Explaining the Thing #2
Disclaimer: I do not own anything Escaflowne related. I am just a silly Dilly obsessed fan. So don't sue me. I'm broke and have no money! Tikal is my own idea.
Chapter two, huh? Thanks for the reviews!
MINOR ALLEN BASHING
"Mwhahahaha!" laughed Dilly.
It was 3:00 AM and all the dragonslayers were bobbing around, not sleeping, even though they had another sex education class that same day.
"There once was a girl call Mary, who's legs were quite hairy. When she went to car, a man took her to a bar, and there she lived quite contrary!" screamed Guimel, jumping around.
Everyone laughed when Folken barged in, his hair all matted down. He was holding his teddy bear (with one eye, since Dilandau burned the other one) The teddy bear Mr. Monkey, and rubbed his eyes.
"Hiya, Folken! Want to make a poem too?" Viole asked. Folken looked at them and screamed, "God damn it! You little bastards get your asses to bed! You have Sex Ed. Tomorrow you morons!"
"Geez, Folken-sama, we're sorry." Muttered Dallet.
Everyone looked around and sunk into bed. Folken shut the door. It was silent for a while until.
"There was a man named Van. God, how I wished he would set off a bomb. With his gay ass hair and his clueless medievil wear, why can't a man like that burn?" ryhmed Dilly, happy for himself.
Folken opened the door, gave them a scary look and everyone went to bed.
When Dilly opened his eyes, his head was killing him. He was tired as hell when Folken's words came back to him.
"You have Sex Ed. Tomorrow you morns!"
At once, Dilly heard whispering.
"I had what?" muttered Shesta.
"Are you stupid?" hissed Miguel.
"I.what happened?" Shesta muttered.
"You had a wet dream!"
All the rest of the dragonslayers jumped out of bed and started laughing to Shesta.
"Hey!" Shesta screamed.
"What's a wet dream?" asked Guimel.
Everyone went silent, except for Dilly, who was about to speak up when-
"You'll all find that out in today's class!"
The door opened to show Tikal. Everyone yelped.
"Hurry! I want you in the classroom in ten minutes!"
They all sat down in their seats to see Tikal there, smiling.
"Helloooooo! And welcome back to another thrilling-"
"Not." Muttered Dallet.
"Ahem! Lesson in sex," Tikal shuffled some papers around, "I heard one of you had a wet dream. Well, I'll tell you all about them in today's lesson."
"Spare us the details." Viole cried.
Tikal looked at them, putting her hands on her hips, "I don't want another repeat of our last lesson."
Everyone went silent.
"Ok. Let us start about wet dreams."
"This is stupid. I already know what they are, baka." Replied Dilly, looking very sullen.
Tikal didn't listen, "Wet dreams are caused when a man thinks about-"
"In Shesta's case, another man!" cracked up Miguel.
"Miguel!" barked Tikal.
Miguel snorted and went silent. Tikal looked around the class.
"Perhaps." she muttered.
"What?" cried Gatti.
"Maybe you would understand wet dreams better if a man were to tell you." Tikal pointed out.
Everyone just looked at each other and Viole screamed.
"NOT DORNKIRK! PLEASE!"
"Shut up. No, as it. The man doesn't even know how to have sex. If it doesn't have the word fate in it, the man is lost." Tikal snapped.
Everyone giggled and threw paper balls at each other.
"I'll be right back." Tikal said and left.
"NO TEACHER!" cried Dilly and jumped up on his desk.
"Yea-haw! Cowboy!" cried Guimel, who started to dance.
Shesta was very quiet, still embrassed from the wet dream.
"Oh, Shesta, " murmered Dilandau, sitting next to him, and everyone wondered why he was being so nice, "It's OK."
"Thanks, Lord Dilandau." Shesta said and smiled.
"We always knew you were gay." Dilandau finished.
Everyone laughed and Tikal came back in with the male teacher.
Folken.
"Folken? He's going to tell us about wet dreams?" cried Miguel and was off his rocker.
"Shut up boys!" Tikal wailed.
Everyone did, except Shesta burst out crying.
"You're excused Shesta. You have five mintues." Whispered Tikal.
Folken shuffled his feet. Dallet snorted.
"He's going to teach us about wet dreams?" Dallet giggled.
