Part 2 of 2: B.S. or Meeting and Aftermath

This was a far cry from what Frodo had expected. Therapeutic, my feet, he thought bitterly. Quick glances at his fellow hobbits told him that he was not the only one of that opinion. Since Legolas' problem was really not a problem and Aragorn seemed to have fallen apart, Frodo took it upon himself to save the honor of the Fellowship. He got up to the stand and found out that it was not quite made to match the hobbits' height standards. He chose to speak beside the stand.

"Hi, everybody. I am Frodo son of Drogo and I have a problem."

"Hello, Frog son of Dragon," the intellectually-challenged audience greeted. That explains the feet, the anonymous wise guy decided.

"My name is Frodo Baggins, but usually people just call me—"

"Let me guess!" the wise guy from the audience screamed. "Bigfoot?"

That did it. Legolas no longer hold back his murderous tendencies. He rose from his seat, and before anyone had even realized what had happened, he had caught the wise guy from his collar and removed him from the hall. Cries of terror could be heard from the outside, and then everything went quiet. A few moments later, Legolas returned, wiping something red from his hands with a cloth that resembled the shirt the wise guy had been wearing. "Rest in pieces," mumbled someone from the audience. Legolas turned his gaze at that daredevil, who obviously had a death wish. The little daredevil quickly became a very quiet little devil. Legolas spoke aloud:

"Is there anyone else here who would like to make comments on my friends?"

There was no answer.

"Very well. Please carry on, Frodo."

Legolas got back to Aragorn, who had returned to his senses when hearing someone mock the Ring-bearer. Now the ranger sat in his chair and felt the cold steel of the Andúril with his fingertips, a thoughtful expression on his face. Boromir had disappeared, and Legolas' keen ears detected noises of someone being sick outside the house. While Frodo kept on babbling about nearly every incident he had ever had with spiders, the rest of the Company engaged in a quiet conversation. Sam pulled Legolas from his sleeve.

"Legolas, sir, dare I ask, did you—" Sam sought for the right words, "—put that miserable excuse of a life form out of his misery?"

Legolas turned to him in surprise. "Nay, Sam. I took him to the tallest tree I could find. I gave him something to think about."

"I bet you did, Master Elf," said Gimli suddenly and laughed heartily. "I am glad we are on the same side."

"I have no doubt of that," replied Legolas pleasantly. Aragorn chuckled at his ambiguous statement.

"How did your hands, then—"Merry started.

"That is just red paint. Someone had painted red markings on the bloody tree."

Aragorn had been examining his sword silently, but now he finally spoke. "Thank you, Legolas."

"You are welcome, Estel."

"Do you think he'll ever get down?" Pippin asked. As if to answer Pippin's question, both the ranger and the elf's keen ears picked up a thump from the outside. The companions exchanged a look and Legolas answered:

"Undoubtedly."

The Company now turned their attention to Frodo, who had already been through his experiences with the spiders and was now telling the audience which particular characteristics he hated in the vile beasts.

"What I hate the most is the cunning way they attack you. You have no idea that they are approaching, for they are masters of swift movement. One minute they are on the other side of the room, and the next, they are all over you. When they get to you, they bind their long feet around you. It is the legs I hate the most; the way they fold around you and strangle you. Even their foul torso fails to cause such terrible revulsion in me. I know they in a way have a slim and—believe it or not—handsome figure, but even that cannot make up the lack of brains and the way they keep pestering me." Frodo halted to take a breath and noticed with a start that "Leggy" was standing next to him.

"Frodo, I think you should stop. I believe you have made your point," Legolas whispered.

"If you really think so. I think this is going well, though. Just look at the way these people pay attention to me. They barely even blink."

Legolas let his gaze wander in the audience. Almost everyone seemed to be on his or her toes. He also knew, as well as the audience, that it wasn't Frodo's less entertaining babbling that kept them so alert: it was the incessant babbler's Elven friend, who had a quick temper. "You have a very attentive audience, but I still think you had best hand over the turn to the next speaker." In a louder voice, Legolas addressed the public, "May we have support for my friend here?"

The hall burst out in furious ovation and occasional exclamations, "Well done, Frog son of Dragon!" Frodo was genuinely surprised at his sudden popularity, but he handled it with the dignity of a gentlehobbit. He bowed slightly and let Legolas guide him back to his seat. At this point, Boromir rejoined the company with a wary peer at Aragorn. Boromir looked slightly under the weather, but Aragorn was not about to let that hinder him. He grabbed Boromir from the shoulder, ignoring the sudden gasp, and threw him to the wolves.

"Start talking, Boromir," he hissed. The chair didn't have the guts to intervene, but she chose to hide in the darkest corner instead. It seemed that this company was unpleasantly unpredictable and, after what she had seen the Elf do, she was not about to take any chances with an emotionally-unbalanced man with a sword.

Boromir found himself between the rock and the hard place: he could not get away from the situation, but he was certainly not going to explain the cause for his anxiety. He came up with the first excuse he could think of and started talking:

"Hello, my name is Boromir."

"Hello, Boromir," replied the audience. Not believing his ears, Boromir wondered about the sudden improvement in the audience's hearing, but discovered the reason for it soon enough: next to him, Aragorn was running his fingertips over Andúril, time after time. Legolas had also got up and taken a position close to the stand as he eyed the bow in his hand thoughtfully. Both these actions were enough to rouse the interest, as well as instinct of self-protection, of the audience.

