Splintered Dreams
by: Cat Skyfire and Yuuki Miyaka
Chapter Two
She moved silently about the cave, checking on her leathers to find they were still slightly damp and rather cold. She put them on anyway, vowing to ignore the discomfort. She had other things to worry about.
She didn't want to hunt this morning, didn't feel particularly hungry, despite the fact that she had barely eaten in the previous two days. Standing pensively at the mouth of the cave, she stared off into the dripping forest. At least the storm had stopped finally.
Stormseer stirred. He felt a chill he didn't like. Was he back in the white-cold? Was it happening again? He sat up with a start, looking around, as if he were trying to figure out where he was.
He stood, moving slowly in his temporarily confused state. He saw Ebony at the cave entrance, and remembered. He'd slept. A smile tweaked at the corners of his lips. He'd slept. The chill he'd felt must have been her leaving his side. He hoped to have her against him again, even if it led only to sleep.
He stepped up behind her, looking into the damp. "The game should be out now...best time to hunt them, before it rains again."
She jumped slightly at the sound of his voice, then steeled herself. Without looking at him once, she said, "I'm not particularly hungry, so I wasn't planning to hunt."
"...You could use some meat on your bones." When she scowled, he continued. "You don't look like you eat enough...."
That earned him a look of annoyance. "I do as I see fit." She moved away from the mouth of the cave, away from him. "I am as I am." Her raised eyebrow spoke volumes.
"Maybe I'll bring you a ravvit..." He started to walk to the back of the cave, then uttered a curse and dropped down.
Immediately, she was beside him. "What's wrong?!" Her tone, so recently irritated, changed to one of fear and compassion.
"The ankle..." He moved to look at it, pulling off the bandages slowly, and sucked his breath in over his teeth. Purple and swollen, it had only permitted a few steps before it had reminded him, sharply, that it was far from well.
She took hold of his ankle gently, once again exploring it as gently as she could. When she was done, she looked up at him. "Well, you're not going anywhere today. Or tomorrow for that matter. Not if you want to feel anything other than pain, that is." She grimaced. "I guess this means I'll have to do your hunting for you."
He tried not to wince as she explored the injury. It had swollen more than she'd expected...more than he had as well, if he was honest. "Sorry." He sounded genuinely apologetic. "You want my wolf to help scent?"
Her gaze spoke of wounded pride. "I'm a perfectly good huntress, thank you. You stay here. I'll be back in a bit." With that she slipped silently out of the cave, into the wet forest beyond.
"I'm sure you are...but he likes hunting, and is a little unhappy when he's left behind."
Her parting shot was said over her shoulder. "Then let him fend for himself. I don't want him around."
He sighed. She had barely left the cave when he called out "Thief!"
Once out in the forest, she tried to calm the turmoil in her mind. But his word caught her attention, and she turned back. "What?!"
The wolf came barreling out of the cave, jumping near her in excited glee.Finally grunting in annoyance and disgust, she threw up her hands, turning to walk away into the forest. She hated him. She did. Truly. But . . .
The wolf followed her, dancing around her even as she tried to ignore it. Tongue lolling, it was the picture of wolfish happiness.
If she had hated him so completely, then why had his touch last night and this morning touched her on such a deep level? Was it just because she had lost all connection to her tribe? Or was it something more?
After long moments, she finally took notice of the wolf dancing around her, and snarled at him. It was an obvious Challenge.The wolf cocked its head at her, confused. It wagged its bushy tail a bit more.Her snarl gave way to a full-out Challenge, complete with showing teeth. She Sent to the wolf a single thought. ::Leave!::
The wolf cocked its head to the other side, wagged its tail once, then stilled a moment. Just when she'd thought it had understood, it leaped up, and tried to lick her face.She gripped its throat, Sending at it once more. ::LEAVE!::
The beast gave a slight whimper at the pressure on its throat, but tried to lick her a second time.She tightened the grip minutely. And this time she Sent a growl into it's mind.
