(camera turns on. Harry sitting w/hand over Bunsen burner) Ahem. I have finally- eyes roll to back of head) :cough: finally found something to keep my mind on something other than my crystals…(eyes roll back again) Um…I'm going to create my own outdoors show, complete w/ wild animals! Alright, see you tomorrow! (turns off burner stands up) Bye. (leaves. After gone, Hermione stands up from "under" table, wiping her mouth) (Authors note: Did I just write that?)
RON:
I have finally chosen my talent!!! Door opening! For this video diary entry, I have chosen to tape in a room w/ many doors, just to practice. (walks to door, and opens it) See, here's a classroom, (opens another) P.U. !!! A dungeon!!! (opens another door) Oh, a closet! (looks inside) whoops, looks like Dumbledore's still hiding in there. Umm, I think I'll run away now…
MALFOY:
Hi my name's 2 toed todd. I bet you're wondering why im called 2-toed. Well, I have 2 toes. I used to be a happy child, until my mom made me get a job. I mean, I was only 26! Well, so my first job was @ McDonald's. I came home everyday with an aching back and head. Oh no, I didn't just flip burgers, I did cash too!!! It was all okay, until my manager fired me. He said I was a moron. I mean, how was I supposed to know that smiles were free?
Anyway, so I was out of a job until this really nice car pulled up close to me and some guy offered me a job. His name was Tony. My first job was to stand in this washroom and shoot some guy. But when he came in, I got scared and accidentally fired @ my toes. Hence the "2-toed". So Tony didn't fire me (he's the greatest) instead, I got a job in garbage disposal. I had to throw away these huge garbage bags, they were so heavy, like there was a body in it or something…(shakes head) anyways, once I was throwing a bag into the river. So I picked it up and it broke! Guess what? Hundreds of body parts fell out! All of a sudden there were police cars everywhere so I ran away as fast as I could! I mean, I didn't want to get arrested for littering or something.
So I went home. My mom, she's a falafel baker, told me to get another job, cause Indiana (which is where we live) was big. So I went back to Tony and he gave me a new job, answering phones.
One day, one of Tony's friends called. He told me his name was Officer Norman. I mean, what kind of a name is officer? But he asked me some questions, and since he was Tony's friend I told him about this shed Tony has, its full of- I dunno- baby powder or something. I was so proud that I did Tony a facour! But later, Tony told me to leave. I said that I needed money. So Tony gave me this suitcase full of thousand $ bills! I was rich.
I went straight home and showed it to my mom. And you know what she did? She arrested me!!!
Huh, and I always thought the FBI on the back of her coat meant Falafal backer of Indiana. (walks away, twitching and limping)
Entry #6 HARRY
(in front of elephant) I will attempt to put this (takes out orange teeshirt) on the elephant. (Harry climbs on, gets crushed into a bloody pulp) This is actually quite painful…Okay tune in next week when I try to breastfeed a wolf!