25: All Together Now
Where to start? Well, the most exciting news I have is that Zell and Oonagh have been back together for a whole week and I've never seen the two of them happier. Walter seems to be doing well too. He hasn't gotten a new girlfriend but he likes it exactly the way things are now. Irvy and I have gotten so close since we got together. I could never imagine in my happiest dreams how much I love him and how much he loves me in return. It's really overwhelming. Then there's Quistis and Norris, Seifer and Angel, Fujin and Jake, Squall and Rinoa… Too much to tell!
Let me start with Squall and Rinoa. Squall has actually been very nice to the posse (I mean Seifer, Fujin, and Raijin) and I'm thinking it's because all the rest of us have made our peace with them. You would never know Squall was once an almost-silent warrior who didn't really care about anybody. Rinoa's changed him so much and I say, you go girl! Another cool thing about Squall is that he plays big brother to Jake. Watching those two together is a really scary thing. I know they're not brothers but… man! They sure do act like it!
Speaking of brothers, Zell and Konnor renewed their friendship and are "brothers" once again. Konnor's still a major flirt and for some "strange reason" he likes flirting with the girls who have boyfriends. He tried flirting with Xu but it didn't take long for him to change his mind and go for someone else. The guy is impossible but he has a good heart and has good advice about dating (he being the expert). Zell is a completely different story. I thought I knew my best guy friend pretty well but when he got back with Oonagh I learned there was a side of Zell I never got to know. He's still the same guy; I'm not saying he's changed drastically. He's just more… how he's supposed to be, I guess. It's hard to explain.
As for Nida, he's finally stepped out of his shell and revealed his true personality. It's not all thanks to myself and Quistis, but we played a major role in it. Since he was "adopted" into our little group he willingly opened himself up a little more each day until we all got to know the real Nida. He's now in the same "family" as Zell and Konnor. Really! They decided to make him their brother. Just another one of their insane ideas. Quistis… ah, she hasn't changed much at all. Except for the fact that she's crazy about Nida, she's the exact same.
I mentioned that Jake and Squall are treating each other like brothers and that's the truth. I can't really explain much about that. I'm sure Jake will tell me. Anyway, I'm happy to announce that Jake is going to take the SeeD test. I really hope he passes too. That would be so cool! Fujin's been a lot more open since she and Jake have been going out. She's made a lot of friends and I sometimes find her talking to strangers. Rinoa turned her into a shopping fiend. We all go out and buy things all the time. It's weird to think that we were once nothing more than acquaintances. I'm proud to be her friend, and Jake's too.
I saved Seifer and Angel for last because… well, I'll get to that. First the good news: Seifer has been put back on the disciplinary committee. What's even better is that he'll be taking the SeeD exam with Jake. Perhaps the coolest thing, however, is that he, Zell, and Squall are friends. Not very good friends, but friends nonetheless. Angel is still quiet and mostly keeps to herself. I think that's just her personality. She's perfect that way, because Zell, Konnor, and I do enough talking for everyone else. Seeing Seifer and Angel together is really a great thing. I think I've said this a lot since they became a couple, but they are so right for each other!
Two and a half months ago, I never would've guessed we would be where we are now. That just goes to show you how time can change people…
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Man, it's been crazy here! It's like we're all in this big soap opera or something! What with the Festival and all the shit I've had to put up with, it's a wonder I've stayed sane. I think now that all that bad stuff was worth it. Hell, I've had lots of good stuff happening to me recently that more than makes up for the bad stuff. Being away from Lene has made me realize how much I love her and how much I need to be with her. I would never have figured it out if we hadn't gone our separate ways.
Lene? Oh, that's Oonagh. It's my pet name for her. See, her middle name is Celene, and I just call her Lene for short. I'm the only one that does that, though. That was my pet name for her since the beginning. I'd love to tell our story but it's kind of long. I might tell it another time. It's a great story, really. My big brother's involved in it, of course, and my ma too. Well, anyway, that's for another time. I find myself humming Lene's song a lot. I guess it's our song now. At least we have one.
I've got another "older brother"! Yeah, really! Konnor and I decided to make Nida our brother. Nida's a bit older than me so he's the middle child. I'm the youngest! Yay! Konnor and I have been brothers for over two years; it'll take a while before Nida can truly be a brother of ours. I like Nida. He's really cool. I just wish he wasn't so damned quiet all the time! He's never gonna match up to me and Konnor if he keeps quiet like that! Hopefully with our supervision he'll get to be a bit louder.
Urgh, I can't believe I'm going to say this… I'm friends with Seifer. Yeah, that's right. Seifer and I are friends. He and I will never be able to be great friends with each other. We didn't even get along that well in the orphanage. But at least we can walk down the hall together without getting into a fight or cussing each other out. We had what girls like to call a "sleepover" and he and I got into the biggest pillow-fight of all time. It started out with just us, anyway, then Konnor decided to join in, then Jake, then Irvine, and even Squall swatted his pillow at us a couple times. What a blast!
Irvine and I are getting along as well as two guys that get into fights all the time can. The funny thing is that he and Konnor get into fights too. You'd think they'd get along! I mean, they're both flirts! Well, Irvine was but I think Sellie's beaten that habit out of him. Anyway, he and Konnor set each other off easily. I kind of get the feel for how my fights with Irvine look. Other than that they're pretty good friends. Irvine and I still have our skirmishes. I don't think we'll ever grow out of it. I'm kind of glad I'm rooming with him 'cause… well, he did play a big role in getting me back with Lene.
A lot has changed, and a lot has happened, but it all turned out okay in the end. Thank Hyne for that.
