I…you…big

By lizzyhold & firecracker

Disclaimer: We don't own any of characters in this story (We are so lame that we stole them all) Marvel owns the marvel chars (duh) and the rest own them selves. Hmmm think that's all we have to say… on with the story!


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"Please, he's in way too many titles as it is," Lisa argued with her friend Dominique. "I mean don't you really think that having a steady spot in two books and guest starting in a zillion others is enough? "

"No," she replied, "That just gives me more opportunities to stare at his fine-ass body."

"It's not even *that* fine, I mean, Gambit's ass is so much more cuter and you get enough looking-time in the titles that Logan's in because he basically stars in them. Even when he guest-stars, he still *stars* in them. If anything, Gambit should have another title because we don't get nearly enough ass-time in X-Treme, though the whole naked thing was nice, but even *that* was only in Destiny's mind," Lisa said. The two friends squabbled like this for a while—going on and on about who was finer than who, etc. Dominique had a comic book open in front of her. She'd been trying to read it, but Lisa *had* to keep interrupting her about Gambit. (Liz: Hey! I thought the idea was that you started the argument! Firecracker: It was but I decided to change it!)

Meanwhile, on the table…

"Dey jus' keep goin' on an' on, mon ami. It drivin' me crazy!!" Gambit said from the left panel.

"Yeah, yeah, Cajun. Shut yer trap. I'm tryin' ta figure out what the hell we're gonna do with these two," Wolverine replied.

"Maybe we pay dem a little lip service, non?" Gambit grinned. Wolverine liked this idea. Hell, that Dominique chick was one sexy little fox. (Liz: You are so bad! Firecracker: What? It *would* be nice, wouldn't it?)

Back in the real world…

The argument was quickly getting worse as the conversation moved from what books Wolverine and Gambit should be in to who had the nicer ass. They were about ready to lunge for each other's throats, when all of a sudden, two hands reached out of the comic books and latched on to them.

"Lisa!" Dominique choked. Lisa couldn't reply. She had a hand of her own to contend with. /I'm gonna die. I'm gonna die/, Dominique thought as she blacked out.

Lisa was aware of someone standing over her. Her eyes were closed and her head hurt very badly. She peeled her eyes open, but then shut them immediately against a bright white light. /Am I dead?/, she asked herself as she dared to open her eyes again. This time, a large, furry, blue face greeted her. "AAAAAAHHHHHHH!" she screamed, bolting upright into a sitting position. The furry man was obviously a little startled by her high- pitched screamed, but not completely surprised. "Who-who are you? Where am I? And what am I doing here?" she asked frantically. The blue man managed a toothy grin.

"I'm Dr. McCoy and you're at the Xavier Institute. As for what you are doing here, I could ask you the same," he replied.

"I'm-I'm where? At the *Institute*?" Her eyes widened. "Oh my gosh. Dominique! Where's Dominique?"

"Unh, shut up. I'm trying to sleep here," came the groan from the bed next to Lisa's.

"Dominique, wake up!!! You'll never guess where we are!"

"Shut up, Lisa. We're at your house, remember?"

"Nooo were not. Think of the absolute best place you could ever dream of being."

"Hugh Jackman's bed?" Dominique asked excitedly as she sat up quickly.

"No, even better!! The Xavier Institute!!!"

"Aw, that's not—wait. Xavier Institute? That means…ohhh man." Dr. McCoy stood by listening to the conversation, wondering what the heck was going on.

"I don't mean to interrupt your conversation, ladies, but would you mind explaining to me what you're doing here at the mansion?" he asked.

"You know as much as I do. We--" Dominique started, but Lisa cut her off.

"Give me just one moment with my friend. We'll be right back," she said as she pulled Dominique off to the side.

"What are you doing? This is the chance of a lifetime. If we tell 'em the truth about us being from another dimension where they're comic book characters, this could destroy any of our chances of you know…meeting our favorite X-Men. Don't you wanna score with Wolverine?" Lisa asked.

"Well, I do…but what the hell are we gonna tell them?" Dominique replied.

"Leave it to me. Leave it to me," Lisa said with a strange gleam in her eye. "Okay, we're done talking. Um, I'm um…um…Lisa, uh…Dominique what's my last name?"

