Chapter 20 - Brethilitis Strikes Again
"I know you will think of something, Mr. Invisible Baggins!" Thorin whispered into the keyhole when Bilbo next visited him. "I have only the greatest faith in your abilities! You are nearly as much use to us as the Wizard now. Drat him for disappearing when we needed him."
Bilbo grimaced slightly and bid farewell to the Dwarf.
~Bother! ~ he thought as he crept back up the passage way and into the more inhabited part of the palace. ~ Those Dwarves are more trouble than they are worth! No amount of treasure will make up for this! I only have one ring and there are thirteen of them! How am I to get them out of here? Those blasted doors seem to be the only way out of this confusing place. What am I to do? ~
His furry feet carried him to Legolas' room. The activity about the palace was rather subdued that day as the feast of the night before had been very festive indeed. Legolas was lying on his bed staring at the ceiling; his blue eyes somewhat blank. Bilbo slipped his ring into his pocket and climbed onto the bed, smiling.
"Rather late in the day to be lazing in bed," he said cheerfully. When he received no response, he frowned and bent over the prince. "Prince Legolas?" The elf remained motionless and unaware. The poor hobbit felt a stab of fear pass through him. What if he was dead? What if the pipeweed had at last killed him? "Legolas! Legolas!" He shook the prince looking into those staring blue eyes.
Legolas' eyes focused and he blinked, rather startled by Bilbo seated on his knees beside him shaking him rather forcefully.
"What is it?" he said, sitting up. "What is wrong? Bilbo?"
Bilbo stared at him.
"I . . . I thought you were. . . ." He shook his head. "Your eyes were open and you weren't responding."
Legolas stretched catlike and stared at the hobbit.
"I was asleep, Bilbo. I had a rather late night."
"Asleep? But your eyes were open. How could you be sleeping?"
The elven prince laughed merrily. He felt in quite a good mood and smiled down at the hobbit, whose blue eyes were filled with confusion and concern.
"All elves sleep with their eyes open, Bilbo. Unless we are ill or hurt. What are you doing in here anyway? Where have you been these past days?" Even as he said this he thought ~ Do I really want to know? ~ He knew that his father was not one to let anything slip by him, and he had mentioned the hobbit's name the night before. Then Brethil had started to blurt out everything he knew in typical Brethil fashion before Thranduil had stopped him. His father may not have wanted to know whom Bilbo was last night, but Legolas feared that Thranduil might want to know today. Truly, his father never forgot anything. "Never mind," he muttered, looking down at the cover on his bed. It was best not to know. And he couldn't get in trouble for something he didn't know. Well, maybe not.
"I have been visiting the dwarves."
Legolas raised his dark brows and got out of the bed.
"How are they faring?" he asked politely, moving to wash his face, which had suddenly reddened as he recalled what had happened the Dreadful Night of the Pipeweed Incident as he had come to think of it. He stared into his mirror and pushed distractedly at the hair sticking up on the left side of his head. "They are all well, aren't they? We have been feeding them, you know. They are no longer starving." He still felt somewhat guilty about not feeding them when they had happened on them in the woods. Perhaps Brethil had been right after all.
"Oh, no, they are no longer starving. They are all doing quite well actually." The hobbit laughed and slipped from the bed and moved to the chair he had inhabited when portraying Silivren Hithlain Man. "Bombur doesn't want to leave."
"Oh? And why is that?" Legolas splashed water on his face and dried it.
Bilbo chuckled remembering his conversation with the Dwarf. Bombur was rather enjoying his time of imprisonment. His guards had soon found him to be something of a connoisseur of foodstuffs and had delighted in bringing him delicacies from the kitchens that were meant for the king's table. They enjoyed his critiques, thought he never seemed to have anything bad to say about anything placed before him.
Legolas smiled at this, having heard much the same thing from some of the elven guards. He frowned once more at his hair muttering again as his slender fingers tried once more to weave it - unsuccessfully - into a longer braid somewhat further back on his head then it normally would have been.
Bilbo smiled over at him, and shook his head.
"I really am rather sorry about the pipeweed, Prince Legolas. If I had known how you would react to it I never would have given it to you."
"If I had known how I would react I never would have taken it," the elf rejoined, pushing yet again at his wet hair with his fingers. "I can't believe I cut my Warrior braid off," he said, glaring at his reflection, "and gave it to a dwarf!"
"Gloin is quite thrilled with it," the hobbit continued, looking amused. "He keeps it near his heart. He was all concern for your welfare after it happened."
