A Blond Joke
BY:chica hottie
Summary: Jack ticks everyone off with a stupid blond joke.
Spoilers: none just happens when Jonas is part of SG-1.
Disclaimer: I do not own Stargate. I only own this story idea |:-)
Authors note: If your reading my story Roswell, it was updated a week or so ago. But its a few pages in. Just sayin cause it felt like the usual readers wern't reading (or reviewing!)
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It was a rainy afternoonat Cheyenne mountian, but Jack never noticed. He was 28 levels under ground. And he was as happy as one person could be. He was on the internet. The one place where he could be who ever he wanted to be and right now he was on a chat room.
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dude_: hey can I ask u a question
col_lv_sc_: whatever
dude_: alright read carfully. pretend ur the bus driver.
col_lv_sc_: what!?
dude_: just pretend u r. now at the first stop 7 people get on an empty bus. then 2 miles away at the next stop 4 people get off and 11 people got on. they continue up the road road for 5 miles till they get to the downtown area. 6 people got off and 12 more got on. The bus goes three blocks north which was.3 miles. 4 people get on and 8 get off. Fianally .2 miles away the rest of the people get off and the bus driver goes home. What color is the bus drivers hair?
col_lv_sc_: What!? that had nothing to do with the other stuff!
dude_: what color was the bus drivers hair?
col_lv_sc_: ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
dude_: what color is your hair?
col_lv_sc_: er..............brownish.................greyish
dude_:are you sure your not blond?
col_lv_sc_:yea. why?
dude_: uh cause you got my blond joke thingy wrong.
col_lv_sc_: what?! a blond joke thingy?
dude_: uh yea u were the bus driver.
col_lv_sc_:oh
dude_; funny huh?
col_lv_sc_:................... g2g.......................
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Jack thought it was funny but he couldn't believe that he fell for it. He thought about his team and what they would say since Sam was blond and Jonas was almost was. He even wondered what Teal'c would say cause he had no hair. But he went to try.
X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X
"Hey Carter, whacha doin?"
"Finishing an over due report sir."
"Oh....... well can I ask you a question? It kinda has a story to go with it."
"I guess."
"Alright, pretend your the bus driver"
" What?! A bus driver?!"
"Yea now," Jack forgot the numbers so he just made them up " at the first stop 6 people get on the bus. Then the bus drove 8 miles up the road. When it stopped, 4 people got off and 12 people got on. The bus drove 5 miles to the downtown where 7 people got off and 6 more got on. They drove around 3 blocks which was .3 miles till 3 people got off and 9 got on. Fianally they drove around the block which was .1 mile and everyone got off. Wh.."
"Sir, please hurry I have to do this.''
"Okay I was almost done. Anyways, what color was the bus drivers hair?"
"huh?"
'damn, if she couldn't figure this out no one can' Jack thought.
"You don't know what color the bus drivers hair was?
"No''
"How about blond?" 'oh crap she is blond, oh well this just proves she really is'
"I still don't get it."
"Well you were the bus driver."
"Oh that was funny"
"Dont feel bad. I got the blond joke wrong too."
"A blonde joke?"
'oh crap shes getting pissed' "Uh yea thats what the guy who told me said it was."
"Sir do you happen to realize I am blond? You know I could take that offencivily."
"No not until a few seconds ago."
"Yea well I'm mad now. I don't like blond jokes."
"Sorry" 'must be PMS' he thought
"Yea you better be or else I could shove this keybord right up your a..."
"Im leaving now. see ya later."
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Jack may think Jonas may find some humor so he went to tell Jonas the Joke thing. So jack told Jonas and here is what happened.
"....what color was the bus drivers hair?"
"Uh, I dont know."
"Maybe blond?"
"Why blond?"
"Because the bus drivers stupid."
"I still dont get it. Are blond people supposed to be stupid?
"Do you not know the history of blond people on this planet?"
"No"
"Well a long time ago, people belived that blond people were stupid, so now we make jokes about it."
"Really? Well I'm not stupid."
"Its just a joke."
"Yea, a not very nice one."
"Oh you blonds."
"I'm not blond, I'm light brown."
"Dirty blond"
"Oh well, I still didn't like that. Don't tell Sam."
"Uh.... I already did."
"You did?"
"Yea I thought she would think it was funny, but she got really mad."
"Well shes a blond. What did you expect?"
"Well most blonds think they are funny and don't care. Now I know two people would get mad."
"Yes you do"
"Well Im gonna go, laterz"
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"Teal'c!" he turns around, " I've been looking for you."
"What do you need Colonel O'Niell?"
"Nothing, just wanna tell you somthing. Do you appriciate humor?"
"Yes I do. It helps me learn about your people."
"Ok, cool. do you know the history of blonds on this planet?"
" Blonds like Major Carter?"
"No not her, just blonds in general?"
"No I do not"
"Well a long time ago people thought blonds were stupid. I am not saying that they still are, or ever were, but us humans make jokes about it. Just for fun. And we don't really mean what we say cause Carter is VERY smart."
"Okay now I understand."
"Cool. Now I'm gonna tell you a story with a question at the end okay?" Teal'c nods his head.
"Pretend your the bus driver."
"Is a bus driver one who drives a bus?"
"Yea, anyways.." so Jack tells Teal'c the story.
"What color was the the bus drivers hair?"
"The bus driver has no hair"
"You get it?!"
"Yes, I was the bus driver wasn't I"
"Yea. Well your the only person to get it." Teal'c had a smile on his face.
"Do you know anymore blond jokes Colonel O'Niell?"
"Yea I do. Did you hear about the one that went to the store to buy the TV in the window but it really was a microwave? The two walked off having fun like good friends do.
~FINI~
Did you like? Plz Review!
