"Your words to me just a whisper, your face is so unclear; I try to pay
attention, your words just disappear..." Staind - Epiphany
~*~*~*~
Despair
~*~*~*~
The light faded over the horizon as the sun slowly descended behind the Nibel Mountains. Rocket Town was deserted, even though it had been extended to a larger town size; everyone was moving inside on this oddly warm winter's night. The thunderclouds rolled above; a breakdown in the weather was expected, yet one woman stood outside of her house staring up into the sky. She turned after a while and walked up the winding dust path to the monument of where the rocket that had named this town had once stood. It had been officially named 'Cid's rocket'. The woman kept walking as her velvet brown long hair whipped around her in the gale and her black coat tangled itself around her legs. No one noticed her as she moved; they were all too occupied with preparing for the forthcoming storm, except for an old man who nodded his head at her as she walked past. "Good evening Raya..." She gave him a warm smile and kept moving.
The woman moved with an odd step up the path and, climbing the scaffolding with a graceful strength yet an air of weakness, she reached the top and settled down on the bare boards, which used to be the entry to the rocket. Leaning back against the boards behind her, she found herself sheltered from the heavy wind, not caring about the heavy raindrops that would soon begin to fall. She pushed a navy baseball cap off her head, revealing her middle-aged yet extremely youthful appearance. Her burgundy eyes shone as the woman's hair was swept back off her face, revealing the fresh tears that had been shed. She pulled a book out of her coat pocket and opened it to reveal a set of 3 photographs from different times in her life. She went through them one by one, salty tears falling from her beautiful eyes and splashing onto the book along with the rainwater.
A picture of nine young people, sat on a beach all posing happily for the camera. She could remember that day. Everyone was so tired after the endless battles; her best friend had roped everyone into getting a picture taken in Costa del Sol. She was such a good laugh, that girl; strangely devilish in her ways for someone so innocent and pure in spirit. There had been a few moans at the request. One of them was too silent and brooding to enjoy any of those kinds of things; he was always deep in thought, yet one person could always pull him out of hose thoughts despite being half his age; she was so cheerful and cheeky to everyone that even he had to laugh eventually at her pouting face when she didn't get her own way. Another of them, the short blonde man, couldn't be pulled away from his pint and his cigarettes that easily... it took the threatening presence of a tall muscular man with a weapon as part of his body to make him join in with the photo. Of course, the others had no disapproval to this photo... The gentle and thoughtful feline was always ready to join in any plans, unlike the tall toy mog and cat, which was just generally cheerful when there was no reason to be. And Raya herself... she was in this photograph, at the front with a huge smile on her face, sat next to a man whose hair seemed to be the focus point of the photograph. He had a gentle smile on his face, a smile that hinted as though there was dangerous thoughts behind those blue eyes; eyes which hid conflict within. It was already easy to see he was confused within. But that wasn't apparent to the group at that time; they were all together, they were fighting together. Everything was well; those were happier times, before death and despair would tear at the bonds they held together.
The next picture held only two faces. It was a picture of a loving father, cradling his baby in his strong arms and gazing down at her face with only love showing on his handsome face. His hair flopped over his eyes in separate sections, as it hadn't been styled; this was a picture taken on a spur of the moment, the man had on only a pair of faded shorts and the baby had just been washed. The baby was laughing along with her father, their identical blue eyes locked as they did so. The photo held an air of complete happiness. Raya closed her eyes as the sobs took over her body. She missed them both so much...
A voice floated up towards the woman from the ground below.
"Raya. It's going to rain. Come back in before you get soaked! You're not a damn teenager anymore, Raya!... What are you doing up there anyway? Damn weirdo..." It was a man of about her age; her landlord, who seemed to think he could rule over her.
Raya had a feisty spirit inside of her, but she was too caught up in the past to go challenge him now. Instead she acknowledged him with a V sign, muttering all kinds of things to herself. ("Who is he to think he can rule over me?... No one owns me. Just because people think I can't cope, he tries to control me... Besides, I'm sick of everyone calling me Raya. I'm Tifa. I can take care of myself; let them track Tifa down. What does it matter now? Fuck Sephiroth...")
