By Tekkenicus
Disclaimer: Metal Gear Solid is a trademark of Konami, so unless I end up owning the company due to a strange twist of fate, it ain't mine.
Chapter 2: On The Way To Otacon.
(Snake returns to the main Armory, now with guards 25, 26 & 27)
Snake: Shit! Guards!
Guard 25: O_o? huh? what was that noise?
Snake: Uh-oh *runs down to the bottom-left container and enters it*
Hmm? 3 packages, but with some strange lines on the ground, best make a
call *codec call*
Campbell: Snake, that room is set with infra-red sensors- if you touch
them, you'll alert the guards and they'll pop a cap on your ass
Snake: Comprende?
Campbell: They'll shoot you
Snake: ...that could mean so many things
Campbell: THEY'LL KICK YOUR ASS!
Snake: Oh, well, can't leave here at the mo until I find a clear route
Naomi: Maybe if you used your thermal goggles, you could see where
the beams from the sensors were
Master: (cutting in) I have a better idea- why don't you use your Thermal
Goggles? that way you could see where the beams from the sensors are
Snake: Ah Master, you are so insightful ^_^ I'll take your advice
Master: *evil voice* excellent- I mean *Miller voice* Excellent
Naomi: hey! I said that!
Snake: Stop trying to take Master's glory Naomi! >: (
Master: She's a mean woman alright
Naomi: >: () *end call*
Snake: *puts on his thermal goggles* Bingo! able to crawl under them
easily! *crawls under the beams and obtains a Famas, with ammo* there,
finished *gets up, right in the middle of the beams I advise that
you crawl away from the beams, being the smart person that you are...maybe-Tekk>*
*siren*
Guard 26: What the-? SOMEONE'S IN THE FAMAS ROOM!!!
Guard 25: I thought it was the PSG1 room!
Guard 27: You're both wrong! It's the Nikita room!
Guard 26: There aren't any sensors in the Nikita room!
Guard 27: There should be!
Guard 25: You dumbasses!
Snake: *sneaks out of the room, head for the elevator while they're
looking away and heads for the Tank Hangar* phew! jeez! what IS up with
these guards? Anyway, how to call Meryl?...*codec call* *sighs* back to
the codec I go.
Meryl: Who are you?
Snake: What do you mean 'who am I'? you called me!
Meryl: Well, there's no other way on how you're gonna find my frequency!
Snake: Guess so, anyway, I was really impressed on the way you busted
yourself out of the cell
Meryl: The one from the prison?
Snake: You ARE the Colonel's niece, Meryl, right?
Meryl: How do you know my uncle?
Snake: Well, it was a summer's day at Sneaking School, I just got back
from swimming lessons when he started up the 'retrieve a rubber brick from
the bottom of the pool in your pyjamas' mission, and-
Meryl: I get the picture. Just exactly who are you?
Snake: I'm Davi-
Meryl: AH-HA! Are you Snake? The Solid Snake
Snake: I guess you can call me that
Meryl: The Legendary Solid Snake, you? *whips off her balaclava*
sorry about before, I wasn't sure if you were one of the good guys
Snake: Well I knew you were
Meryl: How could you tell?
Snake: It's your eyes...
Meryl: They're rookie's eyes, right?
Snake: No, well...yeah, but I was gonna say beautiful and compassionate
eyes
Meryl: ...are you trying to chat me up?
Snake: Maybe, though the real me is no match for the legend I'm afraid
Meryl: Yeah, right! I bet you rock!
Snake: well...I have my own .45 calibre pistol to show you later ;)
Mei-Ling: You ho! >;(
Snake: ?
Meryl: Who was that?
Snake: No idea *ahem* anyway, how did you get here?
Meryl: Well, they needed some extra troops here before the revolt,
but then we got mullered by the revolutionaries, and I got thrown in prison
for beating up a guard
Snake: That Johnny guy?
Meryl: No, his brother, Biff
Snake: Oh, anyway, do you have the card keys from Baker?
Meryl: Yep
Snake: I'm surprised that you managed to hide them from the guards
Meryl: Well, these guards are pretty shy to strip-search 'everywhere'
on a woman- they didn't even check my cleavage for one
Snake: Hmm, a whole lotta people would definitely wanna see you hide
those keys over a webcam
Meryl: What does THAT mean?!
Snake: er...nothing.
Meryl: Anyway, how's Baker hanging?
