Of Phoenix Feathers and Dragon Wings
Ch2
Disclaimer: I still don't own pokemon. I do own a pair of huge green sunglasses and a horribly mutilated Bio book, though.
pinkdragonflame: Arrrrgh!!! Bio test tml!!! Help me somebody!! ANYBODY!!!!
(Lugia and Ho-oh appear)
pinkdragonflame: -_-;;; Anybody but you two…
Lugia: Oooooh… *peeks at undecipherable words & pictures* …this is cool…
pinkdragonflame: There's a difference between "cool" and "torture", you know?
Lugia: Yeah…but this is COOL!! Hey-check this out…an…air…reo…no, that's not right…an…a…robe…
pinkdragonflame: -_-;; Anaerobic…
Lugia: Hehe…oh yeah…anaerobic resignation.
Ho-oh: It's respiration. Are you sure you're wearing your contacts?
Lugia: For the fiftieth-and-final-time: YES! Why d'ya keep bugging me about it?
Ho-oh: Well…it could be due to the fact that you teleported us to Alaska. Twice. Then drove an Eevee sled into seven stop signs. And asked that fat old Seel if she was your long-lost uncle…
Lugia: Alright already…its not my fault-the salt water gets into everything…. *removes contacts and pops a new pair in* There, case closed. Sheesh, you make it sound as though I sank the SS Anne or something like that…
** Scene switches to sea. The SS Anne has a suspiciously Lugia-shaped hole in it's middle, and is sinking slowly and dramatically.
Ash: *runs in slow-mo to Misty, who is standing at the edge of the deck and about to jump over the railing* Don't do it! If we die, we die together!
Misty: *rolls eyes*You've gotta be kidding me…*throws pokeballs* Staryu! Goldeen! Poliwhirl! I choose you! I dunno about you Ash, but I'm ditching this joint! *leaps in and swims to safety*
Ash: Misty!!! T_T *drops to knees* Nooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!**
Lugia:…
pinkdragonflame: Glucose respiration water! Energy fermentation sternum smoking bronchus alveolus… Haha! Too bad for Ash that his Squirtle went on strike…
Ho-oh: Oh help! She's speaking BIO!!! The horror!!!!
pinkdragonflame: Trachea pharynx? Say what?
Ho-oh: Ahhhhhh! I can't take it!!! *flies off, screeching insanely*
~~So…where did we leave off? Oh yes…Ho-oh gets kicked out of his Tin Tower and pretty much demolishes it. Ash is snoring in a bed with Pikachu at his side, drooling as he dreams of food. And Uyu hears weird voices and laughter in his head and figures that he's insane. So…we'll just move on from there…~~
-Lugia-
"You touched his mind??! Without informing the Council or myself first? That's reckless, Suicune; you're gonna get us all into trouble."
I glared angrily at the dog-like pokemon who had just entered. Unfortunately however, he paid no heed to my comment-just plopped himself onto a rug and smiled.
"I know he's the one, Lugie…I can feel it…"
I rolled my eyes.
"What are you, some sort of psychic or something?"
"No." He stated, stretching out comfortably, "I'm a Water-Type. It says so in the Pokedex."
"You mean it would say so in the Pokedex." I reminded, "No human has ever found out yet. And that's exactly why you should be more wary. Remember: all they care about is catching us. They're manipulative, double-faced *beeps* who don't give a damn about how we feel. All they think about are themselves, and they'll do anything in their power to get what they want. There are no such things as exceptions. None of them can be trusted."
Suicune remained silent. The conversation had reached a very sensitive area and we both knew it.
I was almost glad when a sudden shout from outside diverted our attention.
"OI! LUGIA! OPEN UP BEFORE I DROWN OUT HERE!!!"
I didn't even have to use my powers to figure out who that was…
"Ho-oh…" Came a snigger from the rug as I got off the couch and opened the stone door. The bird was standing outside, carefully balancing an assortment of bags and boxes on his wings.
"Where were you?" I asked shortly, "I heard about your escapade at the Tin Tower and figured you'd show up sooner or later. But not this late."
He grinned, though it was only vaguely visible over the mountain of things he was carrying.
