Chapter 8-Disowned
Willow ran. She ran to the only place she could think of. It was the one place she knew and trusted since she was a child; where she had lived all her life.
6305 Westminster Place.
At least that is where she had lived five years ago, even though it literally felt like just yesterday to her. It was so confusing at times, she couldn't keep things to straight for long. Her home still had to be the same, she reasoned with herself. Her Mom and Dad would always be there for her, after all. If things had changed drastically, wouldn't Giles have told her?
As she approached the house, she didn't notice anything different. Then again, looking at the world around her with eyes blurry from tears, she wasn't exactly seeing too clearly.
All she could think of was home. She wanted to just go to her room and lie on her bed. She wanted to cry into her pillow. That's all she wanted. Something familiar. Was that too much to ask for?
She went up to the door and grabbed the doorknob. She began to turn it. Suddenly, it opened for her and someone she never saw before looked at her with curiosity and suspicion. He was a man, but he wasn't her father.
Fearfully she stepped back and looked up at him. "I-I'm sorry," she blurted out. "I-I just--"
"Are you okay?" the man asked her. "Do you need help?" He looked at her with concern, but he kept himself in the doorway, blocking the entrance into his home. He didn't know who this young woman was. She could be any one of those crazy people often talked about on the news.
"Uhm...Rosenberg," she managed to say.
He shook his head. "No. They don't live here any more. They moved some time ago."
Willow froze. She tried to comprehend what the man was saying. "M-moved? But...why? I mean, uh, where did they move to?" She looked up at him, desperate to know.
The man looked at her. "I don't know where they moved off to. They never told anyone as far as I know. I can tell you why they moved though. Because of the strange things that went on around here. They just didn't like it any more, and then one day, they decided to sell the place and move."
"When..." she swallowed, "when d-did they move?"
"After their daughter went off to college." He shook his head. "I guess that was the straw that broke the camels back. They took their daughter's key from her when she moved out and told her she wasn't welcome any more."
Willow wanted so badly to die. She couldn't believe her parents would kick her out. "B-but why?"
The man shrugged. "They said she was a witch. Into witchcraft and all that garbage. Hey, my kids don't get into that. I'd disown them, too." He paused. "What's your name, anyway?"
Willow hesitated. "I'm-I'm sorry to disturb you," she said quietly. Then she turned, and in a daze, she began to walk away.
"Hey," the man called after her, "are you okay?" He watched her walk up the driveway. "Miss?"
Willow didn't answer. She didn't even hear him. She just kept walking and didn't even care where she was walking to. All she knew was that her friends never knew her, and she had been disowned by her parents for something she never did.
There was nowhere to go.
She stopped walking and remembered something.
There was a place. It was the only place she could remember, the only safe place. She turned around and headed for it at a run. She didn't stop running until she was there.
Willow found herself panting by the time she reached the base of the tree where the old fort was. She put her hands on the wooden ladder that Xander had pounded into the tree years ago. It was a good, strong ladder, even now, she thought as she felt along the wood. Xander was always good with his hands. He would make a fine carpenter some day, at least he would have. Now there was some blonde on his arm who probably wanted him to be something he wasn't.
She leaned against the tree and cried. The pain was too much. Her stomach hurt, her body trembled with fatigue. She was an emotional wreck. How could she possibly cope in this world now? After she saw this Anya storm into the kitchen, demanding to know what her Xander was doing hugging another woman...
Willow doubled over as a wave of pain struck her. She threw up, and afterward, she leaned against the tree. She looked up and began to climb it. She found the trap door that led inside, and climbed in. It was dark, but the moonlight through the window helped her see the lantern. After a few tries, she managed to light the lantern and she looked around the fort that had once been hers and Xander's.
Her eyes stopped at the Friendship Nail. There it was, her first nail. She remembered pounding it in, or at least trying to, and wound up banging her thumb. The little sign Xander made was still there.
REFUGE
And under that...
THE FRIENDSHIP NAIL
Willow touched the nail and smiled fondly at the memories, which flooded her mind. They were good memories. She looked over at the window and realized Xander had found time to put in a real one. He had even made a little desk. His sleeping bag was rolled up under it. She put the lantern on top of the desk and saw a photo album.
Sniffing, she wiped at her eyes, took the book, and then sat down to look at the photo's.
Every photo was of her and Xander, or just her. There was a picture of her and Xander at the local ice cream parlor, out on the picnic table in front of the shop. They were sitting close and smiling at the camera. There was a picture of Xander pulling her along as she sat on a red wagon. Their first picnic at 5. That's when he had stolen her Barbie. There were more pictures, and as she looked at them, she began to realize something.
She remembered every one of them.
These pictures had been taken before she lost her five years. There were no pictures of her after Madison had forced her into exile. The last picture in the book was of Willow on the ladder above Xander. She had her arms around his neck as he stood in front of the ladder. They were both smiling.
