Disclaimer: Same as always.
Notes: I know this has taken a little while, but it's worth it, at least in my opinion. But, I do have to admit, I'm biased. And, as always, enjoy!
Excruciating pain, like nothing he had ever felt before. They had stuck him in something that inflicted pain every time he tried to stuggle or even move in the slightest. They had taken some sort of blade, and sliced his face. He had thought that they were going to slice his face right off his head.
Eventually, he had passed out, from blood loss and pain. The escape of unconsciousness brought him blissful nothingness for a short time. Soon, though, they figured out how to torture him even in his dreams.
They would show him images of him fighting his sister in a death duel. Sometimes, he would win and would then be killed in a glorious sacrifice. Sometimes, his sister would win, with the same end results. Always, they would both end up dead.
A few times, they would show him images of his friends. He was sure that they were somehow stealing the information from his brain, but he could do nothing to stop them. Pictures of a grieving Tahiri, Tenel Ka as queen, and Lowie tinkering with some machine all pervaded his dreams. But always, in those visions, the Vong would come and restrain his friends as he himself killed them in cold-blood.
Every few hours, he would awaken, screaming. He knew that he had been broken. They had broken him with his brother's death. Now, they were trying to shape him into their image. They wanted him to be just like them. They hated everything that was even remotely different from them.
For months, they had tortured him, trying to implant false memories in his head. They had partially succeeded, when an unlikely being had come to his rescue.
The "rescue" and becoming Jacen Solo again had been almost more painful than becoming an Yuuzhan Vong. Vergere had to use the Force and pierce through layers of Vong memories. She had to forcefully pull his other memories to the surface. After every session, he was left barely alive, his throat raw from screaming
After what seemed like an eternity, his family had come to rescue him. There had been a great battle aboard the worldship, with many Vong left dead afterwards. Vergere had tried to escape and come with them, but had been struck by an amphistaff as she ran. She had fallen dead fifteen meters from their escape ship.
The image of the feathered Jedi falling dead, her lifeless eyes staring at nothing and everything at the same time, haunted Jacen: in his dreams, in meditation, at odd moments.
Now, that image came, along with remembered pain. Somehow, it felt worse than it had the first time. He began to scream....
Tahiri glanced at her wrist chrono as she left a meditation chamber: 18:11, time for evening meal. The young Jedi headed for the messhalls, her bare feet almost silent on the cold durasteel plating. She keyed open the turbolift and was about to enter when she heard a piercing scream. Forgetting the lift, Tahiri sprinted towards the source of the scream.
She entered a meditation room at a dead run, but stopped short just inside the door. Jacen Solo was sprawled out on the floor, crying, but still screaming. He seemed to be in some sort of trance. After a second, Tahiri's mind reasserted control over her body and she stepped over to Jacen.
Crouching quickly, she gently reached out to Jacen with her hands and mind. His body was shaking, but his mind was in absolute turmoil. Something was causing him pain. Tahiri caught brief glimpses of Jacen's rescue from the Vong before his barriers were subconsciously slammed down again.
"Jacen," she called out vocally and mentally. "It's Tahiri. You're safe, Jacen. You're with friends now. The Vong can't hurt you anymore. Come on, Jacen. Wake up." Tahiri called out to him some more, trying to get him to wake.
Jacen's screaming subsided into quiet sobs. A few minutes later, he awoke. He stared up at Tahiri, his chocolate-colored gaze strong and penetrating. Tahiri looked back at him, her own emerald gaze non-wavering.
Jacen sat up, but never took his eyes off of Tahiri. He sat cross-legged, facing the other Jedi, and gestured for her to do the same. Once she had complied, and they were sitting knee-to-knee, Jacen spoke. "Thank you." His voice was hoarse from screaming and sobbing, but other than that, was strong.
Tahiri nodded. "You had a vision about your time with the Vong." It was a statement, not a question, for Tahiri already knew the answer. She knew that Jacen needed to speak about his time with the aliens, but he would never bring it up himself, so she had provided him with that opportunity.
He nodded, and for the first time since waking, shifted his gaze from Tahiri and looked at his hands. Tahiri, not knowing what else to do, reached out and took his large hands in her own small ones. Jacen looked up, startled at her action.