"I am pleased to hear it," Legolas said sarcastically, then a worried frown creased his brow. "He doesn't still think that I am a female, does he?"
"Well. . . ." Bilbo shrugged. "I am afraid he does, though he mentioned that your voice was deeper than he imagined."
"My voice?" Legolas snorted, then paused. "Bilbo, did I really sing with the dwarf?"
"You did, and a very nice song it was, too. Something about rolling down a hole." The hobbit laughed remembering that night. "Your voices complimented one another nicely. Though I was rather surprised that Gloin knew any songs in Elvish."
"The barrel song," Legolas groaned, leaning forward to rest his hands on the dresser and shaking his head. "I hate that song."
"What is the barrel song?" Bilbo asked curiously.
"It is a song that we sing about the empty barrels that we float out of the palace and down the river. We import many of our things from other places. Especially the wines. They come from our kin in the south or from the Men. Ai!" he sighed, looking at his mutilated hair once more.
"You float the barrels down the river? The one that runs in front of the castle?" Bilbo sat forward, suddenly feeling a dim ray of hope.
"Yes. Celon o Tinnu - the River of Night."
"Do you roll the barrels out of the magic doors then?" Bilbo asked excitedly.
"No. They are pushed into the water and go out the water-gate. Some of them go to Long Lake. There is a settlement of Men there living on an island. The only way to reach it is by crossing one of their many bridges." He snorted, twisting at his hair and giving himself a headache. "They fear the Dragon of course."
Bilbo started.
"Dragon? Did you say Dragon?" ~ Perhaps, ~he thought gleefully, ~ I am useful!~
He listened to the prince rattle on and on about Smaug the great Dragon that inhabited Erebor, and how it hoarded all the dwarves' treasures that were supposedly in the mountain. But while he continued to speak Bilbo heard something that the prince did not: footsteps approaching the room. He hastily shoved his ring onto his finger and slid out of the chair and under the bed.
"I have always wanted to see a Dragon," Legolas was saying, pleased with himself now that the hair had at last been forced into a tight braid that he continued to weave it in with some longer strands. "I know that is foolish, but I am sure Dragons are quite impressive. That is why I like my bubble pipe so much. It has a Dragon's head on it, remember? They must be quite enormous. Don't you think so, Bilbo?" He turned to the hobbit, but Bilbo was gone.
"Who are you talking to, Little Greenleaf?"
He spun and found his father standing in the doorway, one brow raised.
Blue eyes frantically searched his room for any sign of the hobbit, but he was nowhere to be seen. He gulped slightly and turned to his father.
"I . . . um. . . that is. . . I was just. . . ." His eyes widened as they met Thranduil's. His father did not look amused as he had the night before.
"Little Greenleaf, I believe that there are some things we need to discuss," the king said, his own eyes roaming about the room for the elusive Bilbo.
"Oh? I can't imagine what. Wasn't . . . wasn't the feast last night wonderful?" He smiled tremulously. "And . . . and the children were so sweet and cute and . . . ."
Thranduil's brow rose further.
"And did you see Tanglinna dancing with Lendlaes? She is so small and cute and he looked rather. . . large. Almost like you must have looked dancing with the goblin when you smoked . . . pipeweed . . . in. . . the forest. . . ." He faltered and swallowed. Then he groaned. ~ There must be magic afoot here! ~ he thought desperately. ~ Because I have turned into Brethil! ~
Thranduil's face reddened and his eyes narrowed. He had not had an amusing night after the feast. Aralith had trailed him to his room, insisting that he wanted to spend the remainder of the night there and not in his own room. And when at last he had wrested the reason for his son's great fear from him - more spiders in the palace!! - he had lost his mellow mood and spent the rest of the night brooding and growling. And now his son mentioned that time with the Goblin!! No one was supposed to remember that! He had specifically told all those who had been with him at the time to forget about it! But it seemed someone had not. ~ I should have made them drink water from Morn Nen ! ~ he thought angrily, wondering what revenge he would get on his Master Archer.
"What did you say?" he asked in a low dangerous voice.
"Nothing?"
Thranduil breathed slowly several times through his nose, feeling the heat in his face cool a bit.
"It seems we have more to discuss than I first thought," he managed in a normal voice. "You had better come with me now."
Legolas' shoulders slumped and he grimaced. He glanced once more in the mirror only to find that his braid had come loose and his short hair was free once more.
"This is not going to be a good day," he said morosely.
"What are you saying now, Little Greenleaf?" Thranduil called back from the hallway.