Snake: He's dead- heart attack- same as the Darpa Chief
Meryl: WHAT?! aww damn! cos for hostages, they were pretty well hu-
Snake: O_o
Meryl: Ah, forget it.
Snake: Do you know where they might be keeping Dr Emmerich?
Meryl: Somewhere on the 2nd floor basement of the Nuclear Storage Building
I think, that's where his lab is.
Snake: I see, how do I get there?
Meryl: You have to go through the Tank Hangar's cargo doors, complete
with infra-red sensors that, if you trip them, will seal off all exits
and release poison gas into the room, then up the mine-infested canyon,
into the Nuclear Storage building, where if you're caught, more gas is
released- the sentries are safe because they have gas masks, then take
the elevator from there. Simple as that!
Snake: o_o;;;;;;;;;;; er, what's the number of those cargo doors?
Meryl: 5, but don't worry, I have a Level 5 card- I'll open them up
for ya
Snake: Thanks- anyway, I gotta head off now, you find a place to hide-
I heard its really sunny in Cancun or Acapulco round this time of year
Meryl: I'm going with you!
Snake: Tough tittie! you ain't! You're too green!
Meryl: I am not!
Snake: Yes you are! you're as green as the grass grows, as green as
the leaves sprout, and various other vegetables and plants and weeds and
things
Campbell: Anemone or Clematis juice can cause a rash
Meryl: UNKY ROY!!!!!!
Campbell: ICKLE MEWUL!!!!
Snake: Hey! save the reunion stuff for later! I've got a mission to
fulfil!
Meryl: I'm sorry Snake
Campbell: Me too Snake
Snake: You pause for one second in front of the enemy and you're finished!
Good luck doesn't last forever!
Meryl: I don't know why I couldn't shoot at first- I've done all the
VR training, and passed all the missions- I even completed Metal Gear Solid:
VR Missions/Integral! But then, I thought about my bullets piercing through
those soldiers bodies and their fluids spilling on the floor- kinda reminds
me of this dirty story I once read about some sexy videogame characters.
Snake: Shooting at targets and shooting at living, breathing people
are different. Unfortunately, killing is one of those things that get easier
the more you do it- I should know, accidentally held a traffic warden hostage
when he tried to put a ticket on my car
Meryl: You accepted a ticket?
Snake: Hell no! I knocked him out and dumped his unconscious ass on
a park bench, roughed his clothes up a bit and gave him a newspaper blanket
Meryl: You turned him into a Big Issue seller?
Snake: Right
Meryl: You're a real bastard!
Snake: Well, I did say that the real me was no match for the legend
Meryl: *chuckles*
Snake: *chuckles back*
Meryl: Ok, ok, I'll let you go on ahead, me being the good girl that
I am- I'll call you when I've opened the doors, ok? Also, my frequency
is 140.15- don't forget it.
Snake: Ok, see ya
Meryl: Bye *puts on her balaclava**ends call*
*elevator doors open at the Tank Hangar*
Snake: Ok, now to *codec call* answer this call -_-
Meryl: *takes off her balaclava* Snake, I've unlocked the cargo doors
for you
Snake: Great job! where are you?
Meryl: Where-I-can-see-ya! *nyah!*
Snake: Don't move around too much, or you'll be spotted
Meryl: Don't worry- I'm disguised in this enemy uniform *puts her balaclava
on*
Snake: Not for long if you keep swinging your ass while you walk
Meryl: Huh?
Snake: Er, nevermind
Meryl: Ok, so we'll meet up at the Nuclear Storage Building
Snake: HEY! YOU SAID YOU'D STAY PUT AND BE A GOOD GIRL!!
Meryl: I've changed my mind!
Snake: Don't get careless! that's when things get sour!
Meryl: Sorry Mullet-man, but this is the only way I can find out if
I'm cut to being a soldier
Snake: These guys are professionals! you're gonna get yourself killed!
Guard: *butts in on his own codec* whyyyyy hellllllooooo Sholid Shnake!
I'm the maaaagical man from Shushex! weeeeee!
Snake: ....I'll meet you at the Nuclear Storage Building
Meryl: ^_^ *ends call*
*cargo doors open up*
Snake: Hmm, gonna need some items though *looks around* door number
2-level 2 card.....number 2, card 2.....number 2, card 2.....*makes a codec
call*
Snake: Naomi, will my level 2 card open that door with the 2?
Naomi: Of course Snake
Snake: Ok, just checking *ends call*
Snake: *rushes over to the door with the 2 on bottom floor, upper
right hand corner-nearest cargo doors>* Oh damn, a guard!
