Real Life, part 4/?
Thank you Kelly for the beta
"William, can you get the phone? I'm changing the baby."
"And I'm helping!" calls Anya. "I need the practice!"
I glance over at Harris, who is looking slightly green around the gills. "You do realize you're doomed, mate."
He smiles, though. "Yeah, I know."
We head into the kitchen, and I pick up the phone on the third ring. "Hello dare, William. How are you?" says the strongly accented voice. Jamaican? It's vaguely familiar.
"I'm fine, pet. How are you?" Let's see how long I can fake this.
"Fine, fine. And how's dat sweet little baby of yours?"
"She's marvelous." I am grinning like a fool now.
"Ah, of course. The proud papa you are." Yeah, she's right. Don't have to fake that. Never thought I'd have a kid, that's for sure. Amazing how fast they crawl into your heart and make it their own. "Is your wife available?" the woman asks.
"Hang on, pet." I hand the phone to Buffy, who has just entered the kitchen, then Harris and I go into the living room where Anya is sitting with the baby. Harris turns on the TV, and I hear the most incredibly inane theme song ever. Enough to make my ears bleed, it is.
"Small town girl in the big time world, kuh-kuh-kuh Cordy, kuh-kuh-kuh Cordy! Designin' fashion is her life's passion, kuh-kuh-kuh Cordy, kuh-kuh-kuh Cordy! Forget Gucci, Prada, and Versace, She works with what she's got, She's kuh-kuh-kuh Cordy, CORDY!"
"Hey, wait a minute..." I say. Something about that beautiful brunette looks familiar. Just as Harris is turning the channel, I see the words, "Cordy! Starring Cordelia Chase," flicker across the screen. Cordelia Chase. Hold on. That's the cheerleader. Angel's cheerleader.
Harris looks over at his wife guiltily. "Sorry," he says.
She rolls her eyes at him, but then smiles as he sits down next to her on the sofa and holds his arms out for the baby.
As I try to suss out how Cordy came to be a TV star, I can still see Buffy on the phone from where I sit. She speaks for a few a minutes, and clicks the phone off. Then she stands there for a moment, lost in thought. Just as I'm wondering if I should go talk to her, she hangs the phone up and walks into the living room.
"That was Kendra," she says to us, as she unlocks the now babyproofed weapons chest.
Bloody hell, Kendra's that slayer that Dru bagged. I knew she sounded familiar. She's still alive. But then, I never brought Dru to this Sunnydale.
"Something wrong. Buffster?" Xander asks Buffy. His voice is careful, measured. And now I'm worried.
"Oh, her watcher got wind of some temporal disturbance near the hell mouth. Disturbing the balance, yadda, yadda, yadda," Buffy says, her voice forced casual. She doesn't look up. "I guess the council had no plans to tell me, so she thought she ought to let me know."
"Well, that's good, right? The knowing, I mean," says Xander.
"Yeah, except they're large with the vagueness, not much to go on." Buffy takes out an axe and a few stakes before locking the chest back up.
"What are you doin', love? It's barely sundown."
"I need to do a short patrol." She gives the baby and I a quick kiss, then puts her jacket on and tucks the stakes inside.
"Wait, Buff, I thought we could hang out, get a pizza. We can get the kind with the pineapple and everything," says Xander.
"Yes, the *Hawaiian* pizza," smiles Anya, "in our honor!"
"Sorry, not tonight," Buffy answers.
"Wait, love, I'll go with you..." I start to say, as the door slams in my face.
So there we all are, looking at the door. "Somebody wanna tell me what that was all about?" I ask.
"Hearing from Kendra, it brings up all those Angel issues," says Anya. Harris shoots her a look, but holds his tongue. Then I realize I must be giving her a look too, because she starts to apologize. "I'm sorry, this is one of those things that everyone knows but no one talks about and I should just shut up now shouldn't I?"
Xander bounces the baby on his lap. "It's o.k., An. You're right, everyone knows that Kendra dusted Angel. Or, Angelus, actually, but still. And in my oh so humble opinion, it was no great loss. Buffy just feels responsible because of that whole moment of happiness thing. Hearing from Kendra always reminds her of what happened. Still, she hasn't done the quick exit routine in a long time. Not since you," he says, looking at me. The shock I feel must be written all over my face.
