The True Lion

Tears

Gosh, I can't stop pacing. Why did I do this to myself? Telling her to come over, that I'd tell her the truth. What am I going to do? We'll break up if I don't tell her. I love her, but how can I do this?

I know she deserves to hear it. But what could it do? It could get us both killed. And what if she freaks? What if she doesn't trust me?

I have to calm down. I feel like my heart's going to jump out of me. I hate this, I really do. Why do I have to be a freak? Why can't I just be normal?

My brain is completely disagreeing with my heart. My heart says, 'You love her, tell her the truth'. But my brain is telling me to leave Garden, now.

Deep breath, Squall, deep breath. I have to calm down.

Oh, no. She's here. I can hear her before she even knocks. Her footsteps, her breathing. It's all so distinct.

She taps on the door and says, "Squall."

Okay, I can do this.

The door opens, and there she is. Of course I have to let her in. She sits down and looks at me. I feel like her eyes are piercing my soul.

She's so beautiful.

"So, what is it?" she asks

Snap out of it, you moron. Talk to her.

"I…um…" Gosh I sound like a dork!

"Squall?"

"Yeah…" I sit across from her on the couch. Gotta stay calm.

She looks at me expectantly.

"Um…I guess I should tell you." Oh, I'm a huge idiot.

"Yeah." She replies

I internally kick myself for being such a stupid wimp. Tell the woman already!

I open my mouth, but it won't work. My vocal cords won't even move.

She sighs, "Look, I'm tired of this. Tell me the truth, or we're through. Please, Squall. I just want to know. I won't hurt you."

He voice is comforting, but she has no idea what she's asking me for.

"Alright," I manage to say, "This will take awhile, okay?"

*************************************************************

She won't look at me now. So much for telling the truth. Please say something, please!

She shakes her head.

"Rinoa, please."

"I don't know what to say, Squall. This is pretty big."

"I know. I'm so sorry." Tears, oh crap. Tears are trying to flow.

"I just…I was so scared. Please don't hate me. Please." I beg

She looks up at me. She can see that I'm fighting tears.

Her face softens, "Squall."

She reaches out and touches my face. "Hey."

That's the trigger. A few tears manage to flow down my cheeks.

I can see tears in her eyes, too.

"I understand if…" I choke

She shakes her head, "No, Squall. I won't do that. Look, this is a lot to think about. But you told me. I can't believe you did. I had no idea. You poor thing. But I still love you, okay?"

I wipe the tears away quickly, "It's too dangerous."

"No."

"Rinoa, you could be killed in the crossfire. Do you have any idea?"

She takes her hand off of my cheek, "Look at me now, Squall. I have sorceress powers. There are a heck of a lot of people who want me dead. If you aren't there, who will protect me, honestly? People don't like me, Squall. They don't like me because I'm different. But you're different too. I understand how scary it is. Squall, you promised to be my knight, don't leave me now. Please."

I look at her. She's never said anything like that before. She usually won't even bring up the powers.

I can't leave her, not now. Not after what we've been through. She's a part of me, I don't think I can live without her.

"I'll keep you safe from the mobs, but I can't guarantee safety from Manticore."

She smiles, "I know. And that's okay. I just can't lose you. I don't think I'd ever love anyone again, not like this."

I just hug her. I can't help myself. I need to feel her in my arms again. It's such a good feeling.

"Don't leave me, Squall. I love you." She says

I look at her, "I won't. I love you, too."

I don't know whether I'm being retarded or logical.