The third photograph showed Tifa herself, with two children in her arms. They were a boy and a girl. They were so different looks wise - the smaller boy had red cropped hair and his mother's eyes. He was tanned and had a look about him of Tifa; it was obvious that he was her son. Her daughter, however, was older than her son and might have had the same eyes as her brother and mother, deep burgundy, wide and warm looking; however she had her mother's paler skin and she had extremely curly blonde hair down to her waist. This photograph was the hardest of all for Tifa to bear. The wound was new. She threw herself on the wet boards and cried her heart out.
------ (Tifa's POV from now on till the next divider)
This cant be happening to me... I am such a damn failure. They're right when they say that I can't cope with two children on my own. I could have though... They were angels, and Deen was just gonna get his job in the chocobo stables this summer, so he could go on holiday skiing at Icicle Inn... Arca was so feisty, she took after me, and she was gonna join the Wutain Academy which would have taught her to fight. She was already good with the knives she had which she hooked over her thumbs and performed a ritualistic attack with... She was very interested in ancient techniques. Aeris could have done with those kinds of attacks herself. My daughter is nearly an Ancient in battle techniques anyway. She could have looked after me and Deen both, because she was the strongest I know she could have done it.
But they came... They found us.
I was so careful... Raya Moona, her son Deen Moona and daughter Arca Jade Moona. Who would have thought that they weren't what they appear to be?
They wouldn't have told anyone, they knew it was a secret. Maybe they saw Arca's strength. It was definitely not ordinary. But that's not much to go on... It's my fault. They're only children. They're fifteen and ten for Ancients' sake!
And now they're in the hands of Extreme's Scientific Research Bureau. Hojo is dead, but his successor must be even worse... My poor babies.
I can't go rescue them, not with this injury.
Spirits snatched them from the field. I didn't know until I saw them being flown off in the helicopter... Arca was practising her fight stance; Deen was practising his chocobo summoning. Maybe they could both have a chance of escape with Arca's weapons and Deen's ChocoMog materia...I pray for them. I need to do something... But I'm helpless... How could they take two young children? This is heartbreaking. I'm not strong enough to stand this after all I have been through...
Oh Cloud, why did fate take you away? I need you so much. There is so much I need to discuss with you, to hear your soft voice tell me that it's alright, I need you here every step of the way. I tried without you and I failed. I failed all along the line.
I failed you. You died because you protected me... I shouldn't have let you take my blows. I should have died and you would have done so much better without me that I have without you...
I failed Midnight. I gave my first child to foster homes and now she's ran away, I've been told... I hope it's to help the resistance but I heard that Reno was imprisoned and probably killed. How can she find her way if he cannot guide her? She doesn't even know I exist... She doesn't know the danger she's in.
Oh Reno... my second love, after Cloud. I failed Reno too. I can't believe he is as good as dead because of me. I should have been more careful. I let the man I grew to love, go on a mission he was caught on just because I wanted him to go. I have lost both my loves.
I could never love Reno as much as Cloud... Cloud was a part of me, and that's why I have felt incomplete since he died. I see Cloud everywhere, I dream of him and he is the love of my life, but I care about Reno deeply as well. I have room for both in my heart. But both are gone...
My second child, Arca... She was Cloud's child. I became pregnant with Arca the week we were flying around on the ship before that day when the Highwind went down. Cloud would have been so proud... She is fifteen, and has inherited his strength. I saw on the news that Midnight has inherited it too. At least they both have that... But Deen, my little boy... He is Reno's son, and he is so small... he has only just turned ten. He cannot protect himself. My fear is that they will believe he is Cloud's son and test for Jenova and all the vile things they did to Cloud when they had their hands on him. Cloud was strong. Arca is also strong. They have the same spirit - the spirit that could pull them through the ordeal. But Deen, I'm not so sure about.
I am such a failure - I have lost all my family. Cloud, Reno, Midnight, Arca, Deen... I have let them all down. I can't let it happen anymore, I have to do something... If only I hadn't broken my legs in that car crash. They don't support my weight too well now, meaning I cant use my karate kicking skills to fight for my family and my fists aren't enough...