"Jacen, I've been where you've been," she said softly. "I've gotten over my time as an Yuuzhan Vong captive. I don't need to talk about it. But you do. That's the only way you'll get over it and heal."
Jacen nodded, then looked back down at their clasped hands. "They broke me," he told her after a moment. "I was weak, and I was broken. They scarred me like I was one of them. They tried to turn me into one of them."
He paused and took a deep breath before continuing. "They showed me visions of Jaina and I in a death duel. Sometimes, I won, sometimes, I lost. But always, always, we both ended up dead. They showed me visions of me killing you, killing Tenel Ka, killing all of my friends. I even started to believe that I was one of them and that all of my 'infidel friends' needed to die."
He paused again, still looking at his and Tahiri's hands. Tahiri squeezed his hands encouragingly. He looked up at her a smiled a small, grateful smile. The smile faded, though, as his eyes became unfocused and his memory took a hold of him once again.
"Vergere saved me from the shaping. She broke through the barriers the shapers had put up and brought my real memories to the surface. That hurt more than my breaking and shaping, but it was worth it. I owed her my life.
"What haunts me is her death," he continued quietly. His eyes focused on some point on the wall over Tahiri's shoulder. "We were almost free, and she was struck down. She died, and I couldn't prevent it. We didn't even take her body for proper burial rites. She saved me, and I couldn't even do the simplest task for her." Tears were again coursing down his cheeks, but this time silently. He didn't even attempt to wipe them away. He was too lost in a world of memories.
Tahiri got to her knees in front of Jacen. She pulled her hands from his, but he didn't seem to notice. She pulled him to her in a tight hug, stroking the back of his head. He clung tightly to her, letting his tears be absorbed by the material of her shirt.
"It'll be okay," she whispered to him. "You'll hurt for a long tim, but it'll fade after a while. The hurt and guilt and pain will always be there, but they won't always be so strong. You just can't let them consume you."
Jacen sniffled, then turned his head so his left temple rested against Tahiri's right shoulder. "How did you get over Anakin?" he asked, his breath a whisper on her neck.
Tahiri rested her head on Jacen's shoulder as the all-to-familar pain began to take hold of her. "I'm not over Anakin," she replied. "And I never will be. I'll always love your brother. And even though he's gone, he'll always hold a place in my heart." She paused and sighed before continuing. "I'm still trying to cope with the pain. Your family is helping, but they'll never understand. We were just beginning to discover out feeling for each other when he died. I'll always wonder what might have been, but I'll never know."
Jacen squeezed her tight before pulling away. He got his own knees beneath him, mirroring Tahiri's position. "I promised Anakin before he died that I would finish the mission for him," he told her. "But he gave me an order that I haven't been able to follow through on."
"And what as that?" Tahiri asked, puzzled. He wouldn't be telling me this unless it involved me. But what could that be?
The answer came to her as Jacen leaned forward and kissed her lightly, his lips lingering on hers for a second before he pulled back once more.
I told Anakin that he'd get that kiss when he came back, but he never did.
"Anakin told me to kiss you for him. He told me to get you to safety," Jacen told her. "He loved you, Tahiri."
"I know," she replied. Jacen laughed, and Tahiri glared at him. "What is it that you find so funny about all of this?"
"I'm sorry," he apologized, smiling slightly. "But whenever someone in my family declares their feeling for someone, the other person always says 'I know.' It started with my parents, on Cloud City. I guess it's a family tradition."
Tahiri let a smile tug at the corners of her mouth, but didn't let it bloom into a full smile. She stood, held out her hands to Jacen, waited for him to grasp them, then pulled him to his feet in front of her. She dropped his hands and gestured to the door. "Now, we're going to get some evening meal," she told him, heading for the door. "That's where I was going when I heard you scream."
"If the lady says so..." Jacen trailed off, following Tahiri out the door and down the corridor.
"I say so," she said firmly. "Now, come on, or there might not be any food left."
"I'm coming, I'm coming," Jacen said, the door closing behind him. The meditation room was engulfed in darkness, the only witness to the events that had taken place in there, the walls. And a small Yuuzhan Vong recording device, waiting for the Traitor to retrieve it.
Notes: So, how'd you like it? Leave me a comment or two, as always. Oh, yeah, and I already have the next chapter written. If I get some good reviews, I'll get it up soon. Thanks!!