"Nothing. I am saying nothing. Ai, Valar. When will I learn to keep my mouth shut. I *am* turning into Brethil. This is not going to be a good day." He followed his father down the hallway, kicking at the floor.
Bilbo waited until they were gone before slipping from under the bed.
"Water-gate, eh?" He smiled. "I will have to find out about this water-gate." He left the room, quietly and on invisible feet. "Thank you again, Prince Legolas. This has turned out to be a rather good day for me!" He hurried down the corridors toward the cellars.
TBC
Author's Note
Yes. I know that Bilbo learned about the water-gate by lurking in corners and listening to the king's servants talking about it. But I changed it a little. Canon people I apologize, but hey! It is more fun this way.
Response to Reviewers
Anonymous - It is irritating when someone is standing over your shoulder telling you they need the computer, isn't it. That happens here all the time! Thank you for your comments on Master Tolkien. I love "The Hobbit" and have for more than couple of decades now. It was the first Tolkien that I had ever read and it got me royally hooked! I think that I, too, would have trouble living down all the "fun" Legolas has gotten himself into. And I am glad that you like the image of the proud Thorin as a petulant child pouting in the dark! That was rather fun!! As you have seen Legolas was blamed for Aralith's spider's mischief! After all how many spiders can there be in the palace?? (wicked grin) Cleaning anything for a prolonged amount of time can be boring!! And I serious doubt Legolas will every "play" with pipeweed ever again. As for playing with Gwibess..well, we shall see! And now for your next review! I liked the sourpuss part, too! He sure looked like one to me, hence the name! And yes, poor Aralith is having a rather hard time of it! Rather like myself when I am out of Raid and have a wasp fly into the house!! I am glad that some of Thranduil's reactions surprised you. I need to keep everyone guessing. Especially telling Brethil to shut up! Gotta love that! LOL means laughs out loud, lots of love, lots of luck. Rather a catchall phrase.
annakas - That chapter was cute and sweet! Everyone seems to think so! And yes, poor Aralith will be scarred for life because of that big bad spider dude! Or at least until Mithrandir shows up with more of his Magic Spider Spray!!
Nancing Elf - That was cute! And I'll just bet you want to sit on Legolas' hip and get spun around!! (smirks back at you though the same thought had crossed the author's mind!) I was glad Thranduil didn't pitch a fit either. He has had a few too many of late and it is time for him to relax and enjoy life a little! And yes, their punishment is over. Finally!! And you are right; with Brethil it is never a slip of the tongue! It is a way of life. And I swear on my copy of the Hobbit that I will not apologize again for "Hearts of Darkness"! I have done that too many times already. And yes, unfortunately life is tragic, nin mellon. But it is also fun!
queenie - I am glad that you enjoyed that chapter. I did, too! It was time for some fun in a lighthearted-no one-gets-in-trouble kind of way. And Thranduil would have had health problems if he didn't lighten up a little. He has been way to tense in this one!! I wish we could all have been at the party!!
Maria - It is strange isn't it how much we all love that Elf prince!! He has never had so many admirers before! And kids are always fun and Legolas is fun with kids! And Thranduil knows how to have fun, too. After all Legolas has to have gotten it from somewhere! I don't want this to end either. We shall see what I can come up with though I only see two or three more chapters ahead! Of course if I can prolong it I will!! We'll see. And as I read along in the Hobbit I see there are some things that need attending to, so maybe there will be a few more than two or three. And thank you for reviewing my other fics! Two in one night!! Wow! And you like Egla Ash's poetry!! Thanks again, you made his day!! And I think you have a life about like a lot of us here on Ff.net! We are strange and weird and loving it!! And don't worry. Unless my fingers fall off I won't stop writing!
Irena - Better than a sitcom?? Well, I hope so! Just joking.maybe. Some sitcoms are horrible! And yes, things can and probably will still happen! And oh, no!! You are not being reassuring about your story at all!! (gulps nervously waiting for the Author Alert to tell her that Irena has written another chapter!)
Rings of the cosmos - I find that spiders with big bloated bodies are so much creepier than the others! Though the big one in our back yard is like the ones in "8-legged freaks". I am not as afraid of them as I once was, but they still startle me especially when they are larger than they should be! We are going to see that movie next weekend! And I am weird and proud of it too!!!!!!!
Mitheithel - I do indeed know how hard it is to restrain laughter! Very very!! And I have found the harder I try to restrain it the worse it gets! I am glad that you are finding this so humorous! It has been a delightful romp in all! I know my family thinks I am nuts when I get so happy with my own ideas that I laugh about it.
