Identity Crisis
Chapter Five: Who Do You Love?
By Minako-chan
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Disclaimer: Don't own Sailor Moon. Sigh.
A.N.: Thanks a bunch to Usagi-chan and Bunny for their endless
encouragement, as well as Sci-Fi Girl aka Arty^_~ As well as
Lelu! and everyone else who's e-mailed me to get more parts
done. So here it is, chapter 5, Who Do You Love? E-mail me at
cupid_teacup@hotmail.com
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Usagi stirred her milkshake as Motoki continued going on about
his previous date with his girlfriend, Reika.
"Usagi-chan? Earth to Usagi!" He waved his hand in front of her
when she showed no interest, only a slight pout on her lips. No
reaction, eh? Motoki thought. He grabbed a hold of her straw
that she was twirling her fingers with.
"Huh?" Usagi said, snapping out of her trance and rubbing her
red eyes.
"Usagi-chan, what's wrong? You haven't been yourself today, or
lately, for that matter." Motoki asked gently.
"Nothing." She mumbled.
The bell of the arcade jingled as the sound of footsteps grew
louder toward them.
"Hi Motoki." A deep, familiar voice greeted that made Usagi's
insides cringe. "Hi Odango-atama."
Odango atama. Back to the usual bickering, Usagi thought.
She looked away.
An immediate silence fell between them as Motoki looked from
his best friend to the small girl. Furrowing his brows,
Motoki scratched his head, trying to think of something to
ease the tension.
"Nasty youma attack last night, eh? I heard the four senshi
dusted the youma easily, but Sailor Moon almost got killed!
More than once!" He beamed, proud that he had come up with
one of the most talked-about events of the city.
Usagi winced while Mamoru looked at Motoki, grimacing.
Surrendering by holding up both hands, Motoki shrugged
and walked off to another customer. Taking the chance to
leave, Usagi fumbled through her school bag for some change
for her drink. Her cheeks flushed redder when she realized
that she had not been given any allowance yet. Mamoru
witnessed the situation and smiled at her adorable look
of concentration as she frantically dug her hands in her
skirt's pockets.
Growing a little impatient and hurt from knowing how badly
she wanted to leave him, Mamoru threw a few coins on the
table and reached out and took a hold of her wrist,
stopping her actions immediately. She looked up, her
eyes widening with confusion, sadness, and guilt, and
jerked her hand away.
"Usagi, we need to talk." Mamoru stood from his stool and
offered his hand.
Once again, Usagi looked at his hand and gulped.
"Gomen, Mamoru-san, there is nothing there to talk about."
Usagi inhaled deeply as she tried to retain her emotions;
instead, she engulfed the strong scent of his cologne -
the scent of roses. Her knees almost gave in immediately
when she thought of the other man she loved - the masked
hero.
"Well then, Usagi, I have to talk, and you just have to
listen?" He tried again, his voice gentle, as if cooing
a small child.
"Make it quick then, I'm busy." Usagi said with her
voice cracking.
"Not here, can we talk somewhere private?" He looked at
her intensely. She groaned in response, a little louder
than she had intended it to be. Several heads turned
curiously in their direction, as Motoki turned and looked
at Mamoru accusingly.
"Not again." Motoki muttered to himself as he served a
customer, thinking that his best friend had hurt the
poor Usagi again.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Usagi held onto her school bag tightly, clutching it
against her chest as she followed Mamoru. The back of
his head and his figure seemed so familiar. Had she
seen him elsewhere before and never noticed?
Mamoru turned around and saw her pouting at the back
of his head. Stopping abruptly to let her catch up,
she walked right into his chest with a loud "oof!"
Amused, Mamoru opened his mouth, about to make
another 'klutz' comment, but quickly decided
against it. Usagi followed him again silently,
blushing a bright pink colour.
"Mamoru-san, where are we going? Can't we just talk
here and get it over with?" She asked impatiently as
he seemed to be leading her around in circles. He
stopped then, and ironically they were at the same
bridge as the previous day.
Usagi took a deep breath as she came to the same
realization.
"Usagi." He turned around to face her, whispering
her name softly and placing his hands on her
shoulders.
Usagi swallowed and tried to avoid looking into
those hypnotic eyes.
"Usagi..." he tried again, tilting her head to face
him with his finger. Finally and reluctantly, she
looked at him and nodded. "I want to know...about
what you said yesterday. Was it true?"
"Yes, all of it." She gulped.