Notes: I know this has taken a little while, but it's worth it, at least in my opinion. But, I do have to admit, I'm biased. And, as always, enjoy!
Excruciating pain, like nothing he had ever felt before. They had stuck him in something that inflicted pain every time he tried to stuggle or even move in the slightest. They had taken some sort of blade, and sliced his face. He had thought that they were going to slice his face right off his head.
Eventually, he had passed out, from blood loss and pain. The escape of unconsciousness brought him blissful nothingness for a short time. Soon, though, they figured out how to torture him even in his dreams.
They would show him images of him fighting his sister in a death duel. Sometimes, he would win and would then be killed in a glorious sacrifice. Sometimes, his sister would win, with the same end results. Always, they would both end up dead.
A few times, they would show him images of his friends. He was sure that they were somehow stealing the information from his brain, but he could do nothing to stop them. Pictures of a grieving Tahiri, Tenel Ka as queen, and Lowie tinkering with some machine all pervaded his dreams. But always, in those visions, the Vong would come and restrain his friends as he himself killed them in cold-blood.
Every few hours, he would awaken, screaming. He knew that he had been broken. They had broken him with his brother's death. Now, they were trying to shape him into their image. They wanted him to be just like them. They hated everything that was even remotely different from them.
For months, they had tortured him, trying to implant false memories in his head. They had partially succeeded, when an unlikely being had come to his rescue.
The "rescue" and becoming Jacen Solo again had been almost more painful than becoming an Yuuzhan Vong. Vergere had to use the Force and pierce through layers of Vong memories. She had to forcefully pull his other memories to the surface. After every session, he was left barely alive, his throat raw from screaming
After what seemed like an eternity, his family had come to rescue him. There had been a great battle aboard the worldship, with many Vong left dead afterwards. Vergere had tried to escape and come with them, but had been struck by an amphistaff as she ran. She had fallen dead fifteen meters from their escape ship.
The image of the feathered Jedi falling dead, her lifeless eyes staring at nothing and everything at the same time, haunted Jacen: in his dreams, in meditation, at odd moments.
Now, that image came, along with remembered pain. Somehow, it felt worse than it had the first time. He began to scream....
Tahiri glanced at her wrist chrono as she left a meditation chamber: 18:11, time for evening meal. The young Jedi headed for the messhalls, her bare feet almost silent on the cold durasteel plating. She keyed open the turbolift and was about to enter when she heard a piercing scream. Forgetting the lift, Tahiri sprinted towards the source of the scream.
She entered a meditation room at a dead run, but stopped short just inside the door. Jacen Solo was sprawled out on the floor, crying, but still screaming. He seemed to be in some sort of trance. After a second, Tahiri's mind reasserted control over her body and she stepped over to Jacen.
Crouching quickly, she gently reached out to Jacen with her hands and mind. His body was shaking, but his mind was in absolute turmoil. Something was causing him pain. Tahiri caught brief glimpses of Jacen's rescue from the Vong before his barriers were subconsciously slammed down again.
"Jacen," she called out vocally and mentally. "It's Tahiri. You're safe, Jacen. You're with friends now. The Vong can't hurt you anymore. Come on, Jacen. Wake up." Tahiri called out to him some more, trying to get him to wake.
Jacen's screaming subsided into quiet sobs. A few minutes later, he awoke. He stared up at Tahiri, his chocolate-colored gaze strong and penetrating. Tahiri looked back at him, her own emerald gaze non-wavering.
Jacen sat up, but never took his eyes off of Tahiri. He sat cross-legged, facing the other Jedi, and gestured for her to do the same. Once she had complied, and they were sitting knee-to-knee, Jacen spoke. "Thank you." His voice was hoarse from screaming and sobbing, but other than that, was strong.
Tahiri nodded. "You had a vision about your time with the Vong." It was a statement, not a question, for Tahiri already knew the answer. She knew that Jacen needed to speak about his time with the aliens, but he would never bring it up himself, so she had provided him with that opportunity.
He nodded, and for the first time since waking, shifted his gaze from Tahiri and looked at his hands. Tahiri, not knowing what else to do, reached out and took his large hands in her own small ones. Jacen looked up, startled at her action.
