GOODBYE MAY SEEM FOREVER

Timeline: Post TPM/ Pre AOTC

Genre: Drama

~*~


Master Obi-Wan Kenobi entered the apartment that he shared with his Padawan Learner, Anakin Skywalker. Once he was inside the adequately sized apartment, he noticed his apprentice. Anakin was standing in the center of the room with his hands clasped in front of him and his head down. Confused by the young Jedi's odd stance, Obi-Wan moved closer to him.

"Padawan, what's the matter?" He had been Anakin's Master for close to a year now, however he still was working on forming a close mental bond with the boy. He hoped that soon he would be able to read the emotions that his apprentice had.

"Uh...there's some...um...news for you." The Jedi Master waited patiently as Anakin fidgeted around trying to get the news out. "You will...um...want to...ah...play the message." With that, the young boy turned and stood next to the message machine.

Obi-Wan cocked an eyebrow at the odd display that his Padawan had just done, but played the message nonetheless.

A tried and sorrow filled voice came out of the recorder.

"Master Kenobi. This is Master Guilda Flurse, I am...uh...was Bant's Master. I wanted to tell you that...ah...two nights ago while we were on the planet Jumes, she was struck with a vibro ax and...killed. I'm sorry I couldn't give you this news in person, but I am still here trying to make arrangements. I'm truly sorry for the loss of your friend." The message died without another word.

Obi-Wan stood by the machine in shock. Bant's dead? The thought did not even make sense in his head.

My best friend's...dead? Suddenly, he felt a small tug on his sleeve.

"Master, are you okay?" He forgot that his Padawan was standing right next to him.

He looked down at the boy and answered truthfully. "No. I'm sorry. I must go." With that he left Anakin in the room, while he went out somewhere- anywhere.

He finally found himself at the Rooms of a Thousand Fountains. That was no surprise for it was Bant's favorite room. The Jedi Master took a seat on a rock and dipped his feet in the water as he thought over the message he had received.

His best friend from his early days at the Temple was dead. The impact of the news finally hit the young Master and he brought up his knees to his chin. His body racked with soft tears that he did not try to cease as he let the sorrow of Bant's death wash over him.

Finally, his tears stopped and he was left with thoughts of her. She always understood when he had a run-in with Bruck or one of his friends. She helped him, when he had come back without a Master from Melida/Daan, to understand that he had to be patient and all would work out. She listened to him as he told her about Cerasi and her death.

Most of all though, she was there when he had come home without a Master, again. However, that time it had been under a much different circumstance.

Bant had been away at a mission when she gained the news of Qui-Gon's death and within two days she had jumped on a ship and headed back, just to be with Obi-Wan. He remembered he was sitting in a chair, while Anakin was in a class, thinking over the faithful fight. He had been so engrossed with his thoughts, he failed to hear the door slide open.

The next moment, he felt Bant throw her arms around him. "I am so sorry for your loss."

The young Master had been so surprise and delighted to see her, he had forgotten about his pain for a moment. He stood and embraced her. Obi-Wan smiled to her, but she only bit her lip back. He had forgotten about his appearance. In the past few days since his Master's death, the young Jedi had not slept well. He knew he had red rimmed eyes with bags under them.

Bant took Obi-Wan's hand and spoke to him. "I am truly sorry for Qui-Gon's death and only wish there was something more that I could do for you. I want you to know I am here for you. If you need to yell at someone, I can be yelled at. If you want to talk with someone, I can be talked to. And if you just want to cry, I can cry with you."

Obi-Wan looked into his best friend's eyes and before he knew it, he was crying against her tunic. Since his Master's death, other Jedi had said kind words, but no one had offered their shoulder to cry on. Bant had and it was all the young Master needed.

Over the next week, Bant helped out with Anakin and anything else he needed. Finally, though, she had to leave and said her good-byes, telling Obi-Wan that when she got back to the Temple again, they could go out and spend more free time together. Obi-Wan had agreed with her and also said his thanks and good-byes.

That was the last time he had seen her.

Now, there was no one for Obi-Wan to yell with, talk with, or cry with. He was alone.

/You are never alone, Padawan/

The young man's head popped up at the voice and he looked around frantically. He knew he had heard something.

/We are here for you when you need us/

Now, Obi-Wan knew he had gone crazy, but he went with the voice anyway.

"Then why are you here with me now? I need you now! I don't want to be alone anymore. I'm stick of always losing the ones close to me." He paused collecting his thoughts. "I just want happiness again."

The statement and its truth made Obi-Wan dropped to sit again. It was the most honest thing he had said in a long time. He had not been truly happy since his Master had died. There, of course, had been moments of small joy with Anakin or other Jedi, but never anything that did not dim away in a few hours.

He missed the joy he got sparring with his Master. He missed the joking and laughing with his Master. He missed the water fights with Bant.

He missed his happiness.

Off to the side, the young Master was so caught up in his own thoughts he failed to notice the two beings who were standing next to each other.

"Please can we go to him. He needs us now. Look at him, he is dying from the inside."

"I'm afraid, if we do it will only be for a short time."

"That's all he needs."

Obi-Wan became aware that others were in the room with him and made a quick effort to wipe away tears on his face. He stood to face the visitors....

...and nearly fell into the water with surprise.

In front of him, basked in a blue light, was his Master and best friend. They both smiled at him and Bant even did a small wave.