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I have something to say.
When all of this started, I never expected that the end result would find me back in the arms of the one man I truly cared for. I feel badly for leading Walter on, but I was lonely and depressed after my breakup with Zell. I suppose Walter was an easy target. I went out of my way to apologize to him recently; apparently he was none the worse from the experience and assured me that all was well. Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I had stayed with Walter. I am glad I did not. I belong with Zell.
Oonagh Celene Dincht… I love the sound of that….
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How could I tell her? I fell for her the instant I spotted her, even was so bold as to ask her to the Festival without even knowing her name. She knew all about my past and still she chose to dance with me, to smile at me, and to put her arms around me. Is Hyne so kind? She truly is an angel and I… I really do………….. Oh, I don't think I can say it! It's such a strange word to say. It doesn't seem right somehow to express my emotions this way. Could this one word really hold such an emotion?
I honestly have never felt this way before. Rinoa was a crush, really. Nothing big. This is something else entirely. I don't just want to be with her. I want to protect her too. I care about her on the same level as my other friends, and at the same time there's a deeper level in my heart for her. I want to tell her how I feel. Things like this shouldn't be bottled up inside. How can I, though? It feels like if I say the wrong thing then that's it. That's the only chance I get. I know that's not true but that's how I feel.
"Angel?"
"Hmm?" She gazed up at me, her eyes shining. Dear Hyne, she's beautiful. As I gazed at her I had the sudden image of a gun pointing at my head. What if somewhere out there, someone still hated me for what I did? My actions were inexcusable but I had long repented of them. But still, what if? I couldn't put her through that. But… I just had to tell her!
"I… uh, I love you." Before while I was thinking about what to say, those words didn't seem right. After I said them I realized that was exactly what I wanted to say.
"Seifer… I love you, too." I was too happy for words, too happy for anything. I just stood there smiling, and holding her hand in mine.
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I hold a very deadly weapon in my hands. With a gunblade I can cause pain. I can kill people with my weapon. With this same weapon I can protect people. I would much rather prefer the latter. The thought of blood staining my hands sends shivers down my spine. I don't think I could bring myself to touch Fujin knowing my hands were like that. How can Squall live knowing he has ended people's lives? I guess that's the sort of thing you get used to in war.
I joined the Garden soon after the defeat of Ultimecia. From day one I wanted to be a gunblade specialist like Squall. I got in the Garden and was caught up in a whirlwind called the Garden committee. My wish came true, however, and I was even so lucky as to train under the master himself. I guess I rubbed off on him because after a while he treated me like a brother. Almost to the point where I called him "brother" once and got away with it. I wasn't too comfortable with that so I stuck with calling him by his name. Zell and Konnor can act like brothers; that's fine with me. It's just not something I'd like to do, especially if it concerns Squall. I admire Squall and although I don't want to be exactly like him, I do want to be somewhat like him.
Fujin holds a deadly weapon in her pale hands. I once asked her if her hands ever felt stained with blood. She gave me a sad look that spoke volumes more than words ever could. What brought us close together was one time in the library she started quietly sobbing. It was sudden and I didn't know what to do for her. All I could think of was to hold her, so that's what I did. I had heard stories of her and how strong she was. In my arms she became weak and helpless, a young woman who needed someone to love her. My heart went out to her in that moment. SHORT, BUT TRUTH, as Fujin would say. I love her. I really do.
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All this lovey-dovey stuff is makin' me sick, ya know? I'm really happy for my sister and all my friends, but a guy can only take so much! I can't even hang out with Zell without risking a mushy scene. As for Seifer, he and Angel are inseparable, ya know? I told 'em they might as well get hitched 'cause they already act like they are. Still, I wouldn't trade a single day of happiness that my friends get to have now for all the days we spent in the past unhappy. They're my friends, so I can deal with it. I'm just glad they're happy, ya know?
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Reneigh… I wonder where you are?
It's not like I haven't been trying to find you. I sent letters all over the place. I've been looking. Hyne, please don't let Reneigh be dead. My little bro's back with Oonagh so now it's my turn to reunite with my only love. If I can ever find her…… If I had known I would never see her again, I would've done something differently. That was why I was so determined for my bro to not give up. I just wanted to protect him from what could happen. That's what a big brother does.
Hey, speaking of brothers, should I……….? No, maybe for some other time.
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My name is Selphina Marianne Tilmitt. I'm eighteen years old. I have two best friends, Zell and Oonagh, who are crazy about each other. I have a really handsome, sweet boyfriend named Irvine Kinneas. He used to be a big flirt before he and I got together and luckily he hasn't gone back to his old ways. Zell has an "older brother", Konnor, who's a really big flirt. He and Zell are a lot a like, so much so that I wonder whether or not they're related.
There are too many stories to tell of all the things we've done once we all got to be friends. We've been through a lot together. That's how life goes: pleasures and pains make up each day and through the help of friends we survive the lowest lows and celebrate the highest highs. I can't begin to tell all our stories but I think I told the most important one: how we got to where we are.
Someone once said "all the world's a stage". If that's true, those days I just finished describing were like a dance. A dance that brought us to our knees, that lifted us up, and grew us together. I couldn't take lessons for this kind of dance, but I discovered that the best part of life is what you don't plan for. I'm not perfect but on the stage of life I'll dance my heart out. That's how I think life is meant to be lived.
~Fin
Closing comments: I sincerely hope you enjoyed this story. I tried to make the narrators fairly obvious in this chapter so I hope you know who's speaking. Thank you for reading! I'm highly considering writing a prequel to this story but I'll only do it if enough people are interested.