"Jacen, I've been where you've been," she said softly. "I've gotten over my time as an Yuuzhan Vong captive. I don't need to talk about it. But you do. That's the only way you'll get over it and heal."
Jacen nodded, then looked back down at their clasped hands. "They broke me," he told her after a moment. "I was weak, and I was broken. They scarred me like I was one of them. They tried to turn me into one of them."
He paused and took a deep breath before continuing. "They showed me visions of Jaina and I in a death duel. Sometimes, I won, sometimes, I lost. But always, always, we both ended up dead. They showed me visions of me killing you, killing Tenel Ka, killing all of my friends. I even started to believe that I was one of them and that all of my 'infidel friends' needed to die."
He paused again, still looking at his and Tahiri's hands. Tahiri squeezed his hands encouragingly. He looked up at her a smiled a small, grateful smile. The smile faded, though, as his eyes became unfocused and his memory took a hold of him once again.
"Vergere saved me from the shaping. She broke through the barriers the shapers had put up and brought my real memories to the surface. That hurt more than my breaking and shaping, but it was worth it. I owed her my life.
"What haunts me is her death," he continued quietly. His eyes focused on some point on the wall over Tahiri's shoulder. "We were almost free, and she was struck down. She died, and I couldn't prevent it. We didn't even take her body for proper burial rites. She saved me, and I couldn't even do the simplest task for her." Tears were again coursing down his cheeks, but this time silently. He didn't even attempt to wipe them away. He was too lost in a world of memories.
Tahiri got to her knees in front of Jacen. She pulled her hands from his, but he didn't seem to notice. She pulled him to her in a tight hug, stroking the back of his head. He clung tightly to her, letting his tears be absorbed by the material of her shirt.
"It'll be okay," she whispered to him. "You'll hurt for a long tim, but it'll fade after a while. The hurt and guilt and pain will always be there, but they won't always be so strong. You just can't let them consume you."
Jacen sniffled, then turned his head so his left temple rested against Tahiri's right shoulder. "How did you get over Anakin?" he asked, his breath a whisper on her neck.
Tahiri rested her head on Jacen's shoulder as the all-to-familar pain began to take hold of her. "I'm not over Anakin," she replied. "And I never will be. I'll always love your brother. And even though he's gone, he'll always hold a place in my heart." She paused and sighed before continuing. "I'm still trying to cope with the pain. Your family is helping, but they'll never understand. We were just beginning to discover out feeling for each other when he died. I'll always wonder what might have been, but I'll never know."
Jacen squeezed her tight before pulling away. He got his own knees beneath him, mirroring Tahiri's position. "I promised Anakin before he died that I would finish the mission for him," he told her. "But he gave me an order that I haven't been able to follow through on."
"And what as that?" Tahiri asked, puzzled. He wouldn't be telling me this unless it involved me. But what could that be?
The answer came to her as Jacen leaned forward and kissed her lightly, his lips lingering on hers for a second before he pulled back once more.
I told Anakin that he'd get that kiss when he came back, but he never did.
"Anakin told me to kiss you for him. He told me to get you to safety," Jacen told her. "He loved you, Tahiri."
"I know," she replied. Jacen laughed, and Tahiri glared at him. "What is it that you find so funny about all of this?"
"I'm sorry," he apologized, smiling slightly. "But whenever someone in my family declares their feeling for someone, the other person always says 'I know.' It started with my parents, on Cloud City. I guess it's a family tradition."
Tahiri let a smile tug at the corners of her mouth, but didn't let it bloom into a full smile. She stood, held out her hands to Jacen, waited for him to grasp them, then pulled him to his feet in front of her. She dropped his hands and gestured to the door. "Now, we're going to get some evening meal," she told him, heading for the door. "That's where I was going when I heard you scream."
"If the lady says so..." Jacen trailed off, following Tahiri out the door and down the corridor.
"I say so," she said firmly. "Now, come on, or there might not be any food left."
"I'm coming, I'm coming," Jacen said, the door closing behind him. The meditation room was engulfed in darkness, the only witness to the events that had taken place in there, the walls. And a small Yuuzhan Vong recording device, waiting for the Traitor to retrieve it.
Notes: So, how'd you like it? Leave me a comment or two, as always. Oh, yeah, and I already have the next chapter written. If I get some good reviews, I'll get it up soon. Thanks!!