Guard 28: zzzzzzzzzz
Snake: ah good, he's asleep *walks carefully over to the box near the
guard and picks it up* Socom Suppressor eh? be able to kill guards without
alerting anyone...*looks evilly at the sleeping guard*
Guard 28: *sucking his thumb* no, I don't wanna go to school today
Mommy! I wanna watch cartoons!
Snake: Nah, not worth it *walks out from the room, then hides to the
side of the nearest pillar*
Guard 8 (the one walking around the spare M1 tank) I still wish we
had some music going on still :(
Snake: (quietly) awwww
Guard 8: *walks up the right-hand side of the tank*
Snake: *sneaks up behind him*
Guard 8: ...I've got the feeling that I'm being wa-urggh! *falls to
the ground, dead*
Snake: *twirls his Socom around* hehehe, easy pickings *goes up into
the top left-hand corner to pick up Socom ammo, then up the stairs, dodging
the camera in the same way from Chapter 1>, then across the
platform, up against the side of the wall separating upper door 4 and upper
door 2*
Guard 9 (the one who was walking around the M1 Tank being assembled):
hey, where'd number 8 go?
Voice on Intercom: EY! BATTYBOY! GET BACK TO YOUR POSITION, AIIGHT?!
Guard 9: *gets back to his patrol route, getting close to Snake*
Snake: *equips Socom* and now for dead guard number....oh, I've lost
count!
Guard 9: *turns his back on Snake* ah, what a view! wish I was outside
tho-AGH!
Snake: heh *waits for the surveillance camera to turn away, then runs
into the other door, full of computers, and the Mine Detector* hmm? *looks
closely at one*
Website: 'These Girls Will Do ANYTHING!'
Snake: ...-_- I think I'll just take the Mine Detector *picks up the
Mine Detector, then leaves the room and across the platform, dodging the
surveillance camera's, via their blind spots and pass the cargo doors in
front of the first infra-red beam* these must be the beams the Colonel
and Meryl were talking about *codec call* ...I think I'm getting used to
these frequent calls
Meryl: *takes off her balaclava* watch out Snake, that room has infra-red
beams coming out from the walls. You probably can't see them with your
naked eyes, but they're there.
Snake: I know, you told me about them earlier, remember?
Meryl: Oh yeah....who are you again?
Snake: Solid Snake
Meryl: The Legendary Solid Snake???
Snake: graagh! *ends call*
Snake: *puts his thermal goggles on* ah crap! they're all going at different speeds!...feel giddy...must save game...*calls Mei-Ling*
Snake: Yo! save mah game biatch!
Mei-Ling: Hah! I think not! you killed my father! prepare to die! *ends
call*
Snake: day-amn! guess I'll have to take it a couple of steps at a time
*watches the first beam, walks under it* phew! there goes beam number 1,
now beam number 2...damn it's fast! *runs under it* phew! beam 3 *runs
under* beam 4 *runs under* beam fi-
Vulcan Raven: *in tank* get-on-with-it!
Ocelot: *near his torture machine* yes! get on with it!
The Soldiers in Communications Tower A: YES! GET ON WITH IT!
Snake: hey! this is a very delicate procedure here! one wrong move,
and I'm toast!
Liquid: *from wherever he's hiding out* get on with it! dear brother!
Snake: Ok, ok! *exits through the opposite cargo doors into the snowy
canyon, walks across beside the small rocky mounds to the left when- guess
what?-another codec call*
Deepthroat: S'up nigga? dere be Claymo' mines round dere, use a Mine
Detector!
Snake: Who are you? and why do you sound like the Darpa Chief?
Deepthroat: Jus' call me....'Deepthroat'.
Snake: ...why? you like the taste of-
Deepthroat: shut up bitch!
Snake: Anyway, you don't seem to be using burst transmission, are you
nearby?
Deepthroat: Shut up man! dere's a tank waitin' to ambush yo' ass and
make it extra-crispy!
Snake: Who the hell are you anyway?
Deepthroat: One of your fans! *ends call*
Snake: A fan of mine called Deepthroat- now I've seen everything! *equips Mine Detector, walks around to between the rocky mounds on the left, then head forwards when....*
*M1 Tank drives out in front of him*
Vulcan Raven (Raven): This-Is-Raven's-Ter-rit-tor-ree! Sn-akes-don't-be-long-in-A-las-ska!
