A/N: This is based on the musical Bye Bye Birdie. Let me give you a brief outline of the characters.
Draco Malfoy: The biggest name in the music industry. 20 years old.
Ron Weasley: Draco's manager/ song writer. 33 years old.
Hermione Granger: Ron's secretary and girlfriend of eight years. 32 years old.
Ginny MacAfee (I had to change her last name): A young teenage girl living in the town of Sweet Apple, Ohio. 16 years old.
Harry Potter: Ginny's steady. 16 years old.
Mrs. Weasley: Ron's annoying mother. 60 years old.
Mr. McAfee, Mrs. McAfee: Ginny's parents.
Randolf McAfee: Ginny's brother. 10 years old.
Lavender Brown- Ginny's best friend. 16 years old.
I can't think of anyone else right now, but if I do I'll let you know!
Also, I've disregarded their ages. They're all different ages! And Ron and Ginny are no longer related.
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Bye Bye Malfoy
Act One
Scene One
RON: I can't believe it! I'm ruined in show business! Draco Malfoy- the biggest name in the music industry- has been drafted to join the fight against You-Know-Who! What am I to do now?
HERMIONE: Well, you can start by getting a new secretary. Here is my resignition.
RON: What? I need a pill. You know, my little white ones? Where are my pills?
(Ron begins to search the room for his pills. Hermione already has them and slams one down in front of him)
RON: No, cut it in half!
HERMIONE: Ron, you're 33 years old. You can take a whole asiprin.
RON: I'm not 33! I'm far from 33! I won't be 33 for another 2 days... Hermione, what am I going to do?
HERMIONE:
(starts song: A Potions Teacher)
His going in the army is the best thing he could do
Now you're free to start to do
What you wanted to.
Ronald, Ronald, Ron, Ron, Ron, Ronald!
I remember how you told me it would just be for a year,
I should trust you for a year,
But it's eight years, Ronald, eight long years Ron!
It was only a sideline, that's what you said,
You just needed some money, that's what you said,
You were going to college and get ahead,
Instead of being a music business bum:
You were going back to school and become-
RON (spoken): Don't say it, Mione!
HERMIONE: A Potions teacher!
RON: I'm ruined in show business!
HERMIONE (sung): A Potions teacher, a Potions teacher,
If only you'd been a Potions teacher.
We'd have a little apartment in near by,
You'd get a summer vacation
And we wouldn't let life pass us by.
A man who's got his masters,
Is really someone-
How proud I'd be if you had become one!
It could have been such a wonderful life
I could have been Mrs. Weasley.
Mrs. Ronald Weasley,
Mrs. Potions Professor Weasley,
The Potions teacher's wife!
(song ends)
RON: Please, you have to help me!
HERMIONE: Wait, I have an idea.
(She rustles through a file cabinet and pulls out an index card.)
HERMIONE: Ginny McAfee. President of the Sweet Apple, Ohio Draco Malfoy fan club.
(turning to Ron)
Well, what are you sitting around for? Start writing your Draco's next song! It's called... One Last Kiss. I'm going to call up this Ginny McAfee.
(on phone)
Hello operator, can I have the McAfee residence? Yes, I'll hold.
(to Ron)
You see, Malfoy will sing this on television, and he will kiss this girl goodbye before he goes into the army. It's brilliant!
RON (sitting at the piano, muttering): Oh one last kiss... it never was such bliss... umm... just tilt your head like this... no, no...
HERMIONE (on phone): Yes operator, I'll try again later.
(to Ron)
Oh Ron, this could be your big break!
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A/N: Please review!
Draco Malfoy: The biggest name in the music industry. 20 years old.
Ron Weasley: Draco's manager/ song writer. 33 years old.
Hermione Granger: Ron's secretary and girlfriend of eight years. 32 years old.
Ginny MacAfee (I had to change her last name): A young teenage girl living in the town of Sweet Apple, Ohio. 16 years old.
Harry Potter: Ginny's steady. 16 years old.
Mrs. Weasley: Ron's annoying mother. 60 years old.
Mr. McAfee, Mrs. McAfee: Ginny's parents.
Randolf McAfee: Ginny's brother. 10 years old.
Lavender Brown- Ginny's best friend. 16 years old.
I can't think of anyone else right now, but if I do I'll let you know!
Also, I've disregarded their ages. They're all different ages! And Ron and Ginny are no longer related.
************************************************************************
Bye Bye Malfoy
Act One
Scene One
RON: I can't believe it! I'm ruined in show business! Draco Malfoy- the biggest name in the music industry- has been drafted to join the fight against You-Know-Who! What am I to do now?
HERMIONE: Well, you can start by getting a new secretary. Here is my resignition.
RON: What? I need a pill. You know, my little white ones? Where are my pills?
(Ron begins to search the room for his pills. Hermione already has them and slams one down in front of him)
RON: No, cut it in half!
HERMIONE: Ron, you're 33 years old. You can take a whole asiprin.
RON: I'm not 33! I'm far from 33! I won't be 33 for another 2 days... Hermione, what am I going to do?
HERMIONE:
(starts song: A Potions Teacher)
His going in the army is the best thing he could do
Now you're free to start to do
What you wanted to.
Ronald, Ronald, Ron, Ron, Ron, Ronald!
I remember how you told me it would just be for a year,
I should trust you for a year,
But it's eight years, Ronald, eight long years Ron!
It was only a sideline, that's what you said,
You just needed some money, that's what you said,
You were going to college and get ahead,
Instead of being a music business bum:
You were going back to school and become-
RON (spoken): Don't say it, Mione!
HERMIONE: A Potions teacher!
RON: I'm ruined in show business!
HERMIONE (sung): A Potions teacher, a Potions teacher,
If only you'd been a Potions teacher.
We'd have a little apartment in near by,
You'd get a summer vacation
And we wouldn't let life pass us by.
A man who's got his masters,
Is really someone-
How proud I'd be if you had become one!
It could have been such a wonderful life
I could have been Mrs. Weasley.
Mrs. Ronald Weasley,
Mrs. Potions Professor Weasley,
The Potions teacher's wife!
(song ends)
RON: Please, you have to help me!
HERMIONE: Wait, I have an idea.
(She rustles through a file cabinet and pulls out an index card.)
HERMIONE: Ginny McAfee. President of the Sweet Apple, Ohio Draco Malfoy fan club.
(turning to Ron)
Well, what are you sitting around for? Start writing your Draco's next song! It's called... One Last Kiss. I'm going to call up this Ginny McAfee.
(on phone)
Hello operator, can I have the McAfee residence? Yes, I'll hold.
(to Ron)
You see, Malfoy will sing this on television, and he will kiss this girl goodbye before he goes into the army. It's brilliant!
RON (sitting at the piano, muttering): Oh one last kiss... it never was such bliss... umm... just tilt your head like this... no, no...
HERMIONE (on phone): Yes operator, I'll try again later.
(to Ron)
Oh Ron, this could be your big break!
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A/N: Please review!