This chapter contains extremely mature and violent content. Reader discretion advised.
Rated NC-17
"Someone, please! Help me!" I screamed again. It turned into a wordless scream as his mouth closed over my breast and he bit it savagely.
"Didn't I tell you to be quiet?" he said, slapping me again. He got up on his knees without removing the one against my body, undid his pants and shoved them down. I was frightened by the sight of him; he used the pause in my struggle for freedom to his advantage, pinning my shoulders down, removing his knee and then forcing himself inside my body.
I screamed. His entry hurt. "How many times do I have to tell you to shut up?" he yelled, covering my mouth with one hand. "Jeez, you're tight," he continued in a snarl, pulling himself almost out of my body and then shoving back inside. "Why hasn't anyone ever fucked you properly before?"
I felt like I was on fire. Every nerve screamed in protest to his actions. I started to twist beneath him, hoping to get my head free at least so I could scream for help again.
"Would you hold still!" he demanded, shifting so he was covering my body with his own. I doubled my efforts, trying to throw him off. "Hold still!" he started again, and then literally flew sideways. Unfortunately, the blow wasn't hard enough to remove him from my body.
I looked up; Tashi stood over us, a long piece of wood in his hands and a furious expression on his face. Kyle looked up too, and snarled primally.
"Get off of her," Tashi said calmly. That frightened me. Tashi was always calm, but when it was coupled with that expression, I wanted to run and hide.
Kyle thrust into me again before removing himself completely from my body on the outward stroke. His exit hurt just as much as his entry and my head swam in pain. He stood up, wrapped his hand around himself and quickly moved it back and forth until he ejaculated, in front of Tashi, and all over me. The stuff was sticky, and I did throw up then, rolling quickly to one side and emptying my stomach of what little was in it. Kyle shoved himself back inside his pants, did them up and faced Tashi. "Just want her for yourself?" he said mockingly. "Here's a tip for you -- she's a lousy lay."
Tashi's expression soured more and he whacked the unsuspecting Kyle full in the face with his stick. Kyle went down with a thud! Tashi turned to me, still angry.
I shrank back, crossing my arms tightly over my chest and drawing my knees high, turning away from him at the same time. Then Risa was beside me, throwing a blanket over me and wrapping me up in her arms.
"Snap out of it, Tashi," she said angrily. "Mei was not a willing party to that."
His expression didn't change for a moment; then it slowly softened, and he lowered his stick, dropping it once the end hit the floor. He sank to his knees and crawled across the distance between us, going opposite to Risa and sliding his arms around me.
"I'm sorry, Mei," he whispered, and he sounded like he was crying. "I am so, so sorry."
I started to cry as well, the full impact of Kyle's actions finally hitting me. Mine were understandable; Tashi's weren't. Both of them held me, not saying a word, but giving me the comfort I needed right then.
"Are you hurt?" Tashi asked after a few minutes. "If he hurt you, I swear I'll kill him."
I couldn't look at him. Instead, I just pulled the blanket down to expose my breast. There were sluggishly bleeding wounds where Kyle had bit me. I knew I would have several bruises, some very nasty, in a day or two, and I wasn't sure if I would ever walk normally again. His entry and continued thrusting had left me burning down there. I pulled the blanket up to my waist and saw the trails of blood streaking my inner thighs.
"I'll kill him," Tashi stated bleakly, pulling me closer to him and burying his face in my wet hair.
"Well, do that then," Risa said. "I'm taking Mei to get cleaned up." She forced Tashi's arms down and pulled me to my feet, wrapping the blanket fully around my body and leading me away.
We left the bath room and were going down the hallway to our medical area when I stopped walking and just dropped to the floor, clutching the blanket close and crying hysterically.
"Mei, c'mon, get up," Risa urged, tugging at my arm. "Kyle's just an arrogant Easterner who needed to be taught a lesson. He's not worth it."
"It's not that!" I cried. "I just feel so...so wrong...and the look on Tashi's face after he clobbered Kyle..." I started to cry beyond the capacity of being able to speak through it.
"Oh, Mei, why are you worried about that?" Risa knelt beside me and hugged me again, resting her head comfortingly on my back. "Tashi was just upset that he let Kyle get to you before he could warn you. He thought you could take care of yourself, but where Kyle's concerned...You should have seen the look on his face when he heard you screaming. We were working on Unit-00 and he just froze, dropping his welding tool all the way to the bay floor and dashing off like his ass was on fire."
I was surprised to hear Risa use that paticualr word; she wasn't the type to use slang very often, and almost never did. But what surprised me more was her story of Tashi's actions. I hadn't thought that he cared for me that much...
I slowly looked up at her; she nodded to my unspoken question. I closed my eyes and then wiped the tears on my cheeks away with the back of my hand. "Okay, then, let's get to med." I let her help me up and down the hall to the medical area.
It didn't take long to get me cleaned up. The blood and ejaculate washed away easily, leaving only the bite marks on my breast, the bruises on my face and the ache between my legs to attest to Kyle's rough handling of me. Risa was very professional, and she pronounced me fit to wear the plug suit in three days. Until then, I was to wear loose shirts, protective wrapping about my breasts, and skirts. I didn't mind; I felt sore enough that I didn't want to even think about using the plug suit just yet. She even brought out clothing that I could wear until then.
