J.K. Rowling and Bloomsbury Publishers
Own the © on Severus and his mates
I do not own, I gather no riches
I'm merely toying with their fates
Andolyn
Visitations
Sleep would not come. Peace of mind remained elusive. Harry had stayed for a while after all the others had gone, and he had told Ari a horrific tale about an encounter he had had a few years ago with the giant spiders. Harry was not bragging, but his story made Ari realise what a brave boy he really was, him and his friend Ron Weasley both.
After a light supper, brought in by one of the over active house-elves, the mediwitch had urged Ari to take one of Snape's potions. One that would cause her to fall in a deep and dreamless sleep. But Ari had refused. She had never trusted any kind of sedative that induced sleep- she was not about to start now.
But tossing and turning in the large and empty ward, made her wish that she at least had tried the stuff for that night.
It wasn't the fear of the ghost that kept her awake. Both the Bloody Baron and Sir Nicholas de Mimsy-Porpington had been chivalrous in their approach and very kind in asking after her well-being. Sir Nicholas left quickly, unwilling to chill Ari more than was appropriate- But the Baron lingered, never looking at her directly and with a greyish smudge on both cheeks that might have been some kind of blush. Apparently he still did not like to be around women in their nightclothes.
"Milady- is it true my Head of House has been- less than polite too you?"
Ari smiled faintly. "Do you ghosts ever peek beyond the walls of the castle? Into the woods, for instance?"
The Baron floated away a bit, wavered back on his own draft.
"The ghost of a rumour, the voice of the wind and the cry of the Banshee. We speak to each other. We do send letters to each other too."
"By owl ghost?"
"Modern times, my dear. Those awfully noisy big metal things the muggles fly with, have a tendency to scoop birds out of the air and mangle them quite badly. Sometimes the poor startled creatures hang around a bit before they move on, and are trainable to become -our-version of owl post. The old fashioned way, to us at least, to hire a will-o'-the-wisp is still in use, off course."
Ari blinked.
"That was not quite what I meant- er- Look, my name is Ariadne and I'm not quite good in with the title thing-"
"You are asking me for my -name-!" the Baron thundered so loudly the walls shook and Ari had to force herself not to hide under the blankets.
"Did- did I say something inappropriate?"
The spectre managed to look embarrassed.
"Not really- but the last one to call me by my name- I -was- still alive, you see- I would rather forget about it, if you don't mind-"
"I'm sorry. I did not mean to remind you of something bad."
The ghost stared at his dragging feet, floating a few inches above the floor.
Sensing a change of subject was due, Ari went back to the grounds.
"Baron, it is really fascinating to learn how you ghosts communicate, but that was not quite what I meant. You see, I wondered if you have people on the grounds and in the forest."
"People? No, not people. We ghosts rarely venture outside the castle walls. With the exception of little Moaning Mirtle, who knows the lake and it's inhabitants quite well, I believe. But the grounds are filled with its own residents from the neither world. We have a few Washerwomen who dwell near the lake, it would be inadvisable to seek them out. There are Nymphs and Dryads in the woods. There is the White Lady who walks the fields-" The Baron's deafening voice faltered somewhat and he looked away. He even succeeded in sounding almost wistful.
"I believe she knows our Grey Lady of Ravenclaw quite well-"
"But you do not know what went on in the woods today?"
He shook his head.
"Severus and I, well, we have come to an understanding of sorts We dare not show that we have feelings for each other, but.."
The face of the Baron lit up like a star and the silver droplets on his robe shone like Christmas candles.
"He admitted he adores you?"
"I would not go that far. But we know."
"Yet he spurns you?"
Ari sighed and shivered. "It's difficult, Baron."
"I can see you both are prepared to listen to and obey the Headmaster!"
Ari shivered, not from the cold the wavering spirit radiated, but from the venom in his voice and the pale light that shone from his eyes. Two moons, seeking.
"Look, Baron! If it was up to me, I would have Severus right here in my bed, right now! And damn the Headmaster and propriety both!"
The ghost looked shocked with that statement.
"But I can neither force him nor circumstance. And we shall not be obedient little acolytes of Hogwarts, I can assure you that, the moment I've found a way around teachers, safety measures -and- the Headmaster. We'll -find- a way! I've promised you, Severus -and- myself I won't let him shrivel up inside himself, but it will have to wait at least until I'm out of here!"
