"I wish they would only take me as I am."
-Vincent Van Gogh
"Erik?" My voice sounded very small and nervous in the dark, empty hallways of the school. Ahead, I thought I heard the whisper of a silk cape and I ran towards it, holding up the low hem of my dress so I could run freely, hesitating a little when I saw a door labeled "Roof: No Students Allowed" hanging slightly open. I groped my way up the pitch black, spiral staircase, exhaling with relief as I stepped out onto the roof of the school and felt the cool night air on my cheek.
I spied Erik's huddled silhouette, a black shadow against the star-studded sky, just beyond an air conditioning duct and walked towards him silently. I stood awkwardly behind him for a long minute before he spoke without turning.
"I suppose you missed your chance to scream at my face down there, go ahead, do it now." All the power, the charisma that had I knew his voice to be was gone; it was lifeless and dead sounding now. I was silent a moment because I didn't want to reveal the shame I felt. I admit it now... because Erik had been right in that heat of anger when he had accused me of wanting to rip the mask off his face... I had wanted to see his face... and now that I had, I was deeply ashamed at thoughts that I had entertained. I berated myself silently before speaking.
"I will not scream at you, Erik," I said finally, collecting myself. He whipped around to face me, unbelieving. I sucked in some air through my teeth but other than that, my face was perfectly composed at the sight of his ruined face. The skin was stretched tautly over that side and had a sickly grayish hue that comes without exposure to sunlight. His nose... oh my... was half gone, as if it hadn't had enough time to grow. It had half of the bridge but the tip and nostrils were missing, leaving only what appeared to be a thin sheath of skin that prevented his face from having a gaping hole where a nose should be. There was also additional scars that seemed to have been made later in life.The most noticeable one was long and jaggedly violent, running from the corner of his mouth, over his eye, and ending at his hairline.
When he saw that I did not run away or cringe from him, he simply turned back around but I sensed that I was now welcome. Cautiously, I approached and stood beside him silently, offering whatever comfort my presence might provide.
"I... I was born with this... face... cursed from birth to live a dismal and lonely existence," he started bitterly after a long moment, not looking at me. "I never knew my real parents, I was abandoned in a dumpster at birth with nothing to my name." A short harsh laugh escaped his lips. "I didn't even have a name!" I was perfectly quiet, aware of how hard it must be for him to dig up painful memories. "For some odd reason, I was 'rescued' and turned in to Social Services. Although at most times in my life I thought that I should have died in that dumpster, along with the other trash..."
I gasped and reached out to touch his arm, but pulled back when he flinched. "Don't say things like that, Erik!" He looked at me with red-rimmed eyes and my heart twisted when saw the despair that was so deeply imbedded in his soul from a lifetime of pain. "Y-you'll never know how much you have changed my life for the better..." Our eyes connected and he turned away but not before I saw a single glistening tear run down his sunken cheek.
"When I was six... I was in a home with five other boys, all older, who made it their daily hobby to torment me... one day, they held me down... and locked me in a cage, poking me with sharp sticks, like I was some kind of rabid animal..." His voice slipped and he breathed deeply for several moments, regaining his composure. "Do you know, Christine, that I've never stayed in a foster home for more than three months? No one wanted me for long... When I turned eighteen, a few days before the first day of school, my last foster family kicked me out. They can do that in this state, you know, they no longer have legal responsibility of me once I become an adult... They gave me ten dollars. Luckily, I was allowed to keep the clothes I had managed to buy for myself. That's also why I couldn't be in the orchestra, not enough money for a violin..." His voice slipped into regretful remembrance as I too recalled his amazing talent.
"Where did you go?" I asked, deeply moved by his story but feeling clumsy and awkward. How could I even hope to help him?
"I was desperate... and on the first day of school I saw that the school theater was empty, not even a janitor in sight... I moved in. You wouldn't believe how many little secret passages and rooms there are in that building that no one knows about. The architect must have been an eccentric..."
I thought of my "secret" room and smiled. "But I'm not this 'Theater Ghost'..." he continued firmly, clenching his fist tightly. "I'll admit to a few ventriloquist tricks but I've done nothing wrong. I would never hurt you..." His other hand reached up and for a heart-stopping moment I thought that he was going to brush my cheek but he stopped himself and merely ran his hand through his thick black hair, unruly in the faint breeze that whispered around us. "I don't know who it is, but I'm afraid for you, Christine."
I turned away from him for a moment, gazing out at the night sky twinkling with bright white stars. "I owe you an apology, Erik. I had no right to pry into your past and even less of a right to doubt you... especially since you've shown me nothing but the utmost kindness and courtesy..." I felt, rather than heard, him come up behind me and I almost felt the gentle pressure of his hand hovering above my shoulder in an invisible caress.
"I shouldn't have yelled at you... and I certainly didn't mean to imply that you and Rod... I was angry..." he replied, trailing off, his voice husky. "I-I'm not used to having friends, I hardly know how to act most of the time when I'm with you." You could take me in your arms and never let go. My cheeks warmed at this unbidden thought and I was glad for the moment that I wasn't facing him. All was quiet for a moment until I heard a slow song drift upwards from the courtyard and surround us.
"I was going to ask you down there, but I didn't have the opportunity..." he began after a brief silence, I turned. Erik was holding out a trembling long fingered hand. "May I have this dance?" I moved towards him and he shyly opened up his arms, which I went into, putting my arms around his neck and feeling my heartbeat quicken as his gentle hands found their place on my waist. Slowly, we danced under the starlight and when Erik pulled me forward, I didn't protest but only accepted his tentative offer and laid my head upon his chest. I heard his heartbeat through the snowy white shirt of his tux and I closed my eyes when the strong arms encircling my waist held me closer.
Everything seemed to fade around me until I was only aware of our hearts beating together in a silent duet. "Christine..." he practically sang my name and I looked up, my heart skipping a beat at the look in his mismatched eyes. I don't know what might have happened but my chin was rising unavoidably towards his when I heard one word that shattered the spell.
"Christine?" Abruptly, Erik's warm presence was gone and I was left clutching my arms, shivering at the sudden cold. Rod came up with a barely discernible frown in the darkness. "I've been looking for you..." He glanced around the roof. "Did I just see you with someone?" I didn't answer. Rod shrugged, took my hand and led me off the roof. As we went down the stairs, Erik's voice murmured in my ear. "Goodnight, Christine..." Rod didn't seem to hear it and I smiled.