"Music is moonlight in the gloomy night of life."
-Jean Paul Richter
A few days after my audition, the choir was at the local zoo to sing as promotion for the upcoming West Side Story. There was still a good half hour before the concert but Mrs. Lucas was looking panicked as she tried to count heads on the small outdoor stage.
"Chad! Where did you get that? Put it back immediately!... No, I don't think it wants to go home with you... okay... there's Jason, Dan, Andrew..." she muttered to herself, checking of names on a piece of paper. I was sitting quietly in the soprano section, which Mrs. Lucas was standing near. She suddenly turned to me. "Christine have you seen Erik? I can't seem to find him... in fact..." she frowned thoughtfully, "I haven't seen him since we passed by the butterfly exhibit... could you go see if he's there, please? We need everyone on the stands in fifteen minutes for warm-ups..." Having rattled that off, she turned back to her list.
I sighed and headed towards the exhibit at a brisk walk. I was a bit worried what I should say to him when... no, if I found him. Erik had the inexplicable ability to disappear into thin air when he wanted to. He had acted a bit tense with me ever since he found out that I had gone out with Rod even though nothing (not even a kiss) had happened between us. He barely spoke to me during school and was even silent during my voice lessons, limiting his responses and commands to one curt sentence or less.
The butterfly exhibit was in a small glass building with lots of trees and other plants inside. I walked in and almost immediately spotted Erik's tall, thin frame near a tree.
"Erik?" I bit my lip, twisting a strand of hair around my finger. A few of the multicolored insects flitted by, landing on a few flowers near me.
He turned slowly and put a long finger to his mouth. Daintily poised on his other hand was a butterfly. It gently opened and closed its fragile wings, completely unaware that the hand it was on played piano and violin with equal grace and expertise. Entranced, I walked towards him and gazed with wonder at the delicate creature. I raised a finger as if to touch it and Erik ever so gently brushed his hand against mine. Wide-eyed, I watched as the butterfly fluttered over to my outstretched finger. He smiled, a real smile, at my childlike awe and his mismatched eyes seemed to glow.
"It's beautiful..." I breathed, totally caught up in the magic of this place.
Erik glanced at me. "Beautiful..." he agreed softly. The little creature fluttered away but I couldn't help but feel as though I had been granted a special gift by having touched a butterfly.
"I've always been fascinated by butterflies..." he said, watching a few fly by. "That such a lovely living thing started out so ugly and unassuming..." And then, almost to himself: "When I was little, I once pretended that I was a caterpillar... all I needed was a little time and then I would be a beautiful butterfly... free to fly away from the rejection, the horrified stares..."
The euphoria I had felt from the pure oxygen used in this room faded. Erik wrapped himself in his ever-present black trenchcoat as if to ward off the consuming loneliness that seemed to pervade his very spirit... "Erik?" I started and when he turned, the visible side of his face was so sorrowful that my words faltered. "H-Have I offended you somehow? You've been so... so quiet with me... that I thought... I've done something wrong..."
Perhaps the euphoria was returning because I thought I saw Erik's eyes glimmer with unshed tears. "No..." he whispered and then for a timid instant our eyes locked and his hand reached up to my hair... and then returned with a butterfly perched on his finger. "We wouldn't want to leave with this little stowaway in your hair, would we?"
I blinked and laughed a little, the spell broken. "No... I forgot to tell you, Mrs. Lucas wants us back right away."
That night after my lesson as I was exiting the theater I heard, whispering ghostlike from the auditorium, the mournful strains of Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata. I stood in the deserted, dark and dusty hallway, listening as Erik's soul played on until the last sad chord was struck and all was silent.