JastaElf - Yes, it is nice to see Thranduil in action and having fun doing it! And I suspect that the spiders will be back! After all they are getting what they want! And I do promise not to apologize again!! I went a bit wacko with the apologizes! But Ai, Valar! That is life. I guess I need to take a couple lessons from the Berethath ned Faeg! (Queens of Mean) meaning you and Irena of course. (looks innocent "Who said that?? Me?? YGBK (you've got to be kidding!) I think you are mistaken!) *smirks* As to how far this story will go only Eru knows that! (grins)
Sake - So now you want Legolas and Thranduil to drink sake and get drunk! You are so wicked!! (grins) And seeing Gloin's reaction to his "princess" fighting with Orcs would be - dare I say - preciousssss.
CD - Thank you for reviewing!! And I am so glad that you find this so funny! I hope I can continue to keep you laughing.
Karina - That chapter was such bodacious fun to write!! I wanted a fun-no- shrieking-beast chapter and I got one. Only poor Aralith remained uptight! I guess I will have to do something about that wicked Remmith following him around! And t'would appear that I am not quite done. Just how far I will take it I do not know at present. I could take it through the Battle of Five Armies, but that involves some sad stuff and not so funny, so I don't know about that yet. We shall see.
Angaloth - Glorfindel is definitely my second!! And thanks for reviewing "Bells of Silver". I am slow in updating it I know as I am up to my neck in researching about Glorfindel and his past. I am not a First Age person, so I have to do a lot of reading because I want it to be right. It is so sweet that Brethil is on your list! He is thrilled! And I loved King Thranduil joining in on the fun, too!
No one - As you saw they did get "stuck" at the kids' table and a good time was had by all!! As to my spelling, I actually spell rather well, but I type terribly!! Some day I will actually reread my old stuff and fix all those typos! As to your forgiveness for my meanness, well I hope you will forgive me, but I won't apologize any more. I think some of my readers are tired of me apologizing for it again and again. And I am tired of apologizing. So please see fit to forgive me anyway!! BTW - I didn't know that 17 exclamation points were magic! Very cool!! And thank you for the nice email. Surprised me because that is not the email address I usually use!
Lakergurl 13 - The last chapter for me was the most fun to write thus far! Throwing berries is great fun and even Thranduil himself must admit that! (grin) Well, you can try to pay Thranduil for one of Legolas' remaining braids, but be warned!! He likes sparkly, expensive things!!
PuterPatty - First let me thank you for r/r - ing my old fics! I always check them for reviews even though at this point they are buried in the Ff.net archives and I am always amazed when people find them and like them! Of course now my review alert is working again, so that is nice! It sounds like you are OD ing on my stuff!! Valar, but I am honored! I did enjoy my cliffhangers quite a lot in them! (grins) And I could do with a bonus and a raise!! My imagination is on overdrive and in overtime at this point! It gets rather wearying!! I know that Legolas is rather OOC in this one, but it is too much fun!! I love him even more now, too, though how that is possible I do not know! And I can see where your mind is wandering!! Elf butts indeed! (shakes her head and grins again) And thanks! You Rock, too, nin mellon!!
LOTR lover - It was a refreshing break in that last chapter. But I am afraid things will be starting up again. (grin) And those kids are pretty sweet! All kids are! Well, all kids can be. (looking at her two little hellions who can be so sweet and so not sweet by turns)
Also to the person sent me the nice email - thank you! Since you didn't sign it I don't know what to call you ~ I guess I could call you and your friends the "Lord of the Rings Freaks" (grinz)~and I doubt you want your email address plastered all over ff.net, so I won't use it here. Any help with my Sindarin is much appreciated. I have so much to learn in that area! I am glad that you and your friends are enjoying this little tale of mine so much! I have a Legolas action figure, too, though he lives on the shelf by my bed!! And your report for your Spanish class sounds great! You should post it on Ff.net!! Thanks so much for your great compliments!!
BTW - Is anyone a member of the fan club?? And if so did you read in the third issue of the LOTR Fan Club Official Movie Magazine about the inscription on Arwen's sword?? I did and my first reaction was Wow!! Very cool! But then I actually thought about it. Her sword was Idril's (the mother of Earendil). And Idril was, of course, one of the survivors of the fall of Gondolin who accompanied the other survivors out of the city, which included Glorfindel whose place Arwen took in the movie!! Glorfindel was slain on Cirith Thoronath while fighting a Balrog when the survivors were ambushed on their trek through the mountains. Is that a slap in Glorfindel's face or what??!! Where is my shovel?! And the Shovel Brigade!!
