Setsunakutemo... Zutto- Prologue


by: Asurahime



Disclaimer: Star Ocean: The Second Story does not and never will belong to me, and the title of this fic is a song from the anime "Fushigi Yuugi", translating to something like: "Even though it's painful... always".


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A single flame can easily be put out, but what about a wildfire? The same as my emotions long ago... my sister... my parents.... now my emotions... have been killed after I have considered myself damned. Anger is like the flame, it comes and it goes... but guilt is like the wildfire.... it can only dissipate by burning itself out and it will take even longer to heal and repair the damage. I have forsaken all that I have loved, all that I have hated, all that meant anything to me.... to nothingness.


"Dias....."


"What is it Rena?" As always, the tall, blue-haired swordsman didn't waste any time and got to the point. "Why do you worry so much?"


Rena Lanford, unknowingly a Nedian raised on the planet Expel, approached the man as he muddled over his thoughts on the top of a sheer cliff. The sun was setting and the sky was colored with the shades of dusk, ranging from a blue the color of Rena's hair, to a red as deep as blood. The young Nedian found the sky a comfort after all of the days hardship from fighting and trying to forget her argument with Claude; but the older Expellian found nothing in the sky but the pain of having to live another day.


"Everyone is waiting for us, Dias. Tomorrow is the day we infiltrate the Heraldry Forest and you should rest." Rena turned to walk away, but Dias said something which stopped her in her tracks.


"You still haven't answered my question, Rena." Dias turned around to face her. Then he approached until he was a mere two feet away from her. "Why do you worry so much about me? Do you feel sympathy, or do you just do it because of what I used to be before the accident?"


Rena shook her head and turned back to him. "No, those aren't the only reasons why I worry about you more than anyone else. You have been pushing people away for so long that I am starting to think that you have forgotten how to live, Dias."


His gaze never wavered from her face as he faced the sky again. "I don't consider that an answer, Rena. You know yourself that I have killed my emotions long ago, ever since I lost my family, but you still refuse abandon me like everyone else. You even risked your friendship with Claude by arguing with him about me. Why?"


Looking up at the much taller man, Rena didn't flinch as she returned his gaze stare for stare. To Dias' surprise, Rena smiled at him and placed her hand in his. "I worry about you because I don't like seeing those people I love to isolate themselves from the rest of the world. I know what happened, Dias. I would never turn my back to you, I care about you too much. You have to live on for Cecille's sake, because she loves you. And so do I."


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".... because she loves you.... so do I..."


"...... How could someone love me?" Dias sat up on his bed late at night, contemplating on what Rena said a few hours ago. He looked at her, sleeping on the bed opposite his own with a sad smile on her face. His constant aloofness and carelessness about life is hurting her, and Dias knew it... but should she ever know the bitter truth, she would be hurt even worse. "....... I can't love her... or anyone."


Dias brushed his long blue hair away from his face-- a perpetual reminder of his past, for he never cut it ever since the incident-- and got out of bed. He walked towards the window and looked into a night so dark that even the stars refused to come out and shine. The full moon was his only companion, but its normally silver beams were as pale and cold as death. Opening the shutters, an icy wind whipped around Dias like the cold fingers of the dead, as if they were watching his every move to recount on all the terrible things he has witnessed.


"Father... Mother... Cecille.... why didn't I just follow you? Why was I spared? There is nothing else in this world which needs me. Everyone will be better off without me... especially Rena..." Dias turned back to look at the girl sleeping so innocently on her bed. Within her small frame is the flame of friendship and a determination to protect what she cares for. Who knew that so much love can be stored within such a small person? A rare smile brightened Dias' countenance as he looked at his 'little sister'. "I'll protect her..... and maybe in time... my heart would be able to heal itself..."





Preview of Chapter 1


Battle in the Heraldry Forest



"DIAS!! Watch out!!" Rena immediately released a healing spell in Dias' direction as the blade of Azamgil descended on her friend.


The blue-haired swordsman swung his sword up and blocked the downward sweep of the spear. Then he quickly cut a side-long arc with his longsword which severed the metal point of the spear off. Azamgil cursed as he tried to move away, but he got caught by Dias' sword.


Rena looked around to see if there was anything else which seemed threatening. Suddenly, her eyes widened when her gaze rested on several Shielders which were advancing. She knew that Dias was busy with the boss, so she immediately cast cast another spell. "RAY!!"



Chapter Notes:


*sigh* I do hope I know what I'm doing... I know that the prologue it short and it sucked *the chapters will be much longer in the future*, but I couldn't think of anything better fast enough, I was thinking too much about my Ildon x Asellus fic. I'm thinking of turning this into a Dias x Rena fic, since there aren't too many out there. I think that I have seen only a couple. This series would be pretty long I guess, but please forgive me in advance if I don't update as often as I can. Please, please comment also.


~Asurahime