Comments: Thanks for the reviews! I'm glad some people actually like the story so far. I know its not that great, but this is my first fan fiction story so be nice and more reviews would be reeeeeallllly appreciated! So without further stalling ---*--- here is the fifth chapter!

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"Just let me die."

Duo just stared there wide eyed at the weak looking boy on the bed. It would have been amusing if not so serious. In the couple of hours he had been here Duo had seen more emotion from Heero than he had showed in all of the war. Anger, sadness, hurt, scared… he could see all of these play in Heero's mind. It made Duo's heart wrench at the thought of what he must have gone through for such a drastic change to take place. "H-Heer-."

Duo was cut off by a knock at the door.

After a second of silence, Quatre's opened the door and stuck his head in slowly, his eyes widened at the emotions radiating out of the room. He looked at Heero's frail form on the bed and couldn't choke back the sob that escaped from his mouth. He put his hand over his mouth quickly and backed into the hallway.

"Quatre! What the hell do you think you are doing?" Duo shut the door behind his as he stepped into the hall. "He is in enough emotional turmoil as it is, he doesn't need to see us breaking down as well."

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry I couldn't help it." He now was crying freely with tears running down his face. Quatre looked like he had just received his death sentence.

Pulling himself together quickly he wiped his eyes and took a shaky breath. Duo was staring at him with a 'I'm not in the mood to deal with this' expression. After finally calming down Quatre managed to speak.

"I- I thought you could use some blankets, and wanted to ask you if you wanted me to bring in an extra bed." He managed to squeak that out without his voice shaking too much. He then took a good look at Duo who was now pacing back and forth in the hallway. "Duo? Are you alright, you look a little pale."

"Ah… I'm fine, but do you think you can keep an eye on Heero for me. I think I need some fresh air." Duo walked away not waiting for a reply. He semi heard Quatre saying something about shifts on watching Heero but his mind was in too much turmoil to process any new information.

He found himself outside in a big garden thirty minutes later. There were apple trees arranged in a square, with other plants around them. In the center there was a big fountain with big square slates piled up in a jumbled order with points sticking out every which way. Water lightly poured down threw holes on all sides giving off a relaxing sound. This is where Duo sat thinking about what Heero had just said.

::Oh gods. I should have been here. I know I would have noticed his condition, but what if I didn't. What if I hadn't had that dream and never came here. Heero might be dead, he might… what am I going to do. Something's wrong here. He shouldn't have gotten this depressed for nothing. Why does he feel like he doesn't deserve to live? Why?:: He closed he eyes feeling the cool nights wind run threw his hair messy chestnut bangs. He laid down looking at the night sky and after what seemed like a couple minutes felt himself slowly dozing off.

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Heero sat looking at the door that closed behind Duo and Quatre. He had not liked the reaction Quatre gave when seeing him. ::I'm just hurting them again, all I can do is hurt people::

Quatre came in shortly after and sat down next to Heero. His eyes were red like he had been crying but Heero ask any questions. He quietly moved one of the cushioned sitting chairs next to the bed and sat there talking to Heero's silent form.

He could tell Quatre was hurting inside, from the way he talked. Everything he said was careful, as if not to trigger something to alarm Heero.

::He's treating me like a bomb that ready to go of at any moment:: He sighed and listened to Quatre rattle on about things he couldn't really tell what for he hadn't really been paying attention. All he could think about was how Duo had left. ::He's disgusted with me, I know it, all of them are. I can see it in there eyes, what is it? Pity? Sorrow? The Perfect soldier isn't so perfect anymore and they don't know how to handle it::

He faintly remembered Quatre saying goodnight and shortly after Wufei came in, he just then realized how zoned out he had been. Heero groaned as he saw him just standing there by the door with his eyes scanning him and evaluating the damage like he would evaluate his damn gundam for repairs. ::Oh gods, just go away I cant take this… Wufei must hate me, thinks I'm weak. Well I AM WEAK. I should not have even lasted the war. I wasn't suppose to last the war, never thought I would. ::

He sighed and finally took up the chair that Quatre had occupied. He then went on apologizing for not helping and all the other things Quatre had just said before Heero had spaced out. He almost laughed aloud in wondering if Trowa would do the same thing. Then he remembered that he didn't laugh. Laughing wasn't necessary in his life during the war and his training. Sure he had a good maniac laughs before but never the joy filled ones he use to see from Duo. He wondered what it felt like.

Wufei seemed to have caught a strange expression on Heero's face for he fell silent. Heero could feel the eyes trying to pry into him and it made him flinch, this made the young Chinese mans eyes widen in surprise for a second before returning to normal. But he never turned to look away even though Heero said nothing the whole time.

