AUTHOR'S NOTE :
Elrinna : Sowwy about that. *Rufferto (Groo The Wanderer's dog (www.groo.com) wags its tail hopefully* I confuse myself sometimes. Its not easy when you're trying to get the viewpoints of several different characters involved. I forgot to mention that chapter was in Aragorn's POV. Silly Me! Will try and remember to put the POV's at the top. Thank you for bringing it up! *begs for a Scooby Snack!* Arrooo? *looks very cute*
Merilas Lovers : She'll be in the next chapter after this one! Will Leggy find her?….Okay…I said there'd only be six chapters but since you all wanted more, I decided to throw in a few more for you…and a bit of Frodo cuddling. Poor Hobbit. He needs it.
Frodo's POV (This Chapter For Lily Baggins!)
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Chapter 25 : Remembering The Pain
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I curled up against Arwen, my eyes were closed. I knew…mostly where I was. It was just that I could see things I did not want to see. Ever since the Ring was destroyed I'd been having terrible nightmares. I wanted…well…there was a lot that I wanted that I could not have right now. Mostly…I just felt like I had failed..even though it was destroyed I hadn't been the one to do it. All I did was take it there.. I kept myself together through the parties…and the wedding…and now…now I just couldn't keep everything inside anymore. We were going to be going home soon…and…and I … nothing would ever be the same in the Shire again for me. We had all changed, I knew…
My throat had been bothering me for the last week or so, but I hadn't wanted to tell anyone about it. I was tired of…always needed someone to take care of me. Would it never end? Would I never be able to walk on my own two feet? There were things I wanted to do. There was…there was…well…I knew I had to pass through Rivendell.
"Arwen…" I shivered. "Its cold…Why is it so dark in here?" I clung to her. She was warm…and had always cared about me, I think. She always seemed to understand. She let me rest my head against her as I tried to shut out the images. A whip coming down…I cringed…It felt as though my ribs were cracking…I remembered the hands pulling against the ropes that bound me. I saw him…I shuddered. Every muscle in my body ached…and yet…he continued to ask me the same questions over and over again…"Its dark…" I began to cry…I could not stop the tears. Hands were reaching out to me and I cringed away from them.
"Frodo, Its alright…Your safe now." I heard what must be Aragorn's voice…his large hands on my shoulders, soothing.
"The tea is not working, Aragorn…He's got a fever…and he is not remembering where he is." I heard Arwen tell him gently…then they began speaking quickly in Elvish and I was in too much pain to try and understand. All I could feel was the twisting rope as it pulled against my skin…and the other things…that they did to me. I shivered.
"I'm cold…" I whimpered…my voice was hoarse and unnatural to me. "Please…"
I felt Arwen remove my shirt and lay me against the pillows. They were bathing my chest and neck. I supposed I must have been sweating. They tried to get me to drink some juice…but I didn't want anything in my throat…it hurt too much and I refused. I was seeing four faces…four dark shadows…swathed in blackness…reaching their hands to me…I cried out in pain. I felt something against my lips…ice…it tasted good…no…it wasn't ice…it was cold. Frozen juice…it felt good melting in my throat. I let them give me a few more before turning away.
I couldn't feel my hand anymore…was it still there? I began to shiver again. Cold…Too dark…a sea of faces swirled in my memory. I tried to move my legs but they felt heavy and lethargic. My whole body seemed to be numb with pain and each move was an effort I did not want to make. I opened my eyes and misty darkness still swam around me. My shoulder felt like it was frozen solid. And yet they moved me...again and again…I just wanted to lay still…lie in someone's arms…and be held. "Stop…stop…" I begged.
And the moving stopped, I found myself lying between Arwen and Aragorn as they cradled me quietly. I was finally able to see again as I looked between them. Arwen drew a cool cloth and dabbed my forehead and cheeks with it gently and I saw that dawn was breaking.
"Its over, Frodo…You're safe." Aragorn assured me. He'd been holding his hand over one of mine.
"I can still see them…" I shook my head and closed my eyes painfully. "Its not over."
Arwen was holding something to my lips. "Take something to eat Frodo…this will be good on your throat. As much as you can…you haven't eaten for two days."
I barely felt my stomach as it was…but maybe…if I ate something…she would hold me again. I opened my mouth. She spooned the cream in. It was frozen…and tasted a little like raspberries. It began to melt easily in my warm mouth. I sighed softly…it did taste good. Another spoonful was offered and I gladly accepted. It was not harsh on my throat. I let her feed me…first the raspberry cream…then some warm applesauce. After that I really could not get anything more down. I turned my head away, still not opening my eyes. I did not want this to be a dream. I'd often dreamed in the tower…when I was in pain…and I would wake up…and then…tears welled in my eyes. I couldn't get it out of my head.
And she did hold me.
"He'll be better when the fever is gone." Aragorn told Arwen gently, "Just keep him comforted. He's remembering the past…and the only thing we can do is continue to reassure him. Let him know he's cared for. Let him know he's safe."
"Frodo…" Arwen's voice was very soft. "Its allright, Frodo."
It would never be alright.