"Shut up class. Folken will tell you all you need to know about wet dreams."
Folken cleared his throat and looked at all the dragonslayers.
"This is so stupid," Dilandau said, turning his head, "I already know about all this stuff. I don't need Folken, of all people, telling me it again."
"Hey, it's no picnic for me either." Folken replied hotly.
Dilly went silent and Folken rubbed his eyes.
"Ok.well.a wet dream.what it is.." He cleared his throat, "Ok, well, any questions?"
Gatti's hand went up in the air, "Pick me!"
"Gatti." Folken sighed.
"Ok.have you ever had a wet dream?"
Folken's face tinted a slight red color, "Keep the questions out of the personal range."
Of course, Dilly didn't listen. He hopped on his desk and cried, "Folken had a wet dream! Folken had a wet dream!" Soon the whole class was chanting it.
Folken sighed and brought out a picture, "Let's go over real men and not real men. This is not a real man."
Everyone screamed, "The horror! It's Allen! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
Gatti sighed, "Why does Allen always whip my ass?"
Everyone grinned.
Folken brought out another picture, "Here is a real man."
"It's you." Muttered Guimel, trying not to laugh.
"My point. Real men, have wet dreams. Real men such as me and Van-"
Dilly's eyes grew red in anger at the mention of Van's name.
"Don't speak of Van." Dilandau said, anger edged in his voice.
Folken shook his head and sighed, "I can't explain this. Ok, a wet dream. You have a sex dream and you shoot it everywhere. Got it?"
Everyone nodded and Tikal gasped, horrified at the way Folken had explained it.
"There you Tikal. Am I done now?" Folken asked.
Tikal nodded, her mouth open.
"Can we go now?" cried Viole.
Tikal gave another nod, her mouth still open. Dilly snickered.
"What'cha waiting for?" he asked, and everyone *except for Folken, who had quickly left.* laughed. Tikal looked up at Dilandau, "GET OUT YOU LITTLE POOPERS!"
"Hai." Everyone muttered.
"See you soon!" Tikal cried, cheerfully.
"She's crazy." muttered Miguel.
The End
So you little buggers want another chapter? REVIEW!
Disclaimer: I do not own anything Escaflowne related. I am just a silly Dilly obsessed fan. So don't sue me. I'm broke and have no money! Tikal is my own idea.
Chapter two, huh? Thanks for the reviews!
MINOR ALLEN BASHING
"Mwhahahaha!" laughed Dilly.
It was 3:00 AM and all the dragonslayers were bobbing around, not sleeping, even though they had another sex education class that same day.
"There once was a girl call Mary, who's legs were quite hairy. When she went to car, a man took her to a bar, and there she lived quite contrary!" screamed Guimel, jumping around.
Everyone laughed when Folken barged in, his hair all matted down. He was holding his teddy bear (with one eye, since Dilandau burned the other one) The teddy bear Mr. Monkey, and rubbed his eyes.
"Hiya, Folken! Want to make a poem too?" Viole asked. Folken looked at them and screamed, "God damn it! You little bastards get your asses to bed! You have Sex Ed. Tomorrow you morons!"
"Geez, Folken-sama, we're sorry." Muttered Dallet.
Everyone looked around and sunk into bed. Folken shut the door. It was silent for a while until.
"There was a man named Van. God, how I wished he would set off a bomb. With his gay ass hair and his clueless medievil wear, why can't a man like that burn?" ryhmed Dilly, happy for himself.
Folken opened the door, gave them a scary look and everyone went to bed.
When Dilly opened his eyes, his head was killing him. He was tired as hell when Folken's words came back to him.
"You have Sex Ed. Tomorrow you morns!"
At once, Dilly heard whispering.
"I had what?" muttered Shesta.
"Are you stupid?" hissed Miguel.
"I.what happened?" Shesta muttered.
"You had a wet dream!"
All the rest of the dragonslayers jumped out of bed and started laughing to Shesta.
"Hey!" Shesta screamed.
"What's a wet dream?" asked Guimel.
Everyone went silent, except for Dilly, who was about to speak up when-
"You'll all find that out in today's class!"
The door opened to show Tikal. Everyone yelped.
"Hurry! I want you in the classroom in ten minutes!"
They all sat down in their seats to see Tikal there, smiling.