"Well, I realized that I left without taking any of my stuff with me. Not that I had much stuff to begin with," He added, "But they're pretty much done for now. So I stopped by Bill's PokeMart in Cerulean and bought fifty bags of popcorn. And some Coke too, of course."
I sighed. Some things never changed. Not even in a hundred years…
"Whatever…just don't get yourself drunk in here." I cautioned, "Cause if you do, I'll have to throw you outside until you sober up. And I don't think you'd want that, would you?"
He scowled at me, dumping his purchases on my doorstep.
"Aw…shaddup…you know how much I hate water…"
"Yeah…I do…"
With that, I rushed at him, grabbed him by the tail feathers, and flung him off the narrow path that he was standing on.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!" He screeched, falling almost twenty feet before he landed with a satisfying "SPLOOSH" in the pool below. I would have burst out laughing at the sight of the ten-foot turkey floundering about in a poolful of water, but a certain cat-like pokemon had just chosen that particular moment to appear, carrying with him some disturbing news.
"Let's go. The Wise Trio have called a Council meeting. It's about the human, Uyu."
I felt my jaw drop, and even Suicune poked his head out of the cave in interest.
"He's the one."
"No way…" I mumbled. Suicune…he had been right…but then again…I felt it too…I somehow knew that the lost Guardian had returned even though I never admitted it…
Maybe they were right…maybe I was afraid…
I swallowed nervously. I couldn't…not yet anyway…it was too sudden…
"I guess we'd better get going, then." Suicune said softly, glancing at me for approval.
"I…I…just…" The words had already formed in my brain, but I couldn't seem to voice them out. I just needed more time…
Mewtwo looked at me carefully. He may not have been able to read my mind, but my reaction told him everything he needed to know.
"Lugia, you needn't come…I will explain to them…perhaps later, when you are ready."
I smiled at him, suddenly grateful, though I hated myself inside. What are you doing, Lugia? Why are you giving in to your fears? It's not like you did anything wrong at all…it was Ho-oh who did it…not you…why should you suffer?
I wished that I could just listen to that voice…just listen, and forget my guilt. But I knew it was impossible. If I had been stronger…if I had been more careful…he never would have had to die…it was all…my fault…
"LUUUUUGGGGGGIIIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'M GONNA KIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLL YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I spun around, startled.
"Ho-oh…" Suicune giggled, "you forgot about him."
I sighed. That air-headed bird was just too much trouble than he was worth.
"You go ahead." I said, turning to Mewtwo. "Ho-ey and I'll come later." The latter nodded silently.
"Suicune…are you ready?"
"You bet!"
I watched as the pale blue light engulfed them both…growing brighter and brighter until suddenly…they were gone.
-Ho-oh-
"Stupid…stupid…stupid…" I muttered sullenly, trudging back up the slope. Slopping water all over the place, I might add. That darned Lugia! He knew I couldn't swim…I must've swallowed about a half-pint of disgusting pond water in the process of trying to stay afloat…YUCK!!!
"I'm gonna murder him…" I vowed under my breath, "First, I'll fry him, then I'll zap him, then I'll peck him to pieces…and when that's done, I'll fry him again! Stupid baka…I HATE water…"
Strangely enough, when I finally got to the top, the sea slug wasn't laughing his guts out like I'd expected. In fact, he seemed almost somberly serious.
"What's the matter?" I snapped, "Didn't stay in there long enough to please you?"
"Shut up, you insensitive reject from KFC!!!!!" He shouted suddenly, swatting at me with his tail, "I have no idea where you left your brains, but they're evidently not here!"
"You've got a lot of nerve telling me that I'm insensitive, you dragon wannabe!" I shot back, trying to flame him before I realized that all I was producing was a great deal of steam. Dumb water… "You know I can't stand being wet!"
"Well, it's your own problem for not opening your wings, brain of Psyduck!" Came the counter as the slimy freak hurled an Aeroblast in my direction.
I dodged the attack, giving him a nice dose of my Zap Cannon before replying, "You try opening your wings when the ground is hurtling up to you at 150 miles per hour!"
"I see somebody finally learned to count!" BOOM!
"Yeah well, at least I know the meaning of the word 'count'!" BZZACK!
"Turkey!" BOOM!
"Prehistoric reptile with a fossilized, nonfunctional, walnut-sized brain!" BZZACK!