"Marvela. We're the Marvela sisters," Dominique said quickly. (Fire: You made me say 'Marvela'? Liz: Shh! It's *Marvel* comics! Firecracker: Ohhhhh, I get it.)

"You don't look like sisters," the blue fuzzy man said suspiciously.

"Well that's because my biological dad split on me and my mom when I was just a baby, and then mom went out with this other guy and got pregnant, that's where Lisa comes in. She's kind of um…an accident," she said. Lisa elbowed Dominique sharply in the ribs.

"We're um, new students here. Uh…we…uh…got invited because of uh…our powers," Lisa said. "Yeah, that's it."

"Then why were you guys passed out in the middle of the hall?"

"We let ourselves in and got lost?" Dominique offered weakly.

"Okay, then what's your mutant powers?"

"Uh. I can do this," Dominique said, lifting her leg above her head.

"Dominique?" Lisa asked.

"What?"

"You're leg…it isn't attached to the rest of your body anymore." Dominique looked over at her leg, and then down at her hip. Lisa was right. It was detached.

"Cool! Hey, I can have a helluva lotta fun with this at Halloween!" Dominique squealed.

"Okay, I wonder what I can do…I mean, I can uh…oh god!! That's so gross!! Why the heck do people do *that* on the phone!!" Lisa exclaimed. "Oh cool! I can channel information over the phone lines. Dude, I could so totally work for the CIA." The furry man looked at the two girls, cocking an eyebrow.

"Maybe I should take you two to the Professor," he said.

"That would be so sweet!! Do you think that on the way there you could point out the rooms of a certain Canadian and another Cajun?" Dominique asked slyly.

"No, I think I'll just take you to the Professor." The girls shrugged.

"Well, we tried," Lisa said. They followed the man silently down the hall that led to the Professor's office, their eyes taking in every detail of the large grounds. They were just starting to chat about how much bigger it was when a loud thought interrupted them.

/I hope you ladies don't mind if I break up this conversation/ The girls looked up to see none other than Professor Xavier, the founder of the X- Men, the group that their absolute favorite comic-hotties were members of.

"Dr. McCoy tells me that you're new students here," Xavier said.

"Uh, yeah, I'm sure you got our letters, didn't you?" Lisa asked.

"Indeed," he replied, giving both of the girls 'the look.' "I understand your situation completely. We'll get you settled in immediately." There was a short pause. A knock on the door announced the arrival of someone. "Come in," Professor called. Scott Summers and Jean Grey came in the door.

"Oh god," Lisa moaned. "Not Mr. And Mrs. Stiff."

"Girls, this is Jean Grey and Scott Summers. They will be showing you around the mansion. Scott, Jean, this is Lisa and Dominique. They are our newest students," Professor introduced.

"Hi," Lisa said dully. Dominique detached her arm and waved it at the couple, eliciting a shocked expression from Scott. (Firecracker: Heh heh heh.)

"Stop it, Scott," Jean said, thumping him in the chest. Dominique made a cracking-whip sound and grinned evilly.

The tour was long and boring. Scott was leading (of course). It seemed that most of the team was out on a mission, including those two very fine pieces of ass known as Logan and Remy. The most eventful part of the tour was when Dominique asked Jean why she was with Scott when that fine pile of metal and flesh was falling all over himself for her.

"How did you know about th—I mean, what are you talking about?" Jean asked.

"Uh…my power, the phone line thing. Stupid internet. Heh heh heh," Lisa covered. The tour ended when the two girls were shown to their big, luxurious room. Xavier sure knew how to decorate.

"Okay, we're here. Now what the hell are we going to do?" Dominique demanded once the door shut.

"We sit back and enjoy every minute of it," Lisa said, stretching out luxuriously on her bed.

"That's it? That was your plan? I want some mushu!" Dominique huffed, crossing her arms over her chest.

"We're here aren't we? What more could you possibly want?"

"I want some MUSHU!"

"You're gonna hafta be patient. Besides, Logan isn't that hard to excite, you know."

"I can't argue with you on that one. But what are we going to do until those fine asses get back?"

"Hmm. Internet anyone?"

~*~*~*~

What well happen to our beautiful your heroines? Will they ever meet their comic idols? How will they react? Can our guts take any more of this torture?

Well why don't you read the next chapter and find out!