"Why no more pictures?" she wondered out loud. She looked up and saw an old shoe box.
Curious, she reached for the box next to the sleeping bag under the desk, pulled it out, and opened it. She stared in wonder.
There was her Barbie. The one Xander had stolen. It even still looked brand new. She took it out. There were a few other things in there as well. Some old baseball cards. A sling-shot. A hammer and some nails. A few pens.
She looked.
A journal.
She took it out. Hesitantly, she opened it and she immediately saw Xander's hand writing. There were only a few pages written, and she read them. There were no dates, just thoughts jotted down.
**Today I sat and waited for Will. She never showed. I thought with what happened at school today, she would come to the Refuge and we could both deal with what happened to Principal Flutie. I feel lonely without her. Will hasn't come to the Refuge since what happened with Amy and Amy's psycho-Mom.**
Willow took a deep breath.
**My life is over. I can't deal with this anymore. Something's wrong with this picture in perfect USA Sunnydale. I mean, what does she see in Oz any way besides a lot of hair and really bad breath? She's changing. Or maybe she already has changed and I missed it somehow. It's not just about her going out with wolfy-boy. It's the magic she's getting into. What is that all about? I don't like what it's doing to her? My yellow-crayon breaker has turned into a girl with a bewitching attitude.**
Willow turned the page.
**The Willow I knew is gone. I am so shocked beyond words, I am stunned beyond belief. Magic, and now this. She's going out with another girl. Willow, where are you? I thought we'd always be together. I miss you so badly, it hurts. Sure, I'm the kind of guy who laughs at all my woes and keeps an upper lip, but when I'm alone and no one sees me, I'm just another guy who misses his girl.**
Willow looked at the last entry Xander had written.
**Willow, I love you. Xander. PS: Whenever I close my eyes, you're all I dream about. I know we don't talk like we used to. I guess things change. I know things have turned out differently than either one of us had ever expected. I just wish I could tell you that no matter what, I'll always love you and no one else. Even if by some small chance, I do find someone out there, she'll never be you. She'll never be Willow Rosenberg.**
Willow sat against the wall and held the journal close to her chest. She realized suddenly that is some small way, Xander did notice something strange about who she was during those five years. He had known she wasn't the same.
For the first time since she was free from exile, Willow began to feel hope.
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TO BE CONTINUED--
Willow ran. She ran to the only place she could think of. It was the one place she knew and trusted since she was a child; where she had lived all her life.
6305 Westminster Place.
At least that is where she had lived five years ago, even though it literally felt like just yesterday to her. It was so confusing at times, she couldn't keep things to straight for long. Her home still had to be the same, she reasoned with herself. Her Mom and Dad would always be there for her, after all. If things had changed drastically, wouldn't Giles have told her?
As she approached the house, she didn't notice anything different. Then again, looking at the world around her with eyes blurry from tears, she wasn't exactly seeing too clearly.
All she could think of was home. She wanted to just go to her room and lie on her bed. She wanted to cry into her pillow. That's all she wanted. Something familiar. Was that too much to ask for?
She went up to the door and grabbed the doorknob. She began to turn it. Suddenly, it opened for her and someone she never saw before looked at her with curiosity and suspicion. He was a man, but he wasn't her father.
Fearfully she stepped back and looked up at him. "I-I'm sorry," she blurted out. "I-I just--"
"Are you okay?" the man asked her. "Do you need help?" He looked at her with concern, but he kept himself in the doorway, blocking the entrance into his home. He didn't know who this young woman was. She could be any one of those crazy people often talked about on the news.
"Uhm...Rosenberg," she managed to say.
He shook his head. "No. They don't live here any more. They moved some time ago."
Willow froze. She tried to comprehend what the man was saying. "M-moved? But...why? I mean, uh, where did they move to?" She looked up at him, desperate to know.
The man looked at her. "I don't know where they moved off to. They never told anyone as far as I know. I can tell you why they moved though. Because of the strange things that went on around here. They just didn't like it any more, and then one day, they decided to sell the place and move."
"When..." she swallowed, "when d-did they move?"
"After their daughter went off to college." He shook his head. "I guess that was the straw that broke the camels back. They took their daughter's key from her when she moved out and told her she wasn't welcome any more."
Willow wanted so badly to die. She couldn't believe her parents would kick her out. "B-but why?"
The man shrugged. "They said she was a witch. Into witchcraft and all that garbage. Hey, my kids don't get into that. I'd disown them, too." He paused. "What's your name, anyway?"
Willow hesitated. "I'm-I'm sorry to disturb you," she said quietly. Then she turned, and in a daze, she began to walk away.
"Hey," the man called after her, "are you okay?" He watched her walk up the driveway. "Miss?"
