Farewell Sweet Princess
FINALLY fanfition.nets running again! Took 'em long enough didn't it?
Well I thought it was funny when I first thought of this little series and hopefully no one takes this in a bad way.
Dedication: For all you Hobbes fans out there!
Reader: Alright everyone, I have here in my right hand the last Will & Testament of the late Diana, Princess of Wales. And the Will reads as follows.
Hobbes: Ar, hang on a sec, partner. What's the date on that Will?
Reader: The date on the Will sir is June '93.
Hobbes: Well, you better chuck it in the bin then bud. Cause I've got one here dated . . . JULY '93.
Reader: WHAT! Oh, oh I see. May I have the new Will please?
Hobbes: Sure, partner. Swap ya. ::Laughing as he says this:: You won't be needing that anymore. ::Folds paper and pockets it:: Have a crack at this one here.
Reader: I have here in my right hand the NEW last Will & Testament of the late Diana, Princess of Wales. And the Will reads as follows.
Unfolds the paper and reads.
Reader: I, Diana Spancer, do hereby declare that all of my worldly goods be given to Robert A. Hobbes.
Audience make shocked sounds.
Hobbes: Gee, we were close but . . . who'd thought.
Reader: I regard Bobby as a devilish stud-muffin.
Bobby: HERE!! HERE!!
Reader: Who has been a good friend to me over the many years that I have known him and I will always cherish the nights we spent together lying under the stars in our Jim-Jams giving each other tummy rubs.
Bobby: ::crying:: Those . . . were the most . . . beautiful . . . nights in my life.
Reader: Um . . . this Will will remain legal as long as Bobby agrees to spend the entire 52 million on Doughnuts, alcohol, top of the range tracky dacks and a cavalcade of busty strippers.
Bobby: ::crying:: WHHHHHHHHY? WHY? It just isn't fair!
Reader: And Bobby must not give away any of the money to any of his family or friends especially not to Claire, Alex or that weasel Darien.
Bobby: Oh and I really wanted to give it away to. Gee, thanks Di, whatever happened to sharing?
Reader: I further request that Bobby turn Kensington Palace into a throbbing Gym Palace populated by newbar wenches eager to please his every whim.
Bobby: Well, I spose not to otherwise would be the dishonour her memory. ::Cries::
Reader: It is also my solemn wish that the full amount of 52 million be stuffed down the front of Bobby's pants by Claudia Shiffer, thus completing the bequest.
Bobby: OH GOD!! That probably means that she's gonna have to touch my coolies! ::Cries::
Reader: This concludes my last Will & Testament.
Bobby stopes crying.
Bobby: Uh uh champ. I think there's a extra bit on the back.
The reader checks and sure enough there is.
Bobby goes back to crying.
Reader: Oh, yes, there is. Until the money is paid I would approached it if somebody here today could slim Bobby a couple of hundred bucks to tie him over until the weekend. Ta, Di
Bobby: ::Crying:: Please, say it's not true! ::Calmly:: Thanks bud.
FINALLY fanfition.nets running again! Took 'em long enough didn't it?
Well I thought it was funny when I first thought of this little series and hopefully no one takes this in a bad way.
Dedication: For all you Hobbes fans out there!
Reader: Alright everyone, I have here in my right hand the last Will & Testament of the late Diana, Princess of Wales. And the Will reads as follows.
Hobbes: Ar, hang on a sec, partner. What's the date on that Will?
Reader: The date on the Will sir is June '93.
Hobbes: Well, you better chuck it in the bin then bud. Cause I've got one here dated . . . JULY '93.
Reader: WHAT! Oh, oh I see. May I have the new Will please?
Hobbes: Sure, partner. Swap ya. ::Laughing as he says this:: You won't be needing that anymore. ::Folds paper and pockets it:: Have a crack at this one here.
Reader: I have here in my right hand the NEW last Will & Testament of the late Diana, Princess of Wales. And the Will reads as follows.
Unfolds the paper and reads.
Reader: I, Diana Spancer, do hereby declare that all of my worldly goods be given to Robert A. Hobbes.
Audience make shocked sounds.
Hobbes: Gee, we were close but . . . who'd thought.
Reader: I regard Bobby as a devilish stud-muffin.
Bobby: HERE!! HERE!!
Reader: Who has been a good friend to me over the many years that I have known him and I will always cherish the nights we spent together lying under the stars in our Jim-Jams giving each other tummy rubs.
Bobby: ::crying:: Those . . . were the most . . . beautiful . . . nights in my life.
Reader: Um . . . this Will will remain legal as long as Bobby agrees to spend the entire 52 million on Doughnuts, alcohol, top of the range tracky dacks and a cavalcade of busty strippers.
Bobby: ::crying:: WHHHHHHHHY? WHY? It just isn't fair!
Reader: And Bobby must not give away any of the money to any of his family or friends especially not to Claire, Alex or that weasel Darien.
Bobby: Oh and I really wanted to give it away to. Gee, thanks Di, whatever happened to sharing?
Reader: I further request that Bobby turn Kensington Palace into a throbbing Gym Palace populated by newbar wenches eager to please his every whim.
Bobby: Well, I spose not to otherwise would be the dishonour her memory. ::Cries::
Reader: It is also my solemn wish that the full amount of 52 million be stuffed down the front of Bobby's pants by Claudia Shiffer, thus completing the bequest.
Bobby: OH GOD!! That probably means that she's gonna have to touch my coolies! ::Cries::
Reader: This concludes my last Will & Testament.
Bobby stopes crying.
Bobby: Uh uh champ. I think there's a extra bit on the back.
The reader checks and sure enough there is.
Bobby goes back to crying.
Reader: Oh, yes, there is. Until the money is paid I would approached it if somebody here today could slim Bobby a couple of hundred bucks to tie him over until the weekend. Ta, Di
Bobby: ::Crying:: Please, say it's not true! ::Calmly:: Thanks bud.