I-will-not-let-you-pass
Snake: *mocking* oh-no, I'm-going-to-be-blown-up-by-a-slow-talking-berk!
buh-oo-hoo-hoo!
*tank turret turns, main gun barrel aiming at Snake*
Raven: send-him-a-message
*gun fires a piece of paper at Snake, Snake looks at it*
Snake: 'are you free for tomorrow night?'
Raven: &*^&! I meant, fire-a-shell-at-his-ass!
*tank fires a couple of shells at Snake, Snake leaps out of the way,
back between the rocky mounds*
Raven: ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-haa! Serves-you-right-for-making-fun-of-my-speech!
*gets back in the tank*
Snake: *glaring*
Raven: COME! LET'S FIGHT!
Snake: hmph- easy pickings *throws chaff grenade out first* Ok.......*looks
from behind his rock, see's the Tank, doing nothing*....hmm.....*twiddles
thumbs*....*looks out from behind his mound at the Tank*
(inside the Tank)
Raven: what-can-he-be-way-ting-for?
Guard 29: I dunno Vulcan- shall I look up out on the hatch for him?
Raven: hmm, I-don't-know. I-kinda-want-guard-30-up-there-first
Guard 30: why me?!
Raven: Because-you-are-feeling-up-my-leg
Guard 30: I am? I thought that was the hand brake
Raven: grrr, I-am-sur-round-ded-by-im-beh-ciles!
(back with Snake)
*chaff grenade explodes*
Snake: Finally! *equips regular grenades and runs towards the tank*
Raven: There-he-is! fire-the-main-gun!
Guard 29: I can't! the radar on him isn't working!
Guard 30: I'll go up and get him with the machineguns!
Raven: .....you-do-that -_- Driver! try-and-run-over-him-by-driving-in-a-frustrating-way
Driver: Aye aye capt'n!
Guard 30: aha! Time to die Snake!
Snake: You die you a-hole! *throws grenade into the hatch near Guard
30*
Guard 30: NYAAAAAAHHHH!!!! *blasts a fire of bullets at Snake*
Snake: *dodges them* ha ha! you missed me! *gets knocked down by the
tank* agh! crap!
Guard 30: hahahaha-URGH! *blown out of the hatch by the grenade*
Snake: Yes! I win! I win! *does a dance of victory* that's the way,
uh-huh uh huh! I like it! uh-huh uh-huh!
Guard 29: see how you like this! ...uh-huh uh-huh! *blasts a fire of
bullets at Snake*
Snake: *dodges them, throws grenades into the hatch again* eat fragmentation
grenade you jerk!
Guard 29: Kiss my-AAAAAAGHHHHHH! *tank turret blows up, throwing guard
29 out onto a snowdrift*
Snake: *drags guard 30 next to him* hmmm *takes a card from Guard 29's
pocket* level 3 eh? I'm heading up in the world...*places guard 29's hand
on guard 30's 'hiney'* heeheehee! ^_^ *heads towards the cargo entrance
of the Nuclear Warhead Storage building*
Raven: *coming out from the defunct tank's hatch* well-boss, I-hope-you-are-hap-pee,
he-got-the-card
Liquid: My advertising card for Liquid's Hairdressers?
Raven: No, the-card-that-opens-up-the-stor-ridge-bill-ding
Liquid: Oh, what did you think of him?
Raven: He-is-just-as-you-said, In-bat-ul-he-is-as-if-po-sessed-by-a-dee-mon
Ocelot: He may be gone now, but I will kill him!
Raven: So, Gen-ner-ral-I-van, I-heard-he-took-your-mas-tur-bay-ting-tool-as-well-as-your-dig-nit-tee
Ocelot: Hey! watch your tongue you oversized prick! I've no idea why
I helped you into FOX-HOUND now!
Raven: hurhurhurhurhur
Liquid: Don't kill him yet- we'll have some more fun with him
Raven: He-and-I-will-meet-a-gen
Ocelot: Same prediction as always buttmunch?
Raven: Yes, the-ray-ven-on-my-head...it-thirsts-for-his-blood!!!
Mantis: *Darth Vader voice* The force is strong within you
Raven: shut-up-you-weed!