"So that means you care about me, too." Mamoru
stated.
"I do, but there are many levels of caring." Usagi
looked up bravely into his eyes.
"And just how much do you...'care' about me?"
"Not enough to have you keep questioning me about it."
Mamoru smirked. She had raised her voice a little,
and was glaring at him. Still, he thought she was
beautiful.
"And," he lowered his head, causing her to move back
a step, "how much do you 'care' for the other man
that you mentioned?"
"A lot more than I care about you." Usagi folded her
arms across her chest and gave him a small 'hmph',
satisfied with her answer.
"So, at least that man and I are at the same level
of 'care' then, since you never said anything
about caring for me and him in different ways."
He smiled triumphantly.
Usagi stood speechless with her lips parted. Mentally,
she slapped herself for not being careful enough
and revealing a little too much.
Carefully, Mamoru placed his hand to her cheek, as if
any sudden movement would break her. She made no move
as she continued to look at him with those large,
wide eyes.
"Usagi," he whispered. She swallowed again, her throat
getting drier. "What I want to know is..."
She waited as he took a deep breath, the suspense
killing her. "Who do you love more?"
She blinked as she imagined Tuxedo Kamen asking her
the same question. She had never betrayed anyone
before, and quite frankly, she didn't know how to
answer this question without betraying Mamoru,
Tuxedo Kamen, or herself. Mamoru received no answer.
Her tears fell.
Somehow, he knew he would not get an answer. It was
not that Usagi would refuse to tell him, he knew she
did not even know the answer herself. This did not
stop him from feeling disappointed, however. He had
wanted her to say his name, Chiba Mamoru, and not the
name of his alter ego.
He looked up at the sky with determined eyes as she
left dejectedly.
"You will love me for -me-." He whispered to her
retreating figure until she disappeared into a
crowd.
---------------------------------------------------
Stay Tuned for Chapter 6:
@--)--Dreaming of a Thousand Rose Petals--(--@
---------------------------------------------------
A.N.: Woohoo! Another part done! Did you like it,
hate it, neither? Send all comments to me at:
cupid_teacup@hotmail.com
Again, all thanks go to my faithful friends and
readers, especially Usagi-chan, Bunny, Arty,
and Lelu!^_^
Chapter Five: Who Do You Love?
By Minako-chan
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Disclaimer: Don't own Sailor Moon. Sigh.
A.N.: Thanks a bunch to Usagi-chan and Bunny for their endless
encouragement, as well as Sci-Fi Girl aka Arty^_~ As well as
Lelu! and everyone else who's e-mailed me to get more parts
done. So here it is, chapter 5, Who Do You Love? E-mail me at
cupid_teacup@hotmail.com
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Usagi stirred her milkshake as Motoki continued going on about
his previous date with his girlfriend, Reika.
"Usagi-chan? Earth to Usagi!" He waved his hand in front of her
when she showed no interest, only a slight pout on her lips. No
reaction, eh? Motoki thought. He grabbed a hold of her straw
that she was twirling her fingers with.
"Huh?" Usagi said, snapping out of her trance and rubbing her
red eyes.
"Usagi-chan, what's wrong? You haven't been yourself today, or
lately, for that matter." Motoki asked gently.
"Nothing." She mumbled.
The bell of the arcade jingled as the sound of footsteps grew
louder toward them.
"Hi Motoki." A deep, familiar voice greeted that made Usagi's
insides cringe. "Hi Odango-atama."
Odango atama. Back to the usual bickering, Usagi thought.
She looked away.
An immediate silence fell between them as Motoki looked from
his best friend to the small girl. Furrowing his brows,
Motoki scratched his head, trying to think of something to
ease the tension.
"Nasty youma attack last night, eh? I heard the four senshi
dusted the youma easily, but Sailor Moon almost got killed!
More than once!" He beamed, proud that he had come up with
one of the most talked-about events of the city.
Usagi winced while Mamoru looked at Motoki, grimacing.
Surrendering by holding up both hands, Motoki shrugged
and walked off to another customer. Taking the chance to
leave, Usagi fumbled through her school bag for some change
for her drink. Her cheeks flushed redder when she realized
that she had not been given any allowance yet. Mamoru
witnessed the situation and smiled at her adorable look
of concentration as she frantically dug her hands in her
skirt's pockets.