A third time, its tongue snaked out, making contact with her left cheek.At that, she threw it away from her, stalking off. But as she did, she Sent to Stormseer. ::Your wolf doesn't seem to understand a Challenge. I suggest you call him off of me before I hurt him.:: The Sending was as cold as their first meeting.
There was no sending response from Stormseer. The wolf continued to try to follow her.She swung herself up into the tops of the trees, slipping through the branches as silently and gracefully as a squirrel. And she wished for Blackbriar again.
She could sense the wolf beneath her. Was the fool thing trying to follow her still?
Finally growing sick of the game of wolf and ravvit she was playing with the foolish beast, she fired an arrow at it, deliberately missing all but the very tip of it's tail. Nothing was hurt save a tuft of hair.
The wolf gave a whine, but still gamely tried to wag its tail. It picked up the arrow in its teeth, and looked around, as if it wished to return the thing.
A snarl of sheer anger slipped out, and she did her best to quickly find the trail of a bird or two. Once done, she slipped through the treetops back to the cave, where she jumped down, landing gracefully at the mouth.The wolf met her there, arrow held gently in its jaws, looking up at her as if it had done a good thing.She grabbed the arrow, and stalked into the cave. Once inside, she snarled a Challenge at the elf, since the wolf did not seem to understand.
Stormseer sat in the cave, his back against the stone, a slight pained grimace on his face."I suggest you keep your wolf away from me. I will not be so patient next time."
He looked up, confused. "...What?"She flung the bird carcasses at his feet."...Why are you so angry?"
"Keep your wolf away from me," she growled lowly. "Or High Ones help me, I will truly Challenge him. And I'll win."
"What'd Thief do?"
"Keep him away. Am I clear?" Her voice was dangerously soft.
"I'm not sure I can." He glanced away, as if deferring to her Challenge.
She stalked up to him, snarling openly in his face. "Do it."
"I'm serious...I...can't send to him..."He stared at the wall, not ready to look at Ebony just yet."He barely responds to voice commands... ...I...I'm sorry..."
For a moment, she stopped in surprise. Then she rallied. "Then find another way. But I don't want him around me. Period. Clear?" Her nose wrinkled in disgust, and she turned away abruptly. "He'll learn."
Stormseer sighed, bending his head into his hands. Since just after she'd left the cave, his head had been hurting. He lifted it for a moment. "...Did you try to send?"
She stalked back to the edge of the cave, staring out into the forest beyond. And only then did she allow the tears to slip free. They were silent tears, and as she answered, they went unnoticed in her voice. "Of course I did. I told you to keep you fool wolf away from me."
The wolf gave a slight whine, moving to stand near her.She growled lowly at it, again showing teeth. If it didn't understand commands or Challenges, it was going to learn.The wolf just sat, looking up at her.
The elf said only, "...I...can't receive sends right now... they just hurt."
"What are you talking about? Anyone can Send."
"I..." She could hear the hesitation in his voice. It was hurting him to tell. "...I...it's been blocked..."
That brought her face around, and he could see the tears in her eyes and on her cheeks. But she paid no attention to them, instead staring at him in surprise. "Why?"
With effort, Stormseer stood and hobbled towards her, balancing himself with a hand on the cave wall. "What's wrong?" He looked only at the tears.
"I asked you a question," she said, ignoring his. "Answer me."
"...It was a punishment... What's wrong?" He gently lifted his thumb to wipe some of the tears on her left cheek.
"For?" She pulled away from his hand, her eyes never leaving his.
"...For... disobeying an order of my Chief..."
"And what order was that?"
"...I don't know if it matters..."
"Tell me," Ebony demanded.
"...why?" He wondered if she felt the tension in the air.She snarled at him slightly, not saying anything. She had spoken once. That should be enough."I...refused to back off of a hunt when ordered."
Her snarl continued for a moment at his answer, then she turned away. "Your chief is a fool."
"Why do you say that?"