Angrily the ghost turned away. "But he spurned you today! The bloody fool!"
"Is he now!"
Swiftly the spirit turned, with such a menacing stare, Ari really began to understand why everybody else feared him so.
"Indeed! For so was I! And look at me, woman! Look at the dear prize I've paid and shall pay until the end of time itself!"
Ari pulled up her blankets and cowered before the thundering ghost. Seeing her fear however, deflated him.
"Look at me child!" He asked pleadingly, with a soft voice that made him seem pathetically small, "Look at me and know what you most prevent him to become. An empty shell, trapped for all eternity to mourn over yet never be free from what might have been. I denied what life offered me and when I came to reason, it was far too late for me. But my fate shan't be anyone else's- not as long as I have the power to prevent it! This is my penance- do not deny even this little to me!"
While the ghost faded and disappeared, Ari was sure the only reason the embittered creature did not cry was because after almost a thousand years of wandering the halls of Hogwarts, he simply had no tears left.
And that was the true reason why Ari could not sleep. Although the Baron had taken the cold with him, the frost of fear had settled over her heart. Certainly the castle spirits would recognise one of their own, even if he was still walking and breathing instead of hovering and howling. Severus represented something to the Baron, a chance he lost himself, one he would not have Snape throw away.
Ari embraced herself. Her situation was rapidly becoming annoyingly romantic in a tragic sort of way, and she felt caught between her own emotions and the Baron's hopes.
And right in the middle of it all was the blissfully unaware stupidly stubborn Potions Master, who gallantly tried to protect her and keep her safe- denying his own needs and wants and in the process destroying himself.
Not if it was up to her!
Suddenly, a door squeaked and a floorboard cracked. A velvet voice muttered -damn- under it's breath and a soft flickering candle drew near. Not a ghost, this time.
"Still awake." the sardonic voice stated.
"What flushed you out of your dungeons."
A wry chuckle answered.
"Flushed out indeed! The dungeons are not exactly comfortable- they are just starting to warm up to the summer really and I am quite used to their customary temperature- But a continued visitation from a not-so-friendly House ghost is enough to even drive me out- Especially under the threat of giving Peeves the free reign of my quarters!"
Ari sat up, smiling broadly, knees pulled under her chin, arms wrapped around them. Snape was somewhat of a blur to her, due to the little light and the fact that her glasses were still on her bedside table.
"And what, pray, did the Baron implore you to do to ward off this terrible fate?"
Snape cocked his head and Ari fumbled for her glasses to at least be able to read the man's expression. Now she could see him more clearly, she had to make an effort not to laugh about his somewhat ridiculous costume. Although it probably was merely the customary night fashion for a wizard. Some drab grey nightshirt, closed high over his throat with a ribbon of the same colour, and a very unbecoming black dress-gown that made him look paler than ever in the surrounding dark, with a loose tie dangling from the waist. He seemed somewhat vulnerable dressed like this. And he was apparently not exactly pleased with his lack of sleep. The man yawned discreetly behind his hand and rubbed an eye.
"Would you refrain from pilfering my idiom, please?"
"Only if you tell me what he made you do."
Snape sighed, put down his candle on the Ari's bedside table, sat down next to her and crossed his arms over his chest defensively.
"Apologise."
"I beg your pardon?"
"Thank you and accepted, but no. Me. To you."
"Ah."
"What 'ah'."
"Thank you and accepted."
"Don't parrot me, explain."
"I think our mysterious Bloody matchmaking Baron is of the opinion that you should treat me like a Lady- and not run out of me making snide remarks."
Snape sighed heavily. "Now that is all I really needed. I thought you had implied he would assist should we- well-"
"Busy ourselves with some extra curricular activities the Headmaster should remain unaware of?"
Again that wry little smile. "Sort of."
Silence. Snape stared away into the still darkness of the empty hospital ward.
"Where did the cat scratch you? Does it still hurt?"
Severus turned, face unreadable. Ari steeled herself, anticipating a sneer about Filch or his animal. But Severus sighed, bent his head to her, pointed somewhere above his right ear and said: "Here."
Gently, carefully, Ari touched his hair, combed through it to reach the skin. The wizard held himself very, very still under her searching fingers, a nervous thoroughbred that would dart out of reach at the slightest fright.
Soft as silk, cool as water, caressing the back of her hand while her fingertips touched warm skin.
