason that I couldn't figure out at all, I decided I might as well just answer her. She probably deserved an answer. "...Yeah. None others left on Earth. The lot of `em were destroyed five years ago, after Justice's death" -I flashed a particularly violent-looking sneer- "most at my hands, of course."
The little girl sucked in a breath, blue hair falling across her face, eyes wide with shock. "You killed Gears? You killed your own kind?"
The familiar rage flashed before my eyes once more. "Dammit, I said I'm NOT like them! I'm not-"
Not a Gear?
I can't say that.
But not quite human, either...not anymore.
"You don't understand anything. You don't know what Gears are really like. You're an exception -- the Chimera, a freak. We're - you, me and that other jackass" -by now, I couldn't believe I was going to tell her this- "...we were human first." I looked away, glaring at a spot on the ground. "We're not like the other Gears were. We're half-breeds. Lab specimens, guinea pigs of human scientists."
"That's....it's horrible," she eventually whispered, one hand pressed to her mouth. "I knew I was different, but I didn't know how it had happened...Testament told me that I should never blame myself, because none of it was my fault. He said that we were different, but we were special, and that our kind was hunted because of it. Because others don't understand what we are."
"Huh." I stuck Fuenken in the ground and leaned on it, lighting another cigarette. "He got that right. Nobody could understand. All anybody could do is fight....and try to get your answers that way." I exhaled, watching the smoke cloud the air. "The world works that way, kid. Kill or be killed. We've got the advantage in this game, and that's why they hate us." The last part came out as a murmur, almost thoughtful.
And then came her question, spoken in desperation and frustration and any number of too-human emotions. "But is violence really the only solution?!"
As I looked into those child's eyes, almost startled by the question, I figured out what had been nagging at me since I saw her. I was like her. Or, more appropriately, she was like me. Like I once was, when I was struggling with an identity and a purpose that I had never wanted.
I knew, all too painfully well, what it was like to be in the position she was in now. Scared of your own existence, terrified by the thought of others seeing you as a demon, hating your uncontrollable powers and feeling like no one would be able to ever touch you again-
I knew.
And what had I done, when I was in her place? Decimated a few cities, killed a few hundred people, turned against my own kind and began killing them instead, learned how to deal with the fact that I couldn't feel any remorse.
I couldn't feel.
But a part of me - the Gear - had been pleased by that.
Until my humanity decided to stop all that. No more destruction, no more blood. It was the last shred of Frederick's existence, keeping me from the insanity that was the Gear. As much as I hated him for what he'd done - that big fucking mistake of bringing me to life - without him, I'd still be mindless.
Seeking salvation through others. I smirked, one face coming to mind. He may have been offering me salvation from the beginning, but I didn't deserve to take it. I shook my head with caustic expression still carefully in place, none too easily brushing away the wave of pain that accompanied that brief memory.
Damn those blue eyes.
It was then that I realized she was still waiting for my answer, an answer I couldn't give because I didn't have it. Not now, not yet. In that way, I was still the Gear and would always be the Gear, because all I knew was violence. I didn't know any other way to live. I paused for even longer, then shifted my weight and tossed the rest of my cigarette away, refusing to meet her gaze. "It's not just us -- not just Gears or humans. Violence is all this world can comprehend."
And when she went silent at this answer, I knew that it wasn't ME she was scared of -- she was scared of herself. And she'd figured out what I meant by all this -- that I wasn't gonna be stopped here, by anything she said. It was all going to come down to the fight. Taking another short step towards me, she clasped both hands in front of her, wings rustling slightly from the movement. "We're both Gears who don't want to hurt others. We both want peace. We shouldn't have to do this."
Was that the truth? Was this Gear - this little girl - speaking the truth?
Part of me wanted to agree. Part of me wanted to understand. But it had been too long, far too long, and after all this time, I knew there could be no conclusion without a fight. They had finality. They ended matters.
I had to end this. For her sake, and his, and mine. And so much more beyond that.
Taking a breath, I stepped back, Fuenken held tightly in one hand and trying to ignore the look on her face. "Tell me your name before we fight."
She gazed at me with sad, innocent eyes. An innocent Gear. Dammit, I don't think I can do this... "Dizzy. I call myself Dizzy."
Good. This victim wouldn't be nameless. "Have you ever killed anyone, Dizzy?"
She shook her head desperately. "No, never!"
I stepped back, fingers tensing around Fuenken's grip, remorseless eyes locked on hers. "Then you'd better fight like you're trying to kill. Otherwise you won't stand a chance against me."
Knowing that there was no way to talk me out of this anymore, Dizzy stared at me for a long time, then slowly nodded once, lowering her head. "I understand. If there is no other way...." And here she lifted her head again, red eyes opening, and inside them I thought I could see the Justice within her. The Gear that was within us all. "I'll fight to show you the truth."
The truth from a Gear.
As we both rushed into battle, I knew that whatever the outcome of this fight, whatever the "truth" was, it'd be the only thing left for me to face.



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Guilty Gear X fanfiction "A Face in the Mirror" © Athena Asamiya, 2002.

Use in whole or in part of this fanfiction without permission is prohibited. If you wish to use this songfiction for any purpose, please obtain permission prior to doing so.

empresskatzy@hotmail.com

Guilty Gear, Sol Badguy and Dizzy, copyright 1998-2002 Sammy Co., Arc System Works Co., Team Neo Blood, and Atlus.



tragic/scientist+manmade/demon+holy/saviour+disturbed/darkness =
twisted/shattered/star-crossed lovers =
sol x ky
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