Boromir carried on telling about his newly-invented fear. "I have a problem. See, there is this One Ring—"

"Who's the poor girl?" the daredevil yelled. He was quickly silenced by Aragorn, who made an unseemly gesture and intensified his message by swinging the sword reforged in the air.

"As I was saying, this there is this One Ring that keeps tempting me. I fear the power it has over me, and yet I dare not take it since that kind of action would never be approved among my people."

"We're talking about a female, aren't we?" the daredevil with a death wish remarked. His wish was fulfilled when the snarling Aragorn and Legolas grabbed him by his shoulders and yanked him outside. All waited for their return in deafening silence. After a while, they came back without the little pest and returned to their positions. This was the last interruption during that evening, and Boromir made up some story about feeling awful temptation for the mighty Ring and how he struggled with its lure day after day.

His story didn't make any sense to the audience, but the Fellowship listened with interest and Aragorn finally felt at ease. To think that it was the Ring all along! I was sure it had something to do with me, he mused. The poor Gondorian had just tried to keep his distance so that he wouldn't pull others with him, should he fall. When Boromir was finished with his nonsensical story, Aragorn slapped him manfully on the shoulder and made a favorable observation about Boromir's fairness and courage. Boromir had absolutely no inkling what Aragorn was talking about, but he had no intention of finding out about it, either.

At this point, the chair stepped out of the shadows and announced that the interesting evening would have to end now and welcomed the audience to the next meeting. The new place and time would be announced privately to regular members. The next meeting would involve looking into the rules of the society, such as the problems accepted into discussion and the right to participate. The audience sighed and left the premises at the speed of a raging hurricane. The Company stayed behind to listen to Gimli and the three hobbits' indignant remarks that they had been ignored. The chair came to bid Aragorn goodbye or, as she hoped, a farewell for good for him and his.

"Thank you for joining our meeting. I trust you have solved your problems now and have no need to come back..." …ever.

"This has been a most interesting evening. I wonder about something, though: I was under the impression that the meeting would last at least twice as much."

"Well, see, this was such an extraordinary meeting that a bit shorter length was in order," …to save at least few members from resigning.

"We thank you. I am sure all of us feel much better now."

At least someone does. Then the chair's barely contained anger burst, and she couldn't refrain from asking a question with a definite sting in it: "Mr. Arag'horn, before you leave, may I ask what your problem was? You never quite had a chance to tell." Let's see how that outside calm of yours holds now.

Legolas intervened and grabbed Aragorn's sword that had dangerously began to rise and chased the ranger out of the front door. He came back and urged the others to leave as well, with a promise to quickly follow after. Once the hall was empty and empty of witnesses, he fixated on the chair's. Seeing the Elf's shining eyes, she stepped back and gulped. This meeting is Men-only from on, she decided. Legolas waited. scrutinizing the woman with his eyes. When he decided the woman had suffered enough he spoke in a low and deceptively sweet tone, "I heard what you just said to my friend and saw how it affected him. I know you acted on purpose."

"You have misunderstood me. I would never—" The woman was hissed to silence. She took a step back.

"I believe it is customary to make amends after one has insulted another. Do you agree?"

A gulp and a nod comfirmed that they were of the same mind.

"Good. Do you have insect powder?"

"Wh— what?" As Legolas' eyes narrowed, the woman nodded in agreement.

"Good. Put the powder, combs, and a toothbrush into a bag and bring it to me. Do not argue with me; I am positive that you have combs and a simple toothbrush in this place."

The dazed chair swayed on her feet before finding a bag and filling it up as requested. The bag was brought to Legolas, who thanked with a slight bow and left the building. The chair sat down and thanked the high ones for the pointy-eared devil sparing her life.

When Legolas came outside, the Company looked up expectantly and Aragorn asked on everybody's behalf:

"Well?"

Legolas threw the bag at Gimli and answered, "She was genuinely sorry for the thoughtless comments. She gave a little something as an apology to Gimli and Sam, who had not the chance to speak tonight."

The aforementioned dwarf and hobbit's spirits rose considerably when they looked into the bag. Gimli was so overjoyed that he thanked the Elf with genuine warmth. Legolas just smiled in his elf-like manner and mouthed to Aragorn's questioning glance, "Unharmed." The Fellowship spoke quickly and decided unanimously to resume their original quest. Pippin and Merry calmed down after Strider noted that they would probably have a few easy weeks coming. They started to set off on their way but before they left, Merry felt daring enough to ask:

"Strider, Legolas, what did you do with that man who kept interrupting?"

Aragorn and Legolas exchanged a glance, and Legolas answered, "He needed cool air, so we threw him right over that cliff there." The hobbits looked shocked, and Legolas added hastily, "There is a lake down there."

"I didn't know that."

Luckily, only Legolas heard Aragorn's quiet growl.

The Fellowship set course to Lothlórien. They did not have to take too many strides before they noticed a young man lying under a tree. The young man had obviously fallen down a good fifty feet; there was nothing they good do for him. Legolas had the grace to look ashamed, but Frodo showed that the man did not have his sympathy:

"Serves him right. Maybe we should check his pockets, in case he has any valuables."

"Mr. Frodo! That would be grave robbery!" exclaimed Sam, shocked at the thought.

"He doesn't," replied Boromir absently. The whole Fellowship turned to stare at him. Boromir corrected hastily, "He does not seem like a man carrying valuables." Needless to say, the others were a bit distrustful at the truthfulness of the statement since the Gondorian had been outdoors for quite a while, all alone. Unwilling to push the matter any further the Fellowship continued on its way, Aragorn in the lead and Boromir being the hindmost for some strange reason known only to Boromir himself.

THE END

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