Growing a little impatient and hurt from knowing how badly
she wanted to leave him, Mamoru threw a few coins on the
table and reached out and took a hold of her wrist,
stopping her actions immediately. She looked up, her
eyes widening with confusion, sadness, and guilt, and
jerked her hand away.
"Usagi, we need to talk." Mamoru stood from his stool and
offered his hand.
Once again, Usagi looked at his hand and gulped.
"Gomen, Mamoru-san, there is nothing there to talk about."
Usagi inhaled deeply as she tried to retain her emotions;
instead, she engulfed the strong scent of his cologne -
the scent of roses. Her knees almost gave in immediately
when she thought of the other man she loved - the masked
hero.
"Well then, Usagi, I have to talk, and you just have to
listen?" He tried again, his voice gentle, as if cooing
a small child.
"Make it quick then, I'm busy." Usagi said with her
voice cracking.
"Not here, can we talk somewhere private?" He looked at
her intensely. She groaned in response, a little louder
than she had intended it to be. Several heads turned
curiously in their direction, as Motoki turned and looked
at Mamoru accusingly.
"Not again." Motoki muttered to himself as he served a
customer, thinking that his best friend had hurt the
poor Usagi again.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Usagi held onto her school bag tightly, clutching it
against her chest as she followed Mamoru. The back of
his head and his figure seemed so familiar. Had she
seen him elsewhere before and never noticed?
Mamoru turned around and saw her pouting at the back
of his head. Stopping abruptly to let her catch up,
she walked right into his chest with a loud "oof!"
Amused, Mamoru opened his mouth, about to make
another 'klutz' comment, but quickly decided
against it. Usagi followed him again silently,
blushing a bright pink colour.
"Mamoru-san, where are we going? Can't we just talk
here and get it over with?" She asked impatiently as
he seemed to be leading her around in circles. He
stopped then, and ironically they were at the same
bridge as the previous day.
Usagi took a deep breath as she came to the same
realization.
"Usagi." He turned around to face her, whispering
her name softly and placing his hands on her
shoulders.
Usagi swallowed and tried to avoid looking into
those hypnotic eyes.
"Usagi..." he tried again, tilting her head to face
him with his finger. Finally and reluctantly, she
looked at him and nodded. "I want to know...about
what you said yesterday. Was it true?"
"Yes, all of it." She gulped.
"So that means you care about me, too." Mamoru
stated.
"I do, but there are many levels of caring." Usagi
looked up bravely into his eyes.
"And just how much do you...'care' about me?"
"Not enough to have you keep questioning me about it."
Mamoru smirked. She had raised her voice a little,
and was glaring at him. Still, he thought she was
beautiful.
"And," he lowered his head, causing her to move back
a step, "how much do you 'care' for the other man
that you mentioned?"
"A lot more than I care about you." Usagi folded her
arms across her chest and gave him a small 'hmph',
satisfied with her answer.
"So, at least that man and I are at the same level
of 'care' then, since you never said anything
about caring for me and him in different ways."
He smiled triumphantly.
Usagi stood speechless with her lips parted. Mentally,
she slapped herself for not being careful enough
and revealing a little too much.
Carefully, Mamoru placed his hand to her cheek, as if
any sudden movement would break her. She made no move
as she continued to look at him with those large,
wide eyes.
"Usagi," he whispered. She swallowed again, her throat
getting drier. "What I want to know is..."
She waited as he took a deep breath, the suspense
killing her. "Who do you love more?"
She blinked as she imagined Tuxedo Kamen asking her
the same question. She had never betrayed anyone
before, and quite frankly, she didn't know how to
answer this question without betraying Mamoru,
Tuxedo Kamen, or herself. Mamoru received no answer.
Her tears fell.
Somehow, he knew he would not get an answer. It was
not that Usagi would refuse to tell him, he knew she
did not even know the answer herself. This did not
stop him from feeling disappointed, however. He had
wanted her to say his name, Chiba Mamoru, and not the
name of his alter ego.
He looked up at the sky with determined eyes as she
left dejectedly.
"You will love me for -me-." He whispered to her
retreating figure until she disappeared into a
crowd.
---------------------------------------------------
Stay Tuned for Chapter 6:
@--)--Dreaming of a Thousand Rose Petals--(--@
---------------------------------------------------
A.N.: Woohoo! Another part done! Did you like it,
hate it, neither? Send all comments to me at:
cupid_teacup@hotmail.com
Again, all thanks go to my faithful friends and
readers, especially Usagi-chan, Bunny, Arty,
and Lelu!^_^