"I know you will think of something, Mr. Invisible Baggins!" Thorin whispered into the keyhole when Bilbo next visited him. "I have only the greatest faith in your abilities! You are nearly as much use to us as the Wizard now. Drat him for disappearing when we needed him."
Bilbo grimaced slightly and bid farewell to the Dwarf.
~Bother! ~ he thought as he crept back up the passage way and into the more inhabited part of the palace. ~ Those Dwarves are more trouble than they are worth! No amount of treasure will make up for this! I only have one ring and there are thirteen of them! How am I to get them out of here? Those blasted doors seem to be the only way out of this confusing place. What am I to do? ~
His furry feet carried him to Legolas' room. The activity about the palace was rather subdued that day as the feast of the night before had been very festive indeed. Legolas was lying on his bed staring at the ceiling; his blue eyes somewhat blank. Bilbo slipped his ring into his pocket and climbed onto the bed, smiling.
"Rather late in the day to be lazing in bed," he said cheerfully. When he received no response, he frowned and bent over the prince. "Prince Legolas?" The elf remained motionless and unaware. The poor hobbit felt a stab of fear pass through him. What if he was dead? What if the pipeweed had at last killed him? "Legolas! Legolas!" He shook the prince looking into those staring blue eyes.
Legolas' eyes focused and he blinked, rather startled by Bilbo seated on his knees beside him shaking him rather forcefully.
"What is it?" he said, sitting up. "What is wrong? Bilbo?"
Bilbo stared at him.
"I . . . I thought you were. . . ." He shook his head. "Your eyes were open and you weren't responding."
Legolas stretched catlike and stared at the hobbit.
"I was asleep, Bilbo. I had a rather late night."
"Asleep? But your eyes were open. How could you be sleeping?"
The elven prince laughed merrily. He felt in quite a good mood and smiled down at the hobbit, whose blue eyes were filled with confusion and concern.
"All elves sleep with their eyes open, Bilbo. Unless we are ill or hurt. What are you doing in here anyway? Where have you been these past days?" Even as he said this he thought ~ Do I really want to know? ~ He knew that his father was not one to let anything slip by him, and he had mentioned the hobbit's name the night before. Then Brethil had started to blurt out everything he knew in typical Brethil fashion before Thranduil had stopped him. His father may not have wanted to know whom Bilbo was last night, but Legolas feared that Thranduil might want to know today. Truly, his father never forgot anything. "Never mind," he muttered, looking down at the cover on his bed. It was best not to know. And he couldn't get in trouble for something he didn't know. Well, maybe not.
"I have been visiting the dwarves."
Legolas raised his dark brows and got out of the bed.
"How are they faring?" he asked politely, moving to wash his face, which had suddenly reddened as he recalled what had happened the Dreadful Night of the Pipeweed Incident as he had come to think of it. He stared into his mirror and pushed distractedly at the hair sticking up on the left side of his head. "They are all well, aren't they? We have been feeding them, you know. They are no longer starving." He still felt somewhat guilty about not feeding them when they had happened on them in the woods. Perhaps Brethil had been right after all.
"Oh, no, they are no longer starving. They are all doing quite well actually." The hobbit laughed and slipped from the bed and moved to the chair he had inhabited when portraying Silivren Hithlain Man. "Bombur doesn't want to leave."
"Oh? And why is that?" Legolas splashed water on his face and dried it.
Bilbo chuckled remembering his conversation with the Dwarf. Bombur was rather enjoying his time of imprisonment. His guards had soon found him to be something of a connoisseur of foodstuffs and had delighted in bringing him delicacies from the kitchens that were meant for the king's table. They enjoyed his critiques, thought he never seemed to have anything bad to say about anything placed before him.
Legolas smiled at this, having heard much the same thing from some of the elven guards. He frowned once more at his hair muttering again as his slender fingers tried once more to weave it - unsuccessfully - into a longer braid somewhat further back on his head then it normally would have been.
Bilbo smiled over at him, and shook his head.
"I really am rather sorry about the pipeweed, Prince Legolas. If I had known how you would react to it I never would have given it to you."
"If I had known how I would react I never would have taken it," the elf rejoined, pushing yet again at his wet hair with his fingers. "I can't believe I cut my Warrior braid off," he said, glaring at his reflection, "and gave it to a dwarf!"
"Gloin is quite thrilled with it," the hobbit continued, looking amused. "He keeps it near his heart. He was all concern for your welfare after it happened."