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~*~*~*~
Despair
~*~*~*~
The light faded over the horizon as the sun slowly descended behind the Nibel Mountains. Rocket Town was deserted, even though it had been extended to a larger town size; everyone was moving inside on this oddly warm winter's night. The thunderclouds rolled above; a breakdown in the weather was expected, yet one woman stood outside of her house staring up into the sky. She turned after a while and walked up the winding dust path to the monument of where the rocket that had named this town had once stood. It had been officially named 'Cid's rocket'. The woman kept walking as her velvet brown long hair whipped around her in the gale and her black coat tangled itself around her legs. No one noticed her as she moved; they were all too occupied with preparing for the forthcoming storm, except for an old man who nodded his head at her as she walked past. "Good evening Raya..." She gave him a warm smile and kept moving.
The woman moved with an odd step up the path and, climbing the scaffolding with a graceful strength yet an air of weakness, she reached the top and settled down on the bare boards, which used to be the entry to the rocket. Leaning back against the boards behind her, she found herself sheltered from the heavy wind, not caring about the heavy raindrops that would soon begin to fall. She pushed a navy baseball cap off her head, revealing her middle-aged yet extremely youthful appearance. Her burgundy eyes shone as the woman's hair was swept back off her face, revealing the fresh tears that had been shed. She pulled a book out of her coat pocket and opened it to reveal a set of 3 photographs from different times in her life. She went through them one by one, salty tears falling from her beautiful eyes and splashing onto the book along with the rainwater.
A picture of nine young people, sat on a beach all posing happily for the camera. She could remember that day. Everyone was so tired after the endless battles; her best friend had roped everyone into getting a picture taken in Costa del Sol. She was such a good laugh, that girl; strangely devilish in her ways for someone so innocent and pure in spirit. There had been a few moans at the request. One of them was too silent and brooding to enjoy any of those kinds of things; he was always deep in thought, yet one person could always pull him out of hose thoughts despite being half his age; she was so cheerful and cheeky to everyone that even he had to laugh eventually at her pouting face when she didn't get her own way. Another of them, the short blonde man, couldn't be pulled away from his pint and his cigarettes that easily... it took the threatening presence of a tall muscular man with a weapon as part of his body to make him join in with the photo. Of course, the others had no disapproval to this photo... The gentle and thoughtful feline was always ready to join in any plans, unlike the tall toy mog and cat, which was just generally cheerful when there was no reason to be. And Raya herself... she was in this photograph, at the front with a huge smile on her face, sat next to a man whose hair seemed to be the focus point of the photograph. He had a gentle smile on his face, a smile that hinted as though there was dangerous thoughts behind those blue eyes; eyes which hid conflict within. It was already easy to see he was confused within. But that wasn't apparent to the group at that time; they were all together, they were fighting together. Everything was well; those were happier times, before death and despair would tear at the bonds they held together.
The next picture held only two faces. It was a picture of a loving father, cradling his baby in his strong arms and gazing down at her face with only love showing on his handsome face. His hair flopped over his eyes in separate sections, as it hadn't been styled; this was a picture taken on a spur of the moment, the man had on only a pair of faded shorts and the baby had just been washed. The baby was laughing along with her father, their identical blue eyes locked as they did so. The photo held an air of complete happiness. Raya closed her eyes as the sobs took over her body. She missed them both so much...
A voice floated up towards the woman from the ground below.
"Raya. It's going to rain. Come back in before you get soaked! You're not a damn teenager anymore, Raya!... What are you doing up there anyway? Damn weirdo..." It was a man of about her age; her landlord, who seemed to think he could rule over her.
Raya had a feisty spirit inside of her, but she was too caught up in the past to go challenge him now. Instead she acknowledged him with a V sign, muttering all kinds of things to herself. ("Who is he to think he can rule over me?... No one owns me. Just because people think I can't cope, he tries to control me... Besides, I'm sick of everyone calling me Raya. I'm Tifa. I can take care of myself; let them track Tifa down. What does it matter now? Fuck Sephiroth...")
