Authors note : ok. This is technically Gail Carson Levine's idea, you know,
the story in Ella's fairy book. I have taken a lot of ideas from billions
of other stuff and I put this in the humour category, but if you don't
think its funny just tell me and I'll take it off that if I can, because I
kinda thought it was funny but then again I have a funny sense of humour.
Not funny as in funny, but funny as in peculiar, weird, strange, you know.
Oh yeah, I have absolutely no idea what I'm talking about when I talk about
cars, I asked my dad about that.
The Elves and The Shoemaker
In the time of ancient gods, warlords, and when all shoes were made by shoemakers, none were made by the disgusting factories that plunge toxic waste into rivers, seas, and oceans, inciting the assassination of animal and plant life world wide, and spitting out poisonous gases onto the streets below, resulting in agonizing death for everyone, and making the sky pour acid rain, eroding the entire earth leaving nothing but a tiny bit of liquid core about the size of a peanut, effectively causing the end of the world where . . . do you get the idea?
Anyway, in this glorious and joyful era, and in the land In Between Here And There, there lived - well quite a lot of elves, especially in the city, but in this particular story, we're talking about - three elves.
In the Trigansa Complex, on the outskirts of Lunar Crater City, apartment 702, 46th floor, number 18 . . .
An elf stood. Over there, admiring the way his dyed orange hair flopped over half of his eyes in the mirror, and posing on his imaginary catwalk. Michelangelo was his name. Thought he was the perfect vision of male beauty, he did.
Another elf, was bustling around in the kitchen, shaking beans into a bowl and slamming the fridge door after retrieving the milk.
" Hey you pompous, conceited, big headed nutcase." She called across the room to the orange head. " Will you hurry up? We got a job to do! " No reply, and no reaction. Adrianna grabbed the object nearest to her, with the intention of throwing at his head. This object happened to be . . . a banana. It twirled, slicing through the air, spinning, spinning, towards Michelangelo's head, where it would . . . WACK! . . . Ow . . . That must have hurt.
The last elf, Phep, relaxed on the sofa, acting as nonchalant as he could. The rat in front of him eyed him, then considered the large elf to be no threat to her, and continued to investigate the glue stick, whiskers twitching. As soon as she turned her back to him, Phep dropped the casual façade, and his orange eyes regarded her with deep suspicion.
" I know it was you." He said at last, suddenly, startling the grey rat, causing her to run and leap over furniture to get to the closest window. Phep followed, in time to see the rat jump out of the big hole in the wall. (The window I mean.)
" You stole my miniature Jaguar with a 5.0 CC engine complete with mega sound system and machine guns in the wings, the greatest creation in all elf kind. I WONT EVER BE ABLE TO MAKE IT AGAIN !!!" He shouted at the rat, now parachuting down all 46 floors.
" I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS !!!" He turned away from the window, disgusted with the sight of the rat making a quick get away, in HIS mini Jag.
These were the three elves, who would, in the future yet to come, help (or try to) the shoemaker and his wife, in escaping the cycle of poverty, and making them very, very rich.
The Elves and The Shoemaker
In the time of ancient gods, warlords, and when all shoes were made by shoemakers, none were made by the disgusting factories that plunge toxic waste into rivers, seas, and oceans, inciting the assassination of animal and plant life world wide, and spitting out poisonous gases onto the streets below, resulting in agonizing death for everyone, and making the sky pour acid rain, eroding the entire earth leaving nothing but a tiny bit of liquid core about the size of a peanut, effectively causing the end of the world where . . . do you get the idea?
Anyway, in this glorious and joyful era, and in the land In Between Here And There, there lived - well quite a lot of elves, especially in the city, but in this particular story, we're talking about - three elves.
In the Trigansa Complex, on the outskirts of Lunar Crater City, apartment 702, 46th floor, number 18 . . .
An elf stood. Over there, admiring the way his dyed orange hair flopped over half of his eyes in the mirror, and posing on his imaginary catwalk. Michelangelo was his name. Thought he was the perfect vision of male beauty, he did.
Another elf, was bustling around in the kitchen, shaking beans into a bowl and slamming the fridge door after retrieving the milk.
" Hey you pompous, conceited, big headed nutcase." She called across the room to the orange head. " Will you hurry up? We got a job to do! " No reply, and no reaction. Adrianna grabbed the object nearest to her, with the intention of throwing at his head. This object happened to be . . . a banana. It twirled, slicing through the air, spinning, spinning, towards Michelangelo's head, where it would . . . WACK! . . . Ow . . . That must have hurt.
The last elf, Phep, relaxed on the sofa, acting as nonchalant as he could. The rat in front of him eyed him, then considered the large elf to be no threat to her, and continued to investigate the glue stick, whiskers twitching. As soon as she turned her back to him, Phep dropped the casual façade, and his orange eyes regarded her with deep suspicion.
" I know it was you." He said at last, suddenly, startling the grey rat, causing her to run and leap over furniture to get to the closest window. Phep followed, in time to see the rat jump out of the big hole in the wall. (The window I mean.)
" You stole my miniature Jaguar with a 5.0 CC engine complete with mega sound system and machine guns in the wings, the greatest creation in all elf kind. I WONT EVER BE ABLE TO MAKE IT AGAIN !!!" He shouted at the rat, now parachuting down all 46 floors.
" I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS !!!" He turned away from the window, disgusted with the sight of the rat making a quick get away, in HIS mini Jag.
These were the three elves, who would, in the future yet to come, help (or try to) the shoemaker and his wife, in escaping the cycle of poverty, and making them very, very rich.