Harris gets a pained expression. "Sorry." Now he's apologizing, too. He looks from me to Anya. "He was an asshole, Will. And that was before he turned evil."
"Yeah, I know. I mean, I'm sure you're right," I manage to say.
Angelus is dust.
I'm not sure how I feel about that. I mean, I never got along with the stupid git. And after Dru, well, I wished the great poof dead plenty of times myself. Still, never really imagined it would happen. Known him for over 100 years. So much for helping the helpless and all that rubbish, prophesy boy. So, I don't quite know what to do with this new information, or how I'm supposed to feel. Although it's kind of obvious how Buffy feels.
And that pisses me off.
It's my fault, though. I made her feel all insecure with my 'is this a dream?' crap. See if I ever try to be honest again. I just buggered everything up. And now she's gone off all half-cocked and armed to the gills. Quick patrol? Yeah, right. More like her usual running away. I get the tropical twins to watch Megan, and I take off after the slayer.
It feels good to be out in the night air. Natural. However, while I am also well armed, I feel strangely vulnerable. Well, not so strangely. I'm only human, after all. Buffy has a good jump on me, but I have a feeling I know where she's going. I enter our favorite cemetery and take a gander at my old crypt. I wax a bit nostalgic. Lots of good times there. Suddenly, I hear a familiar voice yelling in fear.
"No! Please don't hurt me! I'm unarmed!" I run towards the sound and find Buffy about to take a swing at...Clem!
"Buffy, NO!" I shout. She turns on me, axe raised, her look at once curious and annoyed.
"Hello, demon? What's the problem?"
"He's a good demon, Buffy. Doesn't kill humans. The worst he does is...well, nevermind, but he doesn't kill humans, I'm sure of it." Somehow I don't think the kitten revelation would sit well with the slayer in her current mood.
She looks uncertain. "How do you know?"
"I, well, I was doing some...some demon research! And I happened to see this one, in the book. That's a face that's hard to forget, don't you agree?" Clem gives her his most winning smile.
Slowly she lowers the axe. "Well, if you're sure," she says, still gazing warily at Clem.
He turns grateful eyes on me. "Thanks, buddy. I don't know who you are, but I sure am glad you showed up when you did!" He rummages through the grocery sack he is carrying. "Here, have some mint Milano's," he offers. I have to smile.
"No, mate, You keep them. And toddle off home before the slayer changes her mind, why don't you?"
"Yes sir!" He smiles nervously. "'Night, slayer," he says. She just gives him a patented Buffy eye roll.
We watch Clem walk away, and then Buffy addresses me. "You want to tell me a., why you're following me, and 2., what the heck was *that* all about?"
"I'm not following you, I'm just...I was worried. The way you just ran out like that."
She turns and starts to walk away. I follow. Like a sodding puppy dog. "I didn't run out. I had to patrol."
I take her arm and try to stop her, but she jerks her arm away. "Buffy, I know what this is about," I say, as gently as I can manage. Bleedin' Angel, I'd stake him if he wasn't dust already, doing this to her.
"No, you haven't a clue." She keeps walking.
"What happened to Angel is not your fault. And I'm not going to leave you," I say to her retreating back. She stops, but doesn't turn around, at first. Finally she does. She is smiling, sadly.
"Everyone leaves eventually. Even if they don't want to." She takes a few steps forward. "Even if they don't mean to."
I walk the rest of the way to her and put my arms around her. "Not me, sweetheart. Not me. In this or any other world, I am with you, always." She looks up at me, and it is such a gift, to see the love there, shining in her eyes.
"You liar," she smiles. Then she kisses me. "You want to tell me why you rushed in all Lone Ranger and saved the wrinkly guy?"
"Because, he's not evil," I answer. "And, I think you should save your strength for demons who can really do some damage. Like, say, those guys right behind you."
She turns around, her back against me, and we both look at the demons advancing on us. Spiny, horned, enormous. Fyarls. I am pleased to discover that I can still understand their language. One looks at the other, and speaks.
