"99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer."
"Sirius?"
"Yes, James?"
"Shut up. We have to figure out how to get out of here."
"I'm sure someone will find our dead and shrunken bodies sooner or later."
"Lets not be too cynical, shall we?"
"Remus, do you remember where we are?"
"Yes. In a pitch black room with no plan to get out."
"Exactly. Its kind of hard not to be cynical when you're trapped in a darkened room with only three people to keep you company."
"Are you saying we're boring?"
"No, of course he isn't, Peter. Are you?"
"No, no. Of course not."
"At least Snape isn't in here."
"Yes I am, you wankers."
"Snape!"
"I thought we covered that already?"
"Oh, this is fun."
"Shut up, James."
"You shut up."
"Guys! Can we please try not to fight?"
"Sorry, Remy."
"He started it."
"Who started it, Sirius, James?"
"No, Snape."
"I most certainly did not!"
"Well, if you weren't here we wouldn't have argued."
"Stop picking on each other. It gets annoying after a while."
"As annoying as Snape?"
"Can I borrow someone's wand to set fire to this git?"
"Er. I don't have my wand."
"Why don't you have your wand?"
"McGonagall has it. She's testing it for some kind of malfunction."
"Yes, but that's not the only reason you're failing Transfiguration, Charms, and Potions, now is it, Potter?"
"Shut up, Snape."
"Will you guys please stop fighting?
"We need to get out of here!"
"We know that, Peter."
"Well let's do something about it!"
"Er. You see."
"Spit it out, Pettigrew."
"I left my wand in the dorms."
"Peter!"
"I'm sorry, Remus. I just forgot."
"But you're never supposed leave your wand!"
"I know. I'm really sorry."
"It's okay, Remus. He just forgot."
"You mean the great rat can't even remember his own wand? He was probably going down to the kitchens, weren't you?"
"I was not!"
"Sure. How about you, Lupin? Are you an idiot like them, too?"
"I had my wand when we came in here, but I dropped it when Siri bumped into me."
"Damn it."
"Well, we'll just have to feel around for it, then."
"You mean none of you have your wands?"
"No."
"Not really."
"Nada."
"Sorry."
"Well, I don't have mine either. So if Potters plan it the best we've got, I suggest you get moving."
"You too, Snape."
"Of course. Do you really believe I think getting my hands dirty is beneath me?"
"Well. yeah."
"Black, Black, Black. It's a pity you're so stupid."
"I am not!"
"Guys! Lets try to look for Remy's wand!"
"Fine."
"Ow!"
"Bloody hell, Potter! Watch where you're going!"
"I can't see, you dolt!"
"So you can't use your ears?"
"Both of you shut up, and keep looking."
"Damn it! I just ran into a wall!"
"Be careful, Peter- crap! I just ran into someone."
"You ran into me, Siri."
"Oh. Sorry Remus."
"Ow! Someone just hit me in the shin!"
"Whoops."
"Stop laughing, Black. You too, Lupin."
"This isn't work- Aah! Damn it, that hurt, Remus!"
"Oh my. I'm really sorry about that, James."
"This is getting us nowhere. We should stop- we're only hurting ourselves."
"I think Snape is right."
"What?"
"Did you just."
"I think he did."
"You just."
"My god, are you insane?"
"So Snape was right for the first time in his life. So what?"
"Oh, nothing."
"Okay, then."
"99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer."
"Take one down, pass it around."
"98 bottles of beer on the wall."
"98 bottles of beer on the wall, 98 bottles of beer."
"Will all of you just shut up? I can't hear myself think in here."
"You shut up, Snape."
"GUYS!"
"Sirius?"
"Yes, James?"
"Shut up. We have to figure out how to get out of here."
"I'm sure someone will find our dead and shrunken bodies sooner or later."
"Lets not be too cynical, shall we?"
"Remus, do you remember where we are?"
"Yes. In a pitch black room with no plan to get out."
"Exactly. Its kind of hard not to be cynical when you're trapped in a darkened room with only three people to keep you company."
"Are you saying we're boring?"
"No, of course he isn't, Peter. Are you?"
"No, no. Of course not."
"At least Snape isn't in here."
"Yes I am, you wankers."
"Snape!"
"I thought we covered that already?"
"Oh, this is fun."
"Shut up, James."
"You shut up."
"Guys! Can we please try not to fight?"
"Sorry, Remy."
"He started it."
"Who started it, Sirius, James?"
"No, Snape."
"I most certainly did not!"
"Well, if you weren't here we wouldn't have argued."
"Stop picking on each other. It gets annoying after a while."
"As annoying as Snape?"
"Can I borrow someone's wand to set fire to this git?"
"Er. I don't have my wand."
"Why don't you have your wand?"
"McGonagall has it. She's testing it for some kind of malfunction."
"Yes, but that's not the only reason you're failing Transfiguration, Charms, and Potions, now is it, Potter?"
"Shut up, Snape."
"Will you guys please stop fighting?
"We need to get out of here!"
"We know that, Peter."
"Well let's do something about it!"
"Er. You see."
"Spit it out, Pettigrew."
"I left my wand in the dorms."
"Peter!"
"I'm sorry, Remus. I just forgot."
"But you're never supposed leave your wand!"
"I know. I'm really sorry."
"It's okay, Remus. He just forgot."
"You mean the great rat can't even remember his own wand? He was probably going down to the kitchens, weren't you?"
"I was not!"
"Sure. How about you, Lupin? Are you an idiot like them, too?"
"I had my wand when we came in here, but I dropped it when Siri bumped into me."
"Damn it."
"Well, we'll just have to feel around for it, then."
"You mean none of you have your wands?"
"No."
"Not really."
"Nada."
"Sorry."
"Well, I don't have mine either. So if Potters plan it the best we've got, I suggest you get moving."
"You too, Snape."
"Of course. Do you really believe I think getting my hands dirty is beneath me?"
"Well. yeah."
"Black, Black, Black. It's a pity you're so stupid."
"I am not!"
"Guys! Lets try to look for Remy's wand!"
"Fine."
"Ow!"
"Bloody hell, Potter! Watch where you're going!"
"I can't see, you dolt!"
"So you can't use your ears?"
"Both of you shut up, and keep looking."
"Damn it! I just ran into a wall!"
"Be careful, Peter- crap! I just ran into someone."
"You ran into me, Siri."
"Oh. Sorry Remus."
"Ow! Someone just hit me in the shin!"
"Whoops."
"Stop laughing, Black. You too, Lupin."
"This isn't work- Aah! Damn it, that hurt, Remus!"
"Oh my. I'm really sorry about that, James."
"This is getting us nowhere. We should stop- we're only hurting ourselves."
"I think Snape is right."
"What?"
"Did you just."
"I think he did."
"You just."
"My god, are you insane?"
"So Snape was right for the first time in his life. So what?"
"Oh, nothing."
"Okay, then."
"99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer."
"Take one down, pass it around."
"98 bottles of beer on the wall."
"98 bottles of beer on the wall, 98 bottles of beer."
"Will all of you just shut up? I can't hear myself think in here."
"You shut up, Snape."
"GUYS!"