"I am pleased to hear it," Legolas said sarcastically, then a worried frown creased his brow. "He doesn't still think that I am a female, does he?"
"Well. . . ." Bilbo shrugged. "I am afraid he does, though he mentioned that your voice was deeper than he imagined."
"My voice?" Legolas snorted, then paused. "Bilbo, did I really sing with the dwarf?"
"You did, and a very nice song it was, too. Something about rolling down a hole." The hobbit laughed remembering that night. "Your voices complimented one another nicely. Though I was rather surprised that Gloin knew any songs in Elvish."
"The barrel song," Legolas groaned, leaning forward to rest his hands on the dresser and shaking his head. "I hate that song."
"What is the barrel song?" Bilbo asked curiously.
"It is a song that we sing about the empty barrels that we float out of the palace and down the river. We import many of our things from other places. Especially the wines. They come from our kin in the south or from the Men. Ai!" he sighed, looking at his mutilated hair once more.
"You float the barrels down the river? The one that runs in front of the castle?" Bilbo sat forward, suddenly feeling a dim ray of hope.
"Yes. Celon o Tinnu - the River of Night."
"Do you roll the barrels out of the magic doors then?" Bilbo asked excitedly.
"No. They are pushed into the water and go out the water-gate. Some of them go to Long Lake. There is a settlement of Men there living on an island. The only way to reach it is by crossing one of their many bridges." He snorted, twisting at his hair and giving himself a headache. "They fear the Dragon of course."
Bilbo started.
"Dragon? Did you say Dragon?" ~ Perhaps, ~he thought gleefully, ~ I am useful!~
He listened to the prince rattle on and on about Smaug the great Dragon that inhabited Erebor, and how it hoarded all the dwarves' treasures that were supposedly in the mountain. But while he continued to speak Bilbo heard something that the prince did not: footsteps approaching the room. He hastily shoved his ring onto his finger and slid out of the chair and under the bed.
"I have always wanted to see a Dragon," Legolas was saying, pleased with himself now that the hair had at last been forced into a tight braid that he continued to weave it in with some longer strands. "I know that is foolish, but I am sure Dragons are quite impressive. That is why I like my bubble pipe so much. It has a Dragon's head on it, remember? They must be quite enormous. Don't you think so, Bilbo?" He turned to the hobbit, but Bilbo was gone.
"Who are you talking to, Little Greenleaf?"
He spun and found his father standing in the doorway, one brow raised.
Blue eyes frantically searched his room for any sign of the hobbit, but he was nowhere to be seen. He gulped slightly and turned to his father.
"I . . . um. . . that is. . . I was just. . . ." His eyes widened as they met Thranduil's. His father did not look amused as he had the night before.
"Little Greenleaf, I believe that there are some things we need to discuss," the king said, his own eyes roaming about the room for the elusive Bilbo.
"Oh? I can't imagine what. Wasn't . . . wasn't the feast last night wonderful?" He smiled tremulously. "And . . . and the children were so sweet and cute and . . . ."
Thranduil's brow rose further.
"And did you see Tanglinna dancing with Lendlaes? She is so small and cute and he looked rather. . . large. Almost like you must have looked dancing with the goblin when you smoked . . . pipeweed . . . in. . . the forest. . . ." He faltered and swallowed. Then he groaned. ~ There must be magic afoot here! ~ he thought desperately. ~ Because I have turned into Brethil! ~
Thranduil's face reddened and his eyes narrowed. He had not had an amusing night after the feast. Aralith had trailed him to his room, insisting that he wanted to spend the remainder of the night there and not in his own room. And when at last he had wrested the reason for his son's great fear from him - more spiders in the palace!! - he had lost his mellow mood and spent the rest of the night brooding and growling. And now his son mentioned that time with the Goblin!! No one was supposed to remember that! He had specifically told all those who had been with him at the time to forget about it! But it seemed someone had not. ~ I should have made them drink water from Morn Nen ! ~ he thought angrily, wondering what revenge he would get on his Master Archer.
"What did you say?" he asked in a low dangerous voice.
"Nothing?"
Thranduil breathed slowly several times through his nose, feeling the heat in his face cool a bit.
"It seems we have more to discuss than I first thought," he managed in a normal voice. "You had better come with me now."
Legolas' shoulders slumped and he grimaced. He glanced once more in the mirror only to find that his braid had come loose and his short hair was free once more.
"This is not going to be a good day," he said morosely.
"What are you saying now, Little Greenleaf?" Thranduil called back from the hallway.