"Crush?" it asks. "Crush now?"
tbc
Thank you Kelly for the beta
"William, can you get the phone? I'm changing the baby."
"And I'm helping!" calls Anya. "I need the practice!"
I glance over at Harris, who is looking slightly green around the gills. "You do realize you're doomed, mate."
He smiles, though. "Yeah, I know."
We head into the kitchen, and I pick up the phone on the third ring. "Hello dare, William. How are you?" says the strongly accented voice. Jamaican? It's vaguely familiar.
"I'm fine, pet. How are you?" Let's see how long I can fake this.
"Fine, fine. And how's dat sweet little baby of yours?"
"She's marvelous." I am grinning like a fool now.
"Ah, of course. The proud papa you are." Yeah, she's right. Don't have to fake that. Never thought I'd have a kid, that's for sure. Amazing how fast they crawl into your heart and make it their own. "Is your wife available?" the woman asks.
"Hang on, pet." I hand the phone to Buffy, who has just entered the kitchen, then Harris and I go into the living room where Anya is sitting with the baby. Harris turns on the TV, and I hear the most incredibly inane theme song ever. Enough to make my ears bleed, it is.
"Small town girl in the big time world, kuh-kuh-kuh Cordy, kuh-kuh-kuh Cordy! Designin' fashion is her life's passion, kuh-kuh-kuh Cordy, kuh-kuh-kuh Cordy! Forget Gucci, Prada, and Versace, She works with what she's got, She's kuh-kuh-kuh Cordy, CORDY!"
"Hey, wait a minute..." I say. Something about that beautiful brunette looks familiar. Just as Harris is turning the channel, I see the words, "Cordy! Starring Cordelia Chase," flicker across the screen. Cordelia Chase. Hold on. That's the cheerleader. Angel's cheerleader.
Harris looks over at his wife guiltily. "Sorry," he says.
She rolls her eyes at him, but then smiles as he sits down next to her on the sofa and holds his arms out for the baby.
As I try to suss out how Cordy came to be a TV star, I can still see Buffy on the phone from where I sit. She speaks for a few a minutes, and clicks the phone off. Then she stands there for a moment, lost in thought. Just as I'm wondering if I should go talk to her, she hangs the phone up and walks into the living room.
"That was Kendra," she says to us, as she unlocks the now babyproofed weapons chest.
Bloody hell, Kendra's that slayer that Dru bagged. I knew she sounded familiar. She's still alive. But then, I never brought Dru to this Sunnydale.
"Something wrong. Buffster?" Xander asks Buffy. His voice is careful, measured. And now I'm worried.
"Oh, her watcher got wind of some temporal disturbance near the hell mouth. Disturbing the balance, yadda, yadda, yadda," Buffy says, her voice forced casual. She doesn't look up. "I guess the council had no plans to tell me, so she thought she ought to let me know."
"Well, that's good, right? The knowing, I mean," says Xander.
"Yeah, except they're large with the vagueness, not much to go on." Buffy takes out an axe and a few stakes before locking the chest back up.
"What are you doin', love? It's barely sundown."
"I need to do a short patrol." She gives the baby and I a quick kiss, then puts her jacket on and tucks the stakes inside.
"Wait, Buff, I thought we could hang out, get a pizza. We can get the kind with the pineapple and everything," says Xander.
"Yes, the *Hawaiian* pizza," smiles Anya, "in our honor!"
"Sorry, not tonight," Buffy answers.
"Wait, love, I'll go with you..." I start to say, as the door slams in my face.
So there we all are, looking at the door. "Somebody wanna tell me what that was all about?" I ask.
"Hearing from Kendra, it brings up all those Angel issues," says Anya. Harris shoots her a look, but holds his tongue. Then I realize I must be giving her a look too, because she starts to apologize. "I'm sorry, this is one of those things that everyone knows but no one talks about and I should just shut up now shouldn't I?"
Xander bounces the baby on his lap. "It's o.k., An. You're right, everyone knows that Kendra dusted Angel. Or, Angelus, actually, but still. And in my oh so humble opinion, it was no great loss. Buffy just feels responsible because of that whole moment of happiness thing. Hearing from Kendra always reminds her of what happened. Still, she hasn't done the quick exit routine in a long time. Not since you," he says, looking at me. The shock I feel must be written all over my face.