"Yell, scream, Challenge, butneverinhibit a hunter. Times could change in a moment, and that hunter could be needed." After a moment, she turned back to him, placing a hand on his cheek. It seemed a gentle, loving caress for a moment, until he felt the beginnings of pain where she tried to probe the block.He tried to pull back from the searing touch.
"Punishment or not, the Sendings are needed. Let me in." Though her voice was gruff, the touch of her hand on his cheek was exquisitely gentle.
He swallowed. The touch on his cheek was soft, but the burning in his head hurt. He tried again to move back.Suddenly finding the block, she slipped under it. Thanks to Longbranch, she knew how to remove involuntary blocks. This one, though voluntary, wasn't much different. It took some skill, and much energy, but soon enough, it was gone.
She knew that the block had been placed by a skilled individual. Her own skill slipped it out easily enough, but she sensed that it might have even touched his soul name.
Once it was gone, she knew that the places in his mind were still raw. Going back in as gently as she could, she used her mental touch as a sort of buffer/tonic for the mental wounds. As her mind caressed his, she stopped noticing anything around her, including the fact that she had stepped up to him until her body was flush against his, an attempt to extend the comfort and strength of her own mind.
She didn't feel Stormseer's arms encircle her. She could feel the many raw spots in his mind. More than she'd expected.Her own arms went unconsciously around him as well, and the touch of mind on mind, very nearly soul on soul healed as it changed.
She felt a name brush against her consciousness. Seeking.They were caught again in that magic that had first surprised them. The magic of the night before, the magic that had captivated Ebony so much that she had forgotten her own tribe for a moment. Her awareness moved slightly toward the questing name, no longer thinking but merely feeling.
::Ryel….::
And she realized. Belatedly, coming out of the magic of the spell, she tried to deny it. "No. Please, no," she whispered, even as her mind withdrew from his. Stormseer could feel terrible pain and fear from her, pain and fear that left her a shivering mass on the floor.
His arms tightened around her, not wanting to lose her or the closeness that had been there but a moment ago. He knelt with her.
"Don't let this happen." She turned blind eyes up to him, tears marring her cheeks once more.
"Don't...let what happen?" His voice was soft, as he brushed his cheek against her tears.She sucked in a gasp at his touch, needing it as dearly as her own breath.
"Don't . . . leave me."
"I won't...why would I…?" He held her close, brushing his lips against the dampness. Tasting her tears.Her breathing became more and more ragged, and she reached up blindly to hold him close to her. She needed to feel him holding her, needed to feel touch, anyone's touch,histouch. And she opened her mind to his, allowing him to see her failure and the loss of her tribe. Everything. Even allowing him to see that he was holding a monster.
***I'm here.*** The sending was tender. He was not judging, just accepting. His arms tightened around her, as if he thought he could take away the pain with his own body heat.
::R-Ryel?:: She tested the name, tasted it within herself.
His own breathing became ragged, as he heard a name that had last been used to hurt him. ***I'm here...for you.***
She shivered. ::You'll leave. Just like the others.::
She felt him shake his head. ***No.***
::I . . . need you, Ryel.::She felt his hand touch the scarred side of her face, tenderly.She flinched away from the touch, afraid. He wouldn't care about her, wouldn't help her if she wasn't perfect.
He could see the thought within her, could feel the fear behind it.The hand moved to follow, resting against the ruined cheek, tenderly. Not enough to hurt, just resting. ***You are perfect.***
He could feel confusion, could see the shock. ::Aiyla.::
He gasped. ***Aiyla...***
She buried her face in the crook of his neck, shaking violently. ::Yes?::
His arms were tight around her, as if he feared she'd vanish if he let go. ***Aiyla...*** The name was a caress.
Her lips touched his throat, delicate as a butterfly. She couldn't stop the fear, couldn't seem to stop touching him. ::Help me, Ryel. Please . . .:: Her hands slipped under his tunic, resting lightly against bare skin.
His head tilted back, a wolf's surrender, as a gasp slipped from him.