"If mine is walnut-sized, yours must be peanut-sized!" BOOM!
Finally, twenty-nine Zap Cannons and thirty-three Aeroblasts later, we were too exhausted to do anything but pant.
"This-is-all-your-fault-" Lugia managed to choke out, "if-you-hadn't-been-so-hasty-back-then-none-of-this-would-have-happened-"
I stared at him. That was what it was all about?! Baka…he was probably still blaming himself from letting it happen…
"You-you-really-are-an-idiot-" I gasped, fanning myself with a wing, "D'ya-really-think-that-beating-yourself-up-now-will-do-anything? It's-too-late-for-that-and-damn-I-think-I'm-hyperventilating-"
He looked as though he was about to smile.
"Stupid-bird-"
"S-s-s-shaddup!"
-The Wise Elder aka Sam-
I gazed at the faces before me, trying to appear professional. At the very edge of the crowd, I saw Mewtwo rolling his eyes. Oh right…he could probably sense that, couldn't he? Darn…
One…two…three…four…five…six…seven…eight…nine…I paused. Nine? There were eleven Legendaries. Unless…
I narrowed my eyes. Of course…those two…
"That's right," Mewtwo's voice spoke up. Which was pretty scary, considering the fact that it was in my head and all, "Lugia and Ho-oh will be coming later…"
Or not at all. I replied telepathically, watching as the pokemon's expression visibly changed and he glared at me angrily.
"They will be here."
In any case, we must get started. We have many matters to discuss today, some of which concerns yourself.
"I refuse to go. The boy has nothing to do with me."
I see your point…then it can only be-
"They will not agree…" The pokemon interrupted, "They have been away from humanity too long to return now. We all have."
They have no choice.
-Ho-oh-
"You're kidding…so they finally found the twelfth Guardian, huh?" I asked, cramming a wingful of popcorn into my beak. Lugia nodded, chewing thoughtfully on a Magikarp. We were currently perched on another path, this one dangerously close to the water's edge. I eyed him cautiously, having no intention of getting wet twice in one day.
"I still think of it…all the time…" He drooped his head sadly, letting out a long, mournful wail. The sound echoed throughout the cavern, scaring several Zubat from the rafters.
I frowned.
"Y'know…it had nothing to do with you…" I began cautiously, knowing how touchy he could get whenever the matter was brought up, "He was crazy; I had to do it…"
"It was my fault for letting my guard down." He answered bitterly, flinging a fishtail into the lake before us, "He took the blow that was meant for me and everything just went downhill from there."
I sighed. Why'd he have to be so stubborn?
"Anyway, it's over now." I tried to sound cheerful, "It's over, and it'll never happen again…"
"I suppose…"
"But it's kinda weird isn't it?" I asked, abruptly changing the subject, "I mean-all the Legendaries are Guardians, but not all Guardians are Legendaries. Like the Wise Trio. They're Guardians, but they aren't pokemon. Strange, huh? I bet they're pretty pissed at me though…probably may never forgive me…"
I broke off. I was babbling, and we both knew it. It was my way of getting rid of nervousness, as he probably already figured out.
"They should forgive you. They're sages." The dragon replied with a grim chuckle.
I laughed vaguely.
"Yeah, they are, aren't they?"
I paused for a bit, then chanced another question.
"So…are you going for the meeting?"
"I suppose…but not before this!"
The whack came as a surprise, and the next thing I knew, I had tumbled, headfirst, into the cold, chilly, not-at-all-nice pool that I had been trying to avoid.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! LLLUUUUUUUUUUUGGIIIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
-Suicune-
The Council was held inside a huge, overly-white building located somewhere on Mount Silver. It wasn't a bad place; except for the fact that there were no proper chairs and everybody was expected to meditate on a half-hourly basis. Unfortunately for us, it also had the amazing ability to amplify the smallest of whispers, meaning that Lugia and Ho-oh's shouting match wasn't exactly the most welcomed of attractions.
As the various profanities and curses reverberated throughout the dome-like structure, announcing the arrival of the last two Legendaries, Celebi began distributing the cotton wool he had saved for just such an occasion.
"Thanks," I said, stuffing it into my ears. I was quite sure he couldn't hear me, but it never hurt to be polite.