(in the NSB)
Snake: More people dead! Joy of battle! Oh yes! Ok, back to work now
*ahem* *walks up steps and all the way down the platform to the greeny-yellow
window-checking the place out with his scope* hmm, guard on the upper platform
near the elevator- another one walking around the perimeter of the floor,
and another walking around a truck- with a surveillance camera nearby,
but not pointing towards the entrance- easy pickings! *de-equips scope
and runs back across the platform, down the steps and towards the main
entrance*
Snake: Ah crap! I have to crawl under here? grr >: ( *flattens front-down
on the floor and crawls underneath the door* oh damn! there's the guard
from the perimeter *crawls back under until the guard has passed*
Guard 31: *the one Snake is avoiding* *humming 'The Birdie Song'* nummanummanumma-nah,
nummanummanumma-nah, nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh, nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh, nummanummanumma-nah,
nummanummanumma-nah, nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh, nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh
Snake: damn, I'm gonna have that song going through my head all throughout
the mission now! *crawls under the door when the guard isn't looking* there,
easy as-*codec call* oh great!
Campbell: Snake, you must not use any weapons in there!
Naomi: Chill Colonel! I made the nanomachines in his body prevent him
from doing so
Snake: WHAT?!? how can I fight without them?!
Naomi: well, only for that floor- can't you see where you are?
Snake: Nuclear Warhead Storage Building- can't see anything wrong with
that
Naomi: NUCLEAR WARHEAD Storage Building! can't you see that?
Snake: ...oh crap!
Campbell: They're all dismantled though- with their detonation devices
removed
Snake: No problem then- let me use my weapons!
Naomi: They might be leaking plutonium though, and THAT could cause
problems
Campbell: So DON'T use your weapons on that floor! *ends call*
Snake: great! *runs to the far left of the floor and into the bottom
left-hand corner- picking up the grenade pack, and then hiding in the shadows*
now to wait for that guard on the perimeter...I think, could just run up
the-*spots the guard coming back along the upper platform*-ok, I can't
just now -_-
Guard 32: *walking around the truck* I hate this patrol route! 31!
Guard 31: Yes?
Guard 32: You wanna switch routes?
Guard 31: Ok *takes 32's route*
Guard 32: Thanks *takes 31's route* ah finally, a much better route
*walks past the hidden Snake*
Snake: O_o *walks up the stairs carefully* uh-oh, another genome!
Guard 33: hmm? *shrugs and walks back along the platform*
Snake: *creeping carefully behind him*
Guard 33: I have the strange feeling that I'm being followed...*shrugs
and walks past the elevator*
Snake: ha! loser! *presses the elevator button numerous times*
Elevator: *ding!* (doors open)
Snake: *walks in and chooses floor B1* *codec call*
Meryl: *taking off balaclava* It's floor B2 Snake! not B1!
Snake: I know, I'm just checking around this floor for some 'items'
Meryl: *shakes head, puts her balaclava back on* *ends call*
*elevator doors open at the 1st floor basement*
Snake: *runs into the Level 3 door, into the centre of the room-picking
up the Socom ammo, then crawling under the computer table, obtaining Famas
ammo*
Computers: *sounds of orgasmic female groanings and moanings*
Snake: mmm, babeh! ^_^
Guard 35: *walks past Snake's hiding place*
Snake: eyah! *runs out from hiding place, into the room- picking up
the Nikita launcher and missiles- then hides under the desk in the room*
easy pickings!
Guard 35: Hey! I object to this moment! this is getting boring here!
Guard 34: *walks in, zipping up fly* yeah! all I'm doing is pissing
in the sink!
Guard 35: you're supposed to piss in the urinal! you dumbass!
Mantis: *in commander's room* GET ON WITH IT!
Guard 35: *sighs and goes back on his patrol route*
Guard 34: *runs back to the toilets*
Snake: bunch'a losers! *runs out of the room after Guard 35 passes
by*
Guard 35: I hate this job y'know! I should've played the part
for Johnny Sasaki! But nooooo! They had to find the reaaaall thing!
Guard 34: Your turn on the urinals
Guard 35: *growls*
Snake: *gets in the elevator and heads for the 2nd floor basement*
maybe I should've done this on hard mode...no no! I'm only saying!
Author: darn! *gets rid of the elevator security camera gag*
Snake: Thank you!
*Elevator doors open*
Snake: *walks out, flattens against right wall and hear's a funny sound*
huh?
Otacon: What was that?
Snake: Are you Dr Emmerich?
Otacon: Am I Oscar Merich? what are you talking about?
Snake: Who's Oscar Merich?
Otacon: Huh?