Ever again.
Elrinna : Sowwy about that. *Rufferto (Groo The Wanderer's dog (www.groo.com) wags its tail hopefully* I confuse myself sometimes. Its not easy when you're trying to get the viewpoints of several different characters involved. I forgot to mention that chapter was in Aragorn's POV. Silly Me! Will try and remember to put the POV's at the top. Thank you for bringing it up! *begs for a Scooby Snack!* Arrooo? *looks very cute*
Merilas Lovers : She'll be in the next chapter after this one! Will Leggy find her?….Okay…I said there'd only be six chapters but since you all wanted more, I decided to throw in a few more for you…and a bit of Frodo cuddling. Poor Hobbit. He needs it.
Frodo's POV (This Chapter For Lily Baggins!)
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Chapter 25 : Remembering The Pain
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I curled up against Arwen, my eyes were closed. I knew…mostly where I was. It was just that I could see things I did not want to see. Ever since the Ring was destroyed I'd been having terrible nightmares. I wanted…well…there was a lot that I wanted that I could not have right now. Mostly…I just felt like I had failed..even though it was destroyed I hadn't been the one to do it. All I did was take it there.. I kept myself together through the parties…and the wedding…and now…now I just couldn't keep everything inside anymore. We were going to be going home soon…and…and I … nothing would ever be the same in the Shire again for me. We had all changed, I knew…
My throat had been bothering me for the last week or so, but I hadn't wanted to tell anyone about it. I was tired of…always needed someone to take care of me. Would it never end? Would I never be able to walk on my own two feet? There were things I wanted to do. There was…there was…well…I knew I had to pass through Rivendell.
"Arwen…" I shivered. "Its cold…Why is it so dark in here?" I clung to her. She was warm…and had always cared about me, I think. She always seemed to understand. She let me rest my head against her as I tried to shut out the images. A whip coming down…I cringed…It felt as though my ribs were cracking…I remembered the hands pulling against the ropes that bound me. I saw him…I shuddered. Every muscle in my body ached…and yet…he continued to ask me the same questions over and over again…"Its dark…" I began to cry…I could not stop the tears. Hands were reaching out to me and I cringed away from them.
"Frodo, Its alright…Your safe now." I heard what must be Aragorn's voice…his large hands on my shoulders, soothing.
"The tea is not working, Aragorn…He's got a fever…and he is not remembering where he is." I heard Arwen tell him gently…then they began speaking quickly in Elvish and I was in too much pain to try and understand. All I could feel was the twisting rope as it pulled against my skin…and the other things…that they did to me. I shivered.
"I'm cold…" I whimpered…my voice was hoarse and unnatural to me. "Please…"
I felt Arwen remove my shirt and lay me against the pillows. They were bathing my chest and neck. I supposed I must have been sweating. They tried to get me to drink some juice…but I didn't want anything in my throat…it hurt too much and I refused. I was seeing four faces…four dark shadows…swathed in blackness…reaching their hands to me…I cried out in pain. I felt something against my lips…ice…it tasted good…no…it wasn't ice…it was cold. Frozen juice…it felt good melting in my throat. I let them give me a few more before turning away.
I couldn't feel my hand anymore…was it still there? I began to shiver again. Cold…Too dark…a sea of faces swirled in my memory. I tried to move my legs but they felt heavy and lethargic. My whole body seemed to be numb with pain and each move was an effort I did not want to make. I opened my eyes and misty darkness still swam around me. My shoulder felt like it was frozen solid. And yet they moved me...again and again…I just wanted to lay still…lie in someone's arms…and be held. "Stop…stop…" I begged.
And the moving stopped, I found myself lying between Arwen and Aragorn as they cradled me quietly. I was finally able to see again as I looked between them. Arwen drew a cool cloth and dabbed my forehead and cheeks with it gently and I saw that dawn was breaking.
"Its over, Frodo…You're safe." Aragorn assured me. He'd been holding his hand over one of mine.
"I can still see them…" I shook my head and closed my eyes painfully. "Its not over."
Arwen was holding something to my lips. "Take something to eat Frodo…this will be good on your throat. As much as you can…you haven't eaten for two days."
I barely felt my stomach as it was…but maybe…if I ate something…she would hold me again. I opened my mouth. She spooned the cream in. It was frozen…and tasted a little like raspberries. It began to melt easily in my warm mouth. I sighed softly…it did taste good. Another spoonful was offered and I gladly accepted. It was not harsh on my throat. I let her feed me…first the raspberry cream…then some warm applesauce. After that I really could not get anything more down. I turned my head away, still not opening my eyes. I did not want this to be a dream. I'd often dreamed in the tower…when I was in pain…and I would wake up…and then…tears welled in my eyes. I couldn't get it out of my head.
And she did hold me.
"He'll be better when the fever is gone." Aragorn told Arwen gently, "Just keep him comforted. He's remembering the past…and the only thing we can do is continue to reassure him. Let him know he's cared for. Let him know he's safe."
"Frodo…" Arwen's voice was very soft. "Its allright, Frodo."
It would never be alright.
Ever again.