CHAPTER 5: JIM
She watched as he led his campaign against the Confederates and the Zerg alike. She his and saw the first time he discovered an infested Command Center. He and his men torched it. He got arrested.
"Are you out of your mind? If we hadn't burned that damn factory this entire colony could have been overrun! Maybe if you hadn't taken your sweet time getting here…"
So she sprung him again. And he was finally curious about her. So she told him of the Sons of Korhal. And he was intrigued. But she didn't press the issue. Consequently, when one of the militia bases he was at was trapped and being overrun, he called to them. And they saved him and his men. And he joined them. It had only taken a month.
She was a bit suspicious of him at first. He was an officer! But he could take orders and wasn't too cocky! But he laughed at her suspicions, and called her "Darlin'" in his odd accent. So she promptly forgot him and went on with her work.
Only, she couldn't quite forget him. She rejoiced a little inwardly when the two of them were sent to rescue Backwater Station on Antiga Prime. There was a few Confederate bunkers there, parked right up next to and shooting at the Station.
Raynor's men met her halfway. Cloaked, she had flown over and noted the way to the station in a Wraith. They came over and she began her repot, subconsciously reading Raynor's mind. "Captain Raynor, I've already scouted out the area and… You pig!"
"WHAT? I haven't even said anything to you yet!!!"
"Yah, but you were thinkin' it."
"Oh yeah, you're a telepath. Look, lets just get this over with already."
No "Darlin'" this time. Sarah felt strangely disappointed. But she soon forgot that as they approached the station. "They got it bugged to the gills! I so much as LOOK at it wrong and we'll ALL get fried! Raynor, take your bike up back out of range and use your range shot before the Missile Turrets pint me out to any passing Marines."
But there were no Marines in the area. They proceeded with caution, but there were no more traps. The few bunkers were easily overtaken by their squadron. Seeing Kerrigan cloak and head out, Raynor slipped in to the command center in time to watch her kill. Men's heads suddenly exploded, panicking their buddies, who ran straight into an invisible knife. She was weary. Jim could see that. She kept losing her cloak, then began letting it drop when she believed no-one was watching. He caught the look on her face when she killed. Weary, yes, but there was something else. Satisfaction at a job well done, that's all, he thought. But deep down, he knew it was something else. Joy, Rapture at the thought of murder.
She was done. She slowly decloaked, her back to Jim, and looked about, all trace of the graceful but deadly butterfly inside gone. She sank to her knees and looked as if she would cry, but no. Crying was too soft an emotion for a Ghost. Instead she vomited violently.
Jim came over to try and console her. He started to put his hand gently on her shoulder, stopped, then went to stroke her cheek. He had a knife at his throat before be got halfway.
"Don't. Touch. Me. Ever." With that she got up and strode calmly away.
The mission was a success. Backwater Station was theirs. And Jim was in love.
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Sarah began to spend some of her off hours with Jim instead of Arcturus. Not many, certainly not enough, but some. They talked. It was wary talk, full of unfinished sentences and off-limits subjects: her past, some of his past, their future, "their" anything, Mensk, battle, her reaction to battle, dead people, parents, children, siblings, childhood, friendship, love… the list went on and one. She wasn't used to such talk. With Mensk she played chess. He loved chess. She owed him her soul. It wasn't the same as loving each other, but… playing chess seemed a small price for her freedom, her essence, her… soul.
But Jim she owed nothing. Or not nothing, he HAD saved her life a few times, but… she simply did not value life highly. She never had. She was incapable of understanding the idea that life was sacred.
She was Mensk's best worker, his most trusted agent. He sent her on many a crucial mission. So she was slightly hurt when he sent Jim to raid the Jacobs Installation. But he had a surprise for her: she got to sit with him in the monitoring room. She instantly decided it was better so. She trusted his judgment.