Willow didn't answer. She didn't even hear him. She just kept walking and didn't even care where she was walking to. All she knew was that her friends never knew her, and she had been disowned by her parents for something she never did.
There was nowhere to go.
She stopped walking and remembered something.
There was a place. It was the only place she could remember, the only safe place. She turned around and headed for it at a run. She didn't stop running until she was there.
Willow found herself panting by the time she reached the base of the tree where the old fort was. She put her hands on the wooden ladder that Xander had pounded into the tree years ago. It was a good, strong ladder, even now, she thought as she felt along the wood. Xander was always good with his hands. He would make a fine carpenter some day, at least he would have. Now there was some blonde on his arm who probably wanted him to be something he wasn't.
She leaned against the tree and cried. The pain was too much. Her stomach hurt, her body trembled with fatigue. She was an emotional wreck. How could she possibly cope in this world now? After she saw this Anya storm into the kitchen, demanding to know what her Xander was doing hugging another woman...
Willow doubled over as a wave of pain struck her. She threw up, and afterward, she leaned against the tree. She looked up and began to climb it. She found the trap door that led inside, and climbed in. It was dark, but the moonlight through the window helped her see the lantern. After a few tries, she managed to light the lantern and she looked around the fort that had once been hers and Xander's.
Her eyes stopped at the Friendship Nail. There it was, her first nail. She remembered pounding it in, or at least trying to, and wound up banging her thumb. The little sign Xander made was still there.
REFUGE
And under that...
THE FRIENDSHIP NAIL
Willow touched the nail and smiled fondly at the memories, which flooded her mind. They were good memories. She looked over at the window and realized Xander had found time to put in a real one. He had even made a little desk. His sleeping bag was rolled up under it. She put the lantern on top of the desk and saw a photo album.
Sniffing, she wiped at her eyes, took the book, and then sat down to look at the photo's.
Every photo was of her and Xander, or just her. There was a picture of her and Xander at the local ice cream parlor, out on the picnic table in front of the shop. They were sitting close and smiling at the camera. There was a picture of Xander pulling her along as she sat on a red wagon. Their first picnic at 5. That's when he had stolen her Barbie. There were more pictures, and as she looked at them, she began to realize something.
She remembered every one of them.
These pictures had been taken before she lost her five years. There were no pictures of her after Madison had forced her into exile. The last picture in the book was of Willow on the ladder above Xander. She had her arms around his neck as he stood in front of the ladder. They were both smiling.
"Why no more pictures?" she wondered out loud. She looked up and saw an old shoe box.
Curious, she reached for the box next to the sleeping bag under the desk, pulled it out, and opened it. She stared in wonder.
There was her Barbie. The one Xander had stolen. It even still looked brand new. She took it out. There were a few other things in there as well. Some old baseball cards. A sling-shot. A hammer and some nails. A few pens.
She looked.
A journal.
She took it out. Hesitantly, she opened it and she immediately saw Xander's hand writing. There were only a few pages written, and she read them. There were no dates, just thoughts jotted down.
**Today I sat and waited for Will. She never showed. I thought with what happened at school today, she would come to the Refuge and we could both deal with what happened to Principal Flutie. I feel lonely without her. Will hasn't come to the Refuge since what happened with Amy and Amy's psycho-Mom.**
Willow took a deep breath.
**My life is over. I can't deal with this anymore. Something's wrong with this picture in perfect USA Sunnydale. I mean, what does she see in Oz any way besides a lot of hair and really bad breath? She's changing. Or maybe she already has changed and I missed it somehow. It's not just about her going out with wolfy-boy. It's the magic she's getting into. What is that all about? I don't like what it's doing to her? My yellow-crayon breaker has turned into a girl with a bewitching attitude.**
Willow turned the page.
**The Willow I knew is gone. I am so shocked beyond words, I am stunned beyond belief. Magic, and now this. She's going out with another girl. Willow, where are you? I thought we'd always be together. I miss you so badly, it hurts. Sure, I'm the kind of guy who laughs at all my woes and keeps an upper lip, but when I'm alone and no one sees me, I'm just another guy who misses his girl.**
Willow looked at the last entry Xander had written.
**Willow, I love you. Xander. PS: Whenever I close my eyes, you're all I dream about. I know we don't talk like we used to. I guess things change. I know things have turned out differently than either one of us had ever expected. I just wish I could tell you that no matter what, I'll always love you and no one else. Even if by some small chance, I do find someone out there, she'll never be you. She'll never be Willow Rosenberg.**
Willow sat against the wall and held the journal close to her chest. She realized suddenly that is some small way, Xander did notice something strange about who she was during those five years. He had known she wasn't the same.
For the first time since she was free from exile, Willow began to feel hope.
xwxwxwxwxwxwxwxwxwxwxwxwxwxwxwxwxwxwxwxwxwxwxwxwxwxwx
TO BE CONTINUED--