::Why are they watching me? They are probably afraid that I am going to kill myself once alone. Hmmm… well I don't blame them. But it is really unnerving how he is just sitting there staring at me like I'm some awful disease.::

Heero glared at him which brought Wufei to realize just what he was doing. "I'm sorry… I didn't mean to stare…"

Holding up a hand Heero motioned for him to stop. "Its alright, just don't look at me like that."

Wufei jumped to his feet and started rubbing his hands together nervously. "Oh my god! I didn't mean to… I'm sorry! I'm just not good at… well… I haven't really… this situation is… I don't know how to…"

Heero couldn't help it, he felt his stomach rumble followed by a strange choking sound. His face was feeling a little flushed. His shoulders started to shake and before he knew it he was laughing For a moment he didn't even realize it. But the sight of Wufei looking all nervous and stumbling on words was too much for Heero. He had never seen Wufei look so helpless, and he had never seen Wufei not know what to say. He found it funny, and the thought of him laughing made it even funnier. And for the first time in a couple months he felt something lift off his shoulders and he felt more relaxed.

He finally calmed down enough to see that Wufei was standing there stiff as stone staring at him like he just saw a miracle. And it might have been just called a miracle. Heero found himself loosing it again and he soon was curled into a ball laughing like he never had before. He faintly remembered Wufei running out the door, and that just made Heero laugh harder.

It seemed only a minute passed when Wufei was back with Quatre and Trowa in tow. They all stared wide eyed at a Heero who was now falling off the bed from laughing. He just couldn't stop, and all they were doing was making it worse. Now there were three people with the same expression Wufei had had earlier and Heero thought he was going to die. His stomach was aching so bad now, and he was trying to get his mind back in gear.

He was taking deep breaths trying to calm himself when Wufei finally spoke up. "What's wrong with him?"

That didn't help.

Heero found himself back on the floor all over again curled into a little ball making funny noises and trying desperately to choke back the laughs that were erupting from his soar throat. The funny thing was, that Heero didn't even know why he found this so funny. Maybe it was just the thought of what must be running threw the three shocked pilots minds as they saw him rolling on the floor.

::They must think I'm crazy.:: As much as he would have liked to been angry with that thought, he somehow found it amusing. ::Well I probably am crazy, god knows I'm not sane.::

After another minute of deep breaths and last minute laughs he finally calmed himself down enough to stand up. His stomach hurt and his throat was soar. He also noticed that his eyes seemed a little wet and they stung. He groaned clutching his stomach and looked at the three silent figures standing in the open door. "Why didn't anyone tell me how much it hurts to laugh?"

Suddenly they were all three brought back from their daze. Quatre managed a small laugh, Wufei looked puzzled, and Trowa had a smirk on his face that was so small any normal person would have missed it. Heero felt a funny feeling in his chest that he couldn't explain. But he liked it and didn't want it to go away. He soon realized how tired he was again. ::I must really be weakening::

Pulling on his emotionless mask again he walked over to his bed and slowly laid down. "I'm gonna sleep for awhile if that's alright." Heero gave them a look that dared them to argue with what he said. No one did. He closed his eyes and tried to make out the soft whispers from the others but he was already on his way to darkness. Before falling asleep he noted that the others had quietly left and Wufei was back sitting in the chair.

::He's probably staring at me again, but this time like I'm an awful disease that's gone insane::

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Wufei sat next to the bed staring at the sleeping figure. He could here the breathing slow and knew he was probably asleep now. He couldn't help himself, he stared at the frail figure of the once perfect soldier and strong boy. ::How did he get this awful. I never even realized, most likely because of the small changes each day.:: Before he could stop himself he put his hand on Heero's forehead.

"Shit! He's burning up." He jumped to his feet and out the door towards the den where he hoped Trowa and Quatre were. Luckily they were there and they stared at him as he barged in the door. Quatre looked at him with amusement as if to say 'What? is it another laughing attack?'

"I think we should call a doctor, he's burning up."

"I'll get our family doctor down here as fast as I can." Quatre bolted to the phone to make the arrangements. "Go get some water and a wash cloth, put it on his head to try and cool him down."

Wufei let Trowa handle that, and he headed out the door in search of Duo. ::Now if I were a braided baka where would I be?:: He almost chuckled to himself but then remembered that the situation wasn't a laughing matter. He searched for a while before finding Duo outside in the garden fast asleep. He sighed and picked him up trying not to wake him.

Duo stirred a little and Wufei held his breath, but Duo just mumbled something and fell back asleep.

Not knowing where else to put him, Wufei brought him to his own room and laid him carefully under the covers. Just as he was stepping out the door Duo started to mumble something in his sleep. He quieted and listened for a moment but all he caught was a jumbled "laufin… woulnt hurt ift ya… did mo' re."

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Can anyone guess what's going to be in the next chapter? J Perhaps a dream maybe?