::Need you . . . ::
He reached, needing to get past her leathers. He was filled with a raw hunger that threatened to drown him.
And she was pushing the tunic away. Touching him. Exploring what she had been so frightened of before.His body radiated an inviting heat. He tugged at her tunic, pleased when she let it slide from her willingly. He nuzzled the flesh, reveling in her scent.
Skin against skin. Mind against mind. Soul against soul. There was nothing they did not feel from either themselves or each other. And the pleasure grew, expanded, mingled until Ebony could not tell where her feeling ended and his began. They were one, not two, with one heart and one mind. They had no beginning, had no ending. They simply were, simply existed in this timeless moment of mutual need and want, of passion and love. And with that realization came a sense of peacefulness, of completion for Ebony. And Stormseer could feel this as well.
Stormseer felt himself drifting. He felt only nameless contentment, without a thought for the next day, or the next moment. ***Aiyla.…*** He let the name float in his mind, as he gave a peaceful sigh.
She nuzzled him, curled up against his side. ::Why, Ryel?::
His arm encircled her protectively and possessively. ***Why...what?***
She smiled at the gesture. ::Why give me your Name?::
***...You needed it.***
::It doesn't frighten you?::
***Should it?***
"You hardly know me," she whispered, trying to deny the truth.
***I hardly -knew- you...***
::And now?::
***...You've shared a lot.***
Did she love him? She wasn't sure. But she knew she needed him. ::Do you think you could love me?:: The thought was fearful. ::Not now, of course. But when we've shared more?::
***Of course.*** There was a pause. ***Why do you think I wouldn't?***
She nestled her face in his chest, choosing not to answer. ::I need you, Ryel.:: She, who had said only the day before that she needed no one, was finally admitting the truth.
She felt him grow still a moment. ***...You have my Name... Did you look deeper into my own soul?***
She shook her head mutely. ::You didn't ask me to.::
He hesitated a moment then asked, "...look deeper...you may want to run yourself."
She did as he asked.He guided her to his more recent memories. She saw the hunt, angry elves, a dead wolf. The prey...a human. Stormseer shaking his head, refusing the hunt. The Chief, side-whiskers to his belt, cracking Stormseer across the face. Stormseer falling before his father. Rising, refusing again. Beaten down again. Dazed, he sees his mother. Hears his father's command. Feels the power of sending stripped from him. Cast out. Last words - Useless.
Stormseer waited for Ebony to react, afraid.
Her vision clouded over for a brief moment, and she pulled away from him, rising and walking deliberately to the mouth of the cave. Her breathing was ragged, yet rigidly controlled.
He stayed silent, wanting her to say something, fearful of asking.
Her hands curled into fists so hard that her nails cut her palms, and droplets of blood slipped through her fingers. She was shaking. Her body was so tense that if she had been aware of anything other than the soul-deep rage she felt, she would have been in pain.
He rose slowly, approaching cautiously. Softly, he said, "They never asked why."
Striving to control her anger, she whispered, "Why?"
"...Shesaved my life from her kin. And she carried cub..."
Ebony nodded shortly. Her vision slowly, ever so slowly, began to clear of the red she saw. She continued to stare out of the mouth of the cave, still enraged beyond anything she had ever known. Not even her mother's death had caused this much anger within her.
"I...couldn't," he said, lamely trying to explain. "She had slain the wolf...but in defense of her cub... For that reason alone, she did not deserve death by hunting... Had they afforded her combat...maybe... But I owed her... I couldn't stop them, but I didn't have to help."
"For this, I may just hurt an elf." They were the first words she had spoken since he had begun to talk.
He blinked, and stepped back slightly. "I'm sorry..."
"Where is he?" She turned to Stormseer, still not seeing completely clearly.
"He?" His voice showed the bewilderment he felt.
"The elf who did this to you."
"Did what...?"
"Your chief," she snarled. "Your father."
"...He's at the Holt, of course... I don't understand..."
