PART TWO: Ginny's Decision
Sometimes I wonder if I'm the only one out there who sees the truth; the one that sees that life isn't pretty, and Utopia can never exist. Oh sure, we all have our fun sometimes, and there are moments when life seems perfect, but it's never actually there. I don't know what I'm trying to say, or why I'm even bothering. I guess I just feel like people need to realize how bad life can be. You're probably thinking, "She's so young. What can she possibly know about life?" Well, I know a lot more than one might think. It is impossibly difficult to be a sixteen-year-old girl, Witch or muggle.
Sometimes I wonder why life can be so unlivable. Sometimes I wonder why wonderful, perfect, happy people die before their time, while miserable, lost souls like me are forced to continue our existence as walking zombies. I am not alive in any sense of the word except the physical, and I cannot stand wandering the earth without a purpose or the ability to feel any of the things everyone else can feel. All I see is sorrow and pain. I understand nothing else. Oh, I smile, and I laugh at all the right moments, but that is simply an automatic reaction to whatever it is that is going on around me.
Sometimes it feels as though my life is a story, and I'm sitting back and reading instead of living it. I am sick and tired of feeling everything and nothing at the same time. I am sick and tired of being alive without feeling alive. It's time for me to write my own ending to this book.
Sometimes I think about hanging in and waiting to see if this really will pass like they all say it will. Then I realize that it won't, and that I'm always going to be miserable. So I am going to end it, and my only regret is that some people will be hurt by this. I never meant to hurt any of you, but I already have, so what is a little more pain?
Ron, you've always watched out for me, and I know you love me, even if you insist that I'm just annoying. I'm so sorry that I betrayed you. Please take care of yourself.
Bill, I miss you, and Charlie, too. You're the perfect older brothers and I know this will hit you both hard. I don't want you to think it's because you weren't around, because it's not. It's just that I can't handle things anymore.
Percy, Percy, Percy… I love you. Really, I do. You may be a pain in the bum sometimes, but you've always been so smart, and I really admire you for your dedication when you make up your mind to do something.
Fred and George, you two have always made me smile, and I love you for it. You're both amazingly funny and know how to find humor in anything. I hope you can use that after I'm gone to help the rest of the family. I love you both so much, you have no idea. Don't you dare cry for me!
Mum and Daddy… Oh Mum, Daddy… I'm so sorry. Please forgive me. I know this will hurt you both so much. Please don't be angry with me.
Harry, I've been in love with you since before I met you. I still love you, in a way. Please don't blame yourself, because this isn't your fault. You're my hero, Harry. I am so sorry I hurt you.
Hermione, you were there for me when I had no one else to talk to. You were my best friend, and you were the only one who understood me, even when I didn't understand myself. I'm so sorry I hurt you. I didn't mean to tell Mum what we were doing, and I really didn't mean to tell those lies, but I was desperate for an excuse, and I blurted it out. I wish I could take it back, but I can't. After that, you all stopped talking to me, and I was so alone. I felt so trapped and I had no one to talk to, and I just couldn't handle this on my own.
To whoever finds me, I'm sorry you had to make a rather gruesome discovery. Please try to put it out of your mind. Do a memory charm if it helps.
I've done a terrible thing and it can't be undone. The only way to fix it is for me to leave you all so you can move on with your lives. I'm so terribly lonely, and I don't believe that I can put this off any longer. There is no logical reason for me to remain here.
Okay, so there it is. I love you all. I'm sorry if I hurt any of you. Please forgive me.
Eternally,
Ginny Weasley
Minerva McGonagall shrieked when she entered the empty Gryffindor Common Room and discovered that young Ginny Weasley had slit her wrists. She attempted to revive the girl, but it was of no use. Ginny was dead.