"What...ah...ah...what...are...hhhaa...um" The string of incoherent words rolled out of Obi-Wan's mouth before anything sensible made it. "How?"

The one word, expressed the only question that Obi-Wan's mind could make.

"I told you, Padawan, there is no death, only the Force. Bant and I are one with the Force, however we felt it was time to visit you if only for a moment."

Obi-Wan slowly moved forward to the two ghostly forms and stare each of them in the eyes.

"It really is you!" The joy that spread over the young Master's face made both of the figures smile in return.

"I'm afraid we must be short, though. This is just a brief meeting. We must get back to our lives on the other side." Qui-Gon spoke slowly to his Padawan. "You are grieving for us, which is fine, yet it is consuming your whole life. You must not allow that."

Bant stepped next to the Jedi Master's form. "Please Obi, go home and speak with Anakin, he is worried and confused for you. This past year has not been easy for him and now today with you rushing out on him. He is a mere boy, he needs someone to be there for him."

Obi-Wan felt new tears spring to his eyes. "What about me? Don't I need someone? I've lost the two people who mean more to me than life in the last year. The two people I regarded as my family have left me." The young Master brought the back of his hand up to his eyes and wiped away the tears. "When do I get a chance to have someone to hold me and allow me to cry?"

Obi-Wan looked back to the two dear people to him when they remind silent and he spoke again. "When do I get to love someone who doesn't leave me?"

The question was asked with such anguish and pain that neither ghost knew what to do or say. The young man before them was dying from the inside and they were powerless to help him. Qui-Gon moved and knelt next to his apprentice.

"I am sorry you have to go through this pain, my Obi-Wan, but it is the will of the Force." As soon as the statement left Qui-Gon's mouth, the younger Master sprang to his feet.

"The will of the Force? Damn the Force! Why is it the will of the Force that I am stuck here to suffer? Why is it the will of the goddamn Force that I'm stuck with Anakin, a boy that even after a year, I cannot get close to! Tell me, if you feel it is the will of the Force, tell me why!" Obi-Wan turned his back to the two spirits in angry.

Qui-Gon softly spoke from where he was. "I am not sure why we left you. I wish it was not this way. I wish I could have been with you during your Knighting. I wish I could change everything that happened on Naboo. But I cannot. I just want you to know that your life is not over yet, Padawan. You are here for a reason and I know that you will do something great." The older Jedi sighed. "Perhaps, it is not the will of the Force that we leave, moreover, the will of the Force that you live."

Bant moved closer to her friend. "You are a wonderful person and deserve to be happy in life. Please don't let our deaths make your life painful. You have Anakin and he will be there for you if you need him. You must have trust in him and learn to accept that trust. He may not be your Master, but you are his and he needs you."

Obi-Wan turned and looked from his Master to Bant and back again. He loved this people with all his heart and knew they spoke the truth. He did have Anakin and he did have his life.

"Thank you both for being there for me in life and in death. I love you both more than you can know." Obi-Wan smiled at the two dear people to him.

"I love you too, Padawan. And will watch over you always, my son, " with that sentiment his Master faded until there was only empty space where he once stood.

Bant took a deep breath. "I will watch out for him, don't you worry. Love you so, I do and miss you, I will."

Obi-Wan let out a small laugh at the childhood memories Bant brought back with her play Yoda-speak. "Miss you, I already do. Love you always, I will."

Bant gave a small wave and slowly, she too faded, leaving Obi-Wan alone once again. After a few moments to collect his wits, the young man turned and headed back to his chamber.

He entered the room and found his Padawan mediating on the floor. The boy opened his eyes when he heard his Master enter.

"Are you all right?" Anakin stood and moved closer to Obi-Wan.

The young man bent down so he was eye to eye with the small boy. "Yes, I am getting better. Thank you for your concern, Padawan."

Anakin bit his lip and Obi-Wan knew he wanted to say something more. "Yes?" He hoped if he prompted the boy, he would speak.

"I was just...um...wondering who Bant was? But if you...um...don't want to talk about it I...um...understand." Anakin let his eyes dropped when Obi-Wan stood and moved over towards the couch.

The young Master flopped on the couch and beckoned his apprentice over. Anakin obeyed and sat stiffly next to his Master. Obi-Wan threw an arm over his shoulder and pulled the boy closer. The Master and Apprentice leaned into one another. Anakin worked his head into the crock of Obi-Wan arm.

"She was a great friend to me at the Temple when I was even younger than you were. We had some pretty good times here." Obi-Wan looked down to Anakin. "Would you like to hear them?"

The young boy nodded his head. "I would enjoy that very much, Master."

Obi-Wan smiled. "Well, there was this one time..."

The Jedi Master told stories of his past childhood pranks, problems, and memories for hours until his apprentice fell asleep against his arm. He softly picked up the boy and moved his into his room. He placed him in his bed, covered the young Jedi up. Bending over, he gave him a small kiss on his forehead.

"Good night, Padawan. Sleep well." The older man left the room and was unaware of the two figures regarding him.

The taller and older one turned to the young figure. "I think he'll be just fine."

The younger one looked up and smiled. "I think you may be right. Shall we get back to our game of chess?"

Qui-Gon looked down at Bant with a mischievous smile. "I don't see why you want to play again. I'll only beat you."

Bant rolled her eyes. "I think not."

Both figures faded off into the darkness. Obi-Wan stepped back into his apprentice's room and softly whispered.

"You'll never beat him, Bant. He always wins at chess."

The End.