At the front of the room, two of the Wise Trio were sprawled out on top of each other with little swirls in their eyes. The last, presumably the Elder, was massaging his temples. I could almost picture him saying, "First the Tower…now this…"
After about ten minutes, the two finally entered the Council room. I almost laughed out loud at their appearances-Ho-oh was sopping wet, and Lugia's shiny feathers were blanketed by a layer of popcorn.
Judging by the number of snickers that were arising, I figured that the others pretty much felt the same way.
"Say a word and die." Lugia muttered, obviously irritated, as he stood before the Trio. Ho-oh just fumed silently, grimacing as the water formed a puddle at his feet.
The Elder shook his head.
"All right…what happened this time?"
"Nothing." The two growled in unison, glaring at each other. The matter wasn't pursued.
"In any case, we need your help for the matter at hand. You see-"
I turned to Celebi, mouthing the words "do you have more cotton?". He shook his head apologetically.
Shoot…I covered my ears with my paws, bracing myself for the impending screams, I'm too young to lose my sense of hearing…
And, as predicted, less than five seconds later came a pair of shrieks that I could've sworn made the floor beneath me quake.
"WHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTT??????????!!!!!!!!!!"
-Lugia-
What a day…first Ho-oh decides to moves in with me, then I get bombarded by packets of caramelized popcorn, and just when you think that things just couldn't get any better, Sam goes along and announces that he wants me to seek out the Guardian-Who-Is-Currently-A-Human and bring him before the Council. As a person, I might add. Imagine me walking around as one of them.
No way…there was no way they were getting me to do this…
"I'd rather be turned into a Goldeen and strapped to Ketchum's backpack." I replied through gritted teeth. Next to me, Ho-oh's face took on a "Not-For-All-The-Bird-Seed-In-The-World" look. Oh well…at least I had support…
"Well…we sorta figured that you'd say no…so we'll offer you a deal."
I clamped my wings over my head.
"Lalala…I'm not listening…"
"A years' supply of sushi."
I almost facefaulted. That was their big deal? Heck, even Ho-ey could be more creative!
"Plus new, waterproof furniture and an en-suite Jacuzzi."
I bit my lip…oh the horror…
"And cable."
Justsaynojustsaynojustsayno…
"Argh…make it five years and I'm in…"
Stupid guy knew exactly how to wangle bargains…
Ho-oh looked at them obstinately. "I'm not going to do it!" He insisted. "You can't make me!"
"An unlimited supply of popcorn and a pent house at the new Tin Tower."
The phoenix seemed interested in spite on himself.
"An unlimited supply of popcorn?" He asked.
Sam nodded. "Caramel with extra cheese."
"Alright, alright! I'll do it!" The bird was practically drooling on the spot.
The Elder smiled at us toothily.
"It is agreed, then. You begin tomorrow…"
~~Lugia: Caramel with extra cheese? That's disgusting…
Ho-oh: It's good; you've just never tried it!
Lugia: I've never dared to…
Ho-oh: I will now change the subject to save face…Notice that none of the trainers appeared in this chapter?
Lugia: Yeah…I guess pinkdragonflame forgot about them until it was too late…such a pity, huh?
Ho-oh: Lugie…
Lugia: Uh-huh?
Ho-oh: Would you really want to be a Goldeen strapped to Ash's backpack?
Lugia: -_-;;; I think all that Coke is finally getting to you…
(Officer Jenny drives up)
OJ: Hi! Are you Ho-oh, the legendary rainbow phoenix pokemon?
Ho-oh: Yep, that's me!
OJ: You're under arrest for offensive conduct, destruction of property, and the demolition of the Tin Tower without permission.
Lugia: o.O You can actually get permission to do stuff like that??!
Ho-oh: Erm…actually I'm Moltres…Ho-oh lives on Victory Road.
OJ: Oh, sorry! You wouldn't be able to describe him, would you?
Ho-oh: Well…he's about my height and weight…except that he's orange, and has a lot of flames burning all over the place.
OJ: (jotting everything down into her Officer-Jenny-Notebook) Okay…thanks! (drives off)
Lugia: (staring at dust trail) Moltres is gonna kill you…
Ho-oh: (opening can of Coke) Yeah…I know…~~
Muahahahaha!
The end (again).
For now.
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