"Helloooooo! And welcome back to another thrilling-"
"Not." Muttered Dallet.
"Ahem! Lesson in sex," Tikal shuffled some papers around, "I heard one of you had a wet dream. Well, I'll tell you all about them in today's lesson."
"Spare us the details." Viole cried.
Tikal looked at them, putting her hands on her hips, "I don't want another repeat of our last lesson."
Everyone went silent.
"Ok. Let us start about wet dreams."
"This is stupid. I already know what they are, baka." Replied Dilly, looking very sullen.
Tikal didn't listen, "Wet dreams are caused when a man thinks about-"
"In Shesta's case, another man!" cracked up Miguel.
"Miguel!" barked Tikal.
Miguel snorted and went silent. Tikal looked around the class.
"Perhaps." she muttered.
"What?" cried Gatti.
"Maybe you would understand wet dreams better if a man were to tell you." Tikal pointed out.
Everyone just looked at each other and Viole screamed.
"NOT DORNKIRK! PLEASE!"
"Shut up. No, as it. The man doesn't even know how to have sex. If it doesn't have the word fate in it, the man is lost." Tikal snapped.
Everyone giggled and threw paper balls at each other.
"I'll be right back." Tikal said and left.
"NO TEACHER!" cried Dilly and jumped up on his desk.
"Yea-haw! Cowboy!" cried Guimel, who started to dance.
Shesta was very quiet, still embrassed from the wet dream.
"Oh, Shesta, " murmered Dilandau, sitting next to him, and everyone wondered why he was being so nice, "It's OK."
"Thanks, Lord Dilandau." Shesta said and smiled.
"We always knew you were gay." Dilandau finished.
Everyone laughed and Tikal came back in with the male teacher.
Folken.
"Folken? He's going to tell us about wet dreams?" cried Miguel and was off his rocker.
"Shut up boys!" Tikal wailed.
Everyone did, except Shesta burst out crying.
"You're excused Shesta. You have five mintues." Whispered Tikal.
Folken shuffled his feet. Dallet snorted.
"He's going to teach us about wet dreams?" Dallet giggled.
"Shut up class. Folken will tell you all you need to know about wet dreams."
Folken cleared his throat and looked at all the dragonslayers.
"This is so stupid," Dilandau said, turning his head, "I already know about all this stuff. I don't need Folken, of all people, telling me it again."
"Hey, it's no picnic for me either." Folken replied hotly.
Dilly went silent and Folken rubbed his eyes.
"Ok.well.a wet dream.what it is.." He cleared his throat, "Ok, well, any questions?"
Gatti's hand went up in the air, "Pick me!"
"Gatti." Folken sighed.
"Ok.have you ever had a wet dream?"
Folken's face tinted a slight red color, "Keep the questions out of the personal range."
Of course, Dilly didn't listen. He hopped on his desk and cried, "Folken had a wet dream! Folken had a wet dream!" Soon the whole class was chanting it.
Folken sighed and brought out a picture, "Let's go over real men and not real men. This is not a real man."
Everyone screamed, "The horror! It's Allen! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
Gatti sighed, "Why does Allen always whip my ass?"
Everyone grinned.
Folken brought out another picture, "Here is a real man."
"It's you." Muttered Guimel, trying not to laugh.
"My point. Real men, have wet dreams. Real men such as me and Van-"
Dilly's eyes grew red in anger at the mention of Van's name.
"Don't speak of Van." Dilandau said, anger edged in his voice.
Folken shook his head and sighed, "I can't explain this. Ok, a wet dream. You have a sex dream and you shoot it everywhere. Got it?"
Everyone nodded and Tikal gasped, horrified at the way Folken had explained it.
"There you Tikal. Am I done now?" Folken asked.
Tikal nodded, her mouth open.
"Can we go now?" cried Viole.
Tikal gave another nod, her mouth still open. Dilly snickered.
"What'cha waiting for?" he asked, and everyone *except for Folken, who had quickly left.* laughed. Tikal looked up at Dilandau, "GET OUT YOU LITTLE POOPERS!"
"Hai." Everyone muttered.
"See you soon!" Tikal cried, cheerfully.
"She's crazy." muttered Miguel.
The End
So you little buggers want another chapter? REVIEW!