I had just finished getting dressed and was sitting down slowly -- and rather painfully -- on the bed there when Tashi quietly knocked on the door and entered cautiously, carrying a steaming mug in his hands.
"Are you alright?" he asked, a slow flush coming over his face. He approached me almost as if I had some sort of disease that he didn't want and sat down next to me on the bed. "Here, I brought you something to drink," he added, offering me the mug.
I made a ghost of a smile and accepted the mug with an almost inaudible, "Thank you." I sipped at the contents and found that it was apple cider, my favourite hot drink -- and the hardest one to find. We sat there in silence for a few moments, until he turned to me and began talking.
"Mei, I...," he began awkwardly. "That is, I...I mean...oh damn it!" He leaned forward and covered his face in his hands. When he looked up again, he was bright red and there were tears in his eyes. "Mei, I'm sorry that I let Kyle do that to you," he whispered, his voice sounding as though he had to force it out. "I...I'm sorry it took his rape of you to realize how much I care for you." He turned away from me then.
I nearly dropped the mug, staring at him in amazement. "Tashi, I...," I started, interupted when Risa came back into the room, carrying a small jar of something white.
"Mei, I want -- oh." She stopped talking when she saw Tashi, though she didn't stop walking towards us. "Tashi, could you leave us for a moment?" she asked, cocking her head at him. He nodded and got up, leaving the room quietly.
Risa gave me the jar and gave me instructions on where and when to use it. "We'll see how you're doing in three days," she said, wrapping me in a hug again. "I'm not going to force you into the entry plug of Unit-01 until you're ready to. Promise me that you won't go back until you think you can handle it, alright? I don't know how you're going to hold up under the mental stress of that position right now."
"Promise," I got out around a closed throat.
I left after that. Tashi was waiting just outside; he offered his hand. "I'll help you back to your room," he suggested. I took it with another ghost-smile. He led me slowly down the hall, and I was grateful that he did. I moved slowly, and as though I had a log between my legs.
It took awhile to get to the room I shared with Risa; when we reached it, Tashi led me inside, and helped me sit on my bed. Then he gently pushed my still-damp hair back from my face and looked me calmly in the eyes. "Need me for anything else?" he asked.
I couldn't even smile. "Stay with me tonight, please," I whispered, feeling tears gather in my eyes again.
He sighed and closed his eyes briefly. "Anything," he said as he opened them.
I got up then, handing him my mug and heading slowly into the washroom. "Doctor's orders," I explained, turning on the light and closing the door.
I leaned against the door, fighting a losing battle against the tears that threatened to spill over. Then I managed to get a hold of myself, pulled the jar of cream out of my pocket, set it on the counter, pulled the skirt off and sat on the toilet to administer it.
I nearly screamed in pain as the cool cream touched my flaming skin. I did draw a sharp breath and had to hold it for a few long seconds before I could continue. When I left the washroom, I was in tears. Tashi leaped up from the seat he had taken on my bed and set the mug down hurriedly, rushing to my side. "Are you alright?" he asked anxiously, taking my elbow in one hand and placing the other on my opposite shoulder.
"I will be," I answered, my voice tight with pain. "I was led to believe that first times weren't quite that bad."
He looked confused for a moment; then his eyes flashed angrily. "Most first times didn't involve rape," he answered, helping me sit down again.
I lay down on my bed and turned away from Tashi. He pulled my blankets up over my body to my shoulders, smoothing them down around my torso. "I'm here, Mei," he whispered. "I'm not going to leave you."
It was several hours still before I could sleep, and when I did, my dreams were filled with nightmares of Kyle and the horrible act he had commited on me today.
They let me sleep in, which was nice, I guess. I didn't really like sleeping in. It went against everything I had ever been taught.
As soon as I thought that, I started to cry again. It didn't matter whether I'd had the chance to sleep in or not, all that mattered was that they had left me alone. I was by myself right when I didn't want to be.
Remembering Risa's instructions, I got myself out of bed, feeling even more sore and stiff than I had yesterday. I made my way to the bathroom, applied the cream, and took a long, good look at my reflection in the mirror.
Bruises had formed on my cheeks. They were an ugly purple colour that was black in the middle. The outsides of the bruises were just starting to turn blue. To top it all off, my face was red from my recent crying, and the undamaged skin was puffy, though whether it was from tears or the abuse, I wasn't sure. Tears formed in my eyes again. It was so hard to believe...just yesterday morning...I had felt so safe...
Then I noticed the pair of scissors on the countertop. Risa must have left them there, though for what purpose I couldn't imagine. Almost as if I couldn't stop myself, I reached over and grabbed them. As I looked back at myself, I wondered what I would do with them. I couldn't kill myself, even though I really wished I could. There was just no way I could leave Tashi and Risa...or Unit-01.
I caught sight of my hair, uncombed since it had been washed the day before. The more I stared at it, the more it seemed like the perfect target. My hair had been my only vanity.
I grabbed a handful, and began sawing away at it with the scissors.
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Characters & concept: © 1997-2002 Katsura /\ Evangelion © Gainax