Severus shivered. When was it last, someone had touched this man with gentleness? Something beyond a handshake, bear hug or Pomfrey's detached professionalism? When was it last he'd allowed it?
Nervous herself, Ari broke the silence.
"I feel no scars."
The head tilted slightly and Severus' eyes met hers, while her hand slid to the back of his neck.
"Poppy is very good," he stated, edging his body a little closer.
They stared. Ari swallowed. Snape smiled.
A whisper.
"Well, my dear, what happened to your boldness?"
"Oh, so I'm always the one to make the first move?"
The smile faded.
"Scared?"
"Terrified."
"You should be."
Gently, Severus slid his arms around her waist and pulled her close. Ari's other hand joined the first. The avoided each others gaze by sitting head to head, staring down.
"Good friends died for loving me. Good people died because of my inaptness to act. I am not a kind man Ari- nor a good one."
"Dumbledore trusts you. Hooch trust you."
"That trust is hard won, little one. Very hard. And right now, I'm shaming it."
Disgusted with the self loathing in the deep voice, Ari used the only option she had in silencing him. She turned her face a bit, and brushed her lips to his. The man in her arms hesitated a heartbeat, and again lost himself within her embrace, returning her gentleness passionately, holding on to her as if she was a dream that could evaporate any second.
Ari could not think anymore. She could only hold on, comfort and receive comfort, acknowledging the warmth and indeed, the heat she felt rising within her body.
Another floorboard cracked, and both Ari and Snape whipped their heads in the direction of the sound, still holding each other.
Severus stared at the door of the ward that had cracked open, but he obviously detected no one. Ari stared at the floor, into the large, bud oddly satisfied and almost -smiling- face of a delicate tabby cat with odd markings around the eyes. Definitely -not- Mrs. Norris. It disappeared before Snape noticed it. The wizard shrugged, and turned his attention back to the woman in his arms.
"I should go."
She nodded sleepily and let him. She would talk to him about that other cat. Next time. Snape looked a little oddly at her, as he tucked her in and kissed her goodnight. Ari chuckled, she knew her eyes could be very expressive and dark when she thought certain thoughts about next time. The wizard waved his wand over her and whispered the word that had sent Harry to Neverland before. Ari let go of her hold on him and the world.
To dream about next time.
Own the © on Severus and his mates
I do not own, I gather no riches
I'm merely toying with their fates
Andolyn
Visitations
Sleep would not come. Peace of mind remained elusive. Harry had stayed for a while after all the others had gone, and he had told Ari a horrific tale about an encounter he had had a few years ago with the giant spiders. Harry was not bragging, but his story made Ari realise what a brave boy he really was, him and his friend Ron Weasley both.
After a light supper, brought in by one of the over active house-elves, the mediwitch had urged Ari to take one of Snape's potions. One that would cause her to fall in a deep and dreamless sleep. But Ari had refused. She had never trusted any kind of sedative that induced sleep- she was not about to start now.
But tossing and turning in the large and empty ward, made her wish that she at least had tried the stuff for that night.
It wasn't the fear of the ghost that kept her awake. Both the Bloody Baron and Sir Nicholas de Mimsy-Porpington had been chivalrous in their approach and very kind in asking after her well-being. Sir Nicholas left quickly, unwilling to chill Ari more than was appropriate- But the Baron lingered, never looking at her directly and with a greyish smudge on both cheeks that might have been some kind of blush. Apparently he still did not like to be around women in their nightclothes.
"Milady- is it true my Head of House has been- less than polite too you?"
Ari smiled faintly. "Do you ghosts ever peek beyond the walls of the castle? Into the woods, for instance?"
The Baron floated away a bit, wavered back on his own draft.
"The ghost of a rumour, the voice of the wind and the cry of the Banshee. We speak to each other. We do send letters to each other too."
"By owl ghost?"
"Modern times, my dear. Those awfully noisy big metal things the muggles fly with, have a tendency to scoop birds out of the air and mangle them quite badly. Sometimes the poor startled creatures hang around a bit before they move on, and are trainable to become -our-version of owl post. The old fashioned way, to us at least, to hire a will-o'-the-wisp is still in use, off course."
Ari blinked.
"That was not quite what I meant- er- Look, my name is Ariadne and I'm not quite good in with the title thing-"
"You are asking me for my -name-!" the Baron thundered so loudly the walls shook and Ari had to force herself not to hide under the blankets.
"Did- did I say something inappropriate?"