Harris gets a pained expression. "Sorry." Now he's apologizing, too. He looks from me to Anya. "He was an asshole, Will. And that was before he turned evil."
"Yeah, I know. I mean, I'm sure you're right," I manage to say.
Angelus is dust.
I'm not sure how I feel about that. I mean, I never got along with the stupid git. And after Dru, well, I wished the great poof dead plenty of times myself. Still, never really imagined it would happen. Known him for over 100 years. So much for helping the helpless and all that rubbish, prophesy boy. So, I don't quite know what to do with this new information, or how I'm supposed to feel. Although it's kind of obvious how Buffy feels.
And that pisses me off.
It's my fault, though. I made her feel all insecure with my 'is this a dream?' crap. See if I ever try to be honest again. I just buggered everything up. And now she's gone off all half-cocked and armed to the gills. Quick patrol? Yeah, right. More like her usual running away. I get the tropical twins to watch Megan, and I take off after the slayer.
It feels good to be out in the night air. Natural. However, while I am also well armed, I feel strangely vulnerable. Well, not so strangely. I'm only human, after all. Buffy has a good jump on me, but I have a feeling I know where she's going. I enter our favorite cemetery and take a gander at my old crypt. I wax a bit nostalgic. Lots of good times there. Suddenly, I hear a familiar voice yelling in fear.
"No! Please don't hurt me! I'm unarmed!" I run towards the sound and find Buffy about to take a swing at...Clem!
"Buffy, NO!" I shout. She turns on me, axe raised, her look at once curious and annoyed.
"Hello, demon? What's the problem?"
"He's a good demon, Buffy. Doesn't kill humans. The worst he does is...well, nevermind, but he doesn't kill humans, I'm sure of it." Somehow I don't think the kitten revelation would sit well with the slayer in her current mood.
She looks uncertain. "How do you know?"
"I, well, I was doing some...some demon research! And I happened to see this one, in the book. That's a face that's hard to forget, don't you agree?" Clem gives her his most winning smile.
Slowly she lowers the axe. "Well, if you're sure," she says, still gazing warily at Clem.
He turns grateful eyes on me. "Thanks, buddy. I don't know who you are, but I sure am glad you showed up when you did!" He rummages through the grocery sack he is carrying. "Here, have some mint Milano's," he offers. I have to smile.
"No, mate, You keep them. And toddle off home before the slayer changes her mind, why don't you?"
"Yes sir!" He smiles nervously. "'Night, slayer," he says. She just gives him a patented Buffy eye roll.
We watch Clem walk away, and then Buffy addresses me. "You want to tell me a., why you're following me, and 2., what the heck was *that* all about?"
"I'm not following you, I'm just...I was worried. The way you just ran out like that."
She turns and starts to walk away. I follow. Like a sodding puppy dog. "I didn't run out. I had to patrol."
I take her arm and try to stop her, but she jerks her arm away. "Buffy, I know what this is about," I say, as gently as I can manage. Bleedin' Angel, I'd stake him if he wasn't dust already, doing this to her.
"No, you haven't a clue." She keeps walking.
"What happened to Angel is not your fault. And I'm not going to leave you," I say to her retreating back. She stops, but doesn't turn around, at first. Finally she does. She is smiling, sadly.
"Everyone leaves eventually. Even if they don't want to." She takes a few steps forward. "Even if they don't mean to."
I walk the rest of the way to her and put my arms around her. "Not me, sweetheart. Not me. In this or any other world, I am with you, always." She looks up at me, and it is such a gift, to see the love there, shining in her eyes.
"You liar," she smiles. Then she kisses me. "You want to tell me why you rushed in all Lone Ranger and saved the wrinkly guy?"
"Because, he's not evil," I answer. "And, I think you should save your strength for demons who can really do some damage. Like, say, those guys right behind you."
She turns around, her back against me, and we both look at the demons advancing on us. Spiny, horned, enormous. Fyarls. I am pleased to discover that I can still understand their language. One looks at the other, and speaks.
"Crush?" it asks. "Crush now?"
tbc