Crono and The Amazing Technicolor Headband!!
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Chrono Trigger(Square does), and I don't own Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat(Andrew Lloyd Webber does)
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Number #5: Poor Crono
Narrator: Next day, far from home, the brothers planned a repulsive crime.
Brothers: Let us grab him now, do him now while we've got the time!
Narrator: This they did and made the most of it. (O.o) They tore his band and threw him in a flaming grease pit.
Brothers: Let us leave him here all alone and he's bound to fry!
Narrator: When some Mystics, a colorful crew, came riding by. (insert Ismaelite/Mystic music here) In a flash, the brothers changed their plans.
Brothers: We need cash! Let's prostitute him if we can.
Narrator: Poor poor Crono, whatcha gonna do? Things look bad for you, hey whatcha gonna do?
Brothers: Could you use a sex slave, you shorty bunch of Mystic Imps? Young, strong, not well behaved, going cheap....oh yeah, and he reads and writes!
Narrator: Then the Mystics galloped off with a slave in tow, off to Medina where Crono was not keen to go. It wouldn't be a picnic, he could tell.
Crono: And I don't speak Mystic very well!
Narrator: Crono's brothers tore his precious multicolored band. Having ripped it up, they next attacked a passing Roly. Soon the wretched creature was no more, they dipped the band in blood and guts and gore...oh now brothers, how low can you stoop? You make a horny troop, say, how low can you stoop? Poor poor Crono sold to be a slave. Situation's grave, hey, sold to be a slave. Poor poor Crono sold to be a slave. Situation's grave, hey, sold to be a slave. Sold to be a....slave....