The spectre managed to look embarrassed.
"Not really- but the last one to call me by my name- I -was- still alive, you see- I would rather forget about it, if you don't mind-"
"I'm sorry. I did not mean to remind you of something bad."
The ghost stared at his dragging feet, floating a few inches above the floor.
Sensing a change of subject was due, Ari went back to the grounds.
"Baron, it is really fascinating to learn how you ghosts communicate, but that was not quite what I meant. You see, I wondered if you have people on the grounds and in the forest."
"People? No, not people. We ghosts rarely venture outside the castle walls. With the exception of little Moaning Mirtle, who knows the lake and it's inhabitants quite well, I believe. But the grounds are filled with its own residents from the neither world. We have a few Washerwomen who dwell near the lake, it would be inadvisable to seek them out. There are Nymphs and Dryads in the woods. There is the White Lady who walks the fields-" The Baron's deafening voice faltered somewhat and he looked away. He even succeeded in sounding almost wistful.
"I believe she knows our Grey Lady of Ravenclaw quite well-"
"But you do not know what went on in the woods today?"
He shook his head.
"Severus and I, well, we have come to an understanding of sorts We dare not show that we have feelings for each other, but.."
The face of the Baron lit up like a star and the silver droplets on his robe shone like Christmas candles.
"He admitted he adores you?"
"I would not go that far. But we know."
"Yet he spurns you?"
Ari sighed and shivered. "It's difficult, Baron."
"I can see you both are prepared to listen to and obey the Headmaster!"
Ari shivered, not from the cold the wavering spirit radiated, but from the venom in his voice and the pale light that shone from his eyes. Two moons, seeking.
"Look, Baron! If it was up to me, I would have Severus right here in my bed, right now! And damn the Headmaster and propriety both!"
The ghost looked shocked with that statement.
"But I can neither force him nor circumstance. And we shall not be obedient little acolytes of Hogwarts, I can assure you that, the moment I've found a way around teachers, safety measures -and- the Headmaster. We'll -find- a way! I've promised you, Severus -and- myself I won't let him shrivel up inside himself, but it will have to wait at least until I'm out of here!"
Angrily the ghost turned away. "But he spurned you today! The bloody fool!"
"Is he now!"
Swiftly the spirit turned, with such a menacing stare, Ari really began to understand why everybody else feared him so.
"Indeed! For so was I! And look at me, woman! Look at the dear prize I've paid and shall pay until the end of time itself!"
Ari pulled up her blankets and cowered before the thundering ghost. Seeing her fear however, deflated him.
"Look at me child!" He asked pleadingly, with a soft voice that made him seem pathetically small, "Look at me and know what you most prevent him to become. An empty shell, trapped for all eternity to mourn over yet never be free from what might have been. I denied what life offered me and when I came to reason, it was far too late for me. But my fate shan't be anyone else's- not as long as I have the power to prevent it! This is my penance- do not deny even this little to me!"
While the ghost faded and disappeared, Ari was sure the only reason the embittered creature did not cry was because after almost a thousand years of wandering the halls of Hogwarts, he simply had no tears left.
And that was the true reason why Ari could not sleep. Although the Baron had taken the cold with him, the frost of fear had settled over her heart. Certainly the castle spirits would recognise one of their own, even if he was still walking and breathing instead of hovering and howling. Severus represented something to the Baron, a chance he lost himself, one he would not have Snape throw away.
Ari embraced herself. Her situation was rapidly becoming annoyingly romantic in a tragic sort of way, and she felt caught between her own emotions and the Baron's hopes.
And right in the middle of it all was the blissfully unaware stupidly stubborn Potions Master, who gallantly tried to protect her and keep her safe- denying his own needs and wants and in the process destroying himself.
Not if it was up to her!
Suddenly, a door squeaked and a floorboard cracked. A velvet voice muttered -damn- under it's breath and a soft flickering candle drew near. Not a ghost, this time.
"Still awake." the sardonic voice stated.
"What flushed you out of your dungeons."
A wry chuckle answered.
"Flushed out indeed! The dungeons are not exactly comfortable- they are just starting to warm up to the summer really and I am quite used to their customary temperature- But a continued visitation from a not-so-friendly House ghost is enough to even drive me out- Especially under the threat of giving Peeves the free reign of my quarters!"