Snake: Just forget it! *leans off the wall and heads through both level
3 doors, stopping in front of the electrified floor* jeez, what's this
funny gas? making me light-headed-glaiveng! *codec call*
Deepthroat: Watch out foo'! dat place be filled wit' gas! also da floor
is electrified! First destroy da high voltage switch.
Snake: How? I can't reach it from here Mr Static Screen-glaiveng
Deepthroat: Use a remote-controlled missile foo'!
Snake: Hey, Mr T! *hums the theme to 'The A-Team'*
Deepthroat: ....*ends call*
Snake: remote control missile? all I have are these Nikita thingies *fires one* whoa! hey! I can control the missile! *drives it all the way down, then turns it to the left of the screen, then up past the gun camera's, around the table past the other gun camera, to the side of the next gun camera's vision cone, up through the opening, turning right and into the high voltage switch*
(at a power storage facility in Alaska)
Employee: Hey! there's been a cut on Shadow Moses!
Supervisor: Hmm, make a report on it
Snake: weeee! the floor's going crazy and has stopped fizzing *stumbles out of the gassy hallway and back out from the doors* whoo! *deep breaths* that made me go crazy for a second..urggh- I don't feel too well...gotta be a gas mask somewhere...*calls Meryl*
Meryl: *takes off balaclava* what's up?
Snake: D'ya know where a gas mask is?
Meryl: ....nope *puts on balaclava* *ends call*
Snake: thanks for helping! guess I'll have to try every door....and
choke on the gas -_- ...what's that shimmering?
Grey Fox (Fox): Oh shit! (runs into the gas-filled hallway)
Snake: hey! stop right there! *runs after him into the gas room* ah
crap- light headed again! must find mask! *checks nearest door, pick up
items* no mask...*checks next door, won't open* evil sons of...*check the
next door*...oh crap! camera!
Fox: *slashing a guard* GET ON WITH IT!
Guard: yeah- urgh!
Snake: ...that's getting slightly old now...*throws Chaff grenade into
the room*..hey, what's that blue bar saying O2 on it? and why is it slowly
getting smaller?
*chaff explodes*
Camera: *robotic voice* DANGER! DANGER WILL ROBINSON! LOST IN SPACE!
*plays the Apollo 4-40 soundtrack to the 'Lost In Space' movie* MATT LEBLANC
BIZNITCHES! W00T!
Snake: *picks up the Gas Mask and leaves the hallway again to regain
fresh air* *pants* goddamn!
FWD >>- *Snake gets info on gas mask from Nastasha, picks up items from the room on the left in the level 3 doors, running past the gun camera's in fast motion, chasing girls with big boobs in skimpy suits to the Benny Hill theme tune, then crawling past the camera near the door with 'Hal's Lab:Keep Out' sprayed on it via the blind spot, then entering the door*....PAUSE II ....PLAY >
Snake: *takes off gas mask* ah, fresh air, how I miss thee!
Guard's voice: FREEZE! *splitch* urgh!
Snake: Huh? *enters through one door, then the next* ah jeez! it's
scenes like these that warp children's minds and gets the PTC blaming TV
shows! hmm..*looks at the guards, all slashed and bleeding*.they look as
if they were cut by some type of blade *codec call* hmm?
Campbell: No shit Einstein! *ends call*
Snake: ...well, that was helpful -_- *hears a strange sound close by,
sounding like electrified slop-jamming his radar. Walks forward to see
a guard staggering*
Guard 36: i..i...it's a ghost! eh! *falls to the ground and bleeds
visceral gore all over the floor*
Snake: yuck! *picks up ammo when he hears gunfire and a scream* sounds
like the time I went crazy at that S Club 7 concert-wish I hit the little
fuckers! grr *looks around the corner and see's a guard hovering above
a shimmering image, looking as if he's in pain*
Guard 37: urggh! when I said I'd like a long smooth object in me, this
isn't what I imagined *slammed onto the floor* ugh!
Fox: *appears and spins his sword around- walking through the door*
Snake: *makes a call*
Snake: That Ninja...
Naomi: Bro?
Snake: That Ninja! from earlier! I'm sure it's him!
Campbell: Oh crap- Emmerich's in danger! go after him dammit! *ends
call*
Guard 37: *breathing on the floor-teetering between life and death*
hey m-m-man! could you fulfil a guy's d-d-dying wish?
Snake: what?
Guard 37: ....err....nevermind-ugh! *dies*
Snake: *blinks and runs after Fox*
End of Chapter 2
*Insert Chapter 3....wait, I already did that joke*