She pulled her knife out. "And would you like him sliced lengthwise or widthwise?"
"Why would you want to hurt him? I'm the one who disobeyed..."
Those words penetrated the fog of her rage, dampening it. ::Ryel . . .:: she Sent caressingly. ::Beloved . . . He is the one who should pay, not you.::
The Send was a balm on his fear of losing her so soon after finding her. ***Why should he pay? What did he do wrong?*** He stepped nearer, away from the knife-side.
::You did nothing worthy of out-casting.:: For a moment, she closed her eyes, remembering her own shame. And then she quickly opened them. ::That alone is worth it. But for him to use your soulname against you, to block you from your rightful gifts? He will pay, beloved.::
"I disobeyed him... Nor was it the first time..."
Now that the rage was gone, determination took its place, steeling her intentions. ::There are no lies in Sending, Ryel.::
***I don't want him hurt...***
She stared at him for a long moment. The anger, the rage, was still there, burning deep within her soul. She wanted to hurt this one who had hurt Stormseer. And then her chin tilted upward. She was showing throat.
Stormseer felt relief flood through him. He gently brushed his lips against her throat, accepting her choice.
She felt his lips, and gasped softly. And suddenly she realized what she had called him. In Sending. ::Beloved.::
"Thank you," he murmured, straightening. He looked at this face of this strange elf he'd only met the day before. Her face seemed to echo her nature. Gentle one moment, harsh the next. He smiled. Together, her face and her nature were beautiful.
She loved him. How could she? She had met him only the day before . . . But her soul answered her question for her. He had saved her. He had cared for her, and had continued to do so even when she desperately tried to push him away. He had trusted her with his soulname, asking nothing in return. And she had felt the bond before it had been cemented by the gift of her own soulname.
He felt an awkwardness grow in the silence, as if he should be doing more than admiring her. He waited, unsure.
And just as she knew that she loved him, she knew that she could not ask for the same. It was not right. Love was not requested. It was given freely, or not given at all.
"...Ebony? Is something wrong?"
And she had to give her love freely. ::I love you.::
He blinked. When he'd broken the silence, he hadn't expected that. "I.…" His mind whirled. She loved him? She'd only just met him...
She pressed a finger to his lips. "Don't."
"Don't?" The word came out. He tried to comprehend.
"It's too soon."
"For?"
"For you to return my love. If you ever would. I'm not asking you to."
"...Why...how do you know...I mean.…" He stammered, and took a breath. "...You only just met me..."
"I can feel the bond. I just . . . know."
He glanced out the cave entrance, trying to understand what was happening. "...Does this mean..." he began.
Her hand came up, touching his cheek gently before she turned away. "Does this mean what?"
"That you'll stop being angry with my wolf?"
A gasp of laughter left her, and she looked back at him. "I don't know. It still hurts to see him."
"...Why?"
She showed him everything about that day. Showed him Warbler's disappearance into the fire, and her own out-casting. And she showed him her last glimpse of Blackbriar, her own wolf-friend, as she stood beyond the fire, before she had turned fully into the inferno.
He gently pulled her close, drawing her away from the chill of the cave entrance. "...I'm sorry. Is he...gone...?"
"I don't know." She sighed, looking down. "I broke the bond."
He gently maneuvered her to the furs by the fire, drawing her down to sit. "...Broke the bond? How?"
"I . . . can't explain. It's different from blocking it. It's more painful. It's like ripping your own arm off. It can be done, but you have to have sufficient reason to, or you'll never have the courage to face the pain."
"But...once a wolf-friend, always...I didn't know Wolfriders could break the bond..."
"I wouldn't recommend it," she said wryly, denying herself the luxury of wallowing in the pain.
"I'm sorry you lost him." He was sincere.
"He was my first wolf-friend." She laughed sadly. "And at this rate, he'll be my only wolf-friend. I don't want another."
"...why not?"
"I would fail him as I did Blackbriar and Warbler. As I will you."