The third photograph showed Tifa herself, with two children in her arms. They were a boy and a girl. They were so different looks wise - the smaller boy had red cropped hair and his mother's eyes. He was tanned and had a look about him of Tifa; it was obvious that he was her son. Her daughter, however, was older than her son and might have had the same eyes as her brother and mother, deep burgundy, wide and warm looking; however she had her mother's paler skin and she had extremely curly blonde hair down to her waist. This photograph was the hardest of all for Tifa to bear. The wound was new. She threw herself on the wet boards and cried her heart out.
------ (Tifa's POV from now on till the next divider)
This cant be happening to me... I am such a damn failure. They're right when they say that I can't cope with two children on my own. I could have though... They were angels, and Deen was just gonna get his job in the chocobo stables this summer, so he could go on holiday skiing at Icicle Inn... Arca was so feisty, she took after me, and she was gonna join the Wutain Academy which would have taught her to fight. She was already good with the knives she had which she hooked over her thumbs and performed a ritualistic attack with... She was very interested in ancient techniques. Aeris could have done with those kinds of attacks herself. My daughter is nearly an Ancient in battle techniques anyway. She could have looked after me and Deen both, because she was the strongest I know she could have done it.
But they came... They found us.
I was so careful... Raya Moona, her son Deen Moona and daughter Arca Jade Moona. Who would have thought that they weren't what they appear to be?
They wouldn't have told anyone, they knew it was a secret. Maybe they saw Arca's strength. It was definitely not ordinary. But that's not much to go on... It's my fault. They're only children. They're fifteen and ten for Ancients' sake!
And now they're in the hands of Extreme's Scientific Research Bureau. Hojo is dead, but his successor must be even worse... My poor babies.
I can't go rescue them, not with this injury.
Spirits snatched them from the field. I didn't know until I saw them being flown off in the helicopter... Arca was practising her fight stance; Deen was practising his chocobo summoning. Maybe they could both have a chance of escape with Arca's weapons and Deen's ChocoMog materia...I pray for them. I need to do something... But I'm helpless... How could they take two young children? This is heartbreaking. I'm not strong enough to stand this after all I have been through...
Oh Cloud, why did fate take you away? I need you so much. There is so much I need to discuss with you, to hear your soft voice tell me that it's alright, I need you here every step of the way. I tried without you and I failed. I failed all along the line.
I failed you. You died because you protected me... I shouldn't have let you take my blows. I should have died and you would have done so much better without me that I have without you...
I failed Midnight. I gave my first child to foster homes and now she's ran away, I've been told... I hope it's to help the resistance but I heard that Reno was imprisoned and probably killed. How can she find her way if he cannot guide her? She doesn't even know I exist... She doesn't know the danger she's in.
Oh Reno... my second love, after Cloud. I failed Reno too. I can't believe he is as good as dead because of me. I should have been more careful. I let the man I grew to love, go on a mission he was caught on just because I wanted him to go. I have lost both my loves.
I could never love Reno as much as Cloud... Cloud was a part of me, and that's why I have felt incomplete since he died. I see Cloud everywhere, I dream of him and he is the love of my life, but I care about Reno deeply as well. I have room for both in my heart. But both are gone...
My second child, Arca... She was Cloud's child. I became pregnant with Arca the week we were flying around on the ship before that day when the Highwind went down. Cloud would have been so proud... She is fifteen, and has inherited his strength. I saw on the news that Midnight has inherited it too. At least they both have that... But Deen, my little boy... He is Reno's son, and he is so small... he has only just turned ten. He cannot protect himself. My fear is that they will believe he is Cloud's son and test for Jenova and all the vile things they did to Cloud when they had their hands on him. Cloud was strong. Arca is also strong. They have the same spirit - the spirit that could pull them through the ordeal. But Deen, I'm not so sure about.
I am such a failure - I have lost all my family. Cloud, Reno, Midnight, Arca, Deen... I have let them all down. I can't let it happen anymore, I have to do something... If only I hadn't broken my legs in that car crash. They don't support my weight too well now, meaning I cant use my karate kicking skills to fight for my family and my fists aren't enough...
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