"Nothing. I am saying nothing. Ai, Valar. When will I learn to keep my mouth shut. I *am* turning into Brethil. This is not going to be a good day." He followed his father down the hallway, kicking at the floor.
Bilbo waited until they were gone before slipping from under the bed.
"Water-gate, eh?" He smiled. "I will have to find out about this water-gate." He left the room, quietly and on invisible feet. "Thank you again, Prince Legolas. This has turned out to be a rather good day for me!" He hurried down the corridors toward the cellars.
TBC
Author's Note
Yes. I know that Bilbo learned about the water-gate by lurking in corners and listening to the king's servants talking about it. But I changed it a little. Canon people I apologize, but hey! It is more fun this way.
Response to Reviewers
Anonymous - It is irritating when someone is standing over your shoulder telling you they need the computer, isn't it. That happens here all the time! Thank you for your comments on Master Tolkien. I love "The Hobbit" and have for more than couple of decades now. It was the first Tolkien that I had ever read and it got me royally hooked! I think that I, too, would have trouble living down all the "fun" Legolas has gotten himself into. And I am glad that you like the image of the proud Thorin as a petulant child pouting in the dark! That was rather fun!! As you have seen Legolas was blamed for Aralith's spider's mischief! After all how many spiders can there be in the palace?? (wicked grin) Cleaning anything for a prolonged amount of time can be boring!! And I serious doubt Legolas will every "play" with pipeweed ever again. As for playing with Gwibess..well, we shall see! And now for your next review! I liked the sourpuss part, too! He sure looked like one to me, hence the name! And yes, poor Aralith is having a rather hard time of it! Rather like myself when I am out of Raid and have a wasp fly into the house!! I am glad that some of Thranduil's reactions surprised you. I need to keep everyone guessing. Especially telling Brethil to shut up! Gotta love that! LOL means laughs out loud, lots of love, lots of luck. Rather a catchall phrase.
annakas - That chapter was cute and sweet! Everyone seems to think so! And yes, poor Aralith will be scarred for life because of that big bad spider dude! Or at least until Mithrandir shows up with more of his Magic Spider Spray!!
Nancing Elf - That was cute! And I'll just bet you want to sit on Legolas' hip and get spun around!! (smirks back at you though the same thought had crossed the author's mind!) I was glad Thranduil didn't pitch a fit either. He has had a few too many of late and it is time for him to relax and enjoy life a little! And yes, their punishment is over. Finally!! And you are right; with Brethil it is never a slip of the tongue! It is a way of life. And I swear on my copy of the Hobbit that I will not apologize again for "Hearts of Darkness"! I have done that too many times already. And yes, unfortunately life is tragic, nin mellon. But it is also fun!
queenie - I am glad that you enjoyed that chapter. I did, too! It was time for some fun in a lighthearted-no one-gets-in-trouble kind of way. And Thranduil would have had health problems if he didn't lighten up a little. He has been way to tense in this one!! I wish we could all have been at the party!!
Maria - It is strange isn't it how much we all love that Elf prince!! He has never had so many admirers before! And kids are always fun and Legolas is fun with kids! And Thranduil knows how to have fun, too. After all Legolas has to have gotten it from somewhere! I don't want this to end either. We shall see what I can come up with though I only see two or three more chapters ahead! Of course if I can prolong it I will!! We'll see. And as I read along in the Hobbit I see there are some things that need attending to, so maybe there will be a few more than two or three. And thank you for reviewing my other fics! Two in one night!! Wow! And you like Egla Ash's poetry!! Thanks again, you made his day!! And I think you have a life about like a lot of us here on Ff.net! We are strange and weird and loving it!! And don't worry. Unless my fingers fall off I won't stop writing!
Irena - Better than a sitcom?? Well, I hope so! Just joking.maybe. Some sitcoms are horrible! And yes, things can and probably will still happen! And oh, no!! You are not being reassuring about your story at all!! (gulps nervously waiting for the Author Alert to tell her that Irena has written another chapter!)
Rings of the cosmos - I find that spiders with big bloated bodies are so much creepier than the others! Though the big one in our back yard is like the ones in "8-legged freaks". I am not as afraid of them as I once was, but they still startle me especially when they are larger than they should be! We are going to see that movie next weekend! And I am weird and proud of it too!!!!!!!
Mitheithel - I do indeed know how hard it is to restrain laughter! Very very!! And I have found the harder I try to restrain it the worse it gets! I am glad that you are finding this so humorous! It has been a delightful romp in all! I know my family thinks I am nuts when I get so happy with my own ideas that I laugh about it.