"You won't fail me." He tightened his grip around her minutely.
She laughed again, this time in self-hatred. "Yes I will. I always do."
"No…. You won't." It was a statement.
"I failed my mother. I failed my student. I failed my lovemate. I failed my tribe. I failed my wolf-friend. There has never been a person I have not failed. It's inevitable."
"...Is there anything I can do to help prove that you won't fail?"
"No." She turned to face him. "Are you sure you still want me?"
"I haven't let you go so far..."
A smile broke through her worried expression. ::I love you, Ryel.::
"You're beautiful when you smile."
She blushed. ::You're always beautiful, beloved.:: And he was. Because of who he was. Her hands roamed over his chest, gently. They traced paths of invisible fire. She nuzzled his throat, smiling against it happily.
He felt a little ashamed at qualifying his statement. But he smiled to see her blush. As she began to touch him, "...Eager?"
Her blush deepened. ::Needing,:: she corrected gently. ::You're so different from me, so . . . good. Kind. Gentle. Caring.::
***Reckless, headstrong, disobedient, sarcastic...***
::No.::
***You would have agreed with me last night.***
::Not in Sending.::
***...What would you have said...last night...in Sending?***
She looked away. ::Nothing. I was not ready for the truth.::
***...And if you had been?***
::Protective. Exasperating. Loving. Irritating. Necessary.::
He smiled. ***Explain your need.***
::I can't.::
***At all?***
::I have no words.::
He looked at her a moment. ***Do you know how old you are?***
::Not precisely, though I should. But I have a guess.::
***How old?***
::30. 40. Somewhere in there.::
He let out a long laugh. "And you called me Cub???"
"You were acting like one, Ryel," she pointed out, though not unkindly. "Why?"
Still smiling, he replied, "Just curious..."
"What about you?"
"Hard to say...I think around 600. Over 500. My sire says face fur comes in at that point, and I've had it a good many eights..."
She smiled fondly at him, then nuzzled his neck.
"...What did you mean when you said you failed your lovemate?"
She opened her mind to him again, showing him Madcoil and her desperate flee to get away from the pain of the monster's Sending.
"Whatisthat thing?!"
"It was called Madcoil. It was born on a pocket of the High Ones' ancient magic gone sour. A melding of longtooth and snake. It had black skin and a blacker mind, a mind that enjoyed the death of others. Any death. I couldn't bear the pain. I ran. I was so frightened."
"Did others run?"
She continued her explanation without hearing him. "It was only after I came to my senses again, hidden up in a treetop, that I Sent for Crossbow. He never answered me."
"...He was your first?"
"Yes."
"I'm sorry you lost him."
"It's been a long time. And it can't be changed. But I can remember."
"...Was the creature slain?"
"Yes. By my chief. With the help of the tribe."
"Your chief was brave to go against such a ... creature."
"My chief knew that it was either that or let his tribe die. And he would never let his tribe die."
"A good Chief...." He fell silent, thinking about his father.
"Yes. He is." Stormseer could feel the tail-end of something at the edge of her mind.
"What are you thinking?"
"Just remembering my chief. Cutter . . . he was my brother in all but blood. I . . . miss him."
"...Will you ever try to go back...?"
"I don't know." She raked her hand through her dark curls, thinking. "They were the only family I had once my mother died. I will always miss them."
"I'm trying to go back to my Holt... that's why I'm on my quest."
"I don't understand."
"I thought if I was the first to find out where the cubs were vanishing to...I would be allowed back..."
Her gaze darkened. "You'll be allowed back in, no matter what. But you're right. We need to figure out where the cubs are disappearing to. They must need our help. But right now, you're no good to them. You need to mend." She smiled at him.
"What do you mean, I'll be allowed back in?"
She merely widened her smile and leaned over, nuzzling his chest. "Hold me, beloved?"
He pulled her close, resting his head on hers. He'd ask her about her intents later.
She moved against him, enticing certain reactions. And she smiled a wicked little smile.