BY:chica hottie
Summary: Jack ticks everyone off with a stupid blond joke.
Spoilers: none just happens when Jonas is part of SG-1.
Disclaimer: I do not own Stargate. I only own this story idea |:-)
Authors note: If your reading my story Roswell, it was updated a week or so ago. But its a few pages in. Just sayin cause it felt like the usual readers wern't reading (or reviewing!)
X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X
It was a rainy afternoonat Cheyenne mountian, but Jack never noticed. He was 28 levels under ground. And he was as happy as one person could be. He was on the internet. The one place where he could be who ever he wanted to be and right now he was on a chat room.
X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X
dude_: hey can I ask u a question
col_lv_sc_: whatever
dude_: alright read carfully. pretend ur the bus driver.
col_lv_sc_: what!?
dude_: just pretend u r. now at the first stop 7 people get on an empty bus. then 2 miles away at the next stop 4 people get off and 11 people got on. they continue up the road road for 5 miles till they get to the downtown area. 6 people got off and 12 more got on. The bus goes three blocks north which was.3 miles. 4 people get on and 8 get off. Fianally .2 miles away the rest of the people get off and the bus driver goes home. What color is the bus drivers hair?
col_lv_sc_: What!? that had nothing to do with the other stuff!
dude_: what color was the bus drivers hair?
col_lv_sc_: ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
dude_: what color is your hair?
col_lv_sc_: er..............brownish.................greyish
dude_:are you sure your not blond?
col_lv_sc_:yea. why?
dude_: uh cause you got my blond joke thingy wrong.
col_lv_sc_: what?! a blond joke thingy?
dude_: uh yea u were the bus driver.
col_lv_sc_:oh
dude_; funny huh?
col_lv_sc_:................... g2g.......................
X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X
Jack thought it was funny but he couldn't believe that he fell for it. He thought about his team and what they would say since Sam was blond and Jonas was almost was. He even wondered what Teal'c would say cause he had no hair. But he went to try.
X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X
"Hey Carter, whacha doin?"
"Finishing an over due report sir."
"Oh....... well can I ask you a question? It kinda has a story to go with it."
"I guess."
"Alright, pretend your the bus driver"
" What?! A bus driver?!"
"Yea now," Jack forgot the numbers so he just made them up " at the first stop 6 people get on the bus. Then the bus drove 8 miles up the road. When it stopped, 4 people got off and 12 people got on. The bus drove 5 miles to the downtown where 7 people got off and 6 more got on. They drove around 3 blocks which was .3 miles till 3 people got off and 9 got on. Fianally they drove around the block which was .1 mile and everyone got off. Wh.."
"Sir, please hurry I have to do this.''
"Okay I was almost done. Anyways, what color was the bus drivers hair?"
"huh?"
'damn, if she couldn't figure this out no one can' Jack thought.
"You don't know what color the bus drivers hair was?
"No''
"How about blond?" 'oh crap she is blond, oh well this just proves she really is'
"I still don't get it."
"Well you were the bus driver."
"Oh that was funny"
"Dont feel bad. I got the blond joke wrong too."
"A blonde joke?"
'oh crap shes getting pissed' "Uh yea thats what the guy who told me said it was."
"Sir do you happen to realize I am blond? You know I could take that offencivily."
"No not until a few seconds ago."
"Yea well I'm mad now. I don't like blond jokes."
"Sorry" 'must be PMS' he thought
"Yea you better be or else I could shove this keybord right up your a..."
"Im leaving now. see ya later."
X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X
Jack may think Jonas may find some humor so he went to tell Jonas the Joke thing. So jack told Jonas and here is what happened.
"....what color was the bus drivers hair?"
"Uh, I dont know."
"Maybe blond?"
"Why blond?"
"Because the bus drivers stupid."
"I still dont get it. Are blond people supposed to be stupid?
"Do you not know the history of blond people on this planet?"
"No"
"Well a long time ago, people belived that blond people were stupid, so now we make jokes about it."
"Really? Well I'm not stupid."
"Its just a joke."
"Yea, a not very nice one."
"Oh you blonds."
"I'm not blond, I'm light brown."
"Dirty blond"
"Oh well, I still didn't like that. Don't tell Sam."
"Uh.... I already did."
"You did?"
"Yea I thought she would think it was funny, but she got really mad."
"Well shes a blond. What did you expect?"
"Well most blonds think they are funny and don't care. Now I know two people would get mad."
"Yes you do"
"Well Im gonna go, laterz"
X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X
"Teal'c!" he turns around, " I've been looking for you."
"What do you need Colonel O'Niell?"
"Nothing, just wanna tell you somthing. Do you appriciate humor?"
"Yes I do. It helps me learn about your people."
"Ok, cool. do you know the history of blonds on this planet?"
" Blonds like Major Carter?"
"No not her, just blonds in general?"
"No I do not"
"Well a long time ago people thought blonds were stupid. I am not saying that they still are, or ever were, but us humans make jokes about it. Just for fun. And we don't really mean what we say cause Carter is VERY smart."
"Okay now I understand."
"Cool. Now I'm gonna tell you a story with a question at the end okay?" Teal'c nods his head.
"Pretend your the bus driver."
"Is a bus driver one who drives a bus?"
"Yea, anyways.." so Jack tells Teal'c the story.
"What color was the the bus drivers hair?"
"The bus driver has no hair"
"You get it?!"
"Yes, I was the bus driver wasn't I"
"Yea. Well your the only person to get it." Teal'c had a smile on his face.
"Do you know anymore blond jokes Colonel O'Niell?"
"Yea I do. Did you hear about the one that went to the store to buy the TV in the window but it really was a microwave? The two walked off having fun like good friends do.
~FINI~
Did you like? Plz Review!