She was shocked to learn the Confederates had Zerg in their holding pens. She was even more shocked to learn that Mensk knew of this. He quickly explained that the Confederates may have even brought the Zerg to Antiga Prime, Mar Sara, and Chau Sara. After he sent Jim on his way again, he turned to her and apologized profusely for not remembering to tell her. He promised she would get the chance to avenge her planet.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean the Protoss blew up Chau Sara because the Zerg were there. I mean that the Zerg were there because the Confeds PUT them there! I mean the destruction of your homeworld was Confederate ordered!! I mean that an entire planet of people perished from the results of a Confederate WEAPON'S TEST!!!!"
She was stunned. The planet of her birth had no special meaning for her, but she knew instinctively that this was wrong.
"Listen, Sarah, I'm sorry. I think…"
"Leave. Me. Alone."
With that she strode out, shocked. She needed comfort. Mensk was not a man to her. She would never admit it, but he was like a god to her. She could hardly remember why. It was buried beneath suppressed memories.
So she went to Jim. They sobbed together. He felt her pain. He made her feel like a woman, not a soldier.
He could sense her pain. But he could also sense the void in her emotions, the abyss large and looming and eager to consume both her and him. He knew he could do nothing to that pain. It made him feel uneasy.
So he began to talk, as if his words could fill her and restore her and heal her. He spoke of a brother, now dead, on Chau Sara. He spoke of a girlfriend killed by Zerg. Of comrades found half-eaten on the creep.
She was at a loss for words. This was a new side of Jim she'd never seen before. He was grieving too, but it was a healing kind of sadness, one that filled him but did not touch his core. It's too late for me, but perhaps Jim… So she probed his thoughts. It was a reflex, but she could turn it off, shut herself in and wallow in sadness. But she no longer wanted to be alone.
So she opened up, to read and be read, if anyone around was so able.
A young boy, sadness, long ago, gone away to school, A Letter! From Bobby's school! "We regret to inform you… accident… your son/brother/husband is no longer with us…" the truth… Ghost training…
Sarah gasped, and knew no more.
She came to a minute of so later. Jim was the first thing she saw when she awoke. She could sense his genuine concern for her.
"Are you alright, Darlin'? Speak to me! SOMEONE GET A MEDIC!!!"
But of course there was no-one abut to hear.
"I… I'm fine, Jimmy."
He quickly turned back to her. "Oh thank god you're alive. Shh, now, don't try to talk. It's ok. Are you hurt? You're safe now."
He cradled her head in his arms, and she had the strange sensation of seeing herself suddenly fall to the floor. She could feel the panic in Jim even in this echo of his thoughts.
"I… I'm sorry."
"My god, she must be delirious. Listen, Darlin', you didn't do anything to be sorry about. We were just talking and you got a little overheated, nothing to worry about…"
He felt her forehead, then lightly caressed her skin. It felt so good she never wanted to moment to end. But it had to.
"No, no. I… I'm sorry about your… brother."
He froze, and she could practically see his mind working.
"So you know."
She half expected him to drop her and run off to seek solitude. She would have. But no, he held her to him in a sweet embrace.
"yes."
When they kissed, it was the pure bliss of two hearts intertwining. She felt joy, real joy, not drug-induced, for perhaps the first time in her life. And it scared her. So she stopped it.
"We can't, I can't… We're soldiers. Jim, I'm a soldier, not a blushing schoolgirl."
He looked like he'd been slapped.
"I… I'm sorry, Jim, but this is war."
"No, I'm sorry. I pushed you to it. It's my fault. I took advantage of your helplessness…"
"I've never been helpless a day in my life. I fainted from shock. I… I read your mind."
He grimaced.
"I should have known my brave Sarah would be alright."
That scared her even more, and then the fear scared her. She could face bullets and the Zerg, but she could not handle love.
"I'd better go… rest."
"yes, you rest, Darlin' you've had a long day."
He helped her up, and she left, and Jim's heart was breaking, but he was a soldier, so he showed nothing. And Sarah's heart was breaking, but she was a ghost, so she showed nothing.