JastaElf - Yes, it is nice to see Thranduil in action and having fun doing it! And I suspect that the spiders will be back! After all they are getting what they want! And I do promise not to apologize again!! I went a bit wacko with the apologizes! But Ai, Valar! That is life. I guess I need to take a couple lessons from the Berethath ned Faeg! (Queens of Mean) meaning you and Irena of course. (looks innocent "Who said that?? Me?? YGBK (you've got to be kidding!) I think you are mistaken!) *smirks* As to how far this story will go only Eru knows that! (grins)
Sake - So now you want Legolas and Thranduil to drink sake and get drunk! You are so wicked!! (grins) And seeing Gloin's reaction to his "princess" fighting with Orcs would be - dare I say - preciousssss.
CD - Thank you for reviewing!! And I am so glad that you find this so funny! I hope I can continue to keep you laughing.
Karina - That chapter was such bodacious fun to write!! I wanted a fun-no- shrieking-beast chapter and I got one. Only poor Aralith remained uptight! I guess I will have to do something about that wicked Remmith following him around! And t'would appear that I am not quite done. Just how far I will take it I do not know at present. I could take it through the Battle of Five Armies, but that involves some sad stuff and not so funny, so I don't know about that yet. We shall see.
Angaloth - Glorfindel is definitely my second!! And thanks for reviewing "Bells of Silver". I am slow in updating it I know as I am up to my neck in researching about Glorfindel and his past. I am not a First Age person, so I have to do a lot of reading because I want it to be right. It is so sweet that Brethil is on your list! He is thrilled! And I loved King Thranduil joining in on the fun, too!
No one - As you saw they did get "stuck" at the kids' table and a good time was had by all!! As to my spelling, I actually spell rather well, but I type terribly!! Some day I will actually reread my old stuff and fix all those typos! As to your forgiveness for my meanness, well I hope you will forgive me, but I won't apologize any more. I think some of my readers are tired of me apologizing for it again and again. And I am tired of apologizing. So please see fit to forgive me anyway!! BTW - I didn't know that 17 exclamation points were magic! Very cool!! And thank you for the nice email. Surprised me because that is not the email address I usually use!
Lakergurl 13 - The last chapter for me was the most fun to write thus far! Throwing berries is great fun and even Thranduil himself must admit that! (grin) Well, you can try to pay Thranduil for one of Legolas' remaining braids, but be warned!! He likes sparkly, expensive things!!
PuterPatty - First let me thank you for r/r - ing my old fics! I always check them for reviews even though at this point they are buried in the Ff.net archives and I am always amazed when people find them and like them! Of course now my review alert is working again, so that is nice! It sounds like you are OD ing on my stuff!! Valar, but I am honored! I did enjoy my cliffhangers quite a lot in them! (grins) And I could do with a bonus and a raise!! My imagination is on overdrive and in overtime at this point! It gets rather wearying!! I know that Legolas is rather OOC in this one, but it is too much fun!! I love him even more now, too, though how that is possible I do not know! And I can see where your mind is wandering!! Elf butts indeed! (shakes her head and grins again) And thanks! You Rock, too, nin mellon!!
LOTR lover - It was a refreshing break in that last chapter. But I am afraid things will be starting up again. (grin) And those kids are pretty sweet! All kids are! Well, all kids can be. (looking at her two little hellions who can be so sweet and so not sweet by turns)
Also to the person sent me the nice email - thank you! Since you didn't sign it I don't know what to call you ~ I guess I could call you and your friends the "Lord of the Rings Freaks" (grinz)~and I doubt you want your email address plastered all over ff.net, so I won't use it here. Any help with my Sindarin is much appreciated. I have so much to learn in that area! I am glad that you and your friends are enjoying this little tale of mine so much! I have a Legolas action figure, too, though he lives on the shelf by my bed!! And your report for your Spanish class sounds great! You should post it on Ff.net!! Thanks so much for your great compliments!!
BTW - Is anyone a member of the fan club?? And if so did you read in the third issue of the LOTR Fan Club Official Movie Magazine about the inscription on Arwen's sword?? I did and my first reaction was Wow!! Very cool! But then I actually thought about it. Her sword was Idril's (the mother of Earendil). And Idril was, of course, one of the survivors of the fall of Gondolin who accompanied the other survivors out of the city, which included Glorfindel whose place Arwen took in the movie!! Glorfindel was slain on Cirith Thoronath while fighting a Balrog when the survivors were ambushed on their trek through the mountains. Is that a slap in Glorfindel's face or what??!! Where is my shovel?! And the Shovel Brigade!!