Ari sat up, smiling broadly, knees pulled under her chin, arms wrapped around them. Snape was somewhat of a blur to her, due to the little light and the fact that her glasses were still on her bedside table.
"And what, pray, did the Baron implore you to do to ward off this terrible fate?"
Snape cocked his head and Ari fumbled for her glasses to at least be able to read the man's expression. Now she could see him more clearly, she had to make an effort not to laugh about his somewhat ridiculous costume. Although it probably was merely the customary night fashion for a wizard. Some drab grey nightshirt, closed high over his throat with a ribbon of the same colour, and a very unbecoming black dress-gown that made him look paler than ever in the surrounding dark, with a loose tie dangling from the waist. He seemed somewhat vulnerable dressed like this. And he was apparently not exactly pleased with his lack of sleep. The man yawned discreetly behind his hand and rubbed an eye.
"Would you refrain from pilfering my idiom, please?"
"Only if you tell me what he made you do."
Snape sighed, put down his candle on the Ari's bedside table, sat down next to her and crossed his arms over his chest defensively.
"Apologise."
"I beg your pardon?"
"Thank you and accepted, but no. Me. To you."
"Ah."
"What 'ah'."
"Thank you and accepted."
"Don't parrot me, explain."
"I think our mysterious Bloody matchmaking Baron is of the opinion that you should treat me like a Lady- and not run out of me making snide remarks."
Snape sighed heavily. "Now that is all I really needed. I thought you had implied he would assist should we- well-"
"Busy ourselves with some extra curricular activities the Headmaster should remain unaware of?"
Again that wry little smile. "Sort of."
Silence. Snape stared away into the still darkness of the empty hospital ward.
"Where did the cat scratch you? Does it still hurt?"
Severus turned, face unreadable. Ari steeled herself, anticipating a sneer about Filch or his animal. But Severus sighed, bent his head to her, pointed somewhere above his right ear and said: "Here."
Gently, carefully, Ari touched his hair, combed through it to reach the skin. The wizard held himself very, very still under her searching fingers, a nervous thoroughbred that would dart out of reach at the slightest fright.
Soft as silk, cool as water, caressing the back of her hand while her fingertips touched warm skin.
Severus shivered. When was it last, someone had touched this man with gentleness? Something beyond a handshake, bear hug or Pomfrey's detached professionalism? When was it last he'd allowed it?
Nervous herself, Ari broke the silence.
"I feel no scars."
The head tilted slightly and Severus' eyes met hers, while her hand slid to the back of his neck.
"Poppy is very good," he stated, edging his body a little closer.
They stared. Ari swallowed. Snape smiled.
A whisper.
"Well, my dear, what happened to your boldness?"
"Oh, so I'm always the one to make the first move?"
The smile faded.
"Scared?"
"Terrified."
"You should be."
Gently, Severus slid his arms around her waist and pulled her close. Ari's other hand joined the first. The avoided each others gaze by sitting head to head, staring down.
"Good friends died for loving me. Good people died because of my inaptness to act. I am not a kind man Ari- nor a good one."
"Dumbledore trusts you. Hooch trust you."
"That trust is hard won, little one. Very hard. And right now, I'm shaming it."
Disgusted with the self loathing in the deep voice, Ari used the only option she had in silencing him. She turned her face a bit, and brushed her lips to his. The man in her arms hesitated a heartbeat, and again lost himself within her embrace, returning her gentleness passionately, holding on to her as if she was a dream that could evaporate any second.
Ari could not think anymore. She could only hold on, comfort and receive comfort, acknowledging the warmth and indeed, the heat she felt rising within her body.
Another floorboard cracked, and both Ari and Snape whipped their heads in the direction of the sound, still holding each other.
Severus stared at the door of the ward that had cracked open, but he obviously detected no one. Ari stared at the floor, into the large, bud oddly satisfied and almost -smiling- face of a delicate tabby cat with odd markings around the eyes. Definitely -not- Mrs. Norris. It disappeared before Snape noticed it. The wizard shrugged, and turned his attention back to the woman in his arms.
"I should go."
She nodded sleepily and let him. She would talk to him about that other cat. Next time. Snape looked a little oddly at her, as he tucked her in and kissed her goodnight. Ari chuckled, she knew her eyes could be very expressive and dark when she thought certain thoughts about next time. The wizard waved his wand over her and whispered the word that had sent Harry to Neverland